Love Me Like You
by SkullBunnie
Summary: Ren is tired of being afraid to let his feelings show. Kyouko meets up with him fearing the worst, how will she handle what he has to say?
1. The chicken said so

**A/N Look new story! Not sure where this is going at all but I promise there will be sweet moments and it won't be as frustrating as 'Why Don't You Love Me?' Don't let the first chapter fool you, this is a happy fanfiction. It's mostly fan service because I miss Ren.**

Lonely I sit in the dim hallway where Ren had left me. No, it wasn't me he left here, but Bo. Bo is sitting beside me now, unmoving and silently judging me. The chicken is upset with me for not speaking up. I am upset with myself, for hiding inside the chicken suit. Tears prick my eyes as I recall his words.

"I think I'm ready to tell her that I love her." I was taken aback by this. He had said that he couldn't have anybody important to him. What had changed his mind.

Emboldened by the stupid chicken I asked. "Why?" I sounded sullen and desperate to my own ears but he took no notice of my distress.

"I don't know; I guess I'm done with being afraid. I want to know if I have a chance with her, and if I do I want to be with her." There were a thousand lies on my lips, reasons to convince him to not go through with it.

I wanted to convince him of how wicked love could be. As my heart was breaking I imagined some beautiful girl, happily running to his open arms. Of course she would love him. Who wouldn't love him? And he would give her the world. All of his love and devotion would go to her and there would be nothing left for me. I bit back bitter words and looked into his hopeful eyes. He wanted advice from his chicken friend but I dared not speak out of fear that I would say something stupid. Like revealing my true identity to him, or worse commanding him to not submit to that wicked emotion.

I sickened myself, because I wished he would never confess his feelings. I knew that he would be miserable and suffer and she would never know how wonderful it could be to be loved by him. Still there was a part of me that didn't want to care about his suffering. I only wanted to think of myself and how much it would hurt when I could no longer see him again. How could I remain close to him when he was in a relationship with this girl? I could not, I would not be able to stand seeing them together. And though I am sure she must be nice, if she ever learned of my feelings for him, she would probably not like me hanging around so often.

"I think that she would be a fool to turn you down." I said swallowing the pain. My heart quivered, seeing his eyes light up. Would he ever look at me that way again? The real me outside of the chicken suit would have no reason to receive such innocent and affectionate trust. "She may already have feelings for you, but she's waiting for you to make the first move."

"It's strange, my manager has said similar words but I find it hard to believe coming from him. I find it easier to believe when I hear you say it." He confided to me.

"This girl of yours, I bet she is very beautiful." Out of morbid curiosity and maybe some level of masochism I wondered who she was. Did she maybe look a little bit like me? Was there something in her eyes, or the way she smiled that reminded him of me? I shook this thought out of my head, it was nothing more than wishful thinking. As if I could be so important to him that he'd fall in love with a girl similar to me.

"Yes, she is." The warm smile on his face was a hammer to my heart, shattering it into tiny pieces that I hope never to find the strength to put back together. "I've never met a more beautiful person."

He spoke at length about all the merits of this girl who he loved. How she was adorably naïve, and charmingly strong willed. If she would be his, he would treat her like a princess, whatever she asked for he would give her. I tried not to be bitter and to not hate her for getting everything I wanted, even him. I wished him luck and sent him on his way, presumably back to work. I hoped he wasn't going to see her.

"Kyouko-chan, what are you still doing here?" Hikaru walks over to me. "We finished filming an hour ago, I thought you'd left. You were going to go see if there was any Love Me work to do, weren't you?" Confused I look up at him, still holding in my tears. "Kyouko-chan, what's wrong?"

Shaking my head, I summon my best smile. "Nothing." I reply hopping up to my feet. "I was thinking about some things and lost track of time. You're right though, I should get going."

Sucking in a deep breath I force myself to be extra happy as I begin to gather the chicken costume together. Hikaru follows me as I walk back to set to put the costume away. He must be wondering why I had wandered so far away after filming. If I told him, I had gone out of my way to find Tsuruga-san then he would only wonder further and ask questions that I couldn't answer. If I said that I had been worried about Tsuruga-san who had been acting strange at dinner last night, Hikaru would get the wrong idea.

"Kyouko-chan." Hikaru calls out to me again. I turn to him wishing he would leave me alone. It isn't a nice thought to have but at the moment all I want is to be alone, someplace dark where I can give in to my emotions. "You left your phone here earlier. Someone called you."


	2. What are you waiting for?

Inhaling deeply, I try to calm my nerves as I sit on the plush couch and I wonder if, _she_ has ever sat in this very spot. Will I ever sit here again?

"Sorry for calling you here so late." Tsuruga-san apologizes as he sets down a cup of tea on the coffee table for me.

I imagine her lips, painted a pretty pink, sipping from this tea cup. Or maybe he has one reserved just for her. My eyes threaten to spill my emotions as he sits beside me. Has it already happened? Did he confess to her, and now he's called me here to tell me that I shouldn't come over whenever I feel like anymore?

"Mogami-san?" I choke on a sob.

Desperate pleas for him to not speak dance on my tongue. Words that I wish could say fall silently from my lips. I want to beg him to not abandon me. A hand touches my knee to stop it from shaking.

"What's wrong?" His hand is warm and I scare myself with the thought that I would like it if he touched me more.

I open my mouth to deny that there is anything wrong but I can't bring myself to lie to him. He would see right through me anyway, like he always does. I shake my head and shake his hand off of me. His touch makes me feel too weird and I start to think of things that a friend should not be thinking.

"Sorry." Tsuruga-san sighs and scoots over to give me some space.

The silence stretches between us and I am filled with dread knowing that he must be searching for the gentlest way to say that our friendship has to end. That is if he even considers me a friend and not some annoying junior who relies on him too much and too often. Some part of him must be grateful for the excuse to get rid of me. Tsuruga-san is too much of a gentleman to tell me that I bother him, so it must be a relief for him to be able to say his girlfriend wouldn't like me hanging around him.

A loud sigh draws my attention to him. He is leaned back on the couch, warm eyes pensive as they stare at the ceiling.

"Maybe this was a mistake." He mumbles. "Please, Bo, don't let this be a mistake." Is he praying to the chicken? Abruptly he sits up straight and stares at me with a determined expression on his handsome face. "I need to tell you something and I need you to not be mad at me about it."

I nod unable to deny him anything. I wish his sentence had stopped at, _I need you._

"I," releasing a shuddering breath he stands up and walks out of the room.

I wait in silent confusion, trying to listen to the conversation he is having with himself in the kitchen, but his voice is too low for me to make out any words. Have I misjudged my own place in his life? Will he miss me when we can no longer be friends?

"Mogami-san." Startled by his sudden reappearance I jump off the couch and fall to the floor, spilling the tea I had been blowing on to distract myself. He clears his throat, hiding a laugh behind his hand. "Sorry I didn't mean to scare you." His quick stride brings him over to me where he kneels and picks up the cup. Its delicate stem shaped handle broke off in the fall. "I'll have to get you a new cup." He says setting it on the table before taking my hands and pulling me up.

"I'm sorry." How could I be so careless and break one of his nicest tea cups? "I can pay for it." I bet his new girlfriend wouldn't have fallen and broken such an elegant looking cup.

"It's fine. I only bought it because it looked like it belonged to a fairy princess, and I knew you would like it." I can't bring myself to look at him as he says this. If I do, then my face will only reveal to him how I wish he meant every word of his casual playboy flirting.

"You should choose your words more carefully, Tsuruga-san. Someone might misunderstand your meaning." What I mean is someone like me might start to hope.

Warm hands clench around mine and I marvel at the feeling of his fingers entwined with mine. He uses the connection to pull me closer. Something punches me from inside my chest, forcing me to remember my heart. It beats faster as he leans down drawing my attention to his eyes. Please don't break my heart. I want to lean up and kiss him. I want him to open his mouth and tell me that I am that girl he tells the chicken about.

"You're right, I should speak plainly and leave you no more room to misinterpret what I say." I inhale his scent and allow him to pull me in closer. "I've been a coward for too long."

A hand caresses my cheek and I unconsciously lean into it. I know I should be more careful, to keep my feelings hidden, but what if this is the last time I can be together with him like this?

"Mogami-san?" I've been caught doing something weird again. Embarrassed I try to jump away but his hands hold me in place as he continues to speak. "I," he pauses, releasing a shuddering breath. "I lo…" Stopping again he clears his throat. For a moment we stand still, staring at each other nervously. When he finally speaks, his voice sounds strained. "Mogami-san, I have to tell you that I am in l…" Swallowing hard he squeezes my hands. "Maybe I should be the one in the chicken costume."

"Eh! Tsuruga-san?" I reach out to the man who falls to his knees with a heavy sigh.

"Mogami-san, I," through clenched teeth he mumbles. "I have no idea why this is so hard to say."

"Tsuruga-san?" I kneel down with him and take his face in my hands. Had he confessed, and been rejected? That is the only reason I can think of to explain how vulnerable he looks right now.

He takes my hands and stares long and hard into my eyes. He leans in and for a second I imagine that he is about to kiss me. His lips stop mere centimeters away from mine and my heart skips. I want to kiss him but before I make the mistake of pressing my lips to his, he moves his mouth to my ear.

His warm breath making my skin tingle as he whispers. "Will you go out with me?"

 **A/N Thank you everyone who reads and likes this story!**


	3. Scared

I open my mouth but I can't find my voice. _It's a trap!_ A grudge screams and I tremble at the thought of Tsuruga-san playing such a cruel joke. _He must have found out who Bo is._

"Just one date." But I can't sense any anger.

If he had found out that I have been listening to his deepest secrets, under the guise of the chicken, then he would be angry. But, Tsuruga-san is staring at me with eyes that are brimming with a vulnerable hopefulness that causes my feelings for him to constrict around my heart.

"Just one, please." He lowers his head to my shoulder. "I promise if you don't have a good time, I'll never bring it up again. We can act like it never happened, if you want. But who knows, you might enjoy it and then we could, maybe, if you want to go on another one."

"A date? You want to go on a date with me?" I struggle to keep the tears from clouding my eyes. If this is a joke that would make him even worse than Shoutaro. I don't want to believe that he could be like that. If he is than I don't think that I could survive the pain of falling in love with another abusive asshole.

"Yes, I want to take you on date." With his face tinted pink he rubs the back of his neck.

If it isn't a trick than he really must have been turned down, and now he has no one to take on the date he had planned out for the girl he loves. If he has been turned down than I'm sure he is hurting and in need of a friend. It is much too late for Bo to still be out, so he called someone who he has helped in the past to ask for a return favor. That has to be the case.

I do not open mouth to reply as he stares up at me with those beseeching puppy dog eyes. The only word that my lips want to form is, yes. How can I refuse him, when he looks so innocent? But I'm so afraid that I cannot bring myself to accept. The tears spill from my eyes and I bite my tongue as I imagine him confessing to a gorgeous model. I ache for him, with the knowledge of what it feels like to love someone who doesn't want you.

A shaky sigh sends shivers up my neck before he lifts his head and releases me. He turns his back to me and I can see his muscles tense up as he says. "It's late, I should take you home."

"Oh okay." I hear my voice say as I unconsciously follow him to the door. Normally I would insist on getting myself home, but I found no words to protest as he ushered me down to his car. After opening the door for me he rushed off, presumably to retrieve the bike I had ridden here on. I waited in silence as I repeated his question in my head.

The sound of the engine starting startles me and I look up to see him smiling at me. It is a sad smile, colored by the hope he had before he asked his question. I advert my gaze from him and stare out the window as he begins to drive. That smile of his threatens to force a yes to slip from my lips. I watch the trees blur by as I contemplate the word. I try to speak it but fear grips my mind and tells me, _He's going to hurt you._

"Mogami-san," he calls out stopping his car in front of the restaurant. Heart skipping, I fearfully hope that he will tell me he had only been joking. My stomach twists in knots as I prepare myself for his words. "I promise that I will do everything in my power to make you happy, if you let me."

I place my hand on the door handle prepared to bolt when he says the punch line. There must be an end to this joke coming. Of course Tsuruga Ren would never want to take me out, this is a cruel trick. He and Shoutaro and that bastard Reino can all meet up later and have a good laugh about stupid plain Kyouko believing for half a second that someone would want her.

Numbly, I nod and try to give him a cheerful smile. The corners of my mouth barely manage to twitch. _Don't do it!_ The grudges swarm filling my head with the memory of the pain they have been shielding me from. _He's going to hurt you._

"Tsuruga-san?" I take a breath and pull on the door handle. "Okay."

He reaches out and grasps my arm. "What?" I bite my lip opening the door.

"Okay, I'll go out on a date with you." What kind of friend must I be to think for a second that he would be as cruel as Shoutaro or the beagle? And what kind of friend would it make me to refuse his request for comfort in his time of heartbreak?

Still nodding my head, I jump out of the car, needing to be away from him to stop the pounding of my heart. It seems I am not fast enough however as the air rushes out of my lungs and I am lifted off the ground and spun around. Tsuruga-san hugs me tightly before setting me down on my feet with a mumbled apology. Arms still wrapped securely around me, he presses his forehead to mine and smiles down at me. This must be a dream. I've imagined this whole scenario, that's how stupid in love I am.

Why had I said yes? Why is he still holding me? The voices in my head still scream that this is a trap, even as the more sensible voice in me, reminds me of how kind and good he has been to me. Confused and unsure of which voice to trust I whisper, "Goodnight, Tsuruga-san."

"Goodnight, my princess. I'll talk to Yashiro about our schedules. I'm sure he'd be more than happy to block out some free time for us." He doesn't release me, and I cannot tell which of our hearts is beating so erratically as our noses touch. "Goodnight."

"You already said that." I inform him. Under his spell I rise up on my toes and press my lips to the corner of his mouth.


	4. Best Friends

_What are you going to do, when his girl comes to her senses and wants him back? He'd never choose you over her. No one would ever choose you._ It is Shoutaro's voice that echoes in my mind, reminding me of who I am. Plain and boring Kyouko. Tsuruga-san must have been turned down. There's no way that it could have been me all along. I wouldn't delude myself into believing something as nonsensical as Tsuruga Ren being in love with me.

 _Will you go out with me?_

"You imagined those words meant more than they actually did, Mogami-san. Why would Japan's number one actor ask you to go out with him on a real date? What do you like me so much that you dared to hope I liked you back?" Tsuruga-sans face forms a sardonic scowl. "When did you become such an impure girl? You disappoint me, Mogami-san."

I sigh setting my doll down and playing his words over in my head. _Will you go out with me?_ He had said it hadn't he? _Just one date. I promise if you don't have a good time, I'll never bring it up again._

"Mo, how long are you going to stare at that creepy likeness of Tsuruga Ren?" An irate voice interrupts me as I try to picture a beautiful girl, who is smart enough to gain Tsuruga-sans attention, yet stupid enough to turn him down. "Mo! Kyouko, are you awake?"

Kanae shakes my shoulder. "Moko-san!" Shoving myself out of my chair I make a leap for my best friend, feigning excitement when all I really feel is my tense nerves begging me to find a way out of this predicament.

"What the hell is with that face of yours?" She smacks her hands to my cheeks and holds my face before her. Her piercing eyes examine me for a moment before she releases me and I fall to the floor unprepared to be let go of.

"That hurt Moko-san." I complain while rubbing both of my cheeks.

"Tell me what he did this time." She flips her long black hair over her shoulder, trying to make herself appear less caring than she actually is. "First," she holds up a hand to keep me from speaking, "Was it the arrogant singer, the despicable beagle, or the useless actor? Either it was one of the first two and you don't know how to tell the third or that dumb actor said something that made you accuse him of being a playboy again. Or he's just being a child and not taking care of…"

"Tsuruga-san asked me to go out with him!"

"himself." She finishes her sentence as I blurt mine out. "What?" I'm not sure if she didn't hear me or if she just couldn't believe it.

"Tsuruga-san asked me out on a date, but I don't think he meant it as a real date. I think he confessed to the girl he really likes and she turned him down. Otherwise, why would he ask me to go with him? It must be because he doesn't want to waste his reservations or tickets or something. Right?" I look to her hoping for her to immediately agree but she shakes her head at me and turns away. "Moko-san?"

"So then what was your answer?" She questions crossing her arms.

"Umm, I think I said yes." Still not quite believing my own words I look down at my doll as if it could interpret them for me.

When Kanae turns back to me her face looks as disappointed as the doll. Then mimicking my voice, she shouts at me. "Down with love! It's evil and only for stupid people! Dating is for brainless people with no talent and too much time on their hands." Clearing her throat, she asks, "Aren't you Love Me member number one? Why did you agree to go out with him? If it really is the reservations or whatever then he should just give them to you and we can go out to eat or wherever he was planning on taking that girl."

I press my lips together to keep from accusing her of being heartless. I just told her that he was turned down which means he must be in pain; how could she suggest that I demand to go on the date he planned without him?

"That wouldn't be right, and I don't really know why I said yes. It seemed like the right thing to do." I shrug stealing glances at the replicated face of Tsuruga-san.

"I don't like Tsuruga-san very much but even I feel sorry for the guy." Kanae sits down at the table with me and pokes at the doll. "He makes it so obvious, it's pathetic. But no one wants to be on a pity date, Kyouko. What's worse is if there were some mystery girl then that would make you a consolation date, a second choice. As if you were nothing but an afterthought to heal his wounded ego." Her words piss me off. Tsuruga-san would never use me to serve his ego. "Weren't you done being used by men? What possible reason could you have for agreeing to go on a date!"

I shrug again pulling my abused doll away from her rough fingers. I can't say that he looked too cute to refuse him. That wasn't even the whole reason, although his blushing face did make me want to give him anything he asked for. Still I was too afraid to say yes and that fear had my mouth glued shut until the very last minute when I forced the words out.

"Why did you say yes Kyouko?" Why had I forced myself to accept his request? "I know you respect and admire him, but that doesn't mean you have to do everything he asks of you." I shake my head, not wanting to tell her. How do I describe the power he has over me, without making it sound like I've become a stupid love fool again? I know he couldn't possibly love me, this is not me clinging and hoping that someday he'll see me that way.

"I just want to go with him." Because there is a very large part of me that wants to have the experience of going on a date with the man I… "To be able to go out with you would be nice, and I'm sure that he would gladly allow you to take his place, if I ask. But I want to go on the date with him. And I want him to bring me flowers and try to convince me to let him spend money on me and I want him to enjoy spending time with me." Why am I crying? "I want him to ask me again. To take me out over and over because he has fun with me on this first date. I know it's selfish but I really want him to forget all about her and only see me."

Kanae reaches over and takes the doll from me. "Why?" She asks in a deep voice as she holds it up in front of me.

My mouth opens of its own volition. Words that I never wanted to give life to suddenly suffocated the air around us. Speechless, Kanae's mouth hangs open as she stares at me and I repeat the words to her.

"I love him." Only the president and Sebastian know this. I can barely even admit it to myself, but I need my best friend to know.

She says nothing as she examines the doll with discerning eyes. I squirm, wondering what she must think of me now that she knows I've fallen victim to that wicked emotion again. Will she stop being my friend? Or maybe she'll demand that I do everything in my power to eradicate this sinful feeling. I don't think I like either option. Even if Tsuruga-san never loves me back, it somehow feels good to know that I still have the ability to care about him so deeply.

"You love him?" Kanae asks sitting my doll in front of me gently. "You're in love with him?" I nod doing my best to not crumble to the floor, a shameful mess of emotions. "And going out with him will make you happy?"

"Yes." I admit staring at the doll, unable to meet her eyes. "Even if it's only for one night, I want to pretend that the person I love, loves me too. I want to be greedy and selfish and take what I want for once. And I don't want to care about that other girl's feelings. It's her own fault if she loses him to me." That's what I want to feel, but it hurts a little thinking of that poor girl who missed her chance.

"So if this mystery woman does exist, and I doubt she does, then what are you going to do if she shows up suddenly ready to love him?"

"I don't know. I guess I'll have no choice but to watch him be with her." I could just see that beautiful girl walking in on our date and taking him away from me.

"But then you'll be miserable, won't you? Don't you think that this is something to discuss with him before you go out?" Her hand takes mine. "At least ask him if there is someone else, before you get hurt."

"It's only one date, Kanae how could I get hurt?" She doesn't have to point out the obvious, I already said it. I want more than one date. I want him.

 _Y_ _ou might enjoy it and then we could, maybe, if you want to go on another one._ Was he just saying that?

"If he makes you happy, then I'll support you in this. I will say that despite what you may think, he'd have to be an idiot to not choose you over any other girl."

"Moko-san!" I know she's just being nice, but I've always wanted a friend who would say those exact words to me. I leap out of my chair lunging at her and taking us both down to the floor.

After changing and exchanging a few words of good luck we settle into our roles as love rivals. I have to contain my excitement over seeing my lovely best friend in her costume. If I looked like her I could believe that Tsuruga-san had intended to ask me all along.

 **A/N: to be continued. So there's an app called Amino with all different kinds of communities where people get together to chat about their favorite things or something and the Skip Beat community is severely lacking. I'm pretty new to the app but I think it's kind of fun. If you guys join you can find me and bug me on there, it may or may not get chapters out faster. Most likely not but, I mean you could try if you want, I'm SkullBunnie on there just like here and I'm in both the Skip Beat communities I saw there. Don't ask me how it works exactly because I have no idea, and I don't get anything for promoting it, I just thought it'd be fun to share. Off to write another chapter now.**


	5. Tomorrow?

"Kyouko-chan." Yashiro-san arrives in the late afternoon. My eyes wander behind him but I do not find his usual charge standing near him. "You have a CM shoot for the Arata group today." He's determined to remain my manager, he said that he simply got used to managing two stars and doesn't want to give it up. The man must really love to work.

"For perfume, right?" I ask trying to recall if the Arata group was the cosmetics company or a clothing line.

"Yes. The director chose you specifically and she wants you to meet with the other actor, to test your," with a blush he pauses and leans in to whisper, "chemistry."

"Chemistry?" It's a perfume commercial, how much chemistry do the actors need? Though some of the commercials I've seen lately have seemed a little risqué, I didn't expect that to be required for a perfume ad.

"Yes, there shouldn't be a problem since it's Ren." I nod not sure what he means.

"Wait, why would they cast Tsuruga-san in such a small part?" The script I had received made me believe that it would just be me being followed by male models. I had been assured by Yashiro-san himself that none of them would touch me.

"The Arata group decided that they wanted to go in a different direction. You'll still be playing the same part of an innocent young woman, but you will be pursued by just the one man." Yashiro explains as he leads me to the car. "Director Fujita saw you in Box R and she was impressed by your ability to portray Natsu as an innocent girl when in front of adults and a cruel sultry vixen while she tortures her classmates. It piqued her interest to find out that you have the same manager as Tsuruga Ren." Who told her, I wonder? I glare at Yashiro-san. "For the first commercial you are meant to be innocent and demure but slowly as the Arata company releases new scents you have to be more alluring. The male model will first pursue you, then in the next two commercials he must seduce you. In the final commercial, you have to seduce him."

"Seduce?" We stop in front of the car and to my surprise Tsuruga-san is waiting in the driver's seat.

I feel the need to run but before I know it I am practically shoved into the front seat of the car as Yashiro sits in the back. I want to protest but when I look back he has papers all over the back seat. They look important and he's carefully reading over them so I face myself forward.

"Good afternoon, Mogami-san." Tsuruga-san greets me warmly bringing heat to my cheeks.

"Go…good..." I stumble over my words imagining all the things that onscreen seduction could entail. His hand reaches out and squeezes mine and I look back to see our manager paying us no mind. "Good afternoon, Tsuruga-san." My lips refuse to stop smiling as I stare into his eyes.

"Yukihito has informed me that we'll both be free tomorrow night after six." He says releasing my hand so he can start driving.

"Oh." Did he tell Yashiro-san that I was foolish enough to kiss him? Cruelly my mind plays a scene of them laughing together behind my back.

"What we talked about yesterday, I was hoping you would let me help you with it tomorrow. Does six thirty work for you?" Yashiro-san seems to perk up as if it is news to him that we will be spending our time off together. Tsuruga-san gives me a secretive glance and I nod my silent agreement to play along. "Of course, if you have something else you'd rather do on your time off I understand."

He was giving me a way out. If I wanted to I could make up something that I have to do and we could postpone the date. Behind me Yashiro-san leans forward, further confirming that he knows nothing about the date or the kiss.

"No, I would like your help tomorrow. I don't know if I'll be able to be ready by six thirty though." There is a squeal from the back seat and I force my eyes to stay glued to the scenery outside to hide my face.

"You don't have to do anything to prepare for it. Wear something comfortable and makeup is optional." A hand touches the back of my seat and I stifle a laugh, trying hard not to imagine Yashiro-san's giddy face.

"Comfortable? I thought the role might require something fancy." Maybe we're only going to the movies and I won't need to dress up. But if we're going to such a public place then wouldn't we need disguises? At least he should take precautions. "Are you sure I won't need any sort of costume?"

"Hmm?" Yashiro-san makes a noise of confusion.

"No, in fact what you have on now would be fine." I look down at my jean skirt, simple white top and sneakers. What kind of date is he taking me on? "You look really nice today, by the way."

"Okay. Six thirty, tomorrow night it is. I won't dress up."

Another squeak from the back makes me turn on Yashiro and raise a brow at him. "Yashiro-san, is something the matter?" I'm teasing him, I know, but it's fun having a secret with Tsuruga-san. Something not even his closest friend knows.

"No, no, nothing is wrong." His voice is two octaves too high causing Tsuruga-san to muffle a laugh with his hand. Our eyes meet and for a moment I believe that it's me he wanted all along. "So Kyouko-chan, what role is Ren helping you with?" Yashiro-san questions as soon as we arrive at the studio. "Is it that mystery one you do at TBM. I have to admit that I'm curious about that job."

"What?" I don't know why he's bringing that up now. "No, I told you, I do Love Me work at TBM." I answer walking faster to put some distance between us.

"Yeah but what could it be that you have to go there every week?" Why is he pushing the topic? "You know Ren was at TBM yesterday." That's why. He must think I know where Tsuruga-san wandered off too, which I do, but I can't let them know that. "You didn't happen to see him there, did you?"

I have to turn away from both of them. "No, I must have been gone by then. You dropped me off I rode my bike home and went to bed." With luck, even if Tsuruga-san senses that I'm lying, he will assume it's about going straight home.

"So, when did you speak with Ren about needing help?" Damn this observant manager.

"Yashiro-san, go get us some water." Yashiro-san flinches, unused to the harsh tone Tsuruga-san uses. "He knows better than to pick on you around me." Tsuruga-san shrugs when I throw him a questioning look.

"Right because you prefer to be the only one who bullies me." I accuse pouting playfully at him.

"Don't call it bullying, Princess, I prefer to call it teasing." He moves closer, too close for such a public place. "What do you do at TBM every week?"

"Nothing." My voice rises and he smiles wickedly. "It's a Love Me assignment." It's not a lie. Bo was originally a Love Me assignment before it became an actual job. "Really, it's nothing. Boring gopher work. Nothing to worry about. Honest."

"Alright I believe you. I was just wondering if you knew a friend of mine who works there?" I open my mouth wanting to scream. It would be easier to tell him the truth now. Then I could talk to him like Kanae told me to.

"Kyouko-chan, Tsuruga-san!" Director Fujita calls out to us as we walk closer to set.

She's looks rather young, but from what I've heard she's much older than she appears. She had been a model when she was a teenager and turned to acting and directing in her twenties. I'm told she is very good, but that I wouldn't find her films to my liking. They are too adult according to Yashiro-san. Before either of us knew about him being in this CM, I asked Tsuruga-san about her. He shrugged and said he'd never seen a film she starred in or directed.

"Oh, look at you two! So cute!" Before I can even think of bowing to her, she has me in a vice like hug and is kissing my cheeks. "We'll do the photo shoot first so that I can gauge your sexual attraction." It is a small comfort that Tsuruga-san is blushing along with me. "Hurry up now you two. Go and change."

Director Fujita shoves us towards our dressing rooms. In mine I find two female attendants with a white bikini swimsuit. I am instructed to put it on quickly so that they can apply some light makeup on me. Self-conscious I quickly dress myself after I realize they won't be leaving to give me any privacy. The bottom ties at each side and the top ties around my neck and behind my back. I can just imagine the knots coming loose and embarrassing me in front of everyone, especially Tsuruga-san.

"What a nice body." Director Fujita enters unannounced and gives my body a look that makes me want to hide it. "When I heard that the two of you were together I admit I was perplexed, but seeing you like this, I can understand." Before I can ask what she means, she is pulling a short gauzy black swimsuit cover up over my shoulders. "Not that you aren't adorable in your everyday clothes."

I look down at myself wondering what the point of a see-through cover up is. It's better than nothing, I suppose, and at least it zips up in the front so I won't feel so exposed.

"I'm so excited. I had been worried, even though your Natsu impressed me, you are still so young and inexperienced. Then I worried that you might never have had a boyfriend and I make it a habit to only work with couples. It would bother me if I'd had to test different actors to get the right chemistry with you."

"Couples? Who's a couple?" Is this director insane? Her hands are still touching my arms and I want to shove them off. Maybe all models have this habit of being overly touchy, like Tsuruga-san when he kisses people.

"Why you and Tsuruga-san of course. Isn't that why you are able to share a manager with him? I know, I know, it's probably meant to be a secret. Shhh I won't speak of it anymore."

"Yeah but…"

"Shush! It'll be a secret between the two of us and don't worry about these two. They are experts at keeping secrets." She presses her fingers to my lips silencing my protests. This kind of director is going to be trouble for me, I can feel it. "I'm just so happy that now I don't have to hold back."

She pulls me out of the room with her arm around my shoulders and practically drags me to the fake sandy beach set. Tsuruga-san is standing there in a pair of white swim trunks. Feeling awkward and out of place I pull on the hem of my cover up. Who thought it was a good idea for plain Kyouko to be in front of the camera with the perfectly chiseled Tsuruga Ren? Director Fujita shoves me into his arms before she saunters away to speak with the photographer.

"You okay?" Tsuruga-san asks. His hands press into my back for a moment before he sets me up right and drops them to his side.

"Nervous, I guess. I've never modeled before, and now that I'm in this thing that passes as an outfit I'm wondering why I thought I could."

A finger lifts my chin and he winks at me. He leans in and whispers in my ear, "You have no idea how much I wish we were alone right now." His hands roam down my body as his lips trail kisses along my chin. I gasp feeling my body heat up and…

"Mogami-san?" I blink away the fantasy. "Relax, this first photo shoot was practically designed for you. I'm here, I'll help you if you need it, but I doubt this will too difficult for you."

"Ready?" The photographer asks and without warning he takes a picture.

The camera flashes and a pair of strong hands settle over my hips. Soft lips float over my neck almost connecting with my over sensitized skin. I'm supposed to look innocent, I'm meant to be untouchable, unattainable. But he is too good at this. When his lips hover over mine for a camera flash I tremble, and lean in closer.

His hand squeezes my stomach and I laugh pulling away from him. Reminded that I am not supposed to be easily seduced I shyly raise my fingers to his lips pushing him away. The photographer makes minimal comments, reminding me to keep my face playful and shy. I am supposed to look interested in him but timid as well.

"Very good!" Director Fujita praises as Tsuruga-san pulls the zipper of my cover up down and kisses my shoulder. "Kyouko-chan your face flushes beautifully."

By the end of the shoot my body is a million shades of red and my cover up has vanished. When the photographer announces that he is finished I release a relieved sigh. Tsuruga-san places a last gentle kiss to my temple and pulls my cover over my shoulders.

"Thank you." I mumble sliding my hands from his shoulders. "I was at a loss of what to do at first but you made it easy for me to figure out."

"Ah, as expected of a cute young couple. Whispering in each other's ears and still clinging close even after the camera stops. Though there were moments when I was worried it might seem too racy. Kyouko-chan needs to watch her expressions, but considering who her partner is I think it's understandable." Director Fujita is speaking to the photographer but her boisterous voice can be heard by everyone on set. "Let's move on to the commercial."

She speaks and everyone around jumps to action doing exactly as she commands. We move on to filming the first scene where Tsuruga-san notices me walking on the beach. There is to be hours of shooting that will only amount to a two-minute commercial. It's supposed to the perfume which attracts him to me but I am meant to be uninterested until he uses the matching cologne. As if anyone will believe that someone who looks like me could gain Tsuruga-san's attentions with the help of perfume. The thought reminds me that tomorrow night I will be on a date with this man.

"Kyouko-chan, you should back away not lean in." Fujita scolds me in the middle of filming a scene. I look up at Tsuruga-san and quickly shove him away. "Not so forcefully. Be coy and gentle like during the photo shoot. Again!"

I bite my lip afraid of the predatory look in his eyes as he pulls me back into his arms.

 **A/N: Hi, I hope this chapter was good it was kind of difficult to write because I had the scene with Kyouko and Ren planning their date in front of Yashiro but nothing to encase it in. It was just a scene floating around and I had to think of some reason for the three of them to be in the car together. Then I thought wouldn't it be fun for Yashiro to be curious about why Kyouko goes to TBM, in front of Ren? Anyway, has anyone read the current manga chapter? I am so displeased by it and I want to give up on Skip Beat for a while, but of course I won't because I have an addiction to it. It's like seriously though either give me more pages or go back to bi-weekly updates. gggrrrrr!**


	6. it Is What It Is

"He said that this would be fine." I pout at Chiori-san who is holding out two different skirts for me to try on. One is too short to even be considered a skirt and reminds me of Setsu. The other is thankfully ankle length and a deep burgundy color. I look down at my jeans and peasant top, which I had been told would be appropriate for whatever he had planned.

"This is your first date, you can't go dressed like that. I think the short one is best, since Tsuruga-san is older. I can't believe you snagged him by the way. Tsuruga Ren the most wanted man in all of Japan, has been captivated by our little Kyouko." Chiori swoons thrusting the skirt at me.

"He is not captivated and I didn't snag him. That's beside the point though, because he said that I should wear jeans." He had said it was fine but maybe I should dress up a bit. Not quite as provocative as Setsu, but I could at least try to look more feminine.

"That fool was most likely just trying to keep you from making excuses." Kanae interjects. "Chiori is right, he is older and is probably used to taking out beautiful starlets who dress like royalty." She holds up her choices of gorgeous gowns that I would look awkward in.

Once again, I look down at myself, this time feeling more self-conscious. Maybe it would be better to dress up, if I don't I might run the risk of embarrassing Tsuruga-san. Why did he have to ask me? There are so many more worthy, beautiful girls he could have asked. He might have even offered to buy a prettier girl a dress.

Kanae drops the dresses and sits beside me on the couch in the Love Me room we currently occupy. Seeming to have heard my thoughts she pets my head in a comforting gesture.

"Don't listen to us two idiots. He told you that the way you are is good, right?" I nod recalling the way his eyes had looked at me in the car. They conveyed such warmth that I blush just thinking about it. "Then you should go like this. Us two insensitive idiots were simply excited by the idea of one of us getting a date. Forgive us?"

"Okay, but at least let us apply a little makeup." I smile at Chiori while Kanae rolls her eyes. If I were to put on makeup, would he think that I had the wrong idea about this date? Would he tease me again, and tell me not to think that someone like me could seduce him?

"He's already on his way, there really isn't any time to change or apply makeup." I tell the girls smiling sadly. Besides he told me makeup was optional, he must not be taking me anywhere special.

Tsuruga-san had called twenty minutes ago to say he was on his way. ' _Unless you want to go to your place first, I don't mind picking you up there. Or I could take you and wait while you get ready, if you'd prefer.'_ That was what he had said in his pleasant tone. He is always so accommodating and attentive to the needs of others, it makes no sense that someone could turn him down.

There is a knock on the door and Chiori squeals jumping up to yank it open. Tsuruga-san enters the room dressed casually in jeans and a loose-fitting t-shirt. He looks even less dressed up than I am, yet he still manages to look like every woman's fantasy. His eyes scan over me and I feel the need to apologize for being so very plain.  
"Ready to go? I can wait if you need me to." I nod meekly but do not move to leave with him. Some small part of me had been hoping that he would show up in full on gala attire with a box for me to open. In the box, there would be the loveliest gown with a matching necklace and earing set. Of course, I would instantly become irate and demand that he stop spending money frivolously. Deep down however I would cherish the moment of being treated special.

"Mo! Get going already, before I change my mind. And you, she had better arrive home at a decent time." Kanae aims a finger at him. "She's a good girl so don't get any ideas about keeping her overnight. This is only her first date."

"Yeah!" Chiori speaks up. "And make sure she has a good time."

"Keep your hands to yourself though." Kanae adds.

"But don't ignore her needs." Chiori says giving me a shove. "Don't let her get cold, or go hungry, or be bored, and if she wants a goodnight kiss,"

"You're only aloud if she says so!" They finish together trying to sound intimidating, but I can tell that Tsuruga-san is more amused than frightened.

"As you say, ladies. I will be a perfect gentleman and treat her like a princess. I'll have her home no later than ten and I'll be sure to keep a proper distance between us, unless she requests otherwise. Do not worry about food or entertainment, as I intend to supply both, and if she becomes cold, I have a jacket she is welcome to use." His voice is teasing which irks Kanae, but Chiori doesn't seem to notice. "I promise she'll be safe." He says to Kanae in a much more reassuring tone.

"Moko-san, I'll be fine." I whisper to her. She looks concerned and I know she's thinking about our previous conversation. "I'm fine." My heart aches at the thought that this may be my first and only date with him. I want to scream at her to stop me from going, before I make a fool of myself. "I'm fine." I say again, more to ease my nerves than hers.

Nervous I play with the hem of my top as he leads me to his car. There is a basket in the back seat with a large blanket folded on top of it. I settle into the front seat contemplating what the basket could contain.

"Nervous." He teases, and my stomach twists in knots.

"What's in the basket?" I ask to distract myself. He smiles at me in a way that makes me heart jump to my throat.

"You'll have to wait to find out." My responding pout at his answer only makes his smile widen.

"Well, where are we going?" I had expected something extravagant that would cause me to find ways to secretly pay him back. I feel a little spoiled for expecting a gift or at least flowers.

"You'll see when we get there." He smiled still not starting the car.

I huff, a little disappointed by the date he had planned. I bet that his mystery girl would have gotten a present or he would have taken her to a ball or something.

"Let's go then. What are you waiting for?" I bark growing more annoyed with him by the second.

His eyes laugh at me as he points to my chest. I cross my arms over it embarrassed and suddenly worried that my shirt might be see-through.

"Seat belt." He states simply. "My desire to keep you safe outweighs my desire to take you out."

I glare at him not sure why I am so aggravated, and buckle my seat belt. A chuckle fills the silence as he finally starts the car and begins to drive us towards our destination. What kind of date could this be? Is this some sort of pity date to keep boring, lonely Kyouko from spending every night at home like the pathetic loveless child I am? Maybe this isn't really a date at all, but an outing between two people who have spent the last few months pretending to be siblings? He could merely miss spending time with me, as Cain and Setsu.

What if it's worse than that? What if he's found out that I like him and he's driving me to a place where Shoutaro, Reino, my mother, and all those awful girls from grade school and junior high are waiting to torment me?

I shake my head willing the thought to go away. He wouldn't do that, I remind myself. Then again, I never wanted to believe that Shoutaro didn't love me.

"No, ggrr!" I ruffle my hair trying to scratch the thoughts from my mind.

A hand takes one of mine, tenderly lacing our fingers together. He smiles at me briefly before bringing my hand to his lips. When he does things like that, it becomes impossible to remember why I should be afraid to love him. My stomach flips and I shiver wanting so much for this gesture to mean more than it possibly could. This is not love, it is only kindness. Consideration for others driving him to be overly affectionate in his actions. A sense of responsibility left over from our time as siblings, causing him to want to ease my worries. No, it cannot be love, if only because I want it to be and I have never gotten anything I wanted without working myself to death for it.

His hand is still holding mine though. Rubbing soothing circles with his thumb as he keeps his eyes trained on the road. I close my eyes remembering the times that thumb has traced my lips, and he had that look in his eyes. The same look that he gets when he teases me by pretending to flirt shamelessly with me. The look that makes my thighs clench together and causes a strangely pleasurable warmth to grow in the pit of my belly.

I squirm in my seat, we've been driving for a while now and I must admit it makes me a little nervous to see the city vanish into trees. I squeeze his hand drawing his attention.

"We're almost there." He states keeping his face forward. "Sorry I'm not very talkative, I want to get there before it gets dark so you can see it in the light."

"You've been speeding." I accuse, realizing that we've traveled a great distance in a short amount of time.

He says nothing as he pulls over on the side of a road and I look around. There's nothing around but the road and trees. My hand feels empty when he releases it and exits the car with the basket from the backseat.

"Here." He tries to hand me the blanket but I stare at it dumbly. "We'll have to walk the rest of the way, but it isn't far." He is staring at me, waiting for me to exit the car. "I can carry you there if you don't want to walk." Swiftly I jump out of the car and begin to walk toward the trees. "This way, Mogami-san."

Impossibly fast he is right beside me, grasping my arm and pulling me to him. It reminds me of the CM shoot yesterday. His hands had not wandered to anyplace that would be considered inappropriate, but they had been on me and his eyes held that animalistic glint. I shiver just thinking about his lips dancing centimeters from my skin as I shyly evaded them.

He wasn't lying, we don't have to walk far before the trees grow sparse and I start to see our destination. A small clearing with a slow quiet stream. It looks so much like the place I met up with Corn as a child, that I momentarily imagine my fairy prince is beside me instead of Tsuruga-san. I run forward, dropping the blanket on my way to the water. The little fish ask me to come join them and the sparkling fairies smile as they help me remove my shoes and socks, and roll up my pant legs.

"The food is over here, when you're done playing." Tsuruga-san chuckles. He has spread the blanket out on the ground and set various containers out on it, along with an unlit candle.

"You didn't cook anything did you." My nose scrunches at the memory of our unpleasant meal together. The one where he nearly killed the both of us with food poisoning.

His laugh echoes off the trees as he replies, "No, I bought all of this." I step onto the grass, watching him open a container of fresh fruit. "Well, I sent Yashiro-san to buy it."

I had been expecting something grandiose and nonsensical from a date with this stupid playboy. When he showed up in jeans and a t-shirt, it had irritated me a little, and when he didn't greet me with a stupid gift that I would beg him to return I grew more annoyed. To find nothing more than a basket in his car had made me even more upset. But, seeing him set out food that no doubt cost more than it was worth on a blanket of probably too high of quality to be on the ground, brings a smile to my face. Earlier part of me had been screaming that I deserved just as much as his mystery girl who couldn't possibly love him, did. I wanted to ask him if he really was just biding his time with me until she came to her senses. Now it feels as if his asking me here was so much more complicated than I had imagined. Because he tried to give me a simple, inexpensive date which when I think about it, is exactly what I wanted.

"Tsuruga-san." I kneel on the blanket in front of him, too close for proprieties sake, but I don't care about that now.

"Yes, princess?" His hand captures mine as it reaches for his chest. He holds my hand to his beating heart and leans into me.

"I'm scared." I can't ask him. Kanae told me that I should but I can't. Tears slip from my eyes and I apologize. I'm ruining our date over something I had decided not to worry about.

He looks around, "There's nothing to be afraid of. I wouldn't let anything happen to you." His words make me cry harder and he pulls my head down to his chest. "Hey, don't cry. Shh." A hand comes up and massages the back of my neck as his other arm tightens around my waist holding me close. "Tell me what you're afraid of, and I'll do whatever I can to ease that fear." I shake my head no, hiding my face in his neck and finding that being in his arms greatly reduces the pain in my chest.

He's too good to me. Why is that when he has a girl who is young and beautiful and is always there when he needs her? But where was she when he was in the car accident? When he was struggling with his inner demon, I was the one he called and I ate that disgusting food with him. Why, when he had told Bo that her cooking had been the best he's ever had? Slowly, I lift my head to look him in the eyes. Those warm brown eyes filled with concern and compassion.

"Tsuruga-san?" This girl of his is a high school student, she was sixteen and he was reluctant to have feelings for her. I shuffle quickly through all the girls I have seen him around that match his description of her. There must be some other girl who I am not thinking of because after going through everyone I am left with no one who can cook, and has been there through his struggles., except for, "Me?"

"What?" His fingers caress my cheek and my body leans into him of its own accord.

"Why did you want to go out with me?" I ask biting back the fear. Cupping my cheek, he bends down as if to kiss my lips but changes trajectory at the last second and kisses my forehead instead. "Why would you want to spend time with a plain, boring, useless woman who can only think of fairy tales? Why me?"

Trailing kisses along my temple to my ear, his breath causes me to shiver. "I lo…" for a moment we fall silent and I think that I might have gone deaf. "I like you." His words make my ears burn.

The fear comes back full force, biting down on my nerves. I jump away from him shaking my head. It can't be true, I must be hearing things.

"Kyo…Mogami-san!" He captures me and pulls me into his arms. Which is probably for the best because I was ready to bolt into the trees and I really had nowhere to run to. I would get myself lost and that would accomplish nothing, except getting him into trouble. "Mogami-san, can I ask why you said yes?" He asks, his lips pressed to my temple and his arms tightening around my waist.

I'm crying again. It's too pitiful, that this man should like someone as inept at love as me. I feel sorry for him for having to put up with such a plain girl rejecting him. Like a sick joke my memories reveal to me that I have been pushing him away at every turn. He's been so patient and kind, while I've been obsessed with that stupid boy who broke me. Closing my eyes, I hug the arms surrounding me and lean back into him.

"I'm sorry. I've ruined our date haven't I?" He shakes his head before resting his cheek on top of my head.

"I get to hold you. I'd say that makes for a very good date." Despite my inner turmoil his words bring a smile to my face. "But you haven't answered my question. I told you why I asked you, it's only fair that you tell me why you agreed to go out with me."

I bite my lip and turn myself around in his arms. With a shrug I say, "I don't know." I'm lying and by the way his eyes squint he knows it. He waits, staring down at me with that look that implores me to tell the truth. "I just wanted to, okay?" I won't say it. I can't say it, not to him.

"Okay fine." Softly he skims his fingers over my cheek. "I'll let that be your reason, for now."

His hand lands on my chin and his thumb glides over my lips. They tingle and I want him to lean down to take them in his. His nose rubs against mine. I can feel his breath replacing his thumb in caressing my trembling lips. I want to lean up and give him permission to kiss me.

I want to but I turn my head away instead. If my sudden rejection bothers him, he does not show it and I cannot sense any anger. I feel his warm mouth against my temple and he mumbles something that I don't think I'm meant to hear. _I swear I won't hurt you._

Those brown eyes stare down at me, no gentlemanly mask hiding the vulnerable man underneath. I lean up, hesitating for only a second before laying a kiss to the corner of his mouth. Heat burns in my face and I drop it to hide against his chest quickly, before he can see.

"I just wanted to." I answer the question before he can ask it. He accepts my words with another kiss to my head and a gentle squeeze round my waist.

"Mogami-san?" Inhaling deeply, I regain control of my facial color and look up to acknowledge him. "I can be as patient as you need me to be. So don't be afraid." The way he's holding onto me makes me want to confess my own feelings.

I should tell him about Bo, and apologize properly for deceiving him. Then I could tell him that I love him and I want to be his.

I want to be his forever.

I wrap my arms around his back and will him to understand just how much I want to be here.

 **A/N Yay new chapter! I hope you like it, next time I'll be switching to Ren's pov. I know because I already have it roughly typed up, it just needs details to flesh it out and grammar/spelling correction, and I think it's cute. I hope you'll think so too.**


	7. Let Me Love The Lonely

I pull her over to the blanket and sit down. She sits beside me accepting the plate I offer her. I am giddy with the knowledge that my feelings have not been rejected completely. True I said 'like' instead of 'love' and she won't let me kiss her lips, but this is progress. The sun is setting, making her eyes sparkle with so many shades of golden brown that I am hypnotized. She is happy again and

"Tsuruga-san?" Those mesmerizing eyes are glaring up at me as she holds up her plate. "You should be eating too." To my surprise, she holds a piece of fruit to my mouth for me to take. I gladly accept it careful of her fingers. If I bite her, she might never feed me again like this. "I like this stuff here." She dips a strawberry into some sort of fruit dip and brings it to her lips. I watch the tip of her tongue lick the dip from it.

Kuon urges me to throw her to the ground and have my way with her. I settle for watching her joyously eat the food I supplied for her. Being able to take care of her is one of the best feelings in the world. Another piece of fruit is pressed to my lips, this time with the dip on it. I am less careful than before and catch one of her fingers in my mouth long enough to lick off some dip from it.

"Hmm, that is good." I say to her blushing face.

"Bully." She grumbles under her breath and turns her attention back to the food. There are salads, and cheeses, and an array of vegetables, and some sort of noodle dish. Kyouko piles food onto a plate and hands it to me with a wicked smile.

"Now who's the bully?" I groan but diligently eat the food she has given me. Her pleased smile is more than worth the pain of eating so much.

We sit in silence as the light gradually vanishes. I wonder if I might be imagining this whole scenario. If maybe she ran into the trees scared of my words.

"Eat." She places more vegetables on my plate and I know I can't be dreaming. I finish my meal quickly, not tasting any of it. "It's getting really dark now. I won't be able to see the fish." She pouts taking my plate and putting it with hers in the basket.

"But the night fairies will come out for you to play with, won't they?" I tease enjoying how easy it feels to be with her.

Still pouting she looks up at me, "Are you making fun of me? I thought you said you liked me." We both blush and she quickly looks away from me. I make a move to light the candle I brought but she takes it from me. "I won't be able to see the fairies if you do that." Her blush deepens at her admittance of wanting to see the night fairies.

Without a word, I pack up our meal and the two of us lie down on the blanket. Kyouko looks around, probably wondering when the night fairies will come. I want to reach out and touch her, to hold her in my arms again.

"Look, see there's one." She whispers pointing to a single firefly that has appeared near the water. Eyes alight with wonder she crawls closer and kneels near the water. "Hello." She greets it reaching a hand up and the way it flies closer to kiss her outstretched finger is almost enough to convince me that it must be a real fairy.

"I mean it you know. I really do like you." Her eyes turn to me drawing me in. "Why does that make you sad?" I ask noting the tears brimming her eyes. Her head shakes looking down. "Do you think I'm lying?" Tentatively I move closer to her. She shakes her head more vigorously scooting back further as I advance. "Mogami-san…"

"I told you I'm afraid." She trembles, leaning as far away from me as possible without falling into the water. "There has to be another girl out there. Some beautiful, perfect girl who is better than I am in every aspect of her life."

"There isn't," I lift her chin forcing her teary eyes to look at me. "Not for me. You are the only one for me."

"Promise?" A drop of water lands on her cheek startling both of us. I look up as more drops start to fall lightly over us. "Tsuruga-san?" She pulls on my shirt to regain my attention. I smile pulling her to her feet and shielding her in my arms. "Do you promise that there's no one else?" She leans up almost touching her lips to mine. I nod moving the slightest bit closer.

"I have never loved anyone else, only you." Her eyes go wide at my words but before she can object to them I press my lips to hers.

I feel her hands press against my chest and reluctantly pull away, bracing myself for the onslaught of accusations. For a moment, we stare at each other as the rain drizzles down on us. I lick my lips, nervous about what she could be thinking. It shocks me when she pulls me down, bringing our lips back together. Her arms wrap around my neck and her fingers wind themselves in my hair.

"AHH!" She screams when the rain begins to pour down harder. To my delight she clings tighter to me.

"Come on." I take her hand pull her and we begin to run back to the car.

"Tsuruga-san, the food!" Of course, that's what she would worry about now. Her laughter echoes around the trees as I scoop her into my arms and run faster with her, before she can turn back for the stupid basket. I open the door and quickly help her into the back seat.

In my trunk, there is a bag of extra clothes, courtesy of my thoughtful manager. I pull the bag out and toss it on the seat beside her then get into the front. She thanks me, pulling out one of my shirts. She hands the bag forward and our eyes collide. Golden eyes stare at me through the rearview mirror.

"Go ahead and change. I promise I won't look, I don't want you to catch a cold." I say adjusting the mirror to give her some semblance of privacy. I can hear her peeling her clothes from her body and I fight the urge to turn and stare at her. To distract myself I remove my shirt and pull a sweat shirt out of the bag to wear. By the time I am done, she announces that she is finished and I hear a quiver in her voice.

I turn around to see her in nothing but my oversized shirt. With her wet hair dripping water down her face and her eyes looking down, she looks like a lost kitten. Her hands are busy folding her pants and placing them into a neat pile along with her drenched shirt and bra. My pants aren't as wet, and it would be too much of a hassle to try to change them in this small space so I leave them. She climbs into the front seat giving me a glimpse of her pink cotton panties. They match her bra in color and I can't help but wonder if they also have black lace around the top edge. Blushing she sits down quickly pulling my shirt over her knees.

"Sorry, I should have checked the weather before planning this." I feel guilty for seeing something that she didn't want me to. "Here." There is a blanket and an unopened box of cereal bars in the bag. I hand her both before starting the car.

"Thank you." Shivering she covers her legs with the blanket and checks the date on the box. With the way I eat, I wouldn't be surprised if she expected them to be more than a couple of years old. I'm not so sure they aren't. "Yashiro-san must regularly repack this bag for you." She concludes opening the box and taking out one bar. "We shouldn't have left that basket behind." She probably had plans for those expensive leftovers. I shrug not really caring about the food or the basket.

"Let's get you home." I say turning up the heat and beginning to pull out of my parking spot.

"If you don't mind, I'd rather not walk into the Darumaya like this. Can I stay at your place tonight? That is if you want me to! I mean, I know I shouldn't invite myself…"

"Mogami-san I'm surprised at you!" I gasp interrupting her nervous banter.

"I'm sorry, it was rude of me to ask…"

"On the first date? You really think you're ready for that?" Her embarrassed blush and contrite expression morph into an indignant glare when she sees the mischievous smile on my face.

"Tsuruga-san are you teasing me?" I shrug earning a pretty pout. "You're supposed to be a gentleman. Don't imply," she pauses, either searching for a word or perhaps trying to twist my words to mean something else.

"What?" I ask innocently.

"Nothing, just drive." Her bare feet are tucked underneath her and she is twisted in the chair to face me.

"Seat belt." She obeys my command but does not adjust her sitting position. I'm not sure if the safety features of the car work with her sitting like that. "It got cold fast." I comment turning the heat up. "I don't want you to get sick."

She says nothing and I look over to see her large eyes staring at me. Is she mad?

"You said love." I had hoped she didn't catch that. "No one, besides Corn has ever said that they love me."

"Oh sweetheart." I offer her my hand and she grips it in both of hers. It isn't the safest way to drive but I make it home without incident. I look over at her to find her eyes closed and her breathing deep and steady. When did she fall asleep? "You better not let yourself be this vulnerable around other people. Who knows what they'd do to you."

Opening her door, I lean down and caress her face. If she wakes up while I'm carrying her, she's bound to throw a fit. Throwing caution to the wind I unbuckle her and lift her into my arms. Let her accuse me of being inappropriate. I carry her to my guest room and pull the covers back to set her down. A pair of sleep clouded eyes stare up at me as I tuck her in.

"I promise you, my heart is yours."

 **A/N So I'm wondering if anyone has any requests or suggestions. I've pretty much figured out that this story is going to be long and if you've read my profile where I list future ideas for stories, a couple of them will be appearing in this story. Since I'll be writing this one for so long I'll need occasional breaks from it and it would be helpful if I could get suggestions for one shots or something for Continuations. Aside from that I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter, I know this whole story is impossible and we'll probably be stuck in relationship limbo with Ren for five more years but that's sort of the point of fan fiction isn't it?**


	8. Apologize

**Ren**

I'll be punished for this in the morning. She's going to scream and accuse me of being a pervert. If I don't get up and leave this room, I won't be able to deny that I am in fact a pervert. Though she had said that she wanted me to stay, I know that her words don't really count, her being half asleep and all. Her eyes heavy with sleep and her tiny hand gripping my sweater, she had murmured her request for me to sleep with her. I know those are not words that she would ever consider speaking, but they made my heart flutter and I couldn't help obeying her command.

I know since she is asleep again, now that I should get out of this bed. I should remove my arms from around her, and lift her head off my chest. What I should not do is sink my fingers into her hair and sigh contentedly, breathing in her scent while closing my eyes and drifting off to sleep.

 **Kyouko**

Deeply inhaling the familiar scent, I snuggle into the warmth of the body lying beneath me. Vaguely I recall asking him to stay and I shiver at the thought that he actually had. My memory bombards me with the kiss we shared in the rain, and me removing my clothes in the back seat of his car. Though I am certain that he kept his eyes forward the entire time, I can't help but blush with embarrassment at the knowledge that I had undressed with him so close.

Had I dreamed all of it? Or did Tsuruga-san really confess his love to me? My hands reach for him, begging reality to match up with my dreams just this one time. Nothing except warm sheets greet my fingertips.

"Tsuruga-san?" Not fully awake I sit up to examine the emptiness of Tsuruga-san's guest room.

I look down at myself in nothing but his shirt and reality hits me like a ton of bricks. I had done all those things yesterday, including making Tsuruga-san sleep in the bed with me. And I had kissed him. My mouth falls open and my breath catches in my throat as the humiliation of the situation sets in. The worst part of this whole catastrophe is that I am wearing next to nothing and I have no shoes to escape. Not to mention the man who supposedly loves me isn't even here to calm my quivering nerves.

"Tsuruga-san?" I call out again, hoping that he will pop his head in to smile at me. If I could see that warm expression I would feel better about giving in so easily to his declaration of love. Silence is my reply causing my heart to race in apprehension. "Tsuruga-san!" He wouldn't leave me here would he? With no way to get home and no phone to call for assistance.

I pull the covers up to my chin trying to come up with a logical reason for him to not wake me up and offer to drop me off. Sure, our drenched clothes had been sitting in the car all night and wouldn't smell the best, but they would be dry by now. I could have worn them home and changed when I got there. My wondering mind is interrupted by the familiar twinge in my stomach that tells me it's time to eat. If he had any sense he would have at least woken me to feed the both of us. I growl at the embarrassment of having to walk out of the bedroom in nothing but a shirt, even if it is long enough to count as a dress. The kitchen floor will not show mercy to my bare feet. First, I need to muster the courage to step out of this bed onto the plush carpet. Sneaking glances at the door I slide one leg out of the protective warmth of the blanket. When no one comes in to offer any further awkwardness to the situation, I turn my body and throw both legs over the edge of the bed.

"Tsuruga-san?" I ask the empty room again, only to receive no reply. "Jerk, I thought you said you loved me." The words cause heat to rise in my cheeks and I look down to avoid eye contact with no one. "What's this?" Folded up and placed on the night stand is a fluffy robe that I am sure I have seen hanging in the bathroom before. Did he leave it here for me? I lift it up and a slip of paper floats to the floor.

 _Good morning, Princess, hopefully I'll be back before you wake up. If I'm not please find yourself something to eat, I'll be back soon. Wear the robe if you're not comfortable walking around in my shirt._

 _I love you. - Ren_

I shake my head at his ability to chase away all my fears. My heart flutters suddenly less afraid of what he must think of me throwing myself at him and being such a wanton woman as to ask him to stay with me.

The robe is too large for me, of course, but it's soft and envelops me in his scent. I giggle at the hem dragging on the floor as I walk out to the kitchen. How am I supposed to cook with this thing on? I roll the sleeves up to my elbows and begin to rummage through the fridge which has been a lot more well stocked recently. Probably so he can avoid being reprimanded for his eating habits. Pursing my lips, I make up my mind to punish him for leaving me by myself, even if he did leave a note I'm still irritated by his absence.

 **Ren**

Finished with my little shopping trip I sneak into my apartment and passed the kitchen, where I can hear Kyouko making something that smells delicious. I'm not someone who cares for food, but I would be a fool to object to anything she cooks for me. I head into the guest room and set down my contraband, already prepared for her protests. Let her scream her little head off, she has no choice but to accept.

"Tsuruga-san, I hope you're not trying to get out of eating breakfast." Her stern voice beckons me to the kitchen.

"Of course not. I would never let your food go to waste." Kyouko doesn't look amused but my god is she adorable in that oversized robe. I saunter over to her with one of the boxes I had brought home and fall to my knees in front of her. "Honest, Princess, I'll eat as much as you want me to."

Her feet are cold as I take them one at a time and slip them into the plush slippers that cost more than I'll ever admit to her. A small squeak rises from her mouth as she looks down at the lavender colored slippers embroidered with 'princess' in a soft pink.

"What? No, Tsuruga-san you shouldn't spend money on unnecessary things? Hm? Aren't you going to complain and accuse me of buying you things because I have ulterior motives?" The blush on her cheeks indicates that she recalls our conversation of men buying things for girls to wear. She doesn't say anything, though. Not even a word of thanks before she returns to serving up breakfast. I am more than satisfied with her lack of protest and the smile adorning her face, but it is a little unnerving for her to be so non-vocal. "What's that?" I change the subject to the two boxes of food set aside. "Our lunch?"

"That's your lunch and your supper." She answers earning a groan from me. I could eat half of the contents in one box and be full for the rest of the day. "I expect a video clip of you finishing all of it."

"Yes, ma'am." I easily submit to her wishes but take her in my arms and with a wicked grin demand. "You have to give me something in return for my compliance though." I touch her lips and it's the only hint she needs to understand what I'm asking for.

"Umm," she closes her eyes, squirming nervously in my arms. I tilt her head up to look at her adorably blushing face.

"Later than." I concede with a kiss to her forehead. Last night's kiss had been a welcome surprise but I have no intention of pressuring her into giving me more than she's ready to. "I brought you a change of clothes, in the guest room." I inform her as I take the food she has prepared over to the table.

Suspicious eyes look down at her slippers then to the box they came in, which I had left on the floor by her feet. She glares at me and I can hear her screaming in her mind, _he better not have bought me anything else!_ I flash her an innocent smile and her mouth drops in disbelief before she dashes out of the room.

"Tsuruga-san, what is all that?" Smiling happily, I watch her come out flailing her hands in the direction of the room. "Get up right now and take those clothes back to the store."

"I can't." I shrug standing smugly in front of her.

"Why not?" I wonder if she notices that she has moved closer to me. Her palms rest on my chest as she pushes herself up on her toes to glare at me. "I don't need all those clothes. I bet one shirt costs more than my entire outfit yesterday. And purchasing undergarments for me is completely unnecessary and indecent and I can't wear..." She pauses for a moment then turning a deep red she asks, "how did you know what size to get?"

"I pay attention." I reply wrapping her in a tight embrace.

"What does that mean you perverted playboy?" She pushes against my chest, suddenly noticing how close we are.

"I'm the pervert? You have my exact measurements down to my bones memorized. Which is extremely creepy when I think about it, yet I still love you." She opens her mouth, my words rendering her incapable of uttering a word. I hope she's more speechless because I said I love her again, rather than her taking my comment about her being creepy serious. "Now if you don't mind, my princess has prepared for me a lovely feast which I intend to eat before dropping her off at home. So, go get dressed because if you make me late for work I'll have to punish you. Most likely with something more expensive than clothes."

Sulking she mutters, "You're a bully," under her breath before shoving away from me.

I grab her arm and pull her back to me. "See, now I have to punish you."

"Tsuruga-san!" She gasps as I lift her in my arms and press my lips to her ear.

Horrendously sweet words fall from my lips, each one designed to deepen the color of her already flushed cheeks. The way she squirms and protests would give a bystander the impression that I am saying something dirty, but mostly my words are compliments. "You are the most precious person in the world to me."

"It will be your fault if we're late." She finally says after having enough of my torture. "Put me down, I'll go get dressed." I set her down, patting her head as she pouts. "If you don't have time to take them back, you could give the receipt and I could do it during my lunch." I scowl at her. "I didn't think that would work, but why did you have to buy so many outfits?"

"They're just clothes, don't worry about it too much." She is worried though, and I have only myself to blame. "I don't expect anything from you in return, it's kind of a learned habit to spoil the one I love. My father used to buy my mom gifts all the time, he probably still buys her things. She had her own money but he was a doting idiot." She makes a funny face which I don't quite understand. "What I'm trying to say is, I'm a doting idiot and I can't help myself."

"Even if that is the truth, you didn't have to go out so early in the morning to buy me a whole new wardrobe. Those clothes won't fit in my closet at home, I have no choice but to not except them and leave them here." I shrug having intended for most of them to stay here for her to use next time. That is if she allows there to be a next time after this.

"I had to go out and get you something, your clothes from yesterday are being laundered, and we left your shoes last night. So, I bought some that I thought you'd like. Are they no good? You don't like them?" I plaster my best pout onto my face and watch her struggle to remain unaffected by it.

"Fine!" She growls shoving me away so she can stomp back into the guest room. "Only because we'll be late if I sit here arguing with you."

I wait for her to come back to start eating. She ignores my compliment when I tell her how adorable she looks in her new outfit. Once again, I am punished with her food attack as she adds it to my plate with a silent understanding that I will eat as much as she wants me to.

"I'll have to add to my exercise regimen if you don't stop." I'm only half serious as I push her chopsticks back to her own plate. "Here before I forget." I reach into my pocket amused by the horror that flashes across her face at the thought of another gift. "You left your phone in the car." I explain before she has a heart attack.

"Oh, thank you." That she's thankful for?

"Mogami-san, you do know how to accept a gift. That's a relief, and here I thought you had forgotten the words to express gratitude." I'm teasing but I know it'll cause her to overreact. It's evil of me to joke with her like this, but my god is it amusing to watch her fall to the floor in shame.

"Forgive me, Tsuruga-senpai, for being ungrateful, and wanton, and rude, and selfish, and please, please forgive me!"

"Wanton?" I question, wondering what could be going on in her head. I had only been teasing about receiving gifts properly.

Blushing she shrinks further to the floor. "I have been meaning to apologize for making you sleep with me last night. Also for inviting myself to stay the night."

"Don't apologize for that, I'm happy to sleep with you whenever you want." At first, she sits up looking relieved then I suspect my words have sunken in and she shoots me an annoyed glare.

"Why do you always have to tease me like that? I was being sincere." I wink at her before standing up and beginning to clear the table. "I'll do that." Recovered from her bout of shame and contrition, Kyouko jumps up and helps me clean up our mess before we leave for the day.

"Tsuruga-san?" In the car, on the way to the Darumaya she offers me her hand. I lay a kiss on the back of it all too happy that she has initiated contact. "You don't talk about your family very much." She begins, causing my forehead to crease in confusion. "Does your father really buy your mom a lot of presents?"

"Yes, he does. He always spoiled the both of us." I pull up in front of the restaurant a bit grateful that she'll have to get out of the car. Her asking questions could quickly become dangerous for me.

"I bet your mother is beautiful." She makes no move to get out of the car. I nod, ready to say goodbye and press the urgency of me leaving for work. "Will I get to meet her?"

How do I answer that? Of course, I want her to meet my parents and it's a dream come true for her to want to meet them. Hopefully it means she thinks about our future, just a little. I don't know how to explain to her that their meeting is probably years away.

"Someday." I say earning a pout from her. "Does you wanting to meet them mean that I get a second date?" The question is both a distraction and my honest request to take her out again.

A pretty smile adorns her face as she nods. "I had fun. If you can convince Yashiro-san to give us some time together again." Somehow, I don't think she believes that will be a difficult task. A thrill runs through me as she leans over and presses her lips to the corner of my mouth. "Thank you for the presents." She raises her finger to jab my nose. "That does not mean I condone your behavior of buying frivolous things, but I will accept it this one time. Only because my clothes were ruined and my shoes were lost." I nod kissing her forehead. "Remember this one time only. Don't do it again."

"Of course not, Princess." She sees straight through my lie but smiles all the same as she exits the car. "Have a nice day." If I had more time I would like to stay and wait for her, but I have to step on it to get to work already. With any luck Yashiro won't ask why it took me so long to pick him up, or question the two lunch boxes.

 **A/N: I seriously need to work on details. At least I think so. For some reason I feel really ooc in this chapter, I hope it isn't too bad though.**


	9. LaLa

Kanae paces her bedroom floor, the vein on her forehead visibly throbbing. Chiori-chan is laughing so much I fear she might lose control of her bladder on Kanae's bed. I bite my lip, starting to rethink this sleep over with the two of them.

"Tell me again, why you couldn't go home." Kanae demands, stopping in front of me with her hands on her hips. She doesn't wait for me to give a reply, choosing instead to scold me. "Do I have to explain to you the way a man's mind thinks? You might see nothing wrong with spending the night or sharing a bed, because he's such a gentleman, but I'm telling you that underneath that good guy façade is a hungry beast. A beast who has singled you out for his next meal, I might point out, and there you were undressing at his command and jumping into his bed."

I almost say that we've shared a bed before but I stop myself, before adding things to the conversation that I'll have to explain. "It was the guest bed, and I didn't undress for him. I was changing out of wet clothes to keep from freezing. It really did start raining suddenly and the temperature dropped dramatically fast. He didn't peak at me, I'm sure of it." Looking down at myself I add. "It isn't like there's much for him to look at in the first place."

"Shut up, I'm not done scolding you. Chiori, stop laughing, that damn false gentleman broke the promise he made to us." Kanae turns on Chiori who only laughs louder. She broke into her fit right around the time I told them about Tsuruga-san inappropriately whispering stupid mushy words into my ear.

"Oh, calm down and let me live vicariously through her." Chiori says after holding her breath long enough to stall the laughter. "Tell me again about the kiss. And don't leave out any details, I want to imagine kissing Japan's hottest star." I can't tell if she's serious or teasing me.

"No way, it's embarrassing enough that I actually dared to kiss him. What must Tsuruga-san think of me? I can no longer claim to be a chaste maiden." It makes my heart race just thinking about pressing my lips to his. The rain pelting against us, forcing me to cling even tighter to him.

"I'm sure he hated it." Kanae says taking a seat beside Chiori on the bed. I'm on the floor, sprawled out in embarrassed defeat. "That's why he asked you to kiss him the next day. It makes perfect sense."

Chiori snickers leaning over Kanae, "I was so disgusted by your lips on mine, that I must subject myself to the torture and beg you to kiss me again."

"Oh senpai, I just couldn't bear to punish you in such a lewd manner." Kanae mimics me, making her eyes large and folding her hands in her lap.

"But I love you, let me whisper all of the reasons for my love in your ear."

"Alright, but only if I can freak out and take them as an attempt to bully and abuse me." I sit up to glare at them. Chiori leans closer to Kanae, pulling off her best seductive face, but it fails to compare to the true face of the Emperor. "Oh Tsuruga-san, please don't look at me like that. If you do I will lose my chastity."

"Why does everybody have to pick on me?" I moan falling back to the floor with a thud.

"Because you're too cute for me to resist." Kanae takes over the role of Tsuruga-san and I must admit she does a better job at it than Chiori. Coming over to me she loses her Tsuruga persona and asks, "When's the next date. We'll have to pester you about it before and after."

"And of course, we'll help you get ready this time. No more jeans, and at least put on a little bit of makeup. Half the fun of dating is dressing up for it, isn't it?" Chiori chimes in, picking up a makeup brush from Kanae's desk before coming over to me and tickling my nose with it. "And as your friends, we want you to have fun."

"Even if it is with that freakishly tall liar of a man. Who broke his promise to have you home by ten." Kanae adds crossing her arms under her chest. "Just saying."

"Well, technically he did have her home before ten, it was just in the morning instead of at night. Maybe we should specify for him next time." Chiori chimes in holding the brush handle to her chin in thought.

"He'll just find a way around it again." Kanae concludes before turning back to me. "So, when's the date"

I shrug. In the three days since our first date, I've seen Tsuruga-san multiple times, but it was always when Yashiro-san was there and paying too much attention to his charges. He texts me, but it's usually meaningless compliments and his playboy antics, asking me what Kanae calls suggestive questions that I struggle not to take the wrong way.

"We haven't really talked about it. He might have forgotten that he asked." I can't help the sadness that creeps into my voice.

"Yeah, I'm sure Mr. Obsessed with Kyouko, forgot that he has a date with Kyouko." Kanae says plucking my phone off the floor beside me. "And I'm just as sure that if he happens to receive a call from Kyouko at midnight he'd be too tired to answer."

"Moko-san!" I make a grab for my phone but it's too late, she's already hit the call button on his name.

"Oops, it's ringing." She giggles pressing the phone to her ear. "Senpai, you answered for me! I'm sorry if I woke you, but I just had to hear your voice before going to sleep."

"Give me that!" I snatch the phone away from her and immediately panic. What am I supposed to say now?

"Mogami-san?" A thrill rushes up my spine at the sound of his voice through the phone. I haven't spoken to him today, and I missed him.

"Yes?" My reply is followed by a chorus of mock yeses from my friends.

"Is everything alright?"

"Everything's fine, Moko…Kotonami-san was joking around. I'm sorry that we disturbed you with our childish games." He chuckles softly.

"It's alright. In fact, I was just thinking of calling you." The dark undertone to his voce makes me shiver. "Hearing your voice before bed brings me good dreams." I close my eyes, attempting to control my heart beat. Whenever he speaks, no matter what he says, lately my mind turns his words into something immoral. If he knew my sinful thoughts, he would not think of me as a nice girl anymore.

"Oh, she's blushing!" Chiori bursts, taking the phone away from me. "Guess what, Kyouko-chan has been over here telling us all sorts of things about you. Even Kanae is jealous. Hm?" She listens to something he says then holds the phone up, aimed at me. "Now you'll be able to see for yourself. You owe me."

"What the hell did you just do?" Kanae asks looking at the phone. "Ooh, racy pajama pick." Making her voice sound more alluring she whispers into the phone. "Lucky you Tsuruga senpai."

"Here you go, we've had our fun, I'm going to bed." Kanae says handing me the phone.

"Me too." Chiori yawns. "Goodnight Tsuruga-san." She calls out before tucking herself into her futon.

I hold the phone to my chest forgetting for a moment that I have someone on the line. My heart slams against my chest envisioning Tsuruga-san's face when he received the text of me in my pajamas.

"Mogami-san!" His loud voice beckons me back to the phone.

"I'm sorry, Tsuruga-san." I apologize once I get back to him.

"Don't be. That was amusing and now I have a picture to make my dreams extra fun."

"Goodnight, Tsuruga-san." I stutter into the phone, wanting to end this conversation.

"Goodnight, Princess, sweet dreams." I hang up and shake my head at my best friend, who is still standing beside me despite declaring her intention to go to bed.

"Princess!" She mocks in a breathy tone. "Can the guy get any sappier. He's a little pathetic, honestly."

"Moko-san, you're so mean." I pout scrolling through my phone to delete the picture Chiori had taken of me.

"I think it's cute." Chiori announces. I blush grateful that she has put into words what I cannot.

"You didn't even ask about your next date. Should we call him back?" Ignoring her, I walk over to my own futon and wish her a goodnight. "Okay. Okay. Goodnight to you too, Princess."

Hours later I wake up with an uncomfortable feeling, that's starting to become extremely familiar. There's a fuzzy warmth in my stomach and an uncomfortable dampness lower down. I blush crawling out of my futon cellphone in hand and rushing to the bathroom. It isn't right, to be thinking of him like that at such an hour. Before I can stop myself, my fingers are gliding over the buttons and hitting send.

 _Yes, I'm awake._ Comes his reply followed by, _you okay?_ He had probably been asleep, but he would never let me know that.

 _Can't sleep._ I send back and wait impatiently for his reply. The phone buzzes and I look down to see that he is calling me.

"Hi!" I answer too eagerly.

"Do you want me to pick you up?" Somehow, I had been anticipating those exact words. I nod forgetting that he can't hear me, but it doesn't matter he's already on his way.

Before I know what's happening I am in his car and I am all over him. My lips meld with his, my hands sink into his hair tugging him closer, and my legs wrap around his hips. We are in his backseat, and I'm not altogether sure how we ended up here, instead of driving to his place. His hands slip under my shirt as his hot mouth makes a trail of fire down to my neck where he begins to suck. My pulse quickens as he bites down. I moan begging him for more and bucking my hips into his wildly until…

I am zapped back into reality. I open my eyes hearing my phone vibrate somewhere near my head.

"What the hell was that?" I ask myself, sitting up and grimacing when the oddly familiar sensations from my dream turn out to be reality. They are the only thing that are, as a quick scan around myself reveals that I am still in the room with two sleeping girls and not the lust filled man of my dreams. "Stupid dream. It isn't right to think of Tsuruga-san in such a way. He would never," I pause to rethink my words. "Certainly not in the car at least, where anyone could catch us."

Casting out the offending dream I check my phone to see that reality is much crueler than I had imagined. _Do you want me to pick you up?_ The text reads and I slap my hands over my face. Another buzz alerts me to a follow up message. _Yashiro-san informed me that both you and Kotonami-san have jobs today at eight, I hope you're not still sleeping._

I check the time and gasp in shock, we have less than an hour to get to work. I shoot him a reply as I jump out of the futon and scream at the two to wake up.

"Moko-san! We'll be late if you don't hurry!" The three of us rush to get dressed and ready before running to Tsuruga-san's waiting car.

"Morning," he greets us as we jump in.

"Morning!" My friends coo in his ear from their places in the backseat. I find it impossible to speak and even more difficult to look at the backseat. Which is why I'm sitting up front with my eyes fixed on my hands in my lap.

"Where's your manager?" Chiori asks, noting the absent bespectacled man.

"Running an errand for me." Tsuruga-san answers easily as he drives to drop off Kanae first. She is going to be on a morning show promoting her mystery series as well as herself in general.

"I can walk from here." Chiori announces as Tsuruga-san pulls over to let Kanae out. Placing her hand on my shoulder she whispers too loudly, "Have fun Kyouko."

Alone in his car my dream becomes more vivid in my mind and shakes me to the core. His hand reaches for mine but I pull it away, pretending to push my hair out of my eyes.

"You okay?" He asks, showing no sign that my action bothered him at all. "Is there something wrong with the backseat?" I turn around suddenly made aware that I have been staring back there imagining his hands sliding down my back and cupping my…

"Nothing!" I shove the image away, forcing my body into my most proper seated position. He chuckles flicking my hair. I look up to see we are in the LME parking garage.

"I'll be done around nine tonight, if you'd like we could have a late dinner together." He pulls on a lock of hair, gently moving my head to face him.

"Okay." I bleat nervously, blushing helplessly as his face moves closer to mine. He pauses for a moment, resting his thumb on my chin as if he is going to pull me into a kiss. I press my lips together to afraid of what I might try to do if we kiss. No disappointment shows on his face as he gives up and kisses my cheek. "Tsuruga-san, someone might see!"

He backs away, and for just a moment I see hurt mar his handsome face. "You should get to work. Yashiro-san is probably waiting for you in the Love Me section. I would like to stay myself but I have a job as well."

"Yashiro-san isn't going to be with you today?" Despite the uneasiness in my stomach, I don't want to leave him yet.

"You'll need a ride later, to get to TBM. I'll pick you up from there." Apprehension grips me as I think of him showing up early to look for me and running into Bo. It would be easier to tell him, as Kanae said. "Have a nice day, and enjoy your present."

"Hm?" I frown at him, confused but take the hint to get out of the car and head up to meet Yashiro-san. He is siting patiently in the Love Me room with a box from LaLa Bell, my favorite bakery. "This was the errand he sent you on?" I ask without thinking.

"Yes, Ren sent me to get you a present. How did you know?" With a blank stare, I sit down and silently accept the box. It would be okay to tell him that Tsuruga-san dropped me off, right? It isn't as if it was only me who received a ride from him. Most likely sensing that I do not plan on answering him, he pulls out the black book he is constantly scribbling things in and begins to go over my schedule for the day. "And you have a meeting with a casting director for a drama that is in the works for next year, after that I will drive you over to TBM. I'll have to go and pick up the scripts for the next Arata perfume cm, but I will be back to pick you up when you're done."

"Oh, um, I sort of already have a ride home." He scrunches his face but pencils it in without question.

A good manager doesn't pry too much, he would say if I asked. But I can see straight through him, he's dying to know the truth. The gears in his head are turning and I can already guess that he'll be messaging Tsuruga-san before the end of the day to ask if he's the one driving me home.

 **A/N: Thank you so much for the reviews and follows, though I can't answer any of your questions except to say that Bo will make a brief appearance in the next chapter. I hope you liked this chapter, let me know if you spot any mistakes or issues. Thank You all again for spending your time reading this.**


	10. Chicken Heart

This is exactly what I did not want to happen. There I was blissfully believing that I was safe, when that giant, unfairly attractive man walked around the corner. It's too much for me to bear, I slam my head against the wall begging for a concussion. I would run but he's already spotted me.

"At least I've found a familiar face." Tsuruga-san says once he is close enough for us to hear. I look over at the man beside me, suddenly remembering that we had been about to go get a snack for my three co-workers.

"Tsuruga Ren!" Hikaru-san bows politely, if not a little stiffly. "Wow, I see celebrities so often, I'm surprised I can be this star struck. It's a little embarrassing to be honest."

Tsuruga-san bows back only paying partial attention to Hikaru-san. "I'm sorry if I'm interrupting but I was looking for my girlfriend. Could I borrow the chicken to help me?"

No. I glare at him not wanting to go anywhere alone with him. Why hadn't I ditched the costume before agreeing to go get the food? Stupid! Stupid!

"Are you alright?" Large hands grasp the head of my chicken suit, stopping me from hitting it into the wall. Even with the thick padding of the head, the heat from his skin causes me to tremble.

"Don't worry about Bo, she's always like that." My breath hitches in my throat hearing Hikaru-san label me a girl. The only reason I am not already killing him is because he had the sense to not call me by my real name. That and Tsuruga-san doesn't seem to notice the slip. "Oh, but I guess you would already know that. Since she appeared in daffmmn…" With my wing over his mouth he cannot finish his sentence.

"Hikaru-san, you should go get that snack before Shinichi-san and Yuusei-san, come to find out what's taking so long." I shove him a little too roughly then I grasp onto Tsuruga-san and drag him over to a bench nearby. "So, you lost your girlfriend. Come sit over here and I'll go find her for you." I'm being rude, but I don't care, this is his fault for stressing me out. Or my fault for not telling him the truth, but I'm going to blame him because I'm annoyed.

"Well she's technically not my girlfriend. Not yet anyway." He admits refusing to budge when I try to push him down on the bench. Damn him and his muscles. Firm, strong muscles that feel so good beneath my fingers. "I owe you. If it wasn't for you, I would have never gained the courage to ask her out. I wouldn't have even realized that I'm in love with her without your help."

"Hey, are you listening to me?" His hands are on me again, shaking my shoulders. My thoughts had been preoccupied with thoughts of his broad shoulders. "You're not overheating in there, are you?" His fingers slip under the head and begin to pull up. "Filming is over, right. You don't have to keep the costume on to talk to me."

"No!" Flapping my wings, I jump away from him and shove my head back down.

Hands raised in a gesture of peace, he backs down. "Alright, keep it on." He pulls out his phone checking the time. "You must really like this job, I've never seen you without the costume. Not even the head."

"Yeah, I guess I do." I laugh patting my head to make sure it's secure. "Can I ask you a question?"  
"Of course." He shows me a genuine smile, and I can't help the pang of jealousy that courses through me. That's my smile, stop showing it to some unknown girl in a chicken suit, Tsuruga-san. I shake the thought out of my head, realizing how stupid it is.

"You said that she isn't your girlfriend yet. Is that because you're waiting for someone else? Is she not the girl you truly love?"

"I love, Kyouko." He says too easily and my throat tightens. This fool goes around telling people that with that warm smile on his face, he is such a playboy. "She isn't my girlfriend yet, because I don't want her to feel pressured. Her ex treated her like a maid and I don't want her to think that's what I want. I don't want her to stop everything she's doing to take care of me and make me lunch or clean my house while I work."

"I wouldn't think that." I slip earning a confused look from him. "I mean, I'm sure she wouldn't think that someone of your status who could hire a maid, would want her to quit her job to take care of you. On a side note I thought you said you liked her cooking."

"I do, but there's nothing I can do to return the favor. She's so good to me, but she won't let me buy her things, and money is all I really have. It's like I won the jackpot, and got this amazing girl while she's stuck with me." I struggle not to laugh. This isn't funny. My boyfriend is acting insecure in front of me, who he thinks is some random girl in a chicken suit, worried that he isn't enough for me. Doesn't he know he's Tsuruga Ren, the most wanted man in Japan? He should be more worried about what will happen if someone catches him with such a plain and boring girl like me.

"You know you're gorgeous, right?"

"Yeah, and rich, and famous, and really good at my job." I don't quite understand the look on his face. There's a sadness to it that is bitter and hopeless. "She really admires me. I'm her senpai, she doesn't question my twisted illogical explanations and she believes my lies so easily."

"Lies?" Now it really isn't funny.

"She's a little naive and gullible. I feel bad for lying because that's something _he_ seems to have done often, but I tell myself it's different. I don't lie about where I'll be or how I feel about her. I mostly tell her stories to make her happy, and of course there are things that I can't tell anybody." He sits up straighter suddenly and looks at me. "I shouldn't be saying any of this to you. I'm going to try calling, Kyouko again. If you'll excuse me."

"Kyouko-chan? Why are you looking for her when she's right…" Releasing a deafening squawk, I leap into the air and slam Hikaru to the floor.

There really is no reason to be going this far. It would be better to just tell Tsuruga-san the truth, but then what if he hates me for sneaking around like this. I've listened to some of his deepest secrets without him knowing. I've mocked him and told him I hated him and I am the one who convinced him that what he feels for me is love. He could conclude that I had lied to him about what love is, just so I could have him for myself. He could decide that he doesn't love me. I'm not planning to continue to pretend to be someone else so I can pry more into his mind and find out what he's lying to me about. If we happen to meet again like this, though, I might ask him to elaborate on it. So that I can help him with his girl troubles, even if that's a little messed up.

"Is your Kyouko-chan a short girl with chestnut hair and light brown eyes?" I ask quickly jumping off Hikaru-san and turning a bright beaming face towards Tsuruga-san.

"Yeah she's kind of tiny and cute, and her eyes are like honey. I could look in them all day." I roll my eyes. How am I supposed to believe anything he says now?

"You're dating Kyouko-chan?" Hikaru-san asks recovering from my body slam attack. His snacks are smashed but still edible, so I don't feel too bad when he fixes me with an annoyed if not slightly confused look.

Tsuruga-san places a finger to his lips. "If you could keep that a secret I'd appreciate it. Since she's so young and new, it might not be good for her image." My image or you're reputation? I'm so irritated now, other than his real name what don't I know? What has he told me that wasn't true. Was anything the truth? Tsuruga-san!

"Don't worry I can keep a secret, if I'm asked." Hikaru-san's pointed glare shoots through me. "If you wait here, Bo and I can go get her for you. She sometimes runs errands for our show."

"Really? Take me to her please." The eager eyes of a child momentarily renders us speechless. Tsuruga-san needs to stop showing that face to people other than me. I sulk forgetting that I'm angry at him.

Hikaru-san motions for Tsuruga-san to sit back down. "She often runs around to different places and can be very difficult to track down. It would be easier for us if you wait here. So we don't end up having to hunt down both of you."

"Leave it to us. We'll go find your girl." I enthusiastically agree, pushing Tsuruga-san down on the bench and rushing off with Hikaru-san to retrieve myself.

"Tsuruga Ren?" Hikaru-san asks after I have finished putting the Bo costume away. "He's your," he doesn't seem physically able to finish his sentence.

"I guess it really was your height." Yuusei-san comments petting Hikaru-san on the head.

"Isn't he a little too glamorous for our little Kyouko-chan?" Shinichi-san asks. "Don't you think Hikaru is more suited to you, Kyouko-chan?" Hikaru-san blushes and I shake my head at their antics.

"You don't want him to know about Bo?" Hikaru-san asks.

I shake my head more vigorously. "It would be too embarrassing. You guys won't tell him, will you?" I fold my hands together and pout up at them. "Please."

Grinning wickedly Yuusei-san nods his head. "Of course, we'll keep your secret. So long as you go on a date with one of us. We'll keep that from your friend Tsuruga too."

"Ignore him." Hikaru-san brushes Yuusei-san off and begins to walk away. "We should get you to your boyfriend before he comes looking for you."

"Right!" I skip along beside him, suddenly happy to see Tsuruga-san, now that I'm out of danger of being discovered as Bo. Yuusei-san and Shinichi-san follow us closely, sulking that their attempt to tease me was thwarted by their leader.

"You know," Hikaru-san starts before we make it to my handsome actor. "If he really cares about you, it shouldn't matter what your role is here. If you can't trust him to not judge you for this then maybe you shouldn't be dating him." He grasps my wrist stopping me in my tracks. "I wouldn't mind dating you, even in the chicken costume."

"Yeah, Kyouko-chan, you and Hikaru would make the cutest couple." Shinichi says excitedly.

A dark shadow is suddenly cast over us and Hikaru-san's hand is pushed away. "You don't touch." Cold and dark, his voice sends shivers up my spine as he places his hands on my waist and lifts me up to his level. "Where have you been? I missed you." He doesn't hesitate or give me time to react before crushing his mouth to mine. I moan into the kiss, suddenly made aware of every inch of my own heated body.

"Tsuruga-san, we're in public." It takes all my inner strength as a pure hearted maiden to push his face away. "Put me down." He obeys my command, setting me down slowly with our bodies pressed together. The heat in me pools in the pit of my stomach, despite my internal attempts to make it go away. "I swear sometimes I don't know what I'm going to do with you. You should know better than to act this way in public." I scold him to distract myself from the bizarre sensations my body is forcing on me.

"Stay the night at my place, and I'll show you exactly what you can do with me. Ow!" I shove his face away to keep him from whispering in my ear.

"Quiet, what if they heard you?" I ask, reminding myself of our present company.

"Maybe I wanted them to hear me." Tsuruga-san shrugs. The murderous glint is his eyes as he looks over my head at the Ishibashi brothers is more than enough to shock the carnal thoughts out of my body.

"I'm hungry." I announce, counting on his need to take care of me being stronger than his need to murder whichever one of them offended him. I suspect it was Hikaru-san for touching me.

"I bet. Kyouko-chan hasn't eaten anything all night." Yuusei sneers. "I hope she's not trying to lose weight just to please somebody."

Why are you trying to pick a fight? Don't you know he's scary when mad? I want to scream at them to not provoke him.

"I should take you out for a feast then." Tsuruga-san squeezes me tight and rubs his face against my hair. "I can't let my princess starve." He's angry, but instead of attacking them he seems determined to make me as uncomfortable as possible.

"Don't be ridiculous, I'll make us dinner." I say glad that he isn't throwing any punches at least.

"I can't let you cook after you've worked all day." He turns his false smile to the Ishibashi brothers. "What kind of boyfriend would that make me?"

"But I like cooking for you." I say touching his cheek to bring his attention back to me. "Because you're good to me and I want to return the favor." I bite my lip hoping he doesn't realize that my words are similar to what he had said to Bo.

A genuine smile brings the blush back to my face. "That's good, because I like your cooking." Before we go he turns and bows to them. "Thank you for helping me find my girl." I roll my eyes as he puts too much emphases on the words, my girl.

I bow to my co-workers as well. "I'll be going now." I bring a finger to my mouth. "Please keep this a secret."

It isn't until we get to the car that I remember I'm supposed to be mad at him. But the anger doesn't come. When I think of him hiding something from me, it makes me sad. How can he claim to love me but admit to lying to me? I think of asking Kanae but I know she'll just bring up my own lie. Is hiding my identity as Bo really any different from whatever he's hiding?

"You're quiet tonight." He mentions as I am busy preparing our meal. "Are you tired. It's not too late for me to order something."

 _money is all I really have._ His eyes scream that he honestly believes that and were he not a liar I'd feel bad for ignoring him. Strong arms surround my shoulders and my body betrays me by leaning back into him. His warmth is addictive. It soothes me and makes me want to believe in him. Maybe I could wait to learn what he's hiding before I decide whether to be mad about it or not.

"I'm not tired." I say leaning up and kissing his chin. Shocked he looks down at me and smiles. "If you want to help me, though, I'd appreciate it. You can set the table." He kisses my forehead before obeying my request.

 _I love Kyouko._ That wasn't a lie as least.

 **A/N: Thanks for the reviews and favorites and follows. I really hope you liked this chapter.**


	11. I wanna Feel You

Something is wrong with my manager. When he picked me up this morning his fingers were gripping the steering wheel so hard that they turned white. There have been no comments about his other charge, and he has asked no questions about who I've been texting between takes all day either. Now he seems to be avoiding eye contact with me.

 _You haven't said anything to Yashiro-san, have you?_ I send the text and catch the normally professional man hiding a giggle. Then, his face falls into horror as he thinks of something.

 _About?_ I read the reply and wonder if he's planning on messing with me.

 _Us._ I send back, taking the chance that he'll behave himself.

 _What about us?_ He seriously gets too much pleasure out of irritating me.

 _Ren, please tell me if you said something to Yoshiro-san. He's acting strange._

 _When isn't he?_ He has a point. Our manager is a strange mix of consummate professional and excitable fangirl of a relationship he doesn't even know exists yet.

 _Stranger than usual._

 _Should you be calling other people strange?_ I can just imagine his stupid handsome face smirking down at the phone. He showed me the other day that he can assign a picture of me as the background of our text conversations. So, he can stare at me while he's teasing me. _How many times a day do you get lost in a fantasy world?_

 _You said you liked my imagination._ I shoot back.

After a moment, my phone vibrates. _Are you coming over tonight?_

 _Don't change the subject!_ I add an annoyed emoji and then hide the phone in my pocket as Yashiro-san walks over to me. "Yashiro-san, is something the matter? You seem rather out of it today." I smile brightly at him.

Oddly enough, he reacts by blushing and then shaking his head while whispering, "Ren's going to kill me."

"Yashiro-san?" My phone buzzes excitedly against my leg. "Excuse me." He waves me away a look of dread in his eyes. "Hello?"

"You didn't reply to my texts." Comes the accusatory voice.

"Yes, I'm coming over tonight. To go over our scripts for the CM and make sure you eat at least one proper meal today. Yashiro-san tells me when you skip meals you know, and you have skipped four this week." There is a sigh on the other end. "His behavior is becoming stranger by the way. Apparently, he thinks you're going to kill him."

"Why would I do something like that?" I shrug, looking up at the man in question. He's reading something and shaking his head while muttering to himself. "It's probably nothing. I haven't told him anything about our little dates; so maybe he's frustrated that none of his scheming is working."

"Or he's thought up some other way to force us together," I counter, checking the texts he sent me to find that he still hasn't grasped the meaning of any emoji other than the heart.

"That could be beneficial to us. It'll make me happy to be forced to see you more often." The sound of someone calling for him seeps through the phone. "I have to get back to work. I'll pick you up from the office. Don't forget to get the scripts from our strange manager."

"I won't." I move to hang up but he calls to me.

"Mogami-san?"

"Yes?" There is a curious pause and I check the phone to be sure we're still connected. "Tsuruga-san, was there something else?"

He sighs into the phone. "I love you." I fight the color that I know is seeping into my cheeks. We are silent for another moment before he speaks again in a soft, slightly detached tone. "I should go now."

"Bye." With his usual fangirl eyes the bespectacled manager skips over to me. His giddiness is not a welcome return of his normal self. I want my responsible manager, not love monster number two.

"Was that Ren?" As soon as his question leaves his lips he turns a deep shade of red. Clearing his throat, he makes an effort to stand up straighter. "You have an interview; then I will drop you off to do Love Me work. You'll have this to read until Ren picks you up." He shivers as he pulls out what he had been reading earlier. It is the script for our next commercial. Somehow the fear in his eyes causes me to shake as I reach for the inoffensive packet of papers. "No!" He hides it behind his back. "I don't want you reading this in the car. You should rest your eyes while I drive and I will give this to you later. Read it later. Later. After I've dropped you off."

"Okay." I pull my hands away finding his insistence more than a little disturbing.

As I wait for him to bring the car around, I catch a glimpse of my past self. Mimori and Shoutaro are heading my way and Mimori looks every bit as pathetic as I used to. Her arms cling to him as she pouts prettily, but his eyes are intent on me.

"I have a question to ask you," Shoutaro informs me once close enough for me to hear, but not so close that Mimori would complain.

"Sorry, any request for an interview has to be placed with my manager." I don't bother to look at him as I speak. The aura of hostility coming off him is too much for me to bear. He's annoyed with Mimori, he's annoyed with me, but the only one he plans to take it out on is me. The perks of being his ex-childhood friend.

"Then it's true. You did sell yourself to that talentless giant to gain fame quickly." Glossy paper slaps against my face. I catch the magazine on reflex and stare down at several photos of myself and Tsuruga-san looking dangerously happy together.

"This never happened, it's two separate pictures spliced together. These are from the set of Dark Moon, we're acting and I have a knife to his throat. That's _so_ romantic. This one here is from the set of our CM for perfume, and look, another one that someone did a poor job of photoshopping together. The backgrounds are different Shoutaro, honestly don't believe everything you see." Yashiro-san warned me about the photo editing monsters. He even told me about the tabloids who take images from things I've appeared in and plaster a fake story to them. "As a fellow celebrity, I would expect you to know their tricks."

"Then why is that talentless hack's stupid manager driving you around?" Plastering a sweet smile on my face I catch him off guard before delivering a swift kick to his shin.

"Insult either of them again, and I will be forced to publicly reveal certain information about you that I'm sure you'd rather keep private. Need I remind you that I know all sorts of embarrassing details about you? Maybe the next gossip magazine will have a five-page spread about your real name, and I can ask your mom to send me that picture of you that you hate. You know, the one where you're wearing the outfit from your grandmother." He growls at me just as Yashiro-san pulls up, and I nod a curt goodbye to them. "Shoutaro, Mimori-san." My manager makes a face out the window at the two and I stifle a giggle.

"I don't doubt that Shoko-san is good at her job, but sometimes I wonder how she can allow that boy to walk around harassing people," he grumbles as he drives.

"Speaking from experience, the only way to get him to listen is with brute force or manipulation. Poor Shoko-san must be exhausted from coming up with ways to trick that idiot into staying put." We share a smile and then fall into a comfortable silence.

Close to the end of the day, as Yashiro-san leaves me at the LME office, he offers me the scripts and looks as if he's just foreseen his own death. "Please don't hate me. I honestly didn't know how bad it would be. Please don't let Ren kill me, Kyouko-chan."

"…" I take the scripts, wanting to ask what he did that could be bad enough to anger both Tsuruga-san and myself, but Yashiro-san takes off before I can open my mouth. "Okay?" I wander to the Love Me office and sit down to peruse the script. If anyone needs me they can come find me, I am far too curious about the unexpected behavior.

Mouth wide in shock, cheeks blazing with mortificationm I drop the script. "Who does that at the beach?" For a moment, my mind wanders to our previous commercial. Ren's hard chest had felt so warm and smooth beneath my fingers.

"Does what?" I squeak, fumbling to cover the script. The fear that my naughty imaginings have been discovered settles into my stomach replacing the tingling warmth. "What's that?"

Kanae takes the seat beside me and I look around suddenly remembering where I am. A delicate hand reaches for the second script, meant for Tsuruga-san.

"That's Tsuruga-san's!" I yank the script away and tuck it under mine with my arm resting over them.

"Alright." Kanae holds her hands up in defense. It takes me a moment to notice that I am emitting a murderous aura, and I have to calm myself down. There is no way I can let her see these scripts.

"I should go, uh, see if Sawara-san has any Love Me work or job offers for me." I make up an excuse while shoving the scripts into my bag. If Sawara-san had either of those for me, he would have called or sent someone to this room to tell me. Unfortunately for me Kanae knows that.

"I'll see it when it airs on TV you know." She says, causing me to bang my head on the door. I forgot about that. "Let me see, it's probably not that bad."

"Moko-san, it's the _worst_." She holds out her hand for one of the scripts and I give in, wanting her advice.

Kanae takes a seat and flips through the script. "Hmm." She nods her head, acting as if the words do not bother her, but the glowing blush on her face gives her away. "Well good luck with that."

I drop my jaw as she jumps out of her seat and tosses the script to me. "Moko-san!"

"Ask your boyfriend to help you." I freeze at her words, suddenly remembering that Tsuruga-san is picking me up soon. Kanae softens her expression and pats my head. "I'm sure he'll be a gentleman about it." I nod, cursing Yashiro-san for accepting this job for the both of us.

By the time Tsuruga-san picks me up I have calmed down, due to focusing my energy on being angry rather than nervous. Besides, I am almost certain that he will have a solution to our problem, like using his fame to convince them to change the script. I sit on his couch and present the script to him, waiting for his outrage and humiliation but it never comes.

"It seems easy enough." He shrugs after he is finished reading. Sometimes I wonder if he is even Japanese. Shouldn't he be appalled by what Fujita-san expects us to do, and in front of other people too?

"Maybe for you!" I huff, dropping the script onto his table. "I can't do any of that. It wouldn't be right."

Tsuruga-san sets his script on the table with mine. "I know, you've never done this before, but it's our job. I do scene's like this all the time. They aren't very different from normal scenes, you just act your way through it"

"It isn't proper. It's indecent and I won't do it." I cross my arms, glaring at him. How can he be calm about this? The script calls for him to do things to me for the camera that we haven't even done in private.

"You agreed to do this commercial. Be professional about it and we'll be done in no time." He says standing up and heading to the kitchen. "I think I'll have some tea. Would you like some?" I pout, ignoring his handsome smile and picking my script back up.

 _Scents: sweet seduction and sweet submission_

 _Location: Shirahama Ohama Beach_

 _Kyouko: in a flowing white and blue cover up and white bikini – stands on the beach looking out at the water_

 _Ren: in a white speedo emerges from the water and walks towards Kyouko_

This part I am fine with. In fact, I think I'll prefer the long cover up to the one they had me in before, which covered up next to nothing. When I imagine Ren coming out of the water and walking to me I swoon. His chest will glisten with water and though I am not particularly fond of speedos, I bet Tsuruga-san would look amazing in one. Though, he could make a suit made of cardboard look fashionable. There is something nostalgic about the image of him emerging from the water. I shake the thought and continue reading the script again in disbelief.

Tsuruga-san will walk out of the water towards me. It will be exactly like the last commercial where he attempts to steal kisses, only this time he will be less playful about it. My character will be less reluctant to give in. All I need to do is let him seduce me. I continue reading past the initial kiss and my eyes widen as the characters continue to make out on the beach.

 _Kyouko: Still shy but completely enraptured by the handsome man allows herself to be lowered to the sand._

No matter how many times I read the words they make me squirm. I cannot think of this girl, spreading her legs wide enough to accommodate the hips of a grown man, as me. Nor can I imagine Tsuruga-san's hands gripping my thighs as he kisses down my throat.

"Who does this on a beach?" I gasp, staring at the direction for the skirt of the dress to be pushed up. That means that we will not only be kissing and embracing on the ground, but also that his hands will be touching my bare thighs. His large, warm hands will slip under my skirt. My thighs will cradle him between them, and he'll run his tongue over my skin. My fingers shake with the want to touch his moist skin as I read the script, losing myself to my thoughts.

 _Kyouko: head thrown back submits herself completely to his seduction_

"No, I can't do that!" The script vanishes from my hands and is replaced by a cup of tea. It's a new cup, white with gold trim and a fairy tale scene painted on it. It's the ballroom scene from Beauty and the Beast. Ren's cup is similar, only his depicts the library. "How much?" I ask taking a sip from my new cup.

With a maddening shrug, he replies. "Enough to satisfy my need to spoil, but not so much that you would complain."

"How much?" I ask again, infusing my voice with more gravity.

"I'll tell you if you pay the price." He touches his mouth, indicating what the price is. I drink my tea silently, pretending that I didn't hear him. "Mogami-san?" His nose grazes my cheek, followed by his lips in a chaste kiss. "Don't you want to know?"

I turn to him slightly, then with a sweet smile I shrug my shoulders. I was hoping that it would irritate him, but it makes him laugh instead. Annoyed, I down the rest of my tea, ignoring the slight pain from it not being as cool as I would have liked. I set the cup down carefully and grab the script off the table. Tsuruga-san pulls it out of my hands again and tosses it carelessly behind the couch.

"Hey!" I make a move to retrieve it, but he captures me and pushes me down. "I was reading that." I glare up at him. "We're supposed to be going over it, not playing around."

I can feel the heat of his hands through my jeans as they push my thighs apart. He settles himself between my legs and I squeeze my eyes shut, desperate to block out the flood of emotions his actions are stirring in me. My hands push against him when I feel his breath on my face.

"Stop messing around." I tremble, he's too close.

"This is what we have to do in the commercial. You're failing at it. Look at me." His stern yet gentle voice makes me quiver with excitement. A dangerous sense of obedience threatens to take over my mind. I would do whatever that voice commands me to.

Cautiously I open one eye. He is smiling down at me, the picture of patience. "I don't think I like this position very much," I tell him, unable to think of anything besides his hips resting in the valley between my thighs.

Chuckling, he grips my chin and forces me to look at him. "I like it, but I wouldn't mind it if you preferred to be on top." The Emperor steals my breath away with his words. Then like a switch being flipped, Tsuruga-san falls into teaching mode. "When shooting scenes like this, it is important to remember that everybody feels just as awkward about it as you do. Apart from people with voyeuristic tendencies, no one there will want to linger too long on any one scene. I can tell you from experience that there is nothing se…romantic about doing this surrounded by cameras, and the director screaming orders, and a barricaded audience of nosy beach goers."

My eyes go wide with the additional information that there will be a crowd of people gathered. It's a public beach and we probably only have a portion of it rented out. That means that fans of Tsuruga-san might show up to catch a glimpse of him, and they'll see me looking like, well me, next to him looking like a sex god. Whatever fame I have gained as Natsu and Mio will be lost due to my unattractive face and lack of feminine curves.

"You're so adorable when your mind wanders." His fingers trace a soft path down the side of my face to my jaw. "Were you thinking about me?"

"No!" The amusement does not vanish from his expression but for the briefest instant I imagine that he is saddened by my exclamation. "I was thinking about the commercial."

"There isn't much to think about. Just," returning one hand to my thigh and snaking the other around the back of my neck he kneads my flesh. It feels good, eliciting a moan from me and causing me to throw my head back. "Do that, and you'll be fine."

"Tsuruga-san, I," I what? What do I want from him? The uninvited answers springs to my mind, I want his hand to travel upward and reach inside of me. I want him to ravish my lips and teach me things that I never dreamed of before. "Get off me!" My words come out harsh, filled with revulsion for my own impure thoughts. Here he is trying to teach me and I am allowing my mind to wander to shameless things.

He obeys instantly, scurrying off me as if I have burned him. "I'm sorry." Suddenly bashful he turns away from me, breathing out a deep sigh.

"I," there is nothing for me to say. I cannot explain to him why he shouldn't touch me. I couldn't bear it if he came to think of me as one of those loose women who throw themselves at him all the time. He doesn't have to tell me, for me to know that he can't stand those women. The flirts with nothing but wanton thoughts, who see only the pretty face and muscled body, are not what he wants. "I should start supper."

"You don't have to cook every time you come over." He sounds angry, and I fear he might have read my thoughts, as he so often does. I'm afraid that someday he will see me for the wicked girl I am and leave me. The girl who was unloved even by her own mother.

"I like cooking for you."

"Yes, I know." Releasing another sigh, he sits on the couch I have vacated. "Get to it then, if you must." He waves me away in a way that makes me feel inferior. I would stay and fight with him about his sudden dismissive air, but I need to be away from him. I need to clear my head of him and my body.

In the kitchen, I pull out the vegetables and rice. along with an expensive cut of beef. Tsuruga-san has taken to doing the shopping without me, so that I cannot protest to the frivolous amount of money he spends on groceries. If I argue with him about it I know he will only tell me to be happy that he bothers to buy food at all. I know that he only does it to make me happy. He does so many things to make me happy. Recalling the conversation, he had with my chicken counterpart I wonder how he can believe that it is him who is the lucky one. How can an impure girl like me ever hope to deserve someone as good as him?

A tender hand touches my back lightly, but it is gone so quickly I wonder if it was a ghost.

"Can I help?" Even edged with bitterness Tsuruga-san's voice washes over me and creates a heat beneath my skin. Determined to be the innocent and decent girl he loves I allow the smile caused by his presence to emerge.

"Yes, of course." I hand him the vegetables. "You can wash and prep these for the stew. I'll start the rice and the meat. Then, if you could set the table for me, I'd appreciate that."

My smile seems to melt away his frustration, for he returns it in kind. His hand glides over my hair and he brings my head forward slightly to place a brief kiss to it.

"Thank you." I do not know what he is thankful for, but I am glad that he doesn't appear to have discovered my filthy thoughts. It is another secret that will weigh heavily on me.

 **A/N: Thank you unicornforcewinds for agreeing to Beta for me.**

 **Sorry that this chapter took so long, I'll try to get the next one out faster.**


	12. Distance

I must have done something very bad in a past life. What other reason could there be for me to receive this torment? The feeling of her body beneath me is like heaven, and I don't know why I ever thought I'd be able to concentrate on work with her moaning beneath me. Somehow, it had been easier when we were alone, maybe because I was teasing her and she had her guard up. I was focused on making her believe that filming the scene would be no big deal. Now, with all these people around, she is surprisingly calm. I, on the other hand, keep losing control of my face, because my mind is preoccupied with trying to control my body. Of course, I am also acutely aware of the hungry eyes devouring her body. Though obvious to everyone else, she's completely oblivious of her appeal.

"Cut! Tsuruga-san stop glaring," Director Fujita barks at me, as I inhale in a deep, calming breath. "Push her cover up a little more and push her legs wider."

"It's all right Tsuruga-san. Like you said, we're professionals, and this is no different than acting out any other role." Her words are like a dagger to my heart. How can she be this calm with me on top of her in front, of all these people? At my apartment, she was freaked out when all I did was rub her neck; here I am kissing her lips and licking her throat, and she's not even blushing. I stare at her, trying to decipher the meaning behind her sudden indifference to my closeness. "What?"

"Nothing. You're right, we are actors, and this is nothing." The pain in my heart sharpens, having admitted to myself that what we're doing is not real.

"We'll start from you pushing up her cover up," Fujita instructs, after she's finished reviewing the footage we've already filmed. "More feeling, Tsuruga-san, pay attention to her, instead of the men staring at her. Kyouko-chan, you're doing good, just try to be more aware of your face. We can't have you looking too erotic. This is a CM, not a porno."

"Y…yes!" It's pathetic how jealous I get when she blushes. Fujita brought that color to her cheeks, not me.

"Good." Fujita-san waits for us to get into position. I pull Kyouko's skirt down and sit back on my heels. "I expect this to be our take."

"Yes." We both agree, and she signals for us to begin.

Slowly I trail my hands from her ankles to her knees, mindful of the camera, and ignoring the eager eyes feasting on her skin as I push the flimsy material up. I make eye contact, switching the position of my hands so I can grip the inside of her thighs and spread her legs apart. Kyouko is the very image of trust and submission, and it breaks my heart. That expression is all for the camera, for the audience. I continue up her legs, shoving the cloth up over her hips perhaps a little too roughly, but Fujita-san doesn't call cut. My lips find her neck as I settle my hips between her thighs. I pay as little attention as I can to the way her body molds against mine, arching into me as Kyouko gasps in pleasure. I trail kisses up her throat to her ear and bite harder than I should, but the jerk of her hips against mine, and the press of her nails in my arms, feels too good to regret my actions.

Before Fujita-san calls cut, I breath into Kyouko's ear, "relax, we're almost done." She takes a slow heavy breath, controlling the sultry expression on her face. I kiss along her jaw and up to her lips, where we breath in each other's breath but do not kiss. Kyouko throws her head back in ecstasy and I push against her thighs, angling my upper body to give the camera an unobstructed view of our hips joined together; making it appear as if we are doing more than we are.

"Cut!" Fujita-san yells. "Good, now we just need to shoot Tsuruga-san emerging from the water, and I've reviewed your little make out before falling to the sand in passion and decided we need to film it again." Kyouko lets out a squeak, probably not wanting to kiss me again. How can I call her my girlfriend when she hates kissing me? Fujita-san laughs. "And there's the reason why, Kyouko-chan, you're still too timid when he kisses you. I don't want a porn kiss, but at least look more... I mean, you do look like you're enjoying it, but it's almost a guilty kind of uneasiness showing through your expression."

"I'm sorry."

Irritated, Fujita-san asks, "What have you got to be sorry about? This scene was beautiful, almost too erotic for us to air on television, but that's what editing is for." She waves her hands flippantly at us. "You both seem more relaxed now, so bring that to the kiss. Be intoxicated by his presence and let him lead you."

"Yes, Fujita-san." Kyouko attempts to bow her head, forgetting that I am still on top of her. Our foreheads collide with a painful thud, and I hear a distinctly familiar chuckle coming from our manager's direction as I sit up rubbing my head.

"Break for lunch and make sure there's no swelling." Fujita-san dismisses us, not bothering to hide her amusement.

"You okay?" I ask, rising to my feet and reaching out a hand to help her up. She accepts it, but drops it as soon as she's on her feet.

"I'm sorry." She bows to me, one hand still massaging her head.

Yashiro-san approaches us with his peace offering of two very cold bottles of water. He's still convinced that I'm angry about this overly sexual commercial. It's hardly the first CM like this I've filmed; honestly, they all seem the same after a while. Of course, the girl I love wasn't in the others with me.

"Thank you," I acknowledge, accepting both bottles, as Kyouko remains mid-bow. "Mogami-san..." She peers up at me, and I press the beverage to her forehead. In an effort to east the mild ache, I do the same to myself with my own.

"Th…thanks…" Her hands touch mine momentarily, before she rips it away as if I'm diseased. "I brought us all lunch, if you want to eat now." Her words are directed at Yashiro, I'm not allowed to have a say when it comes to food.

"You're so sweet, Kyouko-chan." Yashiro nods his agreement, and we follow her to the cooler she brought this morning.

I groan inwardly at the size of the bento she hands to him, but she thankfully gives me a smaller one. Is it because I've been good lately, or is she mad at me? I can't keep up with her moods. Inside the box, my lunch is the same simple leftovers she always packs. It's not that I expect heart shapes and love notes, but I still catch myself hoping for them.

"By the way, I forgot to tell you that there's a rumor going around," Yashiro-san informs us, ignoring my glare. I don't care for gossip, and I care even less for his giddy smile. "Those awful tabloids have been sneaking onto sets again, and they somehow have pictures of the two of you from your previous commercial. It's not much to worry about because the only magazines that do this are completely disreputable, but we should still be more careful of our surroundings." His voice is measured enough that I am momentarily fooled, at least until he adds, "I've already cut out all my favorite pictures and made a collage. Would either of you like a copy?" He's holding up his artwork proudly and pointing at a picture of Kyouko blushing. I'm pretty sure these pictures aren't all from the magazines.

"Yashiro-san, if the media were to find out that you made this, it would only cause confusion. I'm surprised a manager as smart as you are would risk something so troublesome." Kyouko gathers the pages and shoves them back into his satchel, causing our highly respected manager to pout.

"Yukihito, please remember that we are in public. At least attempt to appear as the competent manager we know you to be." His responding whine is even more childish than the pout.

"You are both hopeless and stupid." Yashiro sulks. I stab at my food, somehow annoyed that I don't have more than I could finish. She didn't even blush about the doctored photos. Of course, I shouldn't be bothered by that, since both Yashiro and I told her not to worry about them.

"I'm finished, I think I'll go over to make up and have them give me a touch up. Mogami-san, you should do the same when you're done." She barely looks my way as she nods.

Isn't that a bit rude of you, Kyouko? I want to grab her hand and drag her to some secluded place, but I'm afraid of what I might do to her once we get there. All I want is to ask her about her behavior, but I know that being this annoyed wouldn't bode well for my pure girlfriend. I want to force her to look at me, and make her blush as I do things to her body she's probably never even thought about. I walk to the tent set up for our hair and make-up, looking back before entering, to see Kyouko laughing at whatever Yashiro has just said.

"Tsuruga-san, how can I help you?" One of the make-up artists inside invites me in. I bow and take the seat she gestures to.

"I just want to be sure that I still look alright." She blushes when I smile at her, and I wonder why Kyouko can't react like that. It would be nice if she responded to me like a normal girl for once.

"I'm sure you don't have to worry about that." No, even Kyouko thinks I'm good looking. Not that it matters, since she doesn't care about looks. "Tsuruga-san is the most handsome celebrity I have ever seen, and I've seen a lot. Though I have heard that you don't date, is there a reason for that?"

"Tsuruga-san is too focused on his career to concern himself with loose women." Kyouko informs her, entering the tent. I tell myself not to get excited, that the annoyance seeping into her voice isn't jealousy. I don't even know why she would be jealous, the make-up artist was only making idle conversation.

"Actually, I also heard a rumor that the two of you might be a couple. Kyouko-chan, don't you think that Tsuruga-san is good looking? I think the two of you would make a cute couple." Kyoko's face doesn't show even a hint of embarrassment.

"As I said, Tsuruga-san is too focused on his career. So am I, for that matter, and what do his looks have to do with it? Of course, he's good looking, actors have to be, and he's exceptionally good at his job. That doesn't mean he'd make a good boyfriend." Don't take it to heart, she didn't call you a bad boyfriend. She merely stated that your good looks don't make you a good boyfriend. Do not make a big deal out of her words, Kuon.

"Uh... okay, well, I need to uh... go get something." The make-up artist backs out of the tent quickly, fleeing the awkward tension.

"Did you need to scare her?" I question, once I'm sure the woman is too far away to overhear.

"Did you need to flirt with her?" She shoots back, looking at her reflection in the mirror, rather than at me. "Miki-san is cute, so I guess I don't blame you, but you knew I was coming back here."

"First of all, I wasn't flirting, and second, who is Miki-san?" What is this girl talking about? She makes up so many stories in her head it's hard for me to keep track of them.

"Don't be rude, Ren. Miki-san is the make-up artist. She introduced herself right after we got changed into our outfits." I think back for a moment, to us changing into our swimsuits.

Kyouko had been instructed not to put on her cover up yet. I remember walking beside her into the tent, and watching as she sat in the chair, her makeup done by one person and hair by another. I waited patiently for my turn, and passed the time by reacquainting my eyes with every inch of flesh her rather modest bikini revealed to me.

"Yes I… forgot." My eyes wander over her figure in the cover up, deciding that this is a good look for her too. Kyouko's words click in my head and I walk over to stand behind her, a goofy smile on my face. "What did you just call me?"

Like a deer in headlights, she stares at me, unmoving, eyes growing wide. It doesn't look like she's even breathing, so I place my hands on her shoulders, and she shudders out a shaky breath.

"Nothing," she mumbles, standing up and making a move to leave the enclosed space.

"No, I'm pretty sure you said something else." I capture her against the portable salon station. "It sounded an awful lot like _Ren_." Maybe it was just a slip of the tongue, but I'll take whatever I can get.

"Don't change the subject!" She shoves against my chest, but I refuse to budge. "You were flirting with Miki-san."

"No, I wasn't. We were talking about my make-up. Wait," I pause, not quite believing it myself, "are you jealous?" I can't help the smile curving up my mouth. Leaning over her, I take her face in my hands.

"Tsuruga-san, this is inappropriate." She pushes my mouth away before I can kiss her. "Miki-san could return at any moment. You shouldn't be doing these types of things with me."

"Who else would I do them with? You're my girlfriend Kyouko, aren't you?" The blush on her neck calls to me, and I raise my hand to touch her delicate skin.

Beet-red and glaring at me, she places both hands on my chest to push me away. "Stop it, I don't want Miki-san to discover us like this." I back off, hearing people approaching the tent.

"Is being discovered your only problem, or do you not want me to do things like this at all?" She pushes me back further, and I allow myself to fall into the chair.

Miki-san and the hair stylist enter the tent, ready to fix us up, meaning I'll have to wait to ask her my question again. Once we're back at my apartment tonight, there will be no one to interrupt us.

Prepared to shoot our scenes, we head over to the waiting director. Kyouko is careful to keep her distance from me, and avoids eye contact. Things have gotten even worse than when we started filming this morning. She'd been shaking when I leaned down to kiss her, but she responded in a positive way. Now she looks absolutely terrified, and when Fujita-san calls for us to start, she jumps away from me, trembling.

"Kyouko, you're supposed to be a professional." I admonish, irritation blossoming inside me at her behavior. What did I do that was so bad? I was only teasing, and I refrained from touching her nearly as much as I'd wanted to.

Her hard expression causes me to flinch. She stands up straighter and turns to apologize to the crew. Fujita-san waves her apology off and tells us to get back to work.

"Don't call me Kyouko," she orders. I take a deep breath, trying to ignore the pain her words cause.

We get back into position for our onscreen kiss. It's acting, all of this is just us pretending to be something we're not. I cup her face and stare down at her, wondering why she agreed to date me if she hates the idea of being close to me so much.

 **A/N: I don't really watch commercials, I've always hated them. That being said I watched so many perfume cms as research and I am amazed by what is allowed to be shown. I saw one where the girl partially pulled the guys speedo down and I was just like 'o' how is that appropriate for daytime tv? Well the guy in it was really hot, in a Ren like way, which is why after watching it I decided Ren needed to wear a speedo. The actual cm in the story was based on one of the less provocative perfume cms I watched. What is with the weird voice overs in those commercials, all saying random words and quotes that have nothing to do with perfume?**


	13. Bad Thoughts

My heart is pounding so fast that I can't focus on the scene. I can't concentrate on controlling my face when he keeps slipping his tongue in my mouth. To make matters worse, my head hasn't had time to recover from my earlier mistake. Not only was I pointlessly jealous, but I also slipped and called him Ren. If I allow myself to call him by his first name, then I'm bound to continue down my sinful path. I just know I'll mess up and let myself get carried away next time we kiss in private.

"Kyouko-chan, are you ready now?" Yashiro-san sits next to me in the sand, and I look around, having forgotten where I am until I see Tsuruga-san sulking by the water. I might have shoved him off me and accused him of being a pervert while we were filming. I know it's wrong of me to treat him like this, but I can't bear to admit that it's me who's the pervert.

"I'm sorry, Yashiro-san. If we don't finish this scene soon, then we'll both be late for our next assignments." His smile is kinder than I deserve.

"They're getting ready to shoot Ren emerging from the water now. He promised to get it done in one take in order to make up the lost time. You don't have to worry Kyouko-chan, everyone here knows it's your first time." He says it so calmly, with no hint of innuendo, so why do I feel like the words sound so filthy?

"I'm sorry." I don't know what else to do besides apologize, because what he's saying is that everyone is working to accommodate my lack of talent and professionalism.

Someone runs over to whisper into Yashiro-san's ear, his eyes filling with a mischievous glint as he nods to them. He pulls me hastily to my feet, his hand around my wrist, and drags me towards the water.

"Stand here," he commands, dropping my hand, "and watch Ren. I want you to keep your eyes on him the entire time, and only think of him. Don't worry about anyone else, or what is right and wrong. Pretend it's just the two of you here." He leans in closer. "Do you hear me Kyouko-chan? It's just the two of you."

Not quite understanding him, I nod my head and obey, my eyes trained on Ren as he enters the water. He sees me, finding and holding my gaze, as he dips beneath the surface. Everything goes still while he's under the water. As he slowly rises, hair wet and glistening in the sun, my heart skips a beat. I follow the drops of water that trail down his neck, over his chest and across his toned abs. Feeling suddenly parched, I lick my lips, imagining Corn for the briefest second as Tsuruga-san walks towards me. In an instant the memory is gone, and he's suddenly right in front of me. I tilt my head to the side, confused, and he takes advantage of my dazed mental state.

Strong arms lift me slightly off the ground as warm lips press against mine. I lean in, tasting the water on them. When his soft tongue opens my mouth, I don't freak out. His lips feel too good, and I can't fight the urge to kiss him back. His skin is warm and wet beneath my fingers, and I want to lick off the tiny drops of water, following wherever their trails may lead. I'm vaguely aware that there are other people around, but with his mouth on me like this, it's easy to pretend that it's just us. Just Ren and me, and the water on his skin, making me wet. Why does that thought make my thighs twitch with excitement? I feel him lower me to the ground, never breaking the kiss, as he spreads my legs open. My thighs rub against his skin, enjoying the smooth feeling. Tsuruga-san ends the kiss, nipping at my chin and down my neck.

A splash of cold water crashes down on us, and I swear I hear him growl at director Fujita, who's holding an empty water bottle over our heads.

"Seriously, you two, I said no porn." She tosses the bottle at Tsuruga-san's head. "I liked the first part, but this should not be happening on a public beach. You're old enough to know this Tsuruga-san. Have sex with your girlfriend at home, on your own time."

"We weren't… we don't… I would never!" I stammer, earning a wry smile from Fujita-san.

"Right, you expect me to believe that you spend all that time with him and have never once even thought about having sex." She opens another bottle of water that I hadn't noticed before and dumps it out over my face. "Cool off Kyouko-chan, you're all red." She stops pouring and brings the bottle to her lips, downing the remaining liquid. "You two can get up whenever you feel like it, you know. Tsuruga-san, do you need a towel? Or maybe you'd like it if we put a tent around you."

"No, thank you." Tsuruga-san is rigid and blushing as he removes himself from me. I am left feeling cold without his touch.

"Too much self-control can be bad for you, Tsuruga-san. I'm sure you'd both be better off if you just did what you want to." He stands up, towering over her.

"I hope you're not suggesting anything inappropriate director. It's bad enough you have a teenage girl filming these types of scenes with a grown man." He offers his hand to help me up, but I feel too overwhelmed to take it. What if I get caught up in the warmth of his large palms and attack him? I push to my feet unassisted, hoping that he doesn't think me rude for not accepting his help. His hand drops to his side, and he bows to Fujita-san before walking over to Yashiro-san.

"Wow, that was a little mean of you," The director comments. "Tell me something, do you not like Tsuruga-san? No, don't answer that, I already know you do, but do you not like how he touches you? He hasn't tried to force you, has he?"

What is she talking about? "No, he'd never make anyone do something they didn't want to do." I scrunch my eyebrows, wishing she would be more clear in her meaning.

"He doesn't seem like he would, but you didn't appear to be in the best mood when the two of you came out of the tent. Miki-san said she thought the two of you were fighting when she left you alone." I told him to behave himself, and now Miki-san thinks something weird was going on between us. "Kyouko-chan, are you a virgin?"

"What!" Fujita-san seriously needs to respect professional boundaries. That is not a suitable question for a director to ask an actor, even if we are both female.

"Well, I figured as much, but it's still hard to believe. You're dating the most desirable man in Japan, after all. If he hasn't tried to coerce you into things, then why do you avoid his touch and scream that he's perverted?" She leans in too close, her eyes large with wonder. This woman isn't the slightest bit shy about _anything_. "Kyouko-chan, could it be that you actually do want Tsuruga-san to do things to you? Being so inexperienced, the slightest caress probably sends your body into overdrive, right?"

"Fujita-san, I don't know where you're getting this information from, but Tsuruga-senpai and I do not have that sort of relationship." I bite back the blush, begging Natsu to help me disguise my nerves. How could this woman see through me so easily?

"It's senpai now? Did you know that whenever I suggest that you two are close, you pretend to be more formal with him than you actually are? Honestly, it's okay, Kyouko-chan. This industry can get very lonely, and it's better to form tight bonds with the people you care about." I bow to her curtly, intending to end the conversation.

"If that's all, I have another job to get to, and Yashiro-san will be waiting for me. I apologize for causing so much trouble today, and I assure you that it won't happen again." A soft hand pets my head and I look up at her questioning. I don't really have words to describe her expression, it's tender and kind, but filled with the authority and wisdom I expect from someone her age.

"If you don't have anyone to talk to about these things, you can come to me. Though I think it would be better if you spoke to your boyfriend about how you're feeling." She smiles gently, removing her hand from my head. "I will tell you this, since it seems you don't know. It's perfectly normal to want to be touched by someone you feel a deep connection with. The feelings you get when he flirts with you are natural, and there's nothing wrong with the two of you exploring your desires, so long as it's what you _both_ want." What does she mean flirt? All he ever does is make fun of and bully me.

"Director…" I frown at her, making my discomfort clear.

She waves me away. "It's fine, you don't have to listen to me. Go catch up to your not boyfriend, and continue to pretend that you don't want to feel his hands all over your body."

I run away from her and her wicked words. Maybe she has the ability to read minds? Either way, I should stay far away from her. After changing, Yashiro-san drives me to my next location, while Tsuruga-san pretends to sleep in the back seat. He's angry with me, and I don't know how to fix it.

"I have a meeting with the president, so Ren will pick you up tonight. Please make sure he eats dinner," Yashiro-san insists.

"Uh, sorry, I can't tonight. I have plans to go out with Kotonami-san after filming." I would invite Ren to go with us, but that would only annoy Kanae. The last thing I need is another person mad at me.

"But Kyouko-chan, who will make sure Tsuruga-san gets a proper meal? Are you sure you …"

"She said no, Yukihito." The harsh tone of Tsuruga-san's voice makes us both jump.

"Well, please stay safe then, and don't get home too late." Yashiro-san grips the wheel with white knuckles, as I exit the car.

"You too, Yashiro-san. Please eat well tonight, Tsuruga-san." His eyes slit open, but he doesn't acknowledge my request.

"Have a nice evening Mogami-san." The way he says my name sends shivers through me. Why is it that his voice, even angry, is so seductive?

 **A/N: Two chapters in one day just because I like you guys. Not enough to not torture Ren and Kyouko, but enough to update. Thank you to my wonderful beta, unicornforcewinds.**


	14. Dreams

Kanae presses her palms into the table and remains silent. She is unable or unwilling to comprehend what I just told her. I thought about repeating myself, but it was hard enough to get it out the first time. We are in a nice restaurant, which is, thankfully, barely occupied. There is only us and two elderly women by the window, five tables down from us. Our waiter disappeared into the kitchen after taking our orders. Still, we are in public, and I could not bear to confess to her again that I, a pure Japanese maiden, was having impure thoughts. I can hardly wrap my head around it myself; so I don't expect Kanae to understand. She could at least say something though.

"Moko-san?" She flinches when I touch her hand. Hurt, I pull my hand away and hide it on my lap, beneath the table. "Mo…" she holds up a hand to quiet me. I sulk dejectedly, and we sit in silence until our waiter walks out with our food. "Thank you." I say to him, mostly for the chance to speak, rather than out of politeness.

For an hour, Kanae prolongs her dinner by taking small bites and chewing for five minutes. By the time she eventually runs out of food, I have been sitting in uncomfortable silence for thirty-five minutes. She offers me no mercy, silencing me again with her raised hand, as we wait for the waiter to come back for her plate.

"Can I offer you some dessert?" The polite man asks.

"No, we're ready to leave." She answers him gruffly, as she retrieves her wallet from her purse. I do the same ready to pay for my share but she stops me and hands the man her card.

"Moko-san?" I start, once we are outside the restaurant.

"Did I say you could speak?" Her stern voice quiets me again and we walk to her apartment.

Chiori is supposed to meet up with us later for our girls' night, but I think I might have ruined the mood. We already dropped our overnight bags off, and I'm not sure if she's letting me in her apartment to retrieve mine, or if it means I'm still allowed to stay the night.

"…" We're in the apartment, removing our shoes, when Kanae stops to stare at me. "You can speak now." She says finally, after tiring of looking at me.

"Oh, um…" I intend to form words with my mouth, but only unintelligible sounds come out. I don't know what she wants me to say.

"You want to have sex with that…with Tsuruga-san? And you felt you needed to tell me because," she stops to think over it in her head. "He isn't pressuring you, is he?"

"No! Why do people keep asking me that? Tsuruga-san wouldn't force me into anything. He doesn't even know that I think about things like this, and I can never let him know." I stand up, one shoe in my hand held over my heart. "He knows me as a maiden who is pure of heart, and he wouldn't like me thinking such impure thoughts. I made a promise to protect my virtue…"

"Shut up, Kyouko. You know he fantasizes about you all the time. Only a completely blind moron, with no concept of sexual arousal would miss his longing gazes. I don't know what the big deal is. You had a sex dream about him, that doesn't mean that you have to have sex." She catches my confused look and explains, "I was shocked at first, that you of all people would admit to something like that, especially in a public place. Still, after giving it some thought, you are seventeen, and those types of thoughts are only natural. Even more so when your boyfriend is the most wanted man in the country..."

I think over her words in my head a couple of times. "So, you think I should have _sex,"_ I shudder at the word, "with him?"

"Absolutely not! I said fantasies are normal, not intercourse. You're in high school still, and he's a grown man! Hold hands, permit him a kiss on the cheek every few dates, but don't sleep with him." Her hands clamp down on my shoulders as she shakes me, and my shoe falls to the floor, forgotten as I push against her arms to halt the abuse. "Don't let that playboy trick you into his bed, Kyouko. I forbid it."

"Ummm…" Chiori's voice flutters in from the doorway. "You two are aware that the door is open, right? The neighbors can hear you fighting about sex." She steps into the apartment, closing the door behind her. How could we forget the door? "What game is this?" She points between us, shoving at each other. "Is it for your drama? A scene about sexual urges and fantasies doesn't sound like it fits a period drama. Though, I guess it could work if a matronly woman were the one warning a young maiden about the evils of being seduced."

Kanae is the first to recover from the shock of Chiori barging in on our argument. She releases me, causing me to fall to the floor, and turns to greet the third Love Me member.

"Yeah, okay, polite greetings and what not," Chiori waves her off. "I'm more interested in what you two were discussing."

Gaining my senses back, I jump to my feet, declaring that we weren't speaking of anything. "Don't worry about it! It's nothing important."

"Kyouko had a sex dream about Tsuruga-san." Kanae places her traitor feet into her slippers and heads for the kitchen.

Chiori lights up as she exclaims, "Who hasn't? I've had my fair share of steamy dreams about his…"

"Hey, that's my boyfriend!" I try not to sound jealous, but how else does she expect me to react? She's lucky I don't slap that stupid wistful grin off her face.

"Tsuruga Ren, the hopelessly in love man, is your boyfriend. Tsuruga Ren, the _actor_ , is irresistible sex fodder for a teenage girl's erotic fantasies." Kanae says, bringing Chiori the plate of food we brought home for her.

"Moko-san, not you too." She shakes her head at my pathetic whining.

"No, not me, but you can't get too upset at Chiori for falling victim to his womanizing charms." I open my mouth to protest her word usage, but she raises a hand and amends the statement herself. "Maybe he isn't anymore, but from what you've told me, I bet at some point in his life he had a different woman every week."

"We don't know that, he could be a…"

"That man is not a virgin, Kyouko." Kanae is stern but not harsh. "I know you love him and I don't doubt that he cares about you, but it's too early in your relationship for that kind of thing, isn't it? It was one dream. Chalk it up to your lack of experience with men and hormones…what?" She glares at my face, seeing my shame.

I turn away from her to hide my embarrassment. "It's more like seven or eight dreams a night, and a couple of daydreams every few hours. I'm better during the day, especially when he's not around. When he is around though, I can hardly breathe. He's… he's…" I blush, trying to force out the image of water trailing down his chest. "He's irresistible sex fodder for a teenage girl's erotic fantasies." I repeat her words, falling onto her couch and burying my head in the cushions. How could I have said something like that? "Help me make it stop, Moko-san," I cry into the fabric, wanting the feelings and fantasies to go away.

"I don't know what to tell you. It's not like I've ever had a real boyfriend before." Kanae sits beside me and pats my head. "You should ask someone with more experience."

I look up at her knowing that she thought of saying something along the lines of, 'like your mother,' but she knows better than to actually throw out such careless words. A normal girl with a normal family could ask her mother, or an older sister. Even Kanae, with her dislike for her family, could turn to them if she absolutely needed this kind of advice. Who is a girl like me supposed to turn to? I can't ask _father;_ the thought of explaining the situation to Kuu is enough to make me want to run off to a nunnery and vow my eternal chastity to heaven. I suppose Okami-san would know about this type of thing, but there would be no saving Ren if Taisho-san ever found out.

"We could talk to my mom about it," Chiori chimes in, seeming to understand the situation. That could be an option, but I really don't want to meet with her mom and have to bring up the subject. I shake my head at her. "What about your president?"

"No!" Kanae and I swiftly shut down that idea, sending Chiori backpedaling in a corner.

"You could ask the root of your problem himself, I bet he has all sorts of answers." Kanae looks as if she is imagining something funny. "I'd pay to see the agony on his face though, as he tried to explain the birds and the bees to you."

"He can never find out!" I cross my arms, "I promised him that I would remain pure and I intend to keep that promise."

Recovering from her fear, Chiori walks over to us. "That sounds like an impossible promise, and not one a boyfriend would have you make. At least, not unless he was tricking you into staying away from other boys."

Kanae turns skeptical eyes to me. "When did you make this promise? Before or after you started dating."

"Before." I shrug, not wanting to talk about this anymore.

"Definitely trying to keep her chastity for himself." Kanae nods along with Chiori's conclusion, as they hold their hands up to their mouths and pretend to whisper.

"I bet he said something scary to her too. Scolding her and making her feel bad, and tricked the vow of purity out of her." Kanae says, shaking her head. "She told me once that he is a natural born con artist."

"He did not trick me, and only I get to call him that." I try to break into their conversation, but they ignore me.

"Jokes on him though isn't it? Now she'll protect her maidenhood to her death. She'll die before letting him touch her, because of that vow." Chiori snickers, casting a teasing look my way.

"In that case, I don't think we have anything to worry about. That man dug his own grave." Kanae seems pleased with this revelation, and sits back with a happy smile adorning her pretty face.

"Yeah, he's never getting laid." Chiori giggles. They are both enjoying my torment too much to be called friends. Weren't girls supposed to help one another figure these things out? Then again, neither of them knows anything either, except Chiori apparently has hot dreams about my boyfriend. "What?" She questions the look I'm giving her, as I imagine daggers stabbing into her.

"Nothing, just my friends are jerks and I have no one to help me solve this problem. I feel like I need my brain cleansed with bleach and holy water. Maybe I could make some talismans for extra protection." I wonder what kind of charms ward off unwanted thoughts of a se…filthy nature.

"You know we'd help you if we could, Kyouko. Trouble is, this problem is all in your head, and nothing we say or do can fix it. Tsuruga-san is your only option - he's the only person you're close to, who knows about sex. Go ask him how to curb unwanted desires, unless you know someone else who could help." I sit up straighter remembering Fujita-san. "Don't tell me you know someone?"

"Director Fujita." Kanae shakes her head releasing a slow sigh. "She offered to give me advice, but I'm not sure she'll want to tell me how to make this go away. In fact, she seemed to be more interested in encouraging my wanton thoughts."

"Let's call her." Chiori chirps excitedly.

"No, gross." Kanae looks disgusted. "We don't need Kyouko being told how to have more disturbing nightmares about that man. Besides, it'd be funnier to hear about Tsuruga-san trying to explain it to her."

She only thinks that because she knows me well enough to know that I will never be able to talk to him about it. I will go to her, moping about how I'll never be rid of my horrid thoughts.

"Relax, Moko-san. I hardly know Fujita-san, and I wouldn't ask her for this kind of help." Kanae nods with a smile.

"You two are boring. We can't outrun human nature forever, you know. Eventually even Kanae and I might meet someone who is as stupidly in love with us as Tsuruga-san is with you. Then we'll be sorry that we have no one to ask. I'll have to ask my mom." Chiori shivers with disgust.

Wasn't she enthusiastically swooning over her fantasies involving my boyfriend a moment ago? Kanae asks her about this, saving me from having to.

"Just because I fantasize about men doesn't mean I know about men, or anything else. Apparently Kyouko thinks about sex all the time, and we all know how hopeless she is. I only have the one dream and the actor changes every time to keep me interested." Chiori blushes to admit her own fickleness.

With that we drop the subject, having agreed to never bring it up again. Our conversation turns to our current work projects, which branches off to what we think the president will come up with for the Love Me section. Our worst fear is that he'll make us act in sappy love dramas next, instead of watching and writing up reports about them. Our night ends with a horror movie, as Chiori suggests that the best way to manipulate dreams is with movies. She doesn't mention what sort of dreams, but I can already tell that she's trying to help.

Unfortunately, when morning comes, I am even more mortified by my own thoughts than before. In my dreams, Tsuruga-san had taken the traits of the demon from the movie. Rough and violent, he stalked me in my mind. Once his hands captured me, he threw me down and wasted no time before he shoved my knees apart and took me. What's worse is that I, or at least the dream version of me, panted and moaned and enjoyed his harsh, wild treatment of my body. It's too much for me, and when Yashiro-san pulls up in Tsuruga-san's car I don't want to get in. He's in there, I know it.

"Kyouko," Kanae nudges me into the back seat so her and Chiori can get in.

"Good morning, Yashiro-san," I greet the bubbly manager before turning to my boyfriend who is, surprisingly enough, not oozing anger. "Tsuruga-san." I nod to him, but am too bashful to meet his eyes.

"Good morning ladies," Tsuruga-san greets Kanae and Chiori. I expect him to greet me specifically, but he says nothing to me. Normally, he would make a point of saying something to me. Even before we started dating, he would pay special attention to me.

"Good morning, Tsuruga-san," Chiori coos, earning a pinch on the arm from Setsu. It must be her, because I am not a violent jealous person.

Kanae arches a brow at me but says nothing as Yashiro-san begins to drive. It's almost as if he's everyone's manager now, since he insists on driving Chiori and Kanae around whenever he knows I'm with them. Chiori and I are dropped off at the office to do Love Me work. Tsuruga-san exits the car with us but hangs back to talk to Yashiro-san, while the two of us head in. Kanae is going to film a commercial for shampoo, and Yashiro-san insisted on driving her all the way there.

"Are you going to talk to him?" Chiori asks, as we change into our uniforms. I shake my head and remind her that we agreed not to talk about it. "Kyouko, I don't know much about love, but I can tell you that keeping secret feelings bottled up inside is not a safe way to live." Of course, she would be against me hiding from my emotions.

"Thanks, it really helped to have the night with you and Kanae. I think for now, talking to you two will be enough." Chiori doesn't look convinced, but she nods anyway, before waving goodbye. I watch her exit into the halls of LME, and spot Ren waiting in the hallway. With a predatory grin, he enters the room.

"Hi," he says, walking closer to me. I want to scream at him not to look at me like that. I want to beg him to touch me and never stop looking at me with those hungry eyes.

"Hi." I answer his greeting, scrutinizing the wall behind him. "Did you need something from me?" I try to keep the quiver out of my voice, but the way he looks at me sends a thrill through me.

"Yes." The way he says it causes my thighs to clench, and I involuntarily flick my eyes over to his, finding them raking over my body. It should be his hands roaming over my skin, slowly undressing me, and…

I shake the disgraceful thoughts away. "What is it?" He takes a step forward and I take a step back. His smile wavers and he inhales deeply.

"Nothing, I just wanted to see you." He takes another step, and I practically leap back. I want him to touch me so much it scares me.

"You just saw me in the car." My back hits the lockers, and I stare at his feet, stopping in front of me. We were just together, and I was seated directly across from him in the back seat.

"I did, but there were other people with us. I wanted to see just _you_." I feel his hand glide over my arm without touching me. Why doesn't he just touch me? Shove me into the lockers and… "Are you coming over tonight?" Ren interrupts my wayward mind before it can complete the fantasy.

I look up, and for a moment I wonder what would happen if I kissed him. "Yeah, sure. I'll make us dinner."

"Or I could buy us dinner." He suggests, pulling his hand away. I stop myself from grabbing that hand and placing it on my body.

"Then why would I come over?" Was there something else he needed?

He backs away, exhaling a sigh, "I don't know, Kyouko. I really don't know why my girlfriend would come over to my place. She obviously doesn't want to." He's out the door before I can say anything, leaving me with a feeling of dread in the pit of my stomach.


	15. Why Don't You Kiss Me?

Shaking with fear, I walk over to his car. He was mad. Ren was very mad at me and I don't want to face him. I stop just outside the door and raise my hand, knocking on the window. If he's still really angry, I can just take the bus. I drop my hand, biting my lip, as I contemplate how fast I'll have to run to avoid being scolded for whatever it was I did.

Wait a minute. What did I do? Did he really have a reason to be mad enough to storm out? All I did was ask a question... Maybe I should be mad at him for walking out on our conversation.

"It's unlocked." I forget to be angry as his breath tickles my ear.

"Ren!" I turn around and jump back to keep the distance between us.

"Are you driving?" He asks motioning to the side of the car I'm on. It feels strange to see him smiling, as if this morning never happened.

"No, I, uh…I thought you were in the car." His fingers push my hair behind my ear, and I flinch away from the jolt the contact sends through me.

He pulls away and holds a paper bag out to me. "I was inside picking this up." I take it, inspecting it briefly, but it's just an ordinary brown bag with the logo of LA Hearts on it. "Dinner." He answers the question before I can ask, as we take our seats in the car. "And to watch a movie, play cards, or a board game. To talk."

"What?" He starts the car smiling at me.

"You asked me why you would come over. Forgive me for not answering sooner, I wasn't sure myself." He makes sure I'm buckled before he starts driving, and I smile at how concerned he is for my safety. "I actually thought of calling my dad, but that wouldn't have gone well." He is quiet after this admission, and I know I'm not supposed to ask.

"Why not?" I can't help myself. Are he and his father not on speaking terms? Did he do something to displease his parents? Do his parents not like actors? Would they not like me? The desire to know more about him supersedes my instinctual politeness.

He shrugs and I wish he wasn't driving, so that I could slap the smile right off his face.

"Why weren't you sure how to answer me earlier?" I change the subject quickly, not wanting to annoy him.

"Because I've never had a real girlfriend." He stops at a red light, contemplating his own words for a moment. "I dated a lot of girls when I was younger, but the things we did…" he glances at me with his wicked look on his face. The one I've grown used to seeing every time he does something to make me uncomfortable. "Basically, all we ever did together was have sex, and while that's fun for a while, relationships that aren't built on feelings are bound to fall apart."

His words cause my body to flood with heat, and I know I must be glowing bright red. I squirm as my eyes close, listening to him chuckle triumphantly at my reaction. My emotions go into overdrive thinking of him doing _that_ with other girls. Just how many is a _lot_ of girls, and what does he mean by _all_ they did?

"I like spending time with you," he continues, drawing my attention away from my thoughts. "I like having pointless arguments about dinner with you, and seeing you turn into a tomato when I mention sex. See, like that." I pout at him, as he points at my still blushing face.

"Basically, you want a girlfriend you can bully."

"Yes, forever and ever." We're cast into the darkness of the parking garage, but there's enough light so that I can make out enough of his features, and tell that he's teasing me. He turns off the car, and I have no warning before his lips are on mine. They're soft and warm, and gone way too soon.

"I…" I search frantically for the door handle behind me, struggling to get away from him. The seat belt hinders my escape, as I pull on the handle and try to jump out. Not that I would have gotten far if I hadn't been buckled, considering the door won't open no matter how hard I try.

"Did you forget that the doors lock?" Ren sounds like he's amused, but I can sense an unmistakable negative energy radiating off him; I've made him angry again. The locks click and he opens the door, bathing me in light. "Are you coming?"

"Yes!" I jump from the car, almost dropping our dinner, as I rush to catch up with him. He removes the bag from my arms and takes over carrying it, causing our hands to brush, and sending electricity running through me again. I hope he doesn't notice the half-step back I take, or the safe distance I maintain, as we walk to the door.

"Are you mad at me?" I ask, watching him set the food out on the table.

His lopsided smirk gives me my answer before he speaks, "No, did you do something for me to be mad about?"

"Mm," I shake my head, seating myself across from him, "no, I don't think so." Maybe he doesn't want to ask me why I react the way I do. Does he want to give me my space? "But you were definitely angry last night, and this morning," I pout, forgetting that he can clearly hear me.

"I was?" There it is, his lying gentleman smile.

"In the parking garage, too, you were mad." Ignoring me, he begins eating the sandwich he got for himself, prompting me to examine the rest of the food on the table.

"This isn't a healthy dinner, Tsuruga-san." To be fair, only his food is unhealthy - he made sure to get me a proper meal.

"Oh, are you mad at me now?" He steals a carrot from my plate. "You're the one hogging all the vegetables I got for us to share."

"Share?" If he intends for us to eat off the same dish, then why is everything on my side? "Here," I try to divide the vegetables between us, but he blocks me. "Tsuruga-san?"

"Eat your food, Kyouko." He's mad again, so I return the food to my plate, sulking over it. "I'm not mad at you, I'm upset with myself."

"Why?" He snatches another carrot, avoiding the question. I hate that he does that, and I hate it even more that I let him get away with it.

We finish eating in silence. My eyes flick up every few seconds, to see him staring down at his plate even after he's eaten his sandwich. He doesn't look at me as we clean up, and he speaks to the floor when he says he'll drive me home. Normally he suggests that I sleep over, with the excuse that it's easier for Yashiro-san, but I think he just likes having me here. Even on the nights he can't convince me to stay, he'll try to trick me into staying long enough to watch TV. Tonight, he doesn't waste any time, immediately putting on his shoes and grab his keys.

"Goodnight, Mogami-san." A barely audible whisper reaches my ears as I wait for the kiss on my forehead that doesn't come.

In the morning, Yashiro-san arrives to take me to school, and I smile despite the pain that shoots through me at seeing the vacant space where Ren should be. More than anything, I want to see him. He could be angry or mean and bully me, and I would be happy to see him, to _innocently_ flirt with him, teasing our poor fangirl manager.

"I'll be here to pick you up around noon. The schedule is pretty tight today, so please be waiting, as I have to swing back to give Ren the car as soon as I deliver you to your interview." It crosses my mind to ask why he doesn't leave Ren's car with him and take a company car for himself, but it seems unimportant when my brain keeps flashing to Ren's face, and how sad it looked when he drove me home last night.

"Where will Tsuruga-san be today?" I ask, trying to sound as uninterested as possible.

The question causes Yashiro-san to perk up, answering quickly. "Ren has a photoshoot today, followed by a meeting at TBM, where we'll have a lunch break there around ten. If you happen to ditch school to come see him... I mean, to eat with us, I won't say anything. In fact, I'll even text you what room we're in."

"Thank you, but I was just curious. See you at noon, Yashiro-san." I watch him leave, making sure the coast is clear, before heading to the bus stop.

This isn't for my own personal gain, it really isn't. I am merely concerned by Tsuruga-san's behavior, and it seems that the stupid chicken is the only one he will speak with openly. I am not prying into his thoughts for myself; that isn't why I asked Yashiro-san about Tsuruga-san's schedule for today. I only want to provide him with an outlet for his troubles, since he won't tell me anything when I ask. Just because his chicken friend can see all his faces, and hear his deepest thoughts, why should I be jealous? Of course I'm not, I'm only worried that my behavior has gone too far.

What if I've pushed him away? I never meant to make him stop kissing my forehead or calling me princess. All I wanted was to stop having these impure thoughts.

At ten to ten, I don the chicken suit and knock on the door to the dressing room. Yashiro-san had texted me the room they would be in, just in case I changed my mind. As he opens the door, a mixture of concern and confusion overtake his professional demeaner, and he looks behind me as though he's expecting someone else.

"I had been hoping for Kyouko-chan, but this guy is at the door instead," he reveals, pulling me inside.

"Hi." Why is Ren looking at the chicken like that? I've seen that look before, those wandering eyes of his make me feel naked, and what's with that smile? It's half amused and half akin to the emperor. "Can you leave us for a moment? I think she wants to talk to me about something personal."

"Yes of course." Yashiro-san agrees but turns around, shocked when he realizes what Ren had just said. "She? Wait, I can't," I shove him out the door and close it. I hear him scream what sounds like, 'but what about Kyouko?' I'll have to find a way to apologize for being so rude later.

For a few minutes, I stare at the door, wondering what to do next. I can feel the eyes on me penetrating the chicken costume. It makes me shiver with worry that he might be able to see straight through me.

"Did you need something from me?" His voice washes over me, and I am shivering for a much different reason.

Yes, I want to say, ready to climb out of this costume and straight into his arms. When I turn, he's still staring at me like he wants to devour me. I wonder if maybe he hasn't had anything to eat today, and the sight of a chicken is making him hungry.

"What is it?" He seems even more amused, watching me from his place on the couch.

"Umm, well I wanted to…" Good going Kyouko, you came here to ask him about his behavior but didn't stop to think that there's no reason for Bo to know about how he's been acting lately. I think for a moment, trying to find a way to broach the subject. "I wanted to know how things are going with you and your girlfriend."

Ren rolls his eyes and gives me one of his infuriating shrugs. "Why would you want to know about that?" What the hell is _that_ supposed to mean? He continues speaking before I can embarrass myself by screaming at him. "I don't really feel like talking about _her_ right now, ask me something more interesting."

Don't say ' _her_ ' like that! "Do you regret asking her out?" I blurt out suddenly but I don't want to know the answer. If he says yes, I think I might break apart.

"Maybe." He shrugs again, and I try my best not to shove him and scream at him for being such a jerk. I don't think I can keep myself contained for too much longer. "Well to be honest, I think she might be having second thoughts about me. Rather, I don't know that she ever felt the same way about me that I do for her. If you must know, we're probably not going to be together much longer. She doesn't seem to want to be with me."

Shit, I was right; my behavior is driving him away. I need to fix this before it's too late.

"You're Tsuruga Ren, every girl in Japan wants to be with you." I try to stroke his ego, attempting to reassure him that his girlfriend wants him.

He shakes his head, "I don't want every girl in Japan though, just her, and I don't want her to be with me because I'm Tsuruga Ren." He sneers his own name and leans back on the couch, closing his eyes. "That is, I want to tell her my real name, but I'm afraid she won't stay with me if I do."

"What? Why?" I'm suddenly angered by his lack of trust in me. I know I have issues with intimacy, but he's hiding all kinds of secrets from me, and I don't question his love. Why am I the one being doubted? He's the one keeping who knows what concealed behind that gentleman's mask of his.

"For starters, there's the physical aspect of our relationship. I don't expect her to be open to sex at this point, but I can hardly get a kiss from her without feeling like a perverted lech. I try to be patient and mindful of her boundaries, but it hurts knowing that she doesn't want me to touch her." He's staring at his hands, as if he's seeing something that I can't. "I feel like I'm unworthy, or like some kind of beast with claws she's afraid of getting scratched by."

He pauses, waiting for me to interject, but I say nothing. Not only don't know what to say, but I don't trust that my voice won't crack and reveal my true identity. I'm mad at him for being hurt by a lack of a physical relationship. He knows me well enough to have known from the beginning that I wouldn't be able to do _that_ with him. At the same time, I'm angry at myself for being unable to express my love to this stupid, beautiful man, and hurting him with my childish fears.

"I know relationships are more than being physical with somebody, and if I really love her it shouldn't matter if all we do is spend time together." I sigh, wanting to berate him for wanting to corrupt me so badly, but also wanting to admit to all the reasons I'm afraid of letting him touch me. "I suppose the real problem I have with her, is that she's never once said that she loves me, or even that she _likes_ me."

I haven't? I open my mouth to declare that I've said that I love him plenty of times, but then I think back, trying to recount them. Every single time, I was in the presence of someone else. Not once have I looked him in the eyes and confessed my feelings.

"Sometimes I wonder if she only agreed to be with me out of some ridiculous obligation she feels towards me, or maybe she's with me because she's not used to the attention. What if by telling her I love her, I confused her emotions, and now she's simply acting according to my feelings instead of her own? It makes me feel like I'm never going to have a place in her heart, so how can I tell her about my past, when I'm in constant fear that the slightest misstep will cause me to lose her?" He laments, his head in his hands, "I don't want her to feel trapped in this relationship."

"I'm sorry." I whisper, not bothering to attempt to disguise my voice.

His head pops up and he looks at me as though he's just remembered I'm here. "No, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said any of that to you." He runs a hand through his hair, flushing a bright pink.

"Don't worry about it, I'll always be here if you need someone to talk to." I mumble, still processing the new information he's divulged.

For some reason, my words cause him to chuckle. "You're so adorable." He continues to be amused as I am dying of horror inside this damned chicken. Why is he calling someone else, who he knows is a girl, adorable? Has he fallen in love with the girl in the chicken costume? Tsuruga-san how can you look at another girl with such a soft expression?

I bow to him, "I should return to set before anyone notices I'm missing."

I run out of the dressing room, passing a very confused Yashiro-san, who's reading a magazine with me on the cover. The tears are spilling from my eyes by the time I reach the nearest bathroom to rip Bo's head off and hurl it across the room. What have I done? Not only does Ren think I don't like him, but now I might lose his affections to someone he thinks is a stranger in a costume. That look was my look. His warm gaze and relaxed smile belong to me, and no other girl is supposed to get that expression from him.

I tear at the zipper in the back of my costume and yank myself free. This stupid thing is giving me nothing but trouble, and I don't know how long I sit crying in the bathroom, but since nobody's called me, it must not be too long. Still, it feels like forever before the tears run out. I check the time, noting that I have about thirty minutes to get back to school and wait for Yashiro-san. I stumble to my feet and gather the feathery costume to return. I'll be filming an episode tomorrow night so I should get this back quickly. Distractedly I carry the bird back to its rightful place.

"Kyouko-chan?" Hikaru-san waves to me as he finishes his conversation with the producer. I wave back, feigning a smile.

"Is something wrong, Kyouko-chan?" The producer asks, showing an uncharacteristic amount of concern. He's been doing that more and more lately, since Box R has started airing. I can't tell if he's afraid of me, or in awe of my acting. Probably a little of both.

"I'm fine," I lie, hoping neither of them asks why I'm here to begin with. Hikaru-san watches me closely, as we both bow to the producer before he leaves. "I'm fine," I repeat, trying harder to pretend that I'm happy. Normally after crying, I would be okay again, but how could I ever be okay if I'm afraid I might be dumped for the me in the chicken suit? I can barely contain my laughter at the absurdity of my situation.

"You didn't have a fight with your boyfriend, did you?" He sounds almost hopeful, but there is concern in his eyes. "I won't lie, I don't think he deserves you, but I'd still hate to see you cry. He deserves you even less if he made you cry."

"No," I hold up my hand, stopping him from touching my cheek. "Tsuruga-san wouldn't make me cry, not on purpose, at least." He loves me, I know that, and he wouldn't leave me for a stranger. Even if I never let him touch me, he'll wait forever and do whatever it takes to make me happy. "Sometimes I get overwhelmed by his love." Bo could never take my place, even if she wasn't me. In fact, he probably only finds Bo endearing because she reminds him of me.

"Overwhelmed?" Hikaru-san doesn't sound like he likes the word, and I blush, thinking about the way Ren smiled at Bo. He'd been sad, yet his eyes sparkled when he smiled. "Kyouko-chan, he doesn't, I mean... he's a gentleman, right?" I stop swooning over my boyfriend, to stare at my friend and co-worker, blushing awkwardly. Somehow, I feel like I've heard this question before, just with different wording.

"Yes, he is," I assert, hoping that Hikaru-san will drop the subject.

"What I mean is…" Please just let it go, Hikaru-san. "I know that he's an adult and you're, well, you're not exactly a child, but there are certain things that adults in relationships sometimes do, and…" he trails off, sighing. "I just hope he isn't overwhelming you physically…" He stops speaking when he sees my annoyed expression. Why is everyone so concerned about our physical relationship?

"I know what adults in relationships do, Hikaru-san. I'm not an idiot, and as you said, I'm not a child. I don't think it's any of your business what Ren and I do or don't do, but if you're concerned about him hurting me, I can assure you that he would never do anything to cause me harm or make me uncomfortable." Except when my discomfort amuses him, I add silently, but that's another story. "When I said I get overwhelmed, I only meant that he loves me so much, and I never knew anyone could." It isn't something he needs to know, but I feel compelled to tell him that Ren is a good boyfriend.

After a moment of silence, Hikaru-san releases a breath and whispers, "I'm glad."

"Hmm?" I cock my head at him, confused by his sad smile.

"You look really happy when you talk about him, so I'm happy for you." I smile back, grateful that the awkwardness seems to have passed. "I should get going, now. See you tomorrow, Kyouko-chan."

We wave goodbye, and he leaves me alone with my thoughts. I laugh, knowing it was silly of me to think Ren would choose a stranger in a costume over me. Still, I can't help but sigh, letting Ren's sadness become mine. How could I not have told him that I love him? Here I am, fearing rejection and dreading his wrath over my distasteful thoughts, while he's getting hurt by my lack of affection, and he hasn't even said anything. If I were in his place, I might have accused him of toying with me, or not really loving me.

"Okay Kyouko, go to him now and tell him how you feel." That would be the best way to ease his insecurities. My phone vibrates and I excitedly answer it, hoping it's him.

"Kyouko-chan, where are you?" Yashiro-san asks and my face falls a little. I want to tell Ren that I love him, not talk to Yashiro-san. "Kyouko-chan, you'll be late for work if you don't come out right now."

"Ah!" I look at my phone to check the time. Crap! I was supposed to drop off Bo and rush back to school before Yashiro-san arrived to pick me up. What if my tardiness causes him to be late getting the car back to Ren, and I end up making Tsuruga-san late? "I'm sorry Yashiro-san, but I'm currently at TBM."

"Kyouko-chan!"

"I'm sorry, Yashiro-san." I want to cry again, this time out of frustration, for being so caught up in my problems that I caused my manager undo stress.

"No worries, Kyouko-chan, it's just that I wonder why you didn't come to see Ren if you were already there." I don't have an explanation to give him, not that it matters - his romance obsessed brain makes up an excuse. "Could you perhaps be too nervous to go see him? He might notice any hidden feelings you're harboring, if you reveal that you skipped school just to see him."

The grown man squeals, probably naming our children in his head. "Oh, Kyouko-chan, there's nothing to worry about. He's still there finishing up an interview, and I'll bet that if you go up and surprise him, he'll be happy to see you. You have to wait for me to come back anyway."

"Right, I'll go up and look after him until you get here. He probably didn't eat anything for lunch, and you want me to scold him, of course." It really is too fun to tease Yashiro-san.

"No, were you even listening to me, Kyouko-chan? I was talking about feelings, not food." Yashiro-san sounds disappointed by my blatantly disregarding his whole speech.

"Is he in a bad mood, do you want me to go see him so he has someone to bully?" I'm already on my way back up to his room, suddenly eager to see him. All he wants is to hear that I love him, and I can do that. I can go into his room and hug him close and say what I feel inside... I hope.

"Kyouko-chan," he sighs into the phone. "Oh, well, I'll be back soon." We hang up as I arrive at the room. I bite my lip, stopping in front of the door I fled from earlier. I knock first before entering, assuming correctly that it would be empty.

I sit down, thinking about what to say when he comes back from his interview. Should I ask him how it went, or what it was for? Maybe he'll be filming a new drama somewhere in this building. Will he think it's weird that I'm in here waiting for him? I could run into his arms and say that I love him the second he enters the room.

"What are you doing?" A chuckle comes from above me and I stop rolling around on the couch to look up into my boyfriend's laughing eyes.

"Uh," I can't speak. I have to close my eyes just to stop the color from rising into my cheeks. It's unsettling how the most innocuous words can bring the worst thoughts to my mind. No, his voice is to blame, isn't it? His voice makes everything sound so sensual. I sit up, expecting that he'll want to sit on the couch with me.

"Yashiro-san went to pick you up, you know." I nod, fighting the warmth that wants to grow in my stomach. "Bo came to visit me earlier. Have you ever seen her out of her costume?" I nod again, not thinking. "Is she cute?"

My eyes shoot open to glare at him. "Why do you care?"

"I don't." He smiles, capturing my gaze, and I realize I've fallen into a trap.

I want him to sit down with me, but he stays standing, towering over me. If I lean forward a little and reach out, I could grip his shirt and pull him down on top of me. I bite my lip, desperate to quell the need to have him touch me.

"Shouldn't you be at school?"

I open my mouth to answer him, but the only words that come to mind are carnal pleas. I want to beg for things that I shouldn't even know about, let alone be thinking of. He looks genuinely confused now, as I continue to stare at him with my mouth hanging open.

"I…" my heart skips as he sits down with a sigh, as far away from me as the couch will allow. I want him to touch me.

Abruptly, he changes the subject. "Are you coming over tonight?" Why does he always ask like a child would ask for permission to eat candy? I nod since my mouth only wants to say words that would betray my sinful thoughts. "Do you want to watch a movie?" His question surprises me, and I turn my head to look at his blushing face. "I'm sorry that I can't really take you out to see a new movie, but I think I might have some in my collection that you'd like. If not, we could send Yashiro-san to pick something for next time."

"Next time? Is this a date, Tsuruga-san?" We haven't been calling our dinners together dates, because they happen in his apartment, but I suppose we can't really go out. At least, not unless he takes me to someplace secluded every time. If that's the case, then it would be better to save time and just stay home.

"Only if you want it to be." He thinks about something, weighing it around in his mind before suggesting. "We could always go to our picnic spot, chase the fairies and watch the stars together."

My head is screaming at me to place myself in his lap. "We could watch a movie. I doubt you have any Disney, though." _Please touch me,_ that's what my brain is telling me to say.

"Why wouldn't I? I have your favorite, and my favorite, and just about every other animated fairy tale that has ever been made." He boasts, but I have a hard time believing a guy his age would like Disney films.

"You have a favorite Disney film?" He is aware of himself enough to blush. "Something like that could hurt your image if anyone ever found out."

"Good thing you are the only person who will ever know." A secret that only I will know! I perk up, turning eager eyes to him. "Calm down Cinderella, it isn't that much of a surprise, is it? I mean, you and I are actually quite similar."

"Okay, so my favorite is Cinderella, what's yours? Sleeping beauty?" He scrunches his face in an obvious show of denial. "Snow…" Shaking his head at me, he dons that teasing look that I've come to enjoy. It can be so fun when he plays these games, and I think he does it to help me relax. Thinking hard, I recall the new tea cups he'd bought - a matching set with Beauty and the Beast motifs painted on them. "You're not a beast, Ren."

"Don't be so sure about that, there are things you don't know about me." Where did the serious atmosphere come from? "Eventually I'll have to tell you, and I'm hoping that you'll be able to still l…forgive me."

It's involuntary, but I flinch before he can say love, and my heart drops when he stops himself and changes his words. I open my mouth, wanting to tell him that I love him, but my tongue refuses to move. Why is it so hard to say? Maybe it wouldn't hurt to ask Fujita-san for help, after all.

"Sorry." He shouldn't be the one apologizing. I swallow hard trying to force out the words that I have never said directly, to anyone. "I'm not supposed to show you this, but apparently I have no self-control, and I also happen to think it's hilarious." He gets up and grabs a magazine from a table against the wall. Looking worried, he holds the glossy cover to his chest. "On second thought, you might not think it's funny."

"What is it?" The sight of his teasing smile makes my thighs clench. Is he playing with me, to make me comfortable, or is he trying to make me want him more?

"Never mind, it isn't funny." I walk over to him and try to snatch the magazine. He pulls it from my grasp and holds it above my head, making me jump for it. "I'm serious, you won't like it. It's only funny to me because I'm a bully, and the look on Yukihito's face was priceless."

"Show it to me," I demand, grabbing his arm and yanking it down. He switches the magazine into his opposite hand, and I jump up before he has the chance to move it out of my reach. His arms wrap around me, effectively crushing me to him and locking our arms over the magazine. "Ren!" I squeak with a giggle, enjoying the game.

"Here, look." Holding up my hands, he maneuvers the magazine, so that I can see the glossy image of Yashiro-san and me at the beach. "I told you that you wouldn't like it." In bold letters, I am proclaimed to be in a sweet yet forbidden relationship with our manager. Ren can hardly contain his laughter as he holds me tight and whispers in my ear. "Your face right now is even more priceless than Yashiro-san's." I shiver when his hot breath touches my skin.

"You are such a bully, how is this funny?" My words serve mostly as a distraction, as I struggle to not push him away.

His lips press against the shell of my ear, and I bite back a moan. "I know you enjoy teasing our dear Yukihito as much as I do."

All I can think of is his warm breath on my neck and his strong arms around my shoulders, bathing me in his scent. I lean back, turning my head up, to press my nose against his pulse and breathe in deeply. He moans, tightening his arms around me, and I lift my head to look him in the eyes. _Kiss me,_ I try to mentally command him, knowing well he can't read my mind.

"I'm sorry." As quick as lightning he's distancing himself from me, and I know I have only myself to blame.

"No, Ren-" the door opens, and in walks our annoyed manager.

"Ren will pick you up tonight, I have something to take care of," he bites out through clenched teeth, as his fingers write furiously in his planner. "Now, we're running behind children, so let's get a move on, before you're both late." He's much more annoyed than I've ever seen him before, and it's ridiculously funny, or at least it would be if I weren't worried about Ren.

"Is it urgent?" Ren has a wicked smile, as he pries into Yashiro-san's business.

"Yes," he grits out, finally looking up from his planner. His eyes bulge at the sight of me, and he rushes over to snatch the magazine I'd forgotten was still in my hands. "Ren! Car, now, both of you!" Despite my concern for my boyfriend, I have to hide a laugh at the sight of Yashiro-san blushing so bright he's practically glowing.

"I told you it was funny," Ren jokes, pointing at our manager.

A menacing growl leaves Yashiro-san's throat, and he points at me and then the door. "You're both supposed to be professionals. Move it."

"Have a sense of humor, Yukihito. Remember what we told Mogami-san, rumors are bound to surface, but only morons believe the ones in these types of magazines. They don't even do a good job on the photoshopping - blurry lines and separate backgrounds, plus half of my body is still in some of these, clearly speaking to her instead of you." Ren tries and fails to soothe Yashiro-san, as we head to the car.

"Morons! I'll have you know that my mother reads this publication. She's been calling me all morning, leaving messages for me to explain myself. According to her, Kyouko-chan is both too young and too pretty for me."

"That's true, but she's the type of person who'd be willing to overlook that." I blush at his compliment as we reach the car. Yashiro-san is too distracted to see Ren open the car door for me, a mundane thing to do normally, but it should be enough to make our number one fangirl hysterical.

"Rennnn!" Yashiro-san whines, not even noticing that both of his charges have climbed into the back together.

Tentatively, Ren touches my fingers, and I respond by opening my palm and letting him wrap his hand around mine, lacing our fingers together.


	16. Kiss You

My stomach falls as my words are greeted with silence. This was no different than confessing my sins to Kanae. Fujita-san said she would listen to my concerns patiently and she did just that, as I rushed through an explanation of my problems. I only have a thirty minute break to eat, and I'm using it to ask my director for love advice. If that isn't screwed up enough, she's been rendered speechless by what I have told her. I check the phone to make sure she hasn't hung up on me.

I'm about to apologize, but she sighs, asking, "have you ever tried just relaxing when you're alone with him?"

"What do you mean?" Of course, I relax with him; that's part of the problem isn't it. I'm too unguarded with him, allowing him too much control over my emotions.

"You're kind of intense, exceedingly polite and borderline obsessed with propriety. I suggest you let go of what you think is right and proper, at least a little, and just go with whatever you feel. Only do what you're comfortable with, of course." I worry my lip, afraid she might be telling me to act on my innermost desires. "It doesn't have to be sexual, Kyouko-chan, you will be watching a movie meant for children, after all. Maybe you could do something related to the movie, something innocent and fun."

"I don't really think Tsuruga-san would enjoy…" she interrupts me with a stern bark.

"If he wants you to feel comfortable with him, then he'll go along with whatever you want for now." She continues in a softer tone, "he's aware that you've never had a real relationship, and he is a gentleman. It sounds to me like he's waiting for you to set the pace and adjusting to accommodate you."

I nod, "I know that. I'll try to relax more and think of something fun for us to do."

"Good, remember stay calm, _relax_. Have fun being with the man you care about, and call me tomorrow to let me know how it goes." We hang up and I rush through my meal to get back to work on time.

Ren picks me up at the end of the day. _Calm. Stay calm. Relax._ I tell myself, taking deep breaths as I get into the car, only to find he has another tabloid, bearing the same cover story as the one from this morning. The amount of glee he derives from these fabrications does not amuse me.

"It's not funny," I scold, but I can't help smiling along with him. Okay, maybe it is a _little_ funny.

"It is funny, and I'm happy they're spending so much time on made up stories about you. Yes, it's annoying, but it means that people are taking notice of you. My girl is becoming more popular." It makes me so happy to hear the pride in his voice, at my fame increasing. "I should buy you a present to celebrate."

"No, you shouldn't," I dismiss, a little more irritated than I should be. Maybe him flirting with Bo still bothers me a little.

"Too late." He smirks starting to drive.

"What?" I clench my jaw and he looks worried for a moment, like he knows he's pushed my buttons too much for one day.

"Nothing I'm kidding." He thinks I'm annoyed by him buying me a present, but all I can think about is how he called that chicken adorable.

 _Relax!_ I mentally scream, but it has the opposite effect.

When we get home, he hurries in and snatches a long object off the table. I catch enough of a glimpse of it to see that it is a deep blue with silver letters etched into the side. This hopeless man will use any excuse to buy me the most expensive gifts he can find.

"Pick out a movie, I'll make some popcorn." He calls to me from the kitchen. I roll my eyes and head over to large shelf where he keeps them. He wasn't kidding when he said he had the whole collection of animated fairytales, and he even has the live action Cinderella, still in its package, waiting for me to open. In fact, almost all the movies still have their plastic wrapping on them. I suspect he bought most of these movies recently, and has been waiting for the day he could share them with me.

Returning with the popcorn, he isn't the least bit surprised to find me opening the animated Cinderella. "You didn't burn it." I'm only half teasing him about the perfectly popped kernels sitting in the bowl. Mostly, I'm surprised he didn't start a mini fire and need me to finish making the popcorn.

"I know how to use a microwave," he murmurs, feigning offense as he takes his seat on the couch.

"I should make something proper for us to eat, it is pretty late, and I know you probably skipped lunch." He shakes his head, inviting me to sit beside him.

"Movies are supposed to be viewed with junk food only. Unless you're going in the kitchen for candy or an artificially flavored drink, you should sit down." Since when does he have candy, or anything besides water and alcohol?

"Did you go grocery shopping specifically for tonight and only buy junk?" I'm appalled, but unsurprised by such unhealthy choices. Part of me also thinks it's sweet though, that he went out of his way to prepare for our movie night.

"Yes, and I wasn't sure what kind of candy you'd like so, I bought everything." I sit down, shaking my head at his absurdity.

Of course, he would buy out the whole store just for me. The movie begins, but I can't focus on the screen. My eyes are too busy tracing the outline of his face - caressing his strong jaw, stroking his cheek bones, gliding into the soft locks of hair that hang in his eyes.

"What?" He catches me watching him instead of the movie, and my cheeks become heated. Clearly, I have no idea how to relax around him. My senses are on edge just looking at him, and I can't help but want to touch every inch of perfection that is my boyfriend. "I thought you'd be singing along by now," he teases, grabbing a handful of popcorn.

I bite my lip, taking a little joy from the darkness the gesture brings to his eyes. That could be the fun, innocent to help me relax with him, but, "It would be too embarrassing to sing and the song is over."

"Come on," he goads, leaning in close enough to make me blush, but not so close that I feel overwhelmed. "A dream is a wish…" I cover my mouth with both my hands as he begins to sing, doing his best to make his voice sound high pitched and girlie. "No matter how your heart is grieving, Kyouko, if you keep on believing…" he stands up and mimics Cinderella's movements pretending to be singing along with birds and mice.

Giggling at his antics, I cave and begin to sing along with him. We recite every line, with me playing Cinderella, and Ren expertly acting every other role. By the end of the movie, he's singing in his normal voice, and we're dancing around the room like Cinderella and Prince Charming. Ren even hands me the magazine from earlier, rolled up like a bouquet, as we pretend to get married.

Lips locked, we jump on the couch to ride away in our carriage. The kiss starts out as a silly end to our game, with me giggling against his mouth and him grinning widely. Slowly, the kiss morphs into something soft and sensual. It's completely different from what we filmed on the beach, that kiss had been hard and fevered - forceful at times, and made awkward by the people and cameras. Ren doesn't shove me down or grip me harshly, he remains gentle, leaving it up to me to take the kiss further.

I pull him closer, snaking my hands up his chest and lock them around his neck. He has one hand cupping my face while the other wraps around me, supporting me as I slowly lean back. Our lips move against each other of their own volition, as I pull him on top of me and bury my fingers in his hair. He groans into the kiss, and I nip at his bottom lip, sucking it into my mouth instinctively, to draw more noises out of him. My own throat is working to produce erotic sounds, which he seems to enjoy, if the hardness pressing against my thigh is any indication. I rub my leg over the growing bulge, as he slips his tongue between my lips to dance with mine.

"Mmmm," he tries to pull back, but I don't want it to stop, I never want this to stop. "Kyouko," there's caution in his voice, and he turns his head to break the kiss.

I kiss up his jawline to his ear. "What's wrong?" He shudders, giving me a thrill to know that I have so much control over him. "Ren," I call to him, and he returns his lips to mine.

My hands roam over his back, pressing into the hard muscles that flex beneath my touch. His hands remain in my hair and on my back, as though he's afraid to move them. I brush my thigh over the throbbing length in his pants, as my hands slide down his back and sneak under his shirt. His grip on me tightens and his hips jerk into me. We separate briefly, and I pull his shirt over his head, tossing it carelessly behind me. With a guttural moan, he lifts me up and flips us over, breaking the kiss.

"Ren?" Strong hands cradle my face as he stares up at me. "Did I do something wrong?"

Taking a deep breath, he pulls down my shirt, but I hadn't even noticed that he pushed it up. He sits up and hugs me to him, kissing my temple. "No." He drags his nose down the side of my face to my neck and breathes deep, "I need a moment to calm myself down."

I don't ask him why he wants to calm down. It's probably for the best that he stopped us before anything else happened; maybe the singing and dancing made me a little too relaxed. I still can't believe I took his shirt off.

"You have no idea how beautiful you are." His words vibrate against my throat, sending shivers up my spine. "Kyouko, you are my princess and I want to treat you better than _he_ did. I don't want you to come home just to cook and clean for me, especially after you've been working all day. I want you to feel comfortable with me, and I don't want you to think you have to do things you're not ready for in order to make me happy."

I bite my lip, wondering if I should tell him the truth. What would he say if he knew that his young, naïve girlfriend wanted to have sex with him? _Is_ that even what I want? I exhale, feeling relieved that he had the good sense to stop me. Who knows what I might have ended up doing if he didn't.

"Hey, say something." His soft lips press to my forehead, as he pushes my hair behind my ear.

I kiss his lips gently, reminding myself to relax. "I love you," I declare, my heart pounding in my chest. Despite his frequent proclamations of love, I'm still terrified of being rejected, just like when I was little and _she_ would slap my hands away.

A broad smile lights up his face, and he pulls me into a passionate kiss. I squeak the color rising in my cheeks, and push against his chest.

"Now you blush and act shy?" I turn away from him, feeling overwhelmed. The singing _definitely_ relaxed me too much. Making out with my boyfriend and declaring my love for him is too much. "Do you want your present now?" All traces of the Emperor now gone, he tries to soothe my nerves with a tender kiss to my temple.

I nod, accepting his comfort gratefully. For a moment, he leaves me, returning with the box from earlier. It looks expensive all by itself, and I'm a little nervous about what's inside of it. I lift the lid after he sets it in my lap, finding a dozen red and white roses. They aren't as big as queen Rosa, but they're lovely just the same. As I'm admiring their pretty petals he excuses himself, filling a vase with water and swapping the movie.

"They're just flowers," he says, seeing my face as I'm about to ask him how much they cost. "Let me have my fun and spend my own money how I like."

I smile wryly, biting back my words of protest. "Thank you," I tell him, instead of scolding him about being responsible like I want to.

I settle back down on the couch for our next movie, and Ren heads to the kitchen for more popcorn, and some chocolate. I would prefer something more substantial, but he's adamant that we can't eat real food when watching movies.

"Why do you like Beauty and the Beast?" I ask when he walks back to the couch, remote in hand.

I accept the popcorn he holds to my lips, as he shrugs and replies, "I like Belle."

"Oh." I am not jealous of a cartoon character. "I mean she's cute, I guess."

A snort escapes him and he tugs on a lock of my hair. "Yeah, she is, for a cartoon, but that isn't why I like her." Motioning for me to move closer to him, he leans in, pressing his mouth to my ear. "I like smart girls." I am paralyzed by his warm breath in my ear, unable to push him away. "Like a girl who gets perfect scores in every subject on her entrance exams. To me that's sexy."

"Mmm." I push weakly against his chest.

"Kyouko?" He turns my head with his hand on my chin.

"What?"

"Would you like me to behave myself now?" Pouting, I nod as much as I can with him holding my face. He releases me and reclines against the couch, motioning for me to lean against him. I obey, enjoying the feeling of strong arms embracing me as he presses play.

As the movie plays he whispers the male lines to me, and somehow even Gaston's self-absorbed proposal sounds comforting coming from Ren. I close my eyes, drifting into a half sleep, listening to him tell me about the kids we're going to have. My mind conjures up the image of a little girl with raven hair in pigtails. She laughs as I watch over her, the both of us waiting for her father and brother to come home.

At first, I don't notice anything strange about her eyes, thinking they're a beautiful shade of green. It isn't until her older brother appears beside her, seemingly out of thin air, that I question who these children could belong to. I thought they were mine, but how could that be when the little boy is blonde? Large hands pull me into a warm embrace, and I take in Ren's scent, only it isn't Ren I find when I look up.

"Corn?" I open my eyes to a blank screen. The familiar scent of my boyfriend still surrounds me, along with his arms.

"Yes, Princess?" One of his hands is in my hair cradling my head against his shoulder, the other hand rubbing soothing circles against my back.

"What time is it?" I reach for my phone on the table, answering my own question. It's past midnight, almost one o'clock. "We should go to bed." He starts to speak, but is interrupted by a loud growl from my stomach.

"You should have eaten more popcorn and candy," he jokes, bopping my head with one of the bars of chocolate he grabbed for me.

"Not all of us can survive on the bare minimum. Even if I ate all of it, I'd still be hungry." Still, I accept the candy from him, eating it just to dull the urgency of my hunger.

"I'm sorry I don't have anything of substance here. Give me a minute, and I'll get you something from the store." He rushes out before I have a chance to stop him. I'd have liked to go with, but I know he'd only convince me to stay here, most likely so I can't complain about how much he spends.

I blush, feeling spoiled as I arrange my roses in the vase, making a ring of white roses and filling it in with red. My mind wanders to my dream, leaving me wonder why it was with Corn and his children. I know that with those green eyes, and the boy's shimmering gold hair, they could only belong to the fairy prince.

"Why didn't he question it when I woke up and called him Corn?" I wonder aloud, willing fairies to come from the flowers, so someone could answer my question. Did he respond to me because he was sleeping too?

I spend the rest of the night replaying the dream and my waking up from it over in my head. We prepare a small meal together, with Ren needing to feel like he's helping despite not being allowed to cook anything. He sets the table as always, and prepares the ingredients with me. We both know he's terrible at it, but I never tell him so. His eyes watch my hands, mimicking my movements, and becoming more proficient every time. I feel proud of myself, getting him to eat a proper meal before bed, even though I'm so distracted.

Something is off about the guest room, but with my mind preoccupied, I can't seem to tell what. That is, until I take in the smell of fresh paint, and the plushness of the carpet.

Pushing aside the white curtains, I climb into bed and lay my head down on the royal blue silk pillow. My eyes fly open and I sit up, taking in the unfamiliar surroundings.

"Ren!" I throw back the silk covers and jump out of bed.

"Yes?" He's at the door with _that_ damned grin on his face, the one that screams innocence, when he knows exactly what he did.

"What did you do to the guest room?" I point at the newly painted walls, the new carpet, the day bed sitting where a couch used to be, and finally, I direct his attention to the large bed in the center of the redecorated room. It's truly magnificent, and looks like something from a fairy tale. A bed fit for a princess, I realize, touching the lace curtains hanging from the bed posts.

"I didn't do anything to your room." My disbelief must show on my face, as he hides his amusement behind a serious expression. "Honest, I don't know how to paint a room or replace carpet. Now, if you don't like it, I can pay the people I hired to change it back."

"Ren." I close my eyes, resting my head against the closest bedpost. One of his large hands pats me gently on the head, and I sigh. "I'm going to bed, get out."

"Don't be mad, Kyouko." He snakes his arms around me and I give up. Why should I bother to control his spending when he's determined to put himself in the poor house? I lean back into him, reveling in the feel of his lips on my forehead.

"Thank you. Even though turning the guestroom into a fairy tale bedroom was an irresponsible waste of money, it was very sweet." Kissing the corner of his mouth, I push him slightly. "I really am tired, though."

"Goodnight Princess." He kisses my cheek before leaving, and I climb back onto the bed, falling back exhausted, I try to make myself relax.

"I can't believe I took his shirt off." Hiding my face in my hands, I roll over, pulling the covers around me. I don't even want to acknowledge the ornate new lamp to shut it off. "Stupid rich boyfriend without a frugal bone in his body." I close my eyes, falling back into my dream about Corn and his children.

 **A/N: Thank you all for the reviews. I'd like reply to some of them but answering those questions might give away secrets for further chapters. The Bo and Ren thing will be addressed soon. That's all I'm saying. Thank you unicornforcewinds for being an awesome Beta.**


	17. Won't Say I'm In Love

"Do you prefer a western breakfast?" I ask, placing my eggs on a plate. In my dream, Corn ate his eggs with bacon, toast, and pancakes, with orange juice to drink.

"I don't prefer anything, if you tell me to eat it I will," Ren answers, carrying the food I've prepared over to the table.

"But if you were to choose a specific food to eat, would it be Japanese, or from somewhere else?" I pause, thinking of different countries. "Like America or England."

"I like whatever you make for me. I'm a simple man, if my girl makes me eggs and miso soup for breakfast, I eat eggs and miso soup for breakfast. If you make me a roast chicken for supper I will eat as much of it as you tell me to."

Why is this bothering me so much? "Is there nothing you like eating? No favorite food from childhood?" I close my mouth, watching him pick at his food. He's never going to tell me about his past.

"My mother couldn't cook." Ren confesses, cheeks turning pink. "Along with her looks, I also inherited the bad cooking gene, unfortunately. Since I'm not very good at it myself, and I was often forced to ingest her cooking, I admit I developed an unhealthy relationship with food. I'm sorry." I didn't expect him to talk about his mom, it's rare for him to say anything about his family.

"Maybe I could teach her." My words sound like a nervous question.

"Maybe," he agrees, but he doesn't sound sure. Is there some reason he's keeping me away from his parents? "Don't get your hopes up though, she's even more hopeless than I am; can't even use a microwave without starting a fire."

"Oh." Something tells me not to pry further, he won't like it if I ask too many questions.

"On the other hand," he tells me, "my father loves to cook." I perk up, pleased and surprised he's willingly telling me more. "I can imagine the two of you making all kinds of food, that you'll no doubt force me to eat."

"When will I meet them?" I ask tentatively, hoping that I'm not pushing him too much.

"You don't have to be afraid to ask me questions," he assures, not actually answering the question. We eat our food and he insists on cleaning up by himself before we head to the car.

"Should we talk about last night?" I ask when we are almost at LME.

"Last night? You'll have to be more specific. Do you mean my awful singing, or the part where you stripped me?" I cringe at his words, recalling the warmth of his bare skin beneath my fingers, of his muscular chest rising and falling as I drifted off to sleep.

"I did not!" I cry, trying to erase the memory of my thigh rubbing against the hardening length in his pants. Thankfully, he isn't bringing _that_ up. "You're right, I did. I'm sorry! I'm a despicable, wanton woman. I'm sorry, Tsuruga-san." What an impure girl I have become.

"Stop apologizing. I was only teasing, and it's Ren in private." He parks the care and takes my hand, lifting it to his lips. "You have nothing to be sorry for." He strokes my cheek with his finger, and I'm sure my face is deep red. "There's nothing despicable about you. You're adorable." I stiffen at his words, he'd called Bo adorable too. Noticing how rigid I've become, he leans over me to kiss my temple. "I love you and only you."

We get out of the car, and he walks me to the Love Me room. Once inside, I take his hand, bringing it to my cheek. There's a need to not part with him, an overwhelming urge to always stay close to him.

"I love you too." I raise myself up on my toes to kiss the corner of his mouth, but he turns his head and captures my lips in his. "Ren!" I pull away burying my head in his chest trying not to die of embarrassment.

"Really, after last night, I didn't think a little kiss would bother you." Caressing my cheeks, he whispers, "I love it when you blush like that."

"Bully." I pout, but accept his lips when he leans down for a chaste kiss.

"Yeah, but I'm a bully who worships you; so it evens out." He steals another kiss before the door behind him opens, shoving us further into the room.

"Okay, you're done. She's mine now, leave," Kanae growls, entering the room.

"Good morning to you too, Kotonami-san," Ren greets her politely, despite her rudeness and the annoyed gleam in her eyes.

"Don't you have a job to get to?" Kanae demands, crossing her arms.

Unperturbed by her attitude, Ren smiles at us. "You two have a nice day together. I have to go meet up with Yashiro-san. We'll be here to take you to TBM later, so don't disappear this time." With a quick kiss to my cheek, he leaves us and I turn on Kanae.

"Moko-san!" She opens her locker, blocking my embrace. "Ow, my head!" I pout, rubbing the spot where it hit me. "You're being so mean, Moko-san."

"Time for work," Kanae smiles, pulling on her uniform.

We spend the day cleaning offices and filing paper work until lunch, when I check my phone, smiling at the message from Ren.

"Can I have ten minutes with you, without the overrated actor?" Kanae pushes my phone closed as she asks this.

"I'm sorry Moko-san." I've been texting him questions all day, unsatisfied with the little snippets he told me about his parents. I set the phone down, intending to give Kanae my full attention, but my fingers have a mind of their own, flipping it open as we attempt to have a conversation about work.

Fingers gliding across the keyboard, I type a quick message and set it back down, sending Kanae an apologetic smile. I really want to know more about his parents. His reply interrupts Kanae, asking me if I've been practicing for my upcoming fight scenes, and her jaw clenches as she motions for me to check my phone. I regret it immediately, there's no mistaking his words for anything but annoyance.

I've pressed the matter of his past too much it seems, his text saying simply, _I'm working._ I can hear the exasperated tone; see the dark look in his eyes telling me to quit asking. Tsuruga-san is fed up with my questions, but my fingers itch to keep asking them. I feel like his girlfriend should know the things that the public doesn't, like his real name or where he grew up. How can we get closer if I don't know anything about his personal life?

He either didn't have any happy childhood memories, or he didn't have a childhood at all, I decide. It's as if he woke up one day and was the fully grown Tsuruga Ren.

I know I'm being nosey and rude, but I can't help it, I want to know everything there is to know about him. I want to see pictures of him when he was little, and meet the father who taught him to be so careless with money.

"What's wrong?" Kanae's eyes shown genuine concern, despite her annoyance at being ignored for Ren.

It makes me sad to admit out loud that my relationship has some serious problems. We love each other, so it shouldn't be this hard to connect.

"Tsuruga-san has secrets and he lies, and you're right, he does trick me into agreeing to things." I'm a terrible girlfriend for playing up Kanae's dislike for him, just so she'll comfort me. "If I had a happy memory to share with him I would, but he's keeping all of his happy memories to himself. I asked him where he grew up, he answers with, _'I came to Tokyo when I was fifteen. My life before then, is something I can't think about now.'_ Can you believe him?"

I expect her to become furious, so I'll end up defending him. It would certainly help for me to remind myself of all his good points. "Admitting to me that he's been lying and hiding things, but he gets mad at me for asking him questions. I even confessed my love to him when he asked me to."

"He didn't say any of that to you." Kanae picks at her salad, with a look on her face that tells me I'm in for a scolding. "You keep pretending to be someone else, and he tells that person things. Tell him the truth; then maybe he'll share with you."

"But Moko-san, I have a reason for not telling him about Bo. There can't be a reason that he won't talk about his parents with me. Unless he thinks they won't like me." I spill my insecurity to her, and a sympathetic look briefly flashes on her face. Tears fill my eyes and I rub them roughly, hating that I can't just bring myself to open up to him more.

"Tell him about Bo." I shake my head, no. "Then I don't want to hear you whine about his secrets."

Pouting, I return my attention to my phone. _Can I still come over for dinner tonight?_ I hit send, deciding this is a question it's okay to ask.

"Look, maybe it's because you haven't been dating very long. He probably isn't ready to share every detail of his life with you." Kanae explains, covering my hand before I can flip my phone to check the reply. "Or, because he knows about your parents, he doesn't want to gloat and make you feel bad when he had a perfectly happy childhood." When she puts it like that, I feel selfish. "You, on the other hand, are only lying to him out of fear that he'll be angry, which I doubt he will."

"Moko-san, aren't you supposed to be on my side? You don't even like Tsuruga-san." It's unusual for her to defend him like this. Still, trying to work her up so she'll bad mouth him is even worse than having wanton thoughts about him. I really am a despicable human being.

"Yet, I have to have multiple conversations about him daily." She gripes, finishing her salad and tossing the empty container in the trash.

"Oh." I rest my head on the table quietly, taking the hint.

Kanae releases a heavy sigh and rests her hand on my head. "Isn't it fine for now to just be with him? Eventually you'll both work up the nerve to reveal your secrets; then you'll be so relieved you'll wonder why you were so ridiculously afraid in the first place."

My phone ringing interrupts us. I answer it cheerfully without checking who it is, hoping it's Ren.

"I thought I told you to call me." A mature voice says, sounding annoyed. For a moment, I'm confused as to who it could be. "Hello Kyouko-chan, how did your date go?"

"Oh, Fujita-san!" The voice clicks in my brain, conjuring up the image of my inappropriate director.

"Yes, that's me. Now give me details, I want to know everything." I open my mouth to tell her that her advice worked, without giving any details. Then my attention flickers to Kanae, and I wonder if I could tell her about last night. Knowing her, she would scold me for letting him trick me. That's how she would see it, Ren as the big bad wolf who lured me into his arms with the promise of safety.

"Umm, well I'm a little busy at the moment. Could I call you back later?" An annoyed grumble drifts through the phone.

"Better yet, why don't you come have tea at my office sometime? You can tell me all about how things are going with you and Tsuruga-san, and I will do my best to advise you."

I would rather talk to Kanae about it, but I can't picture that conversation ending well. She already doesn't like Ren, how much more will she hate him if she thinks he's corrupted me?

"Okay, I'll check with Yashiro-san later to find out when I'm free." Fujita-san agrees, hanging up and leaving me with an agitated Kanae.

"Fujita-san?" She asks, obviously remembering what I told her about the director.

"She wants to meet to go over the script for the next CM," I shrug, thinking it's more convincing than an outright lie.

"Right." Kanae isn't buying it.

After a few more hours of silent work, it's time for us to leave. Kanae says nothing to me as we change back into our street clothes, but I can feel her eyes on me.

"Kyouko-chan, Kotonami-san," Yashiro-san greets us warmly, here to pick me up for my work at TBM. Out of habit, my eyes drift behind him and to the side, searching of my boyfriend. "You know you could greet me first, before showing such a disappointed face." He pouts, my attention turning to him. "Since we are dating according to the media."

"Excuse me, Yashiro-san, good evening." I spit out with a quick bow, but my rude eyes betray me when they once again land on the empty space behind him.

"Ren's not here." He supplies, seeming more amused than annoyed by my lack of courtesy. "He's running a little behind at work today, and I was sent to deliver the two of you safely to your next assignments." I want to ask if something went wrong, but I don't want to appear too concerned.

"Right, the two of us. I'm so sure he put my wellbeing into consideration when he sent you." Moko-san snarls while gathering her things.

"Ren is a very considerate person, Kotonami-san, especially of young women, and even more so of young actresses. You get bonus points since you are Kyouko's friend, so he thinks about your health and safety more than others." Kanae scoffs as we follow him out to the car.

"You mean he thinks of me because he wants this one to be happy," she concludes, jerking her thumb in my direction. "Basically, he thinks of me as a favored toy of hers or something." I know her irritation stems from our argument about secrets, so I do my best to keep quiet as she rants in the front seat about annoying actors. It takes all my efforts to bite my tongue and not defend Tsuruga-san against her accusations.

"Moko-san," When we stop in front of her destination I stop her from exiting the car. "I'm sorry."

Her eyes narrow at me for a moment. "No, you're not." I flinch, feeling as if her words are meant to hurt me. "If you were, you'd stop lying. To him and to me. What are you so afraid of Kyouko? Do you have so little faith in me that you think I would stop being your friend, because you didn't take my advice?" Her voice wavers but I can't think of anything to say before she leaves. I open my mouth to speak several times bidding the perfect words that can fix this to form on my tongue. Nothing comes to mind and Kanae says goodbye to Yashiro-san but not me.

"Are you two fighting?" Yashiro-san asks, using the mirror to look back at me. Remembering a different pair of eyes connecting with mine through the mirror, I flush.

"No, not really." Although, I wonder if we are. Is it because I called Fujita-san for advice, or because I lied about it? Or, is she only mad because I won't tell Ren about Bo?

Yashiro-san drops me off at TBM where I am greeted by a sullen Yuusei-san and Shinichi-san.

"Good evening Yuusei-san, Shinichi-san." I bow to them, curious at their annoyed expressions.

"Tsuruga-san's girlfriend is here, Hikaru-san." Shinichi-san announces, walking off with Yuusei-san following close beside.

"Hikaru-san, are they mad at me?"

"Sorry, it's my fault." He smiles sheepishly, as we walk to the backroom where Bo is waiting. He leaves while I get dressed, returning with the producer, who's smiling from ear to ear.

"I expect you to be on your best behavior for this guest. When I told Hikaru-san to convince him to be on the show, I never thought he'd actually be able to get him. It's so exciting, and I hear that you had something to do with it. Good job, both of you." He gives me a pat on the head, but I can't make sense of his praise. What is it he thinks I did?

I look to Hikaru-san for an explanation. "That's my fault too," he admits, holding his hands up. "I took advantage of the situation and I'm sorry, jealousy is a strange emotion." The more words he speaks, the more confused I become. "He's a really big star and extremely difficult to get on such short notice. His schedule is booked months in advance and I was hurt, so I thought that I could use your connection to get him on the show. No, that's a lie. I expected him to refuse, and then you'd know what kind of guy he really is. Except he agreed, and now I know what kind of man he really is because we talked for a long time, and I think we're friends now. I'm not completely sure about that."

I blink at him trying, to comprehend anything he said. "Who?"

Scratching his head, he motions behind me, "Tsuruga-san."

"Hey." Electric shocks run through my body at the sound of his voice. Why is he here?

"Tsuruga-san, why are you here?" My heart beats rapidly as he walks closer. "How are you here?" Yashiro-san hasn't been gone long enough to have returned with him.

"He's been here." Shinichi sneers, walking up behind Ren. "I don't know who's worse, his new girlfriend or his new best friend." He rolls his eyes as Hikaru-san runs up to Ren with a slight blush.

"Tsuruga-san, I thought you were going to wait in your room." Hikaru-san walks over to him, but Ren ignores him, eyes trained on me.

"I came to see you, of course." He says casually, that damned smile on his face as he moves closer to me.

Stop looking at me like that. "Tsuruga-san, I don't think it's appropriate for you to come here anymore." I huff crossing my wings. "Why don't you go flirt with your girlfriend."

"You sound jealous." Ren smirks leaning in close to whisper to me. "Don't worry I still have time for you." The way he says it makes me shiver. I can almost feel his words caressing me in places no one ever has before.

"What the hell?" I slap a feather covered hand over my mouth, fighting the jealousy. Ren chuckles, standing at his full height. "We have to get to work now. I don't think your girlfriend would approve of you slacking off with us."

"What do you mean?" He drops his smile, becoming the serious hard working Tsuruga Ren. "The hosts of the show requested me themselves, since I have never been on before and we are such good friends."

"Oh." My eyes fall to the sheepish Hikaru-san standing behind him. "OH!" The implications hit me full force and I panic. What exactly was said during the long talk Hikaru-san said they had? Did he reveal who I am? I bet he did, and now my bully boyfriend is messing with me, but that doesn't explain why he was flirting before. Tsuruga-san, please stop confusing me!

"Next question, what has been your favorite role so far?" Hikaru-san reads, pulling the slip of paper from a plastic egg.

I look around, wondering how we got on stage. I don't even remember bringing the basket over for Ren to choose from. My mind is too preoccupied with the thought that he either must know I'm Bo and he's punishing me. Or he really does have a crush on the girl in the Bo costume. I really don't know which I prefer. On the one hand he's pissed at me, and on the other he has no qualms about flirting with other girls behind my back.

"Hmm? I couldn't choose just one. I enjoyed every character I've had the opportunity to portray." The audience, made up of mostly teen girls and young women, coos at him.

"Really, you can't think of one role that is special to you?" Yuusei-san asks, and I'm perplexed by the annoyance in his voice. Even if they hated Ren, they know to remain professional on stage.

"I heard that you fought hard for the role of Katsuki; there's a rumor that you were almost fired from Dark Moon. It's said that a fellow cast member helped you out, and that the two of you grew close as a result." Shinichi-san presses Ren, and I think even the audience has noticed the hostility coming from him and Yuusei-san.

"I really enjoyed being Katsuki. That whole story was filled with twists and turns and he was a pretty complicated character. It certainly wasn't easy to portray him, but there wasn't a specific cast member who helped me, we all helped each other." Ren doesn't question where they heard the gossip, or show any sign that their aggression bothers him. He answers them politely, and I do my part to help by handing another egg to Hikaru-san. "I can assure you that I was never in any danger of losing that role."

"Next question?" Hikaru-san asks me, looking between his co-hosts and Ren. "Oh, uh someone in the audience had a lot to say. Are you dating Kyouko-chan?" He holds up a finger signaling that Ren should wait to answer. "If you are, I want to say that the two of you are the cutest thing ever. She's adorable and I loved your chemistry in Dark Moon." Our chemistry? Is this person not aware that we were enemies? "If you aren't dating her, then ask her out because she is the most adorable actress I have ever seen, and she deserves better than a manager."

"What's wrong with Yashiro-san?" Ren asks looking at me as though he expects me to answer. I shrug, pulling out a pair of false reading glasses that I use in skits sometimes. "See, Bo wears glasses and I think he's a good-looking chicken." The comment gets the audience to laugh as I don the glasses and pose for them to see how good I look in them.

"Kyouko-san." I jump, hearing him say my name a little too softly. "She is a lovely girl and a very talented actress. Our relationship is not romantic; however, we are friends." Don't say it like that. When you look so wistful it makes the fans think that you like me. "I hope that she continues to have fans who adore her like the one who asked the question. To add to that, she isn't dating our manager either. The three of us are busy, career-oriented people, and she's still in high school."

A chorus of 'aws' resounds from the crowd of women, but I have no time to be annoyed with them as I'm obligated to react along with them, performing my mascot duties.

"Then you're not seeing anyone at the moment?" Shinichi-san confirms, and I bite my tongue. I want to give him a thorough lashing for not letting the subject drop.

"No, there's no one special in my life at the moment." My heart twitches, even though I know it's what he has to say.

"If only there were a way to prove it, I just don't believe that you at least don't harbor feelings for Kyouko-chan." Shinichi-san presses, and I watch in horror as Ren's gentleman smile brightens.

"Shinichi, stop." I hear Hikaru-san whisper.

"What if he kisses someone else?" Yuusei-san asks, ignoring the look Hikaru-san gives him. "That might convince us."

"Yeah, since you are so set on denying you are in a relationship, I dare you to kiss someone in this room." I can't believe the words came out of his mouth. Has he gone mad? Why are they pushing this so hard? If Ren gets upset and complains, it'll be us who are punished.

Hikaru-san steps between Shinichi and Ren. "Sorry Tsuruga-san, they're joking."

"No, I'm not. If he won't claim her, than he doesn't deserve her. Why are you being passive about this? You don't think he deserves her either." Yuusei-san comes over to hold onto Shinichi's arm before he can attack Ren.

"This is a little much." Yuusei-san whispers as Shinichi-san struggles to free himself. "Stop now."

"No. If Tsuruga-san doesn't have a girlfriend, then he's free to kiss another girl. I don't think anyone in the audience will object." The audience sits in shocked silence, as they watch one of their beloved hosts losing his senses on stage.

"Calm down, Shinichi." Hikaru-san tries again, but Shinichi doesn't hear him.

"I just don't understand what she would see in a guy like you, who denies her existence to protect his reputation." Shinichi-san seethes, breaking away from Yuusei-san and jabbing Ren in the chest. "Come on, do you have a girlfriend or not? Kyouko-chan means nothing to you, right? She isn't the least bit special to you!"

I stand off to the side, watching the audience get ready to jump in. I've seen how scary rabid fans can be, and it won't be good for us if Tsuruga Ren is seen being treated badly. Somehow, I need to turn this into a joke.

Praying he'll play along, I waddle over to Ren and present my beak for him to kiss.

 **A/N: Thank you for the reviews! Just to clarify, Ren wasn't talking about their children together when Kyouko fell asleep. He was saying lines from Beauty and the Beast, there is a scene in which Gaston talks about having children. Belle of course is appropriately disgusted by this but Kyouko was only listening to Ren's voice and focusing on relaxing, so she didn't think much of the dream until she realized it was Corn.**


	18. Beheaded Chicken

Bo turns tomato red and falls to the floor with a dramatic flair. The audience laughs, not because they instantly believe that everything is fine, they're smarter than that, but they are here to enjoy the show. No one wants to watch the hosts they love fighting with the guest they also love.

"Oh, wow Bo! Tsuruga-san I think you killed him." Hikaru-san jumps, in as Yuusei-san fans Bo with an oversized paper fan. "Well, we can't let this chicken go to waste, should we eat him?" Yuusei-san folds the fan into a large paper knife and looks at Hikaru-san.

"Bo usually does the cooking." They both turn to me. "Can you cook?"

"Not well." I answer, the three of us turning to Shinichi. He glares at us and walks backstage, refusing to play along. "I guess it's up to us. Here, give me the knife."

We turn back to Bo, who's trying to sneak away. "Our dinner is escaping, Tsuruga-san." Hikaru tells me.

Bo squawks, running away from us as we chase her with the giant knife.

"Come on, I'm hungry," I say, knowing her too well. She stops for a moment, forgetting where we are, and almost turns around to question my odd statement. Of course, there's no way I would ever say those words, and she knows that.

With another squawk, she takes off running again; just before Hikaru catches her. Unfortunately for her, I'm standing on the opposite side. She collides into me, bringing both of us to the ground. I laugh as she struggles to stand back up, wobbling around on me in her plush chicken suit.

"Tsuruga-san, hold Bo still." Hikaru rushes over with paper knife. "I'll cut his head off and cook a feast for you." Suddenly she is on her knees, wings folded in front of her begging me to save her.

"Oh, sweetheart," my tongue slips, my hand unconsciously reaching out to pat her head. I couldn't help myself she just looked so sad. The audience reacts with coos but Bo freezes, wide chicken eyes staring at me in pained shock.

I'm saved by the commercial announcement from Hikaru, and we all immediately head backstage, where I spot Shinichi being scolded by the producer. Yuusei and Hikaru rush over to stand by him.

I know Hikaru-san likes Kyouko, but don't they think they went too far? Those two were acting like overprotective big brothers, and the thought that I am the only big brother she'll ever need slips into my mind. It's a sick thought, but one that I can fully blame on the president. He couldn't make Setsu my manager or my girlfriend, no, she had to be my sister. My sweet, provocative, and dangerously brother-obsessed sister.

"Tsuruga-san?" I perk up at her voice, before realizing my eyes have been raking over the plump chicken-suit, like a starved man ready to eat. Why can't I stop thinking about her like that? It clearly makes her uncomfortable, but my mind drifts there anyway. "Tsuruga-san, don't look at me like that."

"I'm sorry." My heart breaks hearing the pain in her voice. I'm an asshole for playing with her for so long, why did I think it would be a good idea to tease her?

Bo turns away from me, and I can tell by the sound of her voice she's biting back tears. "You can't look at me like that. I don't think your girlfriend would like it very much if she saw you looking at someone else like that."

"Sorry." I know I should just tell her, but for some reason I'm afraid. Once her secret is out, I might have to tell her mine. Could she still love me after she learns all about the beast hiding beneath my skin?

"You're still looking at me." She whines, her large chicken eyes becoming strangely misty.

"Sorry," I repeat, trying to think of something else to say. I stare down at her, knowing that beneath the chicken head she is crying; thinking I have a crush on some other girl. Hikaru interrupts, walking over to us with a hopeful look on his face.

"Could you help us please." He motions to the producer, who is still berating my bullies. I nod and head over to them.

"Thank you," I say with a bow. "I didn't expect to have so much fun appearing on your show, and I think our skit entertained the audience well. Bo is really talented; I can see why you want to keep her so much. Yashiro-san told me about the offer."

The producer swallows hard. "That was confidential, I haven't even spoken to her yet." That's because Yukihito told him to make a better offer. He wants to keep her but he isn't willing to pay her what she's worth.

"Offer?" Shinichi looks confused as the producer flushes with anger. Evidently the guys weren't supposed to know Bo was being offered a raise. Oops.

"Bo is becoming more and more famous, and pretty soon she'll outgrow your show. Your producer here wants to ensure that she'll stay, but he isn't willing to give her what she deserves to make that happen. That's between her, Yashiro, and him though. I do know that Yashiro was displeased by your offer." I've probably said too much, but if it gives these guys someone to be angry with besides me, then I don't mind sacrificing the producer. He needs to be taken down a peg or two anyway, not only was he rude to Yukihito, but he said that Kyouko was expendable. An obvious bluff, considering he still wants her to take the offer.

I watch the two men turn on their producer, asking him why he won't offer Bo whatever it takes to keep her. I saunter away, a satisfied grin on my face. It won't be long now, even though, knowing her, she probably won't ask for anything more than offered. Still, it will be good for him to squirm a little, that will teach him to call my girl expendable.

Hikaru-san shakes his head at me, and I know he's thinking that I'm despicable. Somehow the guy managed to make me like him, even knowing that he has a crush on my girlfriend. He would be a better choice for her than me; it was Hikaru that explained to me what normal people do on dates. He didn't even tease me or make me feel awkward about being a grown man and never having a real girlfriend before. With essentially no one besides Yukihito and the president, who would both have been completely unhelpful, I was left with few options. I'd been considering Kijima and a few other guys I've worked with before, when Hikaru-san asked if he could talk to me.

"I just had an idea," he says suddenly, dragging the chicken over to me. "Bo, entertain Tsuruga-san until I come back."

"Hey, wait!" She reaches out for him, but he runs away too quickly for her to chase him in the chicken suit. "The commercial break doesn't last that long."

I've known who Bo is for quite some time now, and I guess that's my signal to come clean. She made it so obvious, that I was disappointed in myself for not noticing it sooner. They had the same mannerisms and her voice was poorly disguised.

"Stop looking at me." The stern voice does little to cover the tears she can't contain.

"Why should I?" I take half a step towards her, hands touching the plush chicken head. Inquisitive plastic eyes look at me as I gently lift the head of the costume up. "I like looking at you, Kyouko."

She trembles as I discard the head, and her eyes clamp shut, refusing to look at me.

"I'm sorry." The anguish in her voice startles me, and I can feel her heart aching, probably fearing my anger. My hands cup her face, wiping at the tears that trickle-down her cheeks.

"Shh," my thumbs brush over her eye lids coaxing them open. "Don't cry sweetheart."

"You're not mad at me?" Her voice quivers.

"Yes, I am." She flinches, shutting her eyes against the harsh words she expects me to say. "I'm very angry that you are too afraid to look at me. I'm mad that I seem to have the image of a terrible, overbearing brute in your mind. I'm mildly annoyed that you thought I didn't already know it was you inside that costume."

Peeking up at me, she mumbles a wary, "oh."

"Oh? Is that all you have to say?" My hands slide down to rest on her puffy chicken shoulders.

"How did you find out? When did you find out?" She keeps her eyes trained on the floor.

I sigh, contemplating how to answer her questions. "When I came here to tell you that I was going to confess my love to... well, you, do you remember what I said?"

"Yes, you gave this long ranting speech about how great your girl was; how she was smart and good at cooking and on and on with the praises. Half of which weren't even true, and some made no sense." Her head tilts to the side in thought. "It reminded me of someone a little."

"Everything I said that night was true. Do you remember what you said to me?" She shakes her head, her brows scrunching together.

"I didn't say much of anything…" She trails off, and I can tell that she's trying to recall the details of the conversation. "What did I say?"

Wickedly I smile, wanting to play with her some more. "Not telling." I tease, earning a pretty pout.

"Ren, if you don't tell me, I'll be wracking my brain for weeks trying to figure out the answer." She flaps her wings frantically, desperate for answers.

"Pay the toll, and I'll tell you whatever you want." I tap my lips and watch her go from flustered to annoyed.

"You were flirting with Bo on purpose to hurt me." Kyouko accuses, crossing her wings, and turning her head up in a huff. "Maybe _I_ should be mad at _you_."

"I wasn't trying to hurt you, just make you a little jealous. You're cute when you get clingy and possessive, that's all I wanted." A large wing presses over my face, silencing me.

"I don't want to hear it. You and your excuses piss me off." I raise my hands in surrender, knowing that I really hurt her.

"Tsuruga-san!" Hikaru comes running, his face beat red. He can hardly catch his breath as he comes over to me, a chicken meal in his hands. "Bo, go get your Halloween costume on, hurry up."

"Hikaru-san, I already ate." I try to get out of eating the extra-large meal, but one look from Kyouko tells me that I have to finish it all.

I sigh, and we head back to the stage as Kyouko rushes off to get changed. She comes back wearing a ghostly version of Bo, and I do my best to stifle a laugh. The other Ishibashis remain backstage, as we seat ourselves at a table set for two.

"We're so close we have candle light dinners together now?" I ask Hikaru, watching Kyouko get into character of ghost Bo. He's impressively scary, but cute at the same time. His feathers are pale blue with deep, blue hollow eyes.

"Well, we did just murder a chicken together," Hikaru answers, and Shinichi walks out dressed like a butler. Yuusei follows him, carrying an empty costume.

When the cameras begin to roll, and the audience has returned, Yuusei and Shinichi pretend to have a Bo funeral while the ghost Bo watches on mourning. It seems to amuse the audience quite a bit, especially when Bo tries to leap back into the chicken body. Then, Bo turns on me, as Shinichi serves dinner for us and Yuusei joins in eating half the meal. Bo pretends to strangle me every time one of the hosts asks me a question, and I can't help but think that my girlfriend is really plotting to kill me.

We have a jovial conversation in which I promote upcoming projects, one of them being the commercial I did with Kyouko.

"I won't lie, it was fun to film. She's really shy and I have a bad habit of teasing her for that." I've been planting the seeds of a crush in the audiences' minds, but never forget to remind them how young she is. Soon the majority of my fans will be rooting for me to get the girl. "She is only seventeen, but surprisingly professional for her age."

"The second CM just came out. It's a bit more risqué, did you find it awkward to film that with a friend?" Hikaru asks, and I shoot him a look, feeling a little betrayed. Didn't we just go through this? "I hear that those kinds of scenes can be a nightmare to film, especially if the other person is a friend."

"Yeah, they can be. The cameras are on you, and the director is ordering you to be sexy but not too much, and you're both trying not to laugh." We banter for a while more, before I turn to Bo and pat the chicken's head. "I'm sorry." I lean in, kissing the ghostly, blue beak. "Hopefully that will bring you back to life."

She's still mad at me. After filming I agree to sign autographs with the hosts, but Bo vanishes back stage. She doesn't speak to me when we finish, and make our way back there ourselves. Her eyes make a point to never land on me.

"You're going to have to talk to me sometime." I say, gathering my things just as Yashiro appears from around the corner. I assume he's just arrived to pick us up, and he seems annoyed too, but I pretend not to notice. One argument at a time.

"Hikaru-san," she bows to him. "I'll be heading home now. Where are Shinichi-san and Yuusei-san? I need to say goodbye to them as well." He directs her to the waiting room, and she takes off.

"I need to go speak to the producer again, excuse me." Yukihito announces, throwing a glare in my direction. I guess he received a call during the show.

"You sure know how to make people angry." Hikaru whistles as though he's impressed. "I have to admit I'm jealous."

"Jealous? The girl I love is probably plotting my demise, and my closest friend won't speak to me until tomorrow, when he blows up at me while driving. It's happened before and I was scared for my life. He needs to learn how to keep his eyes on the road while yelling." Last time he was squealing like a crazed fan over some miniscule thing he imagined happening between Kyouko and me.

"Still, those two care about you a lot, despite you telling me that you never really figured out how to connect with other people." He looks up at me, and I feel bad for be unable to let go of Kyouko. She deserves someone like him.

"You think I was lying to gain sympathy? I honestly don't have a clue how to behave around her; that's why she's angry. I'm a selfish man, a monster that you should save her from." I admit, feeling like trash just thinking about all the ways I've already defiled her. If someone doesn't save Kyouko soon, who knows what I'll do next time she lets her guard down.

Hikaru laughs, shaking his head at me. "That girl looks at you as if you created the stars and the moon, and the way she talks about you, it's as if she believes you make the sun rise just for her." I open my mouth to further explain why I am the worst kind of man, but he shushes me. "You look at her the same way, you know. It isn't good to hold someone on a pedestal like that. She's human, same as you. I see no monster here."

If he only knew, but no one does. No one not even Kyouko can ever see me for the thing I really am. I don't think I'm strong enough to survive their rejection, especially hers.

"Let's go." Kyouko says, as she walks passed me, joined by Yukihito.

"Just, you know, be good to her, and try being more honest. I promise it won't be as bad as you think." Hikaru assures before I leave.

"You might have told your manager that you were going to leave early." Yukihito begins to scold me when I enter the car. I did call him, but I guess he didn't get the message. I'm about to apologize, when he turns to glare at Kyouko instead, leaving me confused. "Oh, and you know, that the two of you are secretly dating!" We stare at him wide eyed and at a loss for words. "Yeah, I saw that little exchange between you two during the commercial break. Not to mention Kyouko you shouldn't be calling him Ren so openly. Do you want to be caught?"

"…" Kyouko looks to me, tears in her eyes.

"We can talk about this tomorrow, Yukihito. Kyouko's had a long day." He drives us both home, giving me little chance to speak with her alone. "Hey," I walk her to the door, trying to get her attention. "Hey, don't worry about Yukihito. He's only hurt that we didn't tell him. He'll forgive you by morning." I catch her hand, following her inside.

"Goodnight, sempai." She tries to shove me outside, but I refuse to budge.

"Sempai? Do you have an authority fetish?" She scoffs at me, blushing furiously. "Don't blush, it gives me ideas." I cup her face leaning in close to steal a kiss. This type of behavior is exactly what she needs to be protected from, but I can't help myself.

"Why didn't you tell me you knew I was Bo?" She doesn't fight me when I pull her closer. I slide my hands around her neck and down her back.

"Why didn't you tell me that you are Bo? Our reasons are probably similar." We were both afraid, her of being caught, and me of not having the excuse of a mutual secret to protect my own.

With a heavy sigh, she wraps her arms around my neck, pulling me into a hug. "I was afraid of you."

"Of me? Why are you afraid of me? I'd never hurt you, you know that don't you?" I lift her face, looking into her shimmering eyes. They overflow with tears as she struggles to find the words. "Even if I were angry at you, I couldn't do anything to cause you harm."

"You could leave me." The words slip out in a small broken voice, causing my heart to ache. I pull her into a tight embrace, willing her to feel my heart beating for her.

"No, my love, I could never leave you." She holds onto me just as tightly, and I can feel her tears dampening my shirt. If she knew how expensive it was, she would panic and swear to pay me back. I cradle her head, placing kisses in her hair until she's calmed down and run out of tears.

"I'm sorry, I've ruined your shirt." She mumbles and I have to laugh, she's so adorable.

"It's just a shirt. You're far more important." Though a blush colors her cheeks, her expression is still sad. "I love you, Kyouko. Why did you think you being my friend in the chicken costume would change that?"

She shrugs in that infuriating way she learned from me. "Because I used the chicken to listen to your secrets, and I scolded you. Plus, it's probably embarrassing for someone like you to date a low-level mascot like me."

"You did listen to a lot of my secrets, and you can be quite the bully while in costume. Then again, you also helped me solve a lot of problems, and if it wasn't for you, I'd have never realized why you frustrated me so much." I kiss her nose, hoping to coax a smile out of her. "I can see no reason to be embarrassed about you being Bo. It's a job, one that you like and happen to be very good at. That's something to take pride in."

"I frustrated you?" Of course, that's what she would focus on.

"Yes, you frustrate me. You agitate me and drive me crazy. You're just too damn cute and I couldn't stand not being able to touch you, I just didn't know that's what I wanted at the time." I kiss from her left temple to the right, doing my best to soothe her. I wish we were alone in my apartment, but then that would be risky. It's better for her if I'm forced to remain a gentleman.

"How did you know I was Bo?" I can hear the Taisho chopping something in the kitchen, and Okami speaking to him in a hushed tone. What would she have said if they weren't here? What might I be tempted to do if we were alone? It's too dangerous of me to wonder these things.

"You said that your cooking was better." Curious eyes stare into mine. "I said that my girl cooks the best food I've ever tasted, and you grumbled that yours was better. I told you that she's smart and kind and always there for me when I need her. You said that you'd never seen anyone else besides yourself stick by my side until I was fully recovered."

She bites her lip closing her eyes in embarrassment. "You're right I did say those things. I was rude and spoke highly of myself when I had no right to do so."

"Relax." I tip her chin up and take her lips in mine. Her response is both pleasant and troubling. Her fingers grip my shirt, she leans up to press her mouth firmly to mine, and she moans sweetly. This is definitely more pleasurable than how she reacted before. The troubling part, is that I almost forgot where we are. If it weren't for the Taisho slamming his knife down, I might have shoved her against the closest wall and done something unspeakable.

We disengage quickly, hearing Okami-san walk out of the kitchen. She asks us politely if we've eaten dinner, a gentle but firm reminder that it's late.

"I did, but this one hasn't." I ruffle Kyouko's hair, lightly pushing her to create some space between us. "See you in the morning," I tell her pouting face. "I'll apologize to Yukihito, so don't worry about it."

"Yashiro-san! I forgot to ask him what the producer said." She's so cute when she panics.

"Don't worry about that. He's just trying to pay you more so you'll continue being Bo, but you don't care about the money anyway, just let Yukihito handle it. He'll probably tell you tomorrow anyway." My words calm her somewhat, and she finally gives me a smile.

"Since you aren't staying for dinner," Okami-san starts, and I worry that I've worn out my welcome. The last thing I want if for her landlords to hate me. "I was wondering if you could make some time one night to have a meal with us?" Containing her excitement as best as she can manage, Kyouko looks up at me with hopeful eyes. I grip her chin and gently kiss her forehead.

"I'll do anything if it makes this one smile. Yashiro-san will have to work to arrange it, though it shouldn't be difficult to convince him." For a moment she looks worried. "It's no trouble, he loves doing this kind of thing for us. I'll buy him something too, as a thank you, if it pleases you."

"I should pitch in, since he'd be helping me too." She knows that I won't take her money, but she tries the puppy dog eyes anyway.

"Eat and go to bed." I command, leaning in to whisper in her ear. "Listen to your sempai, Kyouko, or I might have to punish you."  
"Go-good night, Tsuruga-sempai." She stutters, bowing low.

"Goodnight princess." I smirk, petting her bowed head. "I love you."

"Uh!" Her back goes ramrod straight, and she turns shocked eyes to Okami-san. "I…" The older woman blushes as well and leaves the room. "I love you too, Ren." Kyouko manages to breathe, once the woman is out of sight.

I reach into my pocket and retrieve the slip of paper I stole from the show. "So, you don't forget that your fans adore you. Goodnight Bo-chan." She accepts the paper gingerly, and blushes while reading what one of our fans said about her. I leave finally, heading to the car, where I know Yashiro-san is waiting to have a fangirl outburst.


	19. Chapter 19

My eyes bulge at the sight before me. It looks so hard, the length and girth of it almost painful. What have I gotten myself into?

"Fujita-san?" I squeak, my breath catching in my throat and my chest squeezing tightly. Every fiber of my being screams at me to flee, I have to escape this perverted woman's office before she does something to me. Standing up, I mean to make my exit as politely as possible, but she shoves me back in the chair.

"For heaven's sake child, it's just a picture." A picture of a p-p-penis! I want to scream at her but my mouth won't open. "Here, I have more." I don't want to see more! "It's paper, Kyouko-chan. It can't impregnate you. But his can," she points to the magazine on her desk. Ren and I stare up at me in our flimsy swimsuits, oozing sexuality. Is that really me? "Make him use a condom, when the time comes, and you should be on birth control. I find it hard to imagine the time not coming sooner rather than later."

Why does everything this woman says make my face red hot? She places more pictures on her desk, and with her hands on my head, she forces me to look down at them. My eyes burn with the need to close, but I can't seem to control them. My heart is hammering painfully against my chest, and I'll never be able to look at Tsuruga-san again, or any other man for that matter. Fujita-san pulls two pictures from the pile. Diagrams of the inside of male and female reproductive systems.

"I find sexual education in schools to be lacking." She says, pointing to the diagram of a spread open female organ. It is a body part, nothing more. "Specifically, when it comes to teaching young girls about their own bodies." I will never be able to look at another woman again. I may not be able to look at myself in the mirror anymore.

We spend an entire hour discussing everything from labial folds to fallopian tubes and their functions. It is all, thankfully, very clinical. Fujita-san does not make any of her suggestive jokes about Ren as she explains to me what a hymen is and how it doesn't "pop" or break, but stretches and can tear.

"Since you're athletic you might not have too much bleeding your first time. Still, there is the discomfort to worry about. You look like you're rather small and," she gestures to Ren for the first time in the hour. "Well you see him in that speedo. It would probably be best if you practiced."

"Practice?" I never thought I'd see Fujita-san blush.

"To get your body used to the intrusion." She stammers over her words a bit. "It might even be a good idea to have him… with his fingers a few times before you two go all the way." It's my turn to blush as what she is suggesting sets in my brain.

"No! Absolutely not! No way! Uh uh, no! Not doing that." I shake my head wildly, throwing all the pictures to the floor. "I appreciate you teaching me anatomy but that isn't what I came here for. What I want is a way to stop having ero… those dreams, so that I can have a nice, healthy relationship with my boyfriend. I don't want to have se…se... Never doing it. Never!"

Fujita-san blocks the door to my freedom and points to the chair I recently vacated. I sulk as I reseat myself, bending down to neatly stack her dirty pictures and return them to her desk. Just because they are disgusting, isn't a reason for me to leave a mess on her floor.

"Kyouko-chan, there are some relationships where sex is not a factor. Some people don't feel the desire for sexual contact." She explains in her clinical voice again. "Kyouko, are you someone who lacks the desire to be touched?" I am forced to shake my no head in honesty. There is the desire in me to be touched by Ren. "There is no shame in admitting that you want your boyfriend to touch you."

"I know." With my head bowed, I pray she doesn't make me say it outright.

"Then a nice and healthy relationship for the two of you will eventually lead to…?"

"Ss…s-sex?" She nods as she selects a few pictures and places them in a folder.

"A young woman ought to know about her own body, Kyouko-chan, and eventually you'll have to tell Tsuruga-san about your fantasies. I don't think he'll react as negatively as you seem to believe. I've seen the way he looks at you; he's probably dying to show you the pleasure he could give you. Not that it has to happen yet, but you should be thinking about and planning for the possibility." She places the folder in my numb hands. "You have to get to work soon. Take these to study."

"Oh, okay." I stand back up and bow to her.

"Don't hesitate to call me if you have any questions." Fujita-san pats my head. Why does everyone do that? I'm not a puppy. "And tell your friend Kotonami-san that educating yourself about sex before having it is the smart thing to do. I'm not some deviant, suggesting you go down on him right this second."

"Yes, Fujita-san." I bow to her again before leaving, too embarrassed to ask what she means by that. I'm sure it's something dirty.

I don't know if I could look at Kanae after seeing pictures of cervixes, all sorts of glands, and ruptured hymens. The diagram actually said ruptured on it. I shudder, thinking about how painful that must be.

Once I'm back at LME and in the Love Me room, I realize that I am still holding the pictures. What if someone had seen me carrying these? I gasp, shoving the plain manila folder into my locker and slamming it shut. What the hell was I thinking asking Fujita-san for advice?

"Morning!" Chiori pops up behind me, eliciting a scream. "Calm down, it's just me."

"Oh! Good morning Chiori-chan." I greet her politely, bowing and looking anywhere other than at her.

"Why'd you close your locker, aren't you going to put on the cursed uniform?" I shake my head, pressing my back against it in an effort to conceal the filthy contents.

"Yashiro-san is picking Kanae and me up from here, we're filming Sacred Lotus today," I explain, avoiding her inquisitive eyes.

"Kanae? She was just here complaining about liars and how stupid women obsess over their boyfriends too much." Chiori gives me a pointed look. "Did you two have a fight?" My head smacks into the locker and Chiori giggles. "Did you do something naughty with Tsuruga-san?"

"No." It's obvious that she doesn't believe me. "I didn't, and even if I did, it would be between us. No one else has a say in what we do together." But everyone, including Yashiro-san has had something to say about it.

Yashiro-san has spent the past week tormenting us with innuendo and inappropriate assumptions about how we must spend our free time together. Even his smile is suggestive of his inane fangirl musings, when he so much as sees us standing next to each other. Then there's his squealing, his oohing and awing at the mere perception of affection.

On the other hand, my best friend has been quiet. I do my best to not bring up Ren in our conversations, but my manager hasn't taken the hint. He babbles on and on about the two of us like an oyabaka spouting praise. Kanae rolls her eyes and says nothing about the subject.

"Then why are you so afraid of Kanae? Tell her that what you do with your boyfriend and how obsessed with him you are, is your business." Chiori suggests, and I almost wish that I could. "She's just jealous anyway, and overprotective." Just as she says this Kanae walks into the room.

"I am not jealous of that overhyped actor." She asserts, ripping her uniform off and stuffing it in her locker. "Is your manager here yet? We'll be late if we don't leave soon."

"He's on his way. Don't worry, he'd never let us be late." I try to assure her but she glares at me.

"Right, I'm sure he prioritizes us over his prized peacock, Tsuruga Ren." I don't like the way she says his name, or how she implies that Yashiro-san would overlook me in favor of Ren. I am his charge and he has a manager's pride - he'd do everything in his power to ensure his talents are where they are meant to be on time.

"If you don't want to ride with us you don't have to." The words slip out before I know what I'm saying.

"You know what? You're right, Mogami-san. I can manage on my own, unlike you, who relies on the favor of a top star to boost your career." Kanae walks out the door ignoring my frantic apologies.

"You okay?" Chiori taps my shoulder.

"What?" What just happened? What did she mean by relying on favor from a top star? She can't honestly be accusing me of using Ren like that, can she? What should I do about this? Chiori pulls me into a hug but I barely feel her arms around me. I want Kanae to hug me. I didn't mean to pick a fight with her. Moko-san! I turn my tears inward. There is no time to cry about this, and she'll be even angrier if I'm not at work on time.

"She's just jealous. We should have another sleep over, maybe at a certain apartment where you have a newly decorated room." She's been trying to see that room ever since Yashiro-san mentioned it to her and Kanae, that man gossips too much. I should have known better than to complain to him about Ren's spending.

"I don't think Tsuruga-san would want a bunch of girls in his apartment." I tell her, before a knock on the door announces Yashiro-san. "I don't even stay there most nights."

"Kyouko-chan!" The overly cheerful voice floats into the room. He sings my name all the time now; it's a little creepy. "Kyouko-chan, it's time to go. Oh, hello Chiori-chan. Where is Kotonami-san?"

I put my acting skills to work as I fake a happy smile. "She said she would meet us there, but if we hurry, she might still be close by." She isn't.

We look for her until Yashiro-san warns that we'll be late if we delay any further. I feel bad and worry the entire drive to set, that she might head back to the Love Me room ready for me to apologize. By the time we arrive, I've completely worked myself into a panic, coming up with scenarios in my mind where she was kidnapped on her way back to the room or she had no way here and resorted to walking. It was all for nothing, because she's sitting by herself reading her script when I walk onto set. I want to go over to her and clear the air immediately, but she fixes me with a lethal glare when I get too close.

For the rest of the day I am ignored, and even Yashiro-san's smile wavers, picking up on the tension between us. I walk over to him after getting ready to go home for the day. His gloved hands fiddle with his phone for a moment before he turns to me with a concerned smile.

"Kotonami-san went home?" I nod. Koga-san had come to me to explain that Kanae asked him and his manager for a ride. Her anger is so deep that she turned to a man she doesn't particularly like for a ride home. "Can I do anything to help?" Yashiro-san asks. I sulk in the backseat a he drives.

I lift my eyes to his and shake my head negatively. This is something only I can fix; I need to call Kanae and beg for forgiveness. We arrive at our destination and wait for Ren to come out. I should call her now and tell her that I didn't mean what I said.

"Hi." Ren kisses my cheek when he climbs into the car. "What's wrong?"

"Tsuruga-san it's terrible! Kanae-chan was so mean to our poor little Kyouko! She ignored her and made faces at her; I feel so bad. It must have been something I said about you two. She's jealous and it's all because of my big mouth!" It must have been difficult for Yashiro-san to hold that in all day. Ren looks at me and I don't know what to say. Luckily, our manager only stopped to catch his breath. "It's your fault too. Buying her all sorts of expensive gifts that any girl would love. Being unnaturally good-looking and talented. Then, there's you, Kyouko-chan, you're just too adorable…" I lean back and drown him out as he continues his tirade of praise. "Oh, such beautiful children you'll have."

"Goodnight Yukihito." Ren and I exit the car, but I can still hear Yashiro-san describing a wedding.

"Is it okay for us to leave him like that?" I worry that he might stay up all night talking to himself.

"He's fine. He'll get to the honeymoon and be too embarrassed to continue." I blush, suddenly recalling the pictures in my locker. "You're fighting with Kotonami-san?" He asks, handing me the keycard to unlock the door. My eyebrows knit together, but I listen to him intently as he whispers the code into my ear. With the door open I try to hand the card back. "Hold on to it for me."

We go in and I make a beeline for the kitchen, not wanting to talk about my trouble with Kanae. I don't even fully understand it; so I know explaining it to him won't be very fun. I pocket the card as I begin supper.

"Will you get me a bowl and start setting the table?" I ask him before he can bring up the fight. He does as I ask, but comes back too quickly and lifts me into his arms so I won't be able to escape his questions.

A knock on the door interrupts whatever he's about to ask though, and he sets me down with a curious look on his face. I wonder who it could be at this hour, did Yashiro-san snap out of his rant and come up to scold us for leaving him? The door man is normally very strict, he wouldn't allow just anyone in.

"Princess! It's for you." Ren calls to me.

"Mo, you would call her that." Kanae's voice makes my heart skip.

"Moko-san!" I react automatically, rushing forward to hug her. Remembering that she's mad at me, I skid to a halt and bow my head. "I'm sorry."

Ren's hand smooths my hair back and he kisses my forehead. "You two should go talk in the living room. I'll go make some coffee for myself, tea for you Kyouko, and Kotonami-san?"

"Tea is fine." Kanae replies.

We sit on the couch, neither of us saying a word. Ren sets our tea down and excuses himself with another kiss to my head. Kanae watches us interact, an almost wistful look in her eyes.

"I'm sorry." After some time of the two of us sitting in silence, Kanae speaks up, giving me a start. She holds up a hand to keep me silent. "I'll admit it, I'm jealous of Tsuruga-san, and a little of Fujita-san too. I insult him a lot, and I think I've been unfair to you about your fantasies."

"Shhh!" I panic, glancing in the direction of the kitchen, where Ren is probably messing with my food. "He doesn't know about those." I turn back to her, bowing my head sheepishly. "He knows about Bo though, and I don't want to be rude but I can't trust him alone in the kitchen."

"Oh? Of course," she shakes her head, following me into the kitchen. "I am a little jealous of you, too. I can't say that anyone's ever looked at me the way Tsuruga-san looks at you. I'm not used to feeling this way; so I lashed out. I'm sorry for saying what I did about you using Tsuruga-san."

Kanae helps me finish cooking, and she is surprised to find that Ren set an extra plate at the table for her. We eat in comfortable silence, and then he invites her to stay the night.

"No, I shouldn't." She becomes flustered when he insists.

"He's a gentleman, he won't let you go home this late. Come on, you can borrow something from the magical closet." I swear, every time I come over there's something new in there. Pants, a pair of shoes, and one time I discovered an R'Mandy dress in there and demanded that he return it. Since he said it was a gift from the company, I am now resolved to find someplace to wear it to. Even though I'm sure that was a lie.

Kanae picks out a night dress to wear, and we climb into my massive bed.

"Kyouko, you're my best friend. You're the first friend I've ever had, and when you started dating him, I felt like I was going to lose you. Every time you brought him up only seemed to confirm that fear. Then, I couldn't help you with your problem and you kept ignoring my advice about Bo, and you asked Fujita-san for help. I've been afraid and angry, please forgive me." She looks as if she's about to cry, and I can tell the tears welling up in her eyes are real; not her on-cue acting tears. My arms move on their own to wrap her in a hug, and we stay up for a while, talking about my fantasies and Fujita-san's weird lesson.

Eventually, she falls asleep, but I can't seem to keep my eyes shut. They drift open to stare at her and I giggle at the sight of my best friend sleeping beside me.

"Tsuruga-san?" Unable to sleep, I tiptoe down the hall to his bedroom and knock softly on the door. It creaks open slightly, and I see Ren buttoning his pajama top. "Sorry," I lower my head, but my eyes stay glued to the uncovered half of his chest.

"What's a little girl like you thinking, visiting the beast's den this late at night?" He winks at me playfully.

"I can't sleep." I say, taking a cautious step into the room. "Moko-san looks so adorable and I'm too happy to fall asleep." A soft chuckle escapes him, and I feel my face grow hot. The way I speak about her must give people the wrong idea.

"I can help with that." He says it so casually that I wonder how I'm supposed to take it. Is he being perverted or sweet? The director's pictures cloud my imagination and I blush. "Do you want me to tell you a story?"

I cock my head to the side, not expecting the question, "I guess." At the very least it'd be nice to have the distraction.

"Alright," he pulls back the covers on his bed and lies down beckoning me to join him. "Come here." My heart races as I snuggle into his arms, and he pulls the blankets over us. "Do you want a true story or a fairytale?"

 _Relax. Relax._ I tell myself, focusing on his hands folded together on my stomach. "Both." I whisper, wanting to challenge him a little.

He doesn't hesitate. "I'll tell you my favorite story about an ordinary little girl who grew up to be the most beautiful princess." His voice paints a picture of a little girl who was nothing much to look at. "She was small, and poor with no home to call her own. A crybaby, who often wandered into the forest to daydream about fairies." This girl sounds too familiar. "Once, when she entered the clearing where she normally went to cry, she met a boy who revealed himself to be the prince of fairies." I thought so.

"Ren, is her name Kyouko? Because if it is, I already know this story." I roll over to look down at him. Telling me my own story won't help put me to sleep, especially when I think of how stupid I used to be.

"Hush, or I won't tell you the rest." I close my mouth, resting my head back on his chest as my fingers idly toy with the smooth, silver buttons on his shirt. "Little Kyouko," I roll my eyes, "met with the prince daily to tell him about her troubles and cry on his shoulder."

I can see every moment so clearly, the sun shining brightly over the little stream we played in, and I can almost feel the little fish swimming over our feet. One time, to cheer me up, Corn taught me how to dance like the royal fairies do. I stumbled a lot, but he was patient with me until eventually, we were dancing around the little clearing, and I pretended we were attending a fairy ball. He told me stories too, about the fairy kingdom and all the rules that he hated having to follow.

The alarm wakes me up around four. I groggily roll over to the side of the bed and reach out for the clock on the nightstand. The tips of my fingers barely reach it and I inwardly groan not wanting to move any further from the warmth of the covers to be able to reach it. Curse my short limbs. There is a moan above me then a long arm snakes over mine, easily finding and reaching the alarm clock to shut it off. Ren settles himself over me, his weight a warm comfort that threatens to lull me back to sleep; back to my memories of Corn.

"Ren?" Still groggy, I roll over to look up at him. How did he know Corn taught me how to dance? The question is on the tip of my tongue, but what comes out instead is, "What happened to your shirt?"

The emperor winks at me. "You seem to like stripping me. I believe you said something about it being sinful for me to cover up my _perfect body_."

"I did not." I shove him off me, sitting up to search for his missing article of clothing. I did say that as my fingers unbuttoned his shirt. It hadn't been a conscious thing; I can only remember wanting to feel his skin. "Mm…" I hide my head in my hands to mourn the innocent maiden I used to be.

"I need to get going, but you still have two hours before you need to get ready for school, go back to sleep." He kisses my cheek before getting out of bed. I check the clock and think for a moment.

"You're not getting out of breakfast." I say, climbing out of bed and head to the kitchen. I jump, startled by the woman leaning against the counter. "Moko-san, what are you doing in here?"

"You're sleeping with him!"

 **Extra chapter**

 **Hikaru** : **Advice for my rival?**

Is it really because I'm short, or is there something about him I can't see? Sure, he's a top celebrity, and he's probably filthy rich, and he's so handsome it should be a sin. Kyouko-chan isn't the kind of girl who would fall for those things though, at least, I thought she wasn't.

Why does he have to be so tall? And good looking. And famous. So famous that he can't be bothered to appear on a variety show with a chicken mascot, even though I'm sure he knows his girlfriend happens to be the chicken.

Our producer wants him on the show, and I've been chosen to be the one who asks him. Shinichi and Yuusei just want me to confront him about Kyouko. They claim that there's no way Mr. co-star killer is serious about an innocent girl like her. I can understand how he'd be enthralled by her cuteness, but I have to agree with them that someone like him will get bored quickly and break her heart.

I'm staring too hard at him, and he notices. A creepily bright smile takes over his face, and he waves to me. I walk over to him, determined to be a man and stand up for Kyouko. At the very least, I have to ask him if he'd appear on Yappa Kimagure Rock. He'll most likely refuse, and then I can tell Kyouko that her boyfriend isn't the nice guy she probably thinks.

"Hikaru-san, how are you?" I can see through his polite gentleman act. It's obvious he noticed my crush on Kyouko the other day, and no man is that happy to see another guy close to his girlfriend.

I have trouble concealing my disdain for him as I answer, "I'm well thank you." I don't ask him how he's doing. I prepare myself to ask him how long he plans to string Kyouko along, and then I notice his food. Somehow, I didn't peg him for someone who liked vegetables so much, he has a double order.

"Kyouko insists that I eat a lot of vegetables; she thinks that because of my height, I should eat more of everything, actually." Most men might sound like they were complaining saying those words, but he sounds almost elated.

"Are you having dinner with Kyouko-chan?" I don't want to know the answer. Dinner this late would most likely take place in his apartment, and then who knows what he might make her do.

"Yes, I get to feed her tonight. She shouldn't always have to cook after work." He takes the paper bag after it's packed, and turns to me. There is a nervous glint that does not fit with the image I had of the most desired man in Japan. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure." It reminds me of Kyouko, the way his cheeks gain a slight pink tint as he looks away. What could make him behave like a teenager?

"Have you ever had a girlfriend?" The nerve of this man. I'm even being nice to him, but all he wants to do is rub it in that he got the girl. Joke's on you buddy, because when you're dumb enough to lose her, I'll be there. I'll always be there for her. Maybe that means the joke is on me though, because she clearly likes them tall, which means she'll never be mine.

"Yes, a few." Three. I have had exactly three girlfriends, and I can remember each of their names and faces. They were all special to me, which is probably more than this playboy could say. He's likely had too many women to count. Why can't he go to one of them, and leave Kyouko alone? She deserves better than being another blurred out face in his memory.

"Can you tell me what you did with them?" Large innocent eyes stare down at me, and I have no defense for this attack.

"You know, the usual." What does this guy want from me? If he isn't bragging about Kyouko, then why is he talking to me?

"The usual?" His head cocks to the side, reminding me of Kyouko even more. I stifle a laugh, wondering if he picked it up from her or if she copies his behavior.

"Holding hands, kissing, you know." I explain, hoping he's not trying to gauge how much experience I've had. "I'm sure you've had more practice with woman than I have." I really want this conversation to end, but I don't know how to politely get out of it. Wasn't I going to confront him about Kyouko? I'm such a coward.

"Well I…" he scratches the back of his head. "I mean, I've been with women. I've had plenty of practice but it…"

"You weren't serious about them?" He shakes his head, and my blood boils. That's just what I thought. Everyone else is convinced of his gentlemanly act, but I knew he had to be a playboy... even if I only came to that conclusion after I found out about him and Kyouko.

"They were pretty and they liked me, so I convinced myself that I liked them," he offers, shrugging.

Him saying it like that makes me feel bad for him, he looks so lonely.

"Kyouko-chan is different though, isn't she?" His blush deepens, and I feel the need to block his face from view. This would be bad for his image if anyone saw, and I don't really want to see it either. I don't want to like him.

"Kyouko's perfect. She deserves to be happy, and I want to be part of the reason for her happiness." Dammit, why does he have to make me feel sympathetic? "Sorry for bothering you with this, you can forget I asked." We've been walking towards the parking garage this whole time, and I hadn't even realized it. His eyes look up and become so soft and affectionate that I almost swoon. I follow his gaze to find Kyouko standing by a car and looking ready to bolt.

"Hey, wait a second." I say to keep him from sprinting over to her, which he looks like he really wants to do. "Normally, a couple will do anything together they both enjoy. Watching a movie, playing cards or a board game; talking about your day is a good way to spend time alone."

"Thanks." He looks like an eager child, struggling between propriety and running off to play. It's kind of creepy how a grown man can make himself look so young.

"No problem, I have a favor to ask of you in return." He agrees to be on the show and with another thank you while bowing, he runs over to her. I watch the two of them and wonder if it's just dumb luck that there are no photos of them together floating around everywhere. They are so painfully obvious, and I don't envy Yashiro-san his job.

 **A/N: I apologize for this chapter it isn't my favorite, but I started that thing with Kanae so I had to finish it. I tacked on the Hikaru chapter just because.**

 **Thank you everyone for the reviews, and I promise to make the next chapter better with lots of fluff and a little drama because Kyouko is getting a visitor soon. I can't say who or when but someone is coming to see her and I can't promise they'll be nice. I have personal issues with that character and I'm gonna use this fic to deal with them a bit.**

 **As for making Ren suffer, I assure you that he is in his own way. He torments himself with wanting her to know things but not knowing how to tell her. It just isn't as obvious because Kyouko gets more chapters than he does. He tried to tell her in this chapter with his story but he couldn't bring himself to say it. That's sort of why he needs more male friends like Hikaru who can teach him to be more honest.**

 **Sorry again for this chapter.**


	20. I Don't Mind

"Moko-san!" Kyouko cries out as a fist collides with my left eye. Then, I hear Kotonami-san give a pained cry. I clutch my eye, more out of surprise than pain.

"MO! What is your face made of?" Her accusing eyes glare at me as I hand her an ice pack from the freezer. "Don't pretend your eye doesn't hurt."

Kyouko takes the pack and holds it to the angry woman's hand. She tends to both of our wounds and then proceeds to cook an extra-large breakfast. I don't ask why I'm being punished, I just eat my food like a good boy and earn a bright smile from my girlfriend. Kotonami-san complains, however, worried that she's going to get fat.

"I'll take care of the dishes." I stop Kyouko before she can clear the table. "Go get ready for work."

"Right, like you know how to wash dishes." Kotonami-san sneers.

"Moko-san, don't be rude." Kyouko clings to her arm, dragging her away. At least when her friend is around she doesn't protest against me helping with the chores.

When they come back out, ready to leave, I kiss Kyouko on the forehead, ignoring the sound of disgust from behind her. I drop her off at school first; then sit in silence with Kotonami-san on our way to LME. She glares at me for the majority of the ride, until we hit the red light right outside the building.

"I hope you know I'm not going away," she grinds out, turning in her seat to level me with a stern glare.

"Why would I want you to go away?" My question startles her, and she scrambles to think of a reason.

"Because then you can have Kyouko all to yourself, and it would be easier to control her without me around to point out your bullshit." For a moment I look at her, annoyed.

"I'm not _him._ I don't want to control her." The light changes, prompting me to turn away from her and back to the road. I park in the garage and stay sitting, waiting for her to say more, but she just crosses her arms and glares. "I don't mind you hanging around my place with her. I don't care if you hate me and point out my bullshit to her. You make her happy and I think that we can both agree she deserves to be happy. No matter how jealous of one another we may be, she shouldn't have to suffer for our egos."

"Fine." Is the only reply I get, before she throws open the door and stomps away. I shake my head, a quiet chuckle escaping as I head up to meet with Yashiro-san.

All morning long, he stares at me with that dopey look of his. Every now and then he giggles, failing to turn it into a cough. I groan inwardly, holding an ice pack to my eye. I'm lucky she didn't aim for my nose. She might have broken it if she had the chance, and that would be bad for work; not to mention that my _caring_ manager would never let me live it down.

"You never told me what she caught you doing to poor Kyouko-chan, it must've been really dirty to earn that bruise," he snickers, retrieving a new ice pack from the little cooler Kyouko packed for me. She's the only one on my side. There isn't even a bruise, the area around my eye is just a little red. Of course, that could lead to some inconvenient questions, or spark some kind of strange rumor if I'm not careful. Tabloids always come up with the weirdest stories.

"Shouldn't you be heading out to pick up Kyouko from school?" I remind him, glancing at the clock on the wall. He pouts, but resumes his professional demeanor.

"Yes, I'll go take her to work. We'll be at the Sacred Lotus location for most of the day and you'll have to drive yourself home tonight. Do you remember where you need to be and when you need to be there?" I nod, setting the ice pack on the table. "And you'll remember to eat."

"Yes, sir. You can report back to Kyouko that I will be a good boy, sir." I salute and he quirks his brow.

"Don't act like that outside of this room." He knows me better than to think I would. "And conceal that bruise." I wave him away, eager to be left alone.

With him gone, I check my face in the mirror and smile. Being punched was worth every second of sleeping with Kyouko in my arms. God help me, I'm a hopeless idiot.

The day goes by uneventfully, for the most part. I have a couple of interviews, in which I flirt around questions about Kyouko, and I have a meeting with R'Mandy about the female model for the upcoming fall collection dropping out. We have to start shooting next week for that. It comes as a shock to me that Manabe-san, who usually fills the spot, is pregnant. If I'm not mistaken, she's Kyouko's age. Normally I try not to judge, but I can't help feeling a little disappointed in her and her boyfriend. A high school girl shouldn't be putting her life on hold to have a baby. Perhaps my real issue with it is that he happens to be her mentor, but it isn't any of my business. I should tell Yukihito though, that most of her contracts will be up for grabs. Kyouko and Kotonami-san could snag those jobs before anyone else even hears about them.

At the end of the day, a gratingly familiar voice calls out to me when I'm walking to my car. "Tsuruga!" I release a heavy sigh and turn in the direction of the voice.

"Fuwa, to what do I owe the pleasure of being accosted by you at this hour?" He sneers and throws a magazine at me.

"Just because you look like _that_ doesn't give you the right to impregnate a seventeen-year-old high school girl!" What is this fool talking about? Does he think I had something to do with Manabe-san?

"Go home Fuwa, it's late and I have work in the morning." Another magazine flies at my head but I catch it before it hits me. Looking down I can see the misleading headline, _Someone close to Tsuruga Ren is pregnant!_ Fuwa probably saw that and assumed things without reading the article beneath it that clearly states Manabe-san is expecting her first child with her boyfriend-photographer, Himuro-san. My name is only on there to grab people's attention and for the potential scandal, when people like Fuwa misread it.

"First you steal her from me, and then you knock her up. What kind of sick fuck are you, that you can get worked up over a plain girl with a little, boy body, like Kyouko?" My fists clench, wanting to punch him for insulting her.

"As far as I know, Mogami-san isn't pregnant. Furthermore, she isn't a toy that can be stolen from you." I toss the magazine back to him. "Learn to read Fuwa, _Manabe-san_ is pregnant."

"You're cheating on Kyouko with Manabe-san!" He's like an untrained dog, barking and growling at anything that moves, without listening to commands. I turn from him, intending to get in my car and drive away. "I know Manabe-san is better than Kyouko in every way imaginable, but it isn't right to cheat on her. You chose that ugly boring woman, so you should honor your choice and stick with her. Hey, I'm talking to you!" He catches up, grabbing me before I can get in the car. "If you don't want the ugly bitch, then give her back."

I am not proud of my reaction. It sickens me that I let him get under my skin, and that I lost control of my temper so easily. He's just an insect making a nuisance of himself, and I should shake him off and leave. It occurs to me, however, that we are alone in the parking garage, and I let Kuon slip out. Fuwa grunts as I grip his neck, slamming him into the nearby wall. He struggles against my hand, panic written across his face. The thought that it might upset Kyouko, if I kill him without her permission, causes me to loosen my grip. He gasps for air, still trying to yank my hand away from his throat. I lean in holding his eyes with my glare.

"Are you done talking now?" The musician nods and I let go completely, watching him crumple to the floor. "It has been irritating talking to you, in the future, please refrain from approaching me and Kyouko." I crouch down beside him, poking him in the chest. "And if you ever insult her in my presence again, you better pray she's around to save your sorry ass."

"Then you admit it, she's yours now?" His voice is shaking but he looks determined to force me to answer.

"She's not a toy Fuwa. No one owns her. Do yourself a favor and remember that for your future relationships. People are not property." I stand up, turning away from him as he mutters a curse to himself. "Go home and get some rest, Fuwa. I'll be sure to tell Kyouko all about our little talk, while I'm holding her tonight." I drive away, laughing at his shocked face in the rearview mirror.

Kyouko probably isn't spending the night. I wish she would show up, and use her key to get in, but she probably hasn't even realized that I gave it to her. I need to work on not being such a coward, and tell her things directly, rather than being sneaky about things. There really was no other way I could think of to get her to accept it though. I want to call her before I go to bed, but she'll be filming late into the night. I wouldn't want to interrupt her, and she probably wouldn't be able to answer anyway. With my luck, Yukihito will answer, and he'll tease me about calling. Then, he'll ask if I ate supper yet, and I'd have to honestly tell him no, which he'd report it to Kyouko. I'll be in trouble for sure if she finds out I called her instead of eating a proper meal before bed.

"You are a hopeless fool, Tsuruga Ren." I mutter to myself, bringing the phone to my ear, as I place a bag of popcorn in the microwave. Hopefully Kyouko will focus more on the fact that I ate, and not what I ate.

I sigh when I hear her answering machine, and leave her a brief message about eating, before going to bed. I also mention that she shouldn't hesitate to call me when she finishes, if she needs to. I eat my popcorn while watching an episode of Box R, and check my phone every few minutes, willing her to call me. At the end of the second episode, I've finally managed to finish the whole bag. I get up to toss it in the trash, and am excited to hear the phone ring. I run back to the couch, only to be disappointed to see that it's Yukihito.

"If you're not calling to tell me you have my girlfriend outside, I'm hanging up." I answer.

"That's rude of you, at least greet me first," he complains.

"Goodnight, Yukihito." It's late anyway, and the sooner I go to bed, the sooner I can wake up to see her.

"Alright, I'm sending them up." He says, before the line goes dead.

"Them?" After five minutes, there's a knock on the door.

"Just use your key," I hear through the door.

"I can't just barge in like that, and it's not my key. He asked me to hold onto it, not keep it." They bicker in hushed tones for a moment, before knocking again.

"I'm sure it was."

"No, it wasn't."

"Kanae is right. He wanted you to have it. Because you're his woman, and he wants you to move in," a third vaguely familiar voice speaks up.

"That's not true, he never said anything like that. He'll probably be really agitated that we're here, and want us to leave. I can't believe I let you guys talk me into this." Kyouko sounds so distressed, that I just want to hold her. "I don't want to face the demon lord."

I open the door slowly, but stand in the way, holding it so they can't get in. A fake scowl is plastered on my face, as I look at the three girls standing in the hallway. Kotonami-san glares at me from behind Kyouko, and Amamiya-san beams brightly, waving an energetic hand in my direction. Kyouko holds her head down, peeking up at me through her lashes and wringing her hands.

"Why, didn't you just use your keycard, did you forget the password?" Shocked amber eyes look up at me, a blush coloring her face as she shakes her head. "Then try again." I shut the door on them and wait.

"What the hell!" Kotonami-san screams, as Amamiya-san bursts out laughing. "Kyouko open this door so I can punch that man in the other eye." There's a long pause, and then I hear the card beep, and fingers tapping the buttons. The door opens cautiously, and Kyouko steps in, followed by her friends.

"Welcome home." I gesture for them to come in. Kyouko's friends push past her, kicking their shoes off, and head straight for the couch with bags of snacks.

"I'm sorry." Kyouko bites her lip, eyes downcast. "Chiori-chan insisted that she get to spend the night too. Kanae…" I pull her in for a quick kiss, effectively ending her apologies.

"They can stay here whenever you want. As long as I get to see you, I don't mind." I whisper against her lips, before capturing them again.

"Dear god, he even watches her on TV before bed. We seriously need to get Kyouko's stalker situation under control, I mean she's dating one of her most zealous stalkers." Hearing the loud comment, I laugh, breaking the kiss, and motion for Kyouko to join her friends.

"I'll get you some drinks. Tea okay for everyone?" I hear a reply of two synchronized yes's and one 'I'll help'.

"Just sit down," Kotonami-san hisses, and I hear Kyouko protest meekly, but she doesn't follow me into the kitchen. "Put a movie on."

I hear them shuffle about, before voting on what to watch. Kyouko votes for a Disney film, Amamiya-san finds my small collection of horror, and Kotonami-san checks out the American action films curiously.

"No one wants to watch Snow White or Rapunzel, Kyouko."

"Ren does," Kyouko claims, "If we vote, he'll pick Rapunzel because that's what he likes." What is this girl telling her friends about me?

"Of course, he does. It's what you like, so he'll go along with it, he's such a _gentleman_." The way Kotonami-san says it, it sounds like she believes I'm anything but. "He doesn't count, he probably has to go to bed. We don't have anything scheduled for the morning, but Mr. Number One Actor most likely has a full schedule from morning to night."

"Someday you'll have to teach me how to wrap a guy around my finger too, I mean, it would be cool to have someone who worships me." Amamiya-san snickers, and I walk in just in time to see the redness travel down Kyouko's neck.

I set down their tea and turn to Kyouko, kissing her cheek. "I should get to bed." I say, leaning into her ear and whispering, "come join me if you can't sleep." I back away enough to see how much redder her face has become, and give her an innocent smile. "Goodnight, Kotonami-san, Amamiya-san."

"Night!" Aamamiya-san waves to me, as she sneaks over to the television with a movie in her hand.

"Mm." Kotonami-san waves me away, pretending she isn't bothered by my lack of annoyance about the uninvited guests.

"Goodnight, Kyouko." I tap the corner of my mouth, and she looks at her friends before placing a quick peck on my cheek.

"Goodnight, Ren." I kiss her head before going to my room, satisfied in knowing that she's here, where I know she's safe and happy.

I don't know how long they stay up, but sometime in the night my door creeps open. A figure glides over to me and tentatively perches on the side of my bed.

"Do you want Kotonami-san to hit me again?" Kyouko shakes her head, but stays seated on my bed.

"Chiori-chan kicks in her sleep." She offers as an excuse.

"In that case…" I lift the covers, inviting her into the warmth, and she crawls in, snuggling close to my chest. "You want a story?" I feel her nod against me. There's enough light seeping in through the slightly open door, that I can see her eyes, staring up at me expectantly.

"I want a true story, about you." Her voice is shaky and small.

Guilt grips my chest, and I almost spill all my secrets. If I tell her, she'd hate me for keeping it from her for so long; not to mention, she'll know that I'm a murderer. I don't want to lose her because of what I've done.

"I love you more than anything, that's the truest story there is." I offer, trying to avoid telling her more than I already have. I always end up saying too much, and eventually she'll start piecing the puzzle together, if she hasn't already.

"Ren," she sighs, and I know that I'll have to give her something, if I don't want to hurt her feelings.

"Alright," thinking for a moment, I remember that I do have something I need to tell her. "I was attacked by an insect earlier."

"An insect?" Confusion clouds her eyes.

"Yeah, an annoying fly came buzzing around me while I was heading to my car. He was going on and on about how I stole you from him." Understanding seeps into her honey-colored eyes. "I swatted at him, and I thought about hurting him, but I didn't want you to be upset, so I left him there. I might have choked him a little first, though."

"Ren!" She covers her mouth with her hand and we both pause for a few minutes, watching the door.

"He was talking about you. I don't like it when he insults you, forgive me please?" I nuzzle her neck, hugging her close. "It was nothing, honest. The only reason I'm even telling you, is he might come buzzing around you later, and try to accuse me of hiding it from you. Otherwise, I would've completely forgotten it happened."

"He kind of already told me," she admits. "He left an obnoxious voicemail complaining about you. I almost called him back to yell, but Kanae said that that was what he wanted. Then, she suggested we come here for a sleepover and Chiori-chan kind of overheard."

"Why was Amamiya-san on the Sacred Lotus set?" Her cheeks glow pink in the dark, making me really curious.

"We had to go to the Love Me office to get something." I want to ask what it was, but it might be something personal for one of the girls. "That didn't count as a story you know, I want you to tell me something true about yourself."

Kotonami-san must be getting in her head, she isn't normally this forceful. What can I tell her that won't risk losing her? I take a deep breath, willing my hands not to shake.

"Ren? Are you ever going to introduce me to your family? Or at least tell me about them?" My heart aches at the hurt in her voice. "Did you have siblings, or a childhood friend?"

Any little bit of information would make her happy right now. Even knowing that I'm terrified to speak. How could someone so good still love me after hearing all that I've done? I brush my thumb over her bottom lip. I might die of heartbreak the second I am no longer allowed to touch her like this.

"I did have a friend when I was younger; he died…" it was not my intention to cry but the tears start to fall anyway.

Before I can confess that I was the cause of his death, I turn into a sobbing child in her arms. I feel like a monster, like I've tricked her again somehow. Still, I cling, finding comfort in her warm embrace. When was the last time I allowed myself to cry like this? Did I ever truly mourn Rick? I can't remember ever giving in to the pain. I just always clung to the guilt of what I'd done. I close my eyes, breathing in the scent of her skin, and silently praying that I never lose her.

 **A/N: Sorry it took a bit longer to get this chapter out and it's a little lackluster. I'm in Cosmetology school and I'm stressing over test out at the moment, plus the recent manga chapter had me depressed and angry. I'm seriously pissed at Kyouko atm for not knowing Ren well enough to think he'd like someone like Kimiko. At least mistake his crush for a nice and talented girl not someone who gets by on family connections. Now I'm crying because it frustrates me so much, why the hell would he give that bimbo a ring! It doesn't make sense! I'm mad at Ren too!**

 **Anyways, thanks for all the support and sticking with this story. You guys are awesome and a special thanks to** **unicornforcewinds for being my beta.**


	21. Careless Whisper

**_A/N: Whoops I posted this in the wrong chapter sorry. Thank you Shuzuhoe!_**

 _I killed him._

The words form a lump in my throat and I tremble, staring down at the ringing phone. In the stillness that followed Ren's tearful breakdown, I held him tight, petting his hair and rubbing his back the way he'd done for me before. Every so often a sob would wrack through his body, and he would mumble that his friend was dead. Slowly, his weeping gave way to a light snore, as he drifted out of consciousness. I felt his tears subside as his arms loosen around me, and I heard the quiet admission whispered in my ear that startled me awake.

 _I killed him._

The following morning, he didn't seem to remember what he said. He apologized for crying, but didn't mention the words that he'd spoken after calming down. I managed to put it out of my mind long enough to get through breakfast, and then being dropped off at work. In the three weeks that followed, those words have slowly eaten away at my sanity until I can think of nothing else.

Ren pretends not to notice my changed behavior, and I pretend that his admission of being a murderer doesn't bother me.

I wonder if it's survivor's guilt. Something happened, a car accident or a robbery gone wrong, in which Ren survived but his friend didn't. That must be why he is so overprotective, my sweet, affectionate, gentlemanly boyfriend couldn't be an actual murderer.

 _I killed him._

I jump when the phone rings, and in my mind I can see him, dressed all in black, nearly beating a stranger's brains into the pavement. I remember that night so vividly, that night and each night that followed where he became some other person. That angry, violent person, would have no qualms about hurting someone, but there's a difference between beating up some guy and taking a life, isn't there?

 _I killed…_ "Shut up!" I slam my fists on the table, and the phone falls to the floor.

"What was that about?" Ren asks, entering the small but comfortable room at the R'Mandy headquarters. It's sparsely decorated, with little indication that it does belong to him. There's a mini fridge stocked with bottled water and no food, and a picture of the cast of Dark Moon.

"Nothing." I snatch the phone up, hiding it beneath my leg.

"Nothing made you scream at your phone to shut up?" He quirks his brow at me, holding his hand out for the phone. He doesn't have to see it to know what's going on. "That insect is still buzzing around you, isn't it?"

Sulking, I hand it over. "I don't know how he got my number this time. He just keeps getting it, but I never answer unknown numbers." Hopefully if I apologize quickly he won't scold me too harshly. "I didn't give it to him, honest."

"I know." He smiles warmly, giving my stomach that soft, fuzzy feeling that causes me to melt.

If I could love him less, his possible murderer status might be easier for me to deal with. I don't know if I could date someone who killed another person, but Ren must have had a reason. The man I fell in love with wouldn't hurt anyone without cause, so it _had_ to be an accident. Right?

"Yes, hello Fuwa." The darkness in his voice evokes a tiny squeak from my throat. I shiver from fear, but there's an odd twinge of excitement. "She doesn't want to speak to you." There's a pause as he listens, surprisingly calm, to whatever Shoutaro is screaming about. He appears outwardly unfazed, but I can sense the darkness lurking beneath his gentlemanly façade. "I understand that you are filled with regret now that you realize what you've lost, but you need to understand and accept that you have lost. Your relationship, whatever it may have been, is in the past. She doesn't want to speak to you, and I will not stand by and allow you to keep harassing her. As her _friend_ , I am giving you one final warning Fuwa." A chill of ice runs through my veins as he speaks the final words, "Stop calling."

 _I killed him._ The man before me is a murderer. There's an overwhelming sensation in my legs, giving me the urge to run. He sets the phone down in front of me and I flinch, looking up only to be met with a pleasant smile. I stare openly at him, willing the secrets to spill from his mouth.

"Was it wrong of me to do that? I would've asked first, but you'd have told me not to." I can't help but chuckle at the childish grin on his face. How can this man be dangerous and sexy and innocent and good all at once?

"It's fine," I whisper, not sure if I am fine with it, or if I just want to be.

"Why are you crying then?" A gentle hand cups my face, and he leans over me, engulfing me in his presence, as he kisses both my cheeks. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have called him without your permission."

"It's fine." I say again, trying to sound more convincing.

Ren leans over me. "Kyouko," he presses his nose to mine. "I'm sorry, Kyouko."

I order myself not to give in to that puppy dog face; not to fall in love with those sweet, brown eyes pleading for forgiveness. Even with my eyes closed I cannot shut him out, he's invaded my heart completely.

"Sometimes I can't figure out which one of us is the adult," I grumble, sliding my hands up his arms to rest behind his neck.

"You, obviously." He kisses my nose before taking a seat beside me. "Come here." He opens his arms for me, but I hesitate. If he really is a murderer, is it still okay for me to love him? "Kyouko?" There he goes again, cocking his head to the side with damned puppy dog look on his face.

I sit in his lap and snuggle close to his chest. "Do all models get their own private room? I suppose you're just special, being a top star." Somehow, when his arms wrap around me, all my worries fade away. My body floods with a feeling of safety, and I know that even his other self would never hurt me.

"It has nothing to do with fame," he smiles boastfully. "It's the perks of having the best manager in the business." He chuckles at the face I make at the mentions _that_ man. "He was only doing his job Kyouko."

"Right," I sulk, remembering this morning when Yashiro-san woke me up at four, calling to announce that he and Ren were downstairs. In truth, I'd known that he had a shoot in the morning, but our manager neglected to mention that _I_ had a meeting at the same time. I also didn't know that I would have to wear expensive clothes brought over by that manager, clothes that were a gift from R'Mandy's Art Director, who requested a meeting with me from her good friend Yashiro-san. I'd honestly rather wear the stupid expensive clothes Ren bought for me than this overpriced R'Mandy suit.

"He was getting you a job, that's his job." I purse my lips, refusing to listen to him about that traitor.

"Yeah, a job wearing nothing but the jacket of this suit. What was the point of giving me the whole suit when they only wanted to photograph me in the jacket?" Ren laughs, placing his hands over mine, as they pull at the knee length skirt.

"It was a gift from Yumi-san. She was impressed by your work, and when she learned that Yashiro is your manager, she demanded to meet you." That art director, Yumi-san, had a hard time keeping her hands to herself. It's like she never heard of personal space. "I am proud of you, though." The words send a jolt through me. How many times had I wished that I could make my mother proud? "I hated all those people looking at you, but you didn't freak out or cause a scene. You captured the attention of a highly influential person in the modeling industry, and posed beautifully. You know the photographer was ready to refuse you? He usually only works on projects if Manabe-san is involved, but you changed his mind."

"Manabe-san?" I've heard of her. She's gorgeous, and said to have the most perfect figure in the industry. "She used to go to my school, but she's been absent lately. Come to think of it, is Himuro-san a teacher? I seem to recall seeing him there. He was surrounded by the girls from photography club so I couldn't be sure."

"You don't know? Himuro-san, has been teaching there for a long time now. He'd given up on models, and would only photograph landscapes, until Manabe-san came along." He pauses to flick the hair out of my eyes, and there's a wicked glint in his eyes, like he's itching to tease me about something. "Haven't you heard the rumors?"

I cross my arms, appalled by this. "I don't listen to shameless gossip and you shouldn't either."

"Oh, it was more than gossip. As it turns out, Manabe-san and Himuro-sensei have been secretly dating." How the hell would he know that? "You see, Manabe-san was meant to do the upcoming photoshoots for the new fall line with me and Himuro, but she had to drop out suddenly. You really should pay more attention to gossip, it's part of the job to know what rumors are floating around. How else will you be prepared to deny things?"

"I thought preparing me for interviews was Yashiro-san's job?" I do read some articles, but mostly just the ones about him or Kanae. Occasionally, I glimpse over the ones about me but not about other people. Most of it is made up or worded in such a way that it sounds scandalous. Watching interviews seems to be the best way to get the truth about people. "Why did she have to drop out?"

He bites his lip, staring into my eyes like a child eager to see my reaction. "She's pregnant."

"How!" I blurt out and my shock must be exactly what he'd been hoping for.

He grins wolfishly, "Would you like me to show you?" The emperor pins me down faster than I can blink, looming over me and nipping at my lips.

I squeak in surprise. "That's not what I meant, Ren! I know how," I pause, looking away from him, "babies are made…Ren!" His name turns into a moan on my lips as his tongue caresses the shell of my ear. Kisses burn a trail up and down my neck, causing me to breath hard.

"Do you?" He chuckles, poking my nose as he begins to pull away. "You're fun to tease."

Intoxicated by the emperor's presence, my hands grip his hair and pull him back down to me. If I was thinking straight, I'd be embarrassed by my actions. If my mind didn't have the tendency to become muddled around him, I might have thought of all the reasons that it was a bad idea, like his potentially murderous past. But when he looks at me like, that my body comes to life and begs me to offer myself up to him, to do with as he pleases.

Ren seizes my hands before they can wander beneath his shirt, and pins them to the couch.

"If you don't stop with the sexual harassment, I'll do naughty things to you. Then you'll learn exactly how babies are made." Still unable to find my senses, I raise my lips to his, earning a groan.

"I like it." I breathe against his lips. He growls and grips my wrists so tight it's almost painful. "I like when you do naughty things to me."

Where did those words come from? I should be mortified at my own lewdness, but my mind has no room to think of anything other than his touch.

With a long, slow groan, Ren sits up and covers his mouth with his hand. I stare at him in awe, his face glowing red as he tries to hide a large smile beneath his hand.

"Oh Kyouko." He runs his hand up his face, into his hair. "Be careful what you say to me, or you really might end up like Manabe-san." I swallow hard, trying to block out the fantasies his words bring to mind. Kanae was right, I have been hanging out with Fujita-san too much. He lightly touches my cheek, no longer hiding the heavenly smile that I don't think I'll ever get used to. "Did you have fun today?"

"Yes, despite my lack of clothes." It had been fun and a little nerve-racking, to be sought out by such a big company.

"Good." His lips press to my cheek and the two of us are startled by the shutter sound of a camera.

For a moment I can't breathe, afraid that we've been caught. Ren jumps away from me immediately, while I stay plastered to the couch, staring wide-eyed at the spot he just vacated.

"Dammit, you moved too fast," our manager growls out as he examines his phone. "Do it again. That tender moment was perfect for the collage I'm working on."

"Yukihito," Ren sighs, reaching out and plucking Yashiro-san's phone from his hands. "You know how dangerous pictures are for us, please stop taking them. What if you lost your phone or sent the picture to someone by accident?"

"Ren," suddenly serious, Yashiro-san levels Ren with an authoritative glare. "I am a professional. I will not have one of my charges accusing me of being such an amateur that I'd lose my phone or accidentally send anything."

Ren lowers his head like a scolded child. "I didn't mean it like that."

"We have to go now. Sawara-san just called to inform me that an offer for Kyouko was submitted to him. You," he instructed, waving at Ren dismissively, "have that very important thing to do. Make sure you're not late for this evening."

"What does he have this evening?" I wonder out loud.

"Dinner with very important people," Yashiro-san answers briskly. "Let's go."

Yashiro-san leads us out like children and locks the door behind him. I hate that the more it seems like they don't want to tell me something, the more I want to know. Why can't I know who he's meeting with?

Ren promises Yashiro-san that he'll be on his best behavior, telling me goodbye with an adorable puppy dog pout on his face, when he's dropped off at his apartment.

"Yashiro-san…?" I start to ask as the car pulls away.

"You'll find out later," he interrupts curtly. He seems to be more nervous than Ren is about the meeting, but I shrug it off and we drive in silence. I wish I could ask him if he knew anything about Ren's past, but I doubt he knows about the possible murder. That isn't something you tell people intentionally.

"Mo, there you are!" The moment we walk through the doors of LME, Kanae stomps over to us eyes filled with annoyance. "Am I the only Love Me member now?" She takes my arm and drags me away before I can say anything. "I've been sorting files and shredding documents for hours. It's so damn tedious!"

"I'll go check with Sawara-san." Yashiro-san calls to me before Kanae and I vanish into the Love Me room.

"Here's your pile. Maybe if you help me, we can finish this. Chiori-chan is hopeless when it comes to sorting things out. She kept shredding the wrong documents and keeping ones that needed to be shredded, so I sent her to change the posters around the building."

"Oh," I'm a little afraid to be alone with Kanae. Part of me wants to tell her everything, but I know it's not my secret to tell, and what would she think of Ren if she knew? They've been getting along lately, at least Chiori says that she thinks they are, and I don't want her to have any more of an excuse to hate him. All I ever see them do is argue, almost as bad as Shoutaro and me, except they fight over me and what we're going to do together.

In the evening, while finishing shredding the stacks of documents, a chill runs down my spine. Kanae's irritated gaze greets me when I look up, and I freeze, wondering what I've done to upset her.

"What the hell is that?" An accusing finger jabs me in the neck. "What the hell did you let that man do?"

"Ow!" I wine as she continues her assault on my poor neck. "Stop."

Chiori enters the room to find me cowering on the floor, with Kanae looming over me menacingly. She clears her throat drawing Kanae's attention.

"What are you two doing? I'm always walking in on you doing weird things." She comments, opening up her locker.

"Look Kyouko, I hope you know that letting Mr. Number One do _that_ to you doesn't mean you're going to graduate from the Love Me curse." Kanae crosses her arms, speaking down to me like she' s scolding a child. "You're not allowed out of Love Me. That won't happen until you can force that liar to tell you everything, and even than you won't be able to go public for a long time. So, you're…"

"I'm not leaving the Love Me section." I finish for her, having heard this speech before. At first, I thought she was reiterating her dislike for Ren, but I've come to realize that it's more of an invitation for me to talk about him. Wanting to ignore Ren's secrets and lies, I focus on the other aspect of our relationship. "I've told you before that we haven't done anything." Kanae nods her head, but I know that she doesn't believe me. She didn't believe me nearly a month ago when she first caught me _sleeping_ with him, and she definitely doesn't believe me now. "Honestly, I'm not ready for that to happen. Even if I were, Ren doesn't want to rush into anything."

"You have a hickey on your neck. I'm sure that is a sign of his noninterest in having sex with you. Didn't we already go over the fact that he is not a virgin? I hope you're not fantasizing that he is some noble prince who's saving himself for marriage." Done with her stacks of documents, she opens her locker to pull out her clothes. I sneak into mine while she's distracted, so she can't ask me about the folder I've yet to dispose of. I've been carrying it around with me, afraid of throwing it away somewhere it will be discovered.

"If you haven't done anything, why do you always sneak off to sleep with him?" I don't always sneak off. Some nights I fall asleep before she does. "When I'm not there do you even bother with the ruse of going to separate beds, or do you just go straight to his room."

"I don't sleep in his bed when you're not over. I rarely sleep at his place without you."

I don't tell her that Ren won't allow me to stay in his room when nobody else is around. He says he doesn't trust himself, and I'm not sure how much I trust myself.

"How far down do the hickeys go?" Chiori asks, pulling at the collar of my shirt. I blush, insisting there's only one. I'd forgotten it was there, and Ren must have smeared the makeup that was covering it.

"Even one is too much. He's an actor, he should know better than to leave marks on you. What if one of those pests had spotted you and taken a picture?" Kanae has a point, if I were more famous, a kiss mark like this would be a problem. "You were just thinking that you're not famous enough for it to be a problem, but people have been talking about you lately. You still have rumors going around about you and Yashiro-san. It's weirdly popular. People actually ship you."

"Ship?"

"Yeah, it's short for relationship. They like the thought of you two dating. It's a love story that people want proof of," Chiori explains. "Don't you pay attention to the lingo people use?"

I've been scolded twice now about paying more attention to the public. I thought I had been, but evidently not enough.

"Doesn't it bother people that he's so much older? I thought Tsuruga-san was bad enough with four years, but Yashiro-san is almost ten years her senior. That's way too old to be chasing a teenager," Kanae remarks, her eyes on my bag. "By the way what are you hiding in there?"

A jolt of fear runs through me and I pull out my notebook. "We should go get stamped before Yashiro-san comes to get us." I run out the door before either of my friends can say anything.

To my surprise, Yashiro-san is not waiting for us. Confused, I walk over to the tall man who's come to pick me up, as my friends fall back.

"Taisho-san, why do you have Tsuruga-san's car?" The normally stoic man smiles down at me, holding out his arm.

"I am to be your escort tonight, Kyouko-chan. Your," he pauses, looking mildly annoyed but not angry. "Your gentleman friend took my wife out on a date this afternoon, and we are to meet them for dinner." Saying so many words seems to be difficult for him, almost like he's stumbling over a script. I giggle and take his arm, allowing him to escort me to the car.

 **A/N: This story was not meant to be this long, but here we are on Chapter 21. Next chapter, will Ren get along with Taisho-san? Will dinner go smoothly? Of course not, what would be no fun at all. Happy Halloween everybody. Eat lots of treats and be safe.**


	22. Try, Try Again

"She won't like that," I tell Yukihito in a hushed tone. "That guy never gives up. I don't know what he was thinking requesting Kyouko, he needs to stop stalking her already." Despite how low I'm speaking, the landlord's ears perk up when I say the name.

He glares at me from his place behind the counter. We'd been going over the names of all the knives and their proper usage when Yashiro called me. I've never been more terrified of one man in my entire life, and am thankful for the temporary reprieve. He seemed frustrated when I couldn't figure out what an Usuba knife was for, or the difference between a Honesuki and a Garasuki. In my defense, they're shaped the same, and could probably be used for the same things.

"In any case, I refused the request. With her current schedule, she doesn't really have the time to appear in the music video for a singer from a different agency anyway. Ruriko-chan has suggested to Sawara-san that she wants Kyouko-chan for an upcoming job. Our little girl is becoming so famous," Yukihito squeals, and I pull the phone away from my ear. "Oh, I should let you get back to your lessons. See you later."

"Yeah." Once again I am face to face with the scary landlord. I'd much rather be dealing with his wife, but she's busy getting ready.

"What guy?" His gruff manner of speaking almost has me shaking. I want to impress this guy, but he seems to be goading me into a fight every time he opens his mouth. "Who is stalking Kyouko-chan?"

"Oh, uh, it's nothing to worry about. Fuwa's just a punk kid." A spark of recognition crosses his eyes, as they drift over to examine the blade of his largest knife.

"Fuwa, he's been here a few times," he comments, expertly decimating a carrot. "I don't like that boy." The paper-thin slices bring to mind the image of my own skin being peeled. "At least you're not Fuwa." He doesn't seem all that relieved, glaring at me for a long moment once he sets down the knife.

"Alright, I'm ready for our date!" His wife comes out beaming from ear to ear. She looks as giddy as Yukihito after he interrupted Kyouko and me kissing. It was her idea to call our shopping trip a date, and I get the distinct impression that if I don't humor her, I'll never get on the Taisho-san's good side.

"Right," I hold up her coat for her.

"We'll be back in a little while. Clean up the kitchen and get ready to pick up Kyouko." Her large, gruff husband merely nods his head obediently at her instruction. I leave him my keys as I allow the Okami-san to usher me to the local market.

The things I do for my princess. Here I am with my baseball cap and sunglasses, squeezing fruit to check its freshness. No matter how many times it's explained to me I can't tell the ripe fruit from the unripe or overripe, and the cheaper pack of meat looks exactly the same to me as the more expensive one.

"Do you prefer chicken or beef?" Okami-san asks, holding up two packages. "My husband likes fish, I'll have to show you how to choose that too. Kyouko loves fish."

"I'm not picky. I'll eat whatever I'm told to." She frowns at this, placing both into the cart before choosing a cut of pork and some fish.

"We'll fix that. A man should know what he likes. How else will he know when he's being spoiled by his wife? I cook my husband's favorite foods for his birthday and he cooks mine." She's been dropping hints all day about what a husband should be and do for his wife.

When I first came into the restaurant, she made me bend down to her level so she could examine my face. I have good bone structure, and apparently that's necessary to be a good husband. I'm tall, which she implied is best for a husband, and I don't slouch, which is apparently also important. Her assessment did not seem to please the Taisho-san however, who was quick to add, "Tall is good, but he might be too tall for Kyouko. He can't cook either. Who wants a husband who can't cook?"

They argued for a while, the Okami-san at my defense, reminding him I was trying to learn. That's when she decided that I needed to go shopping first to learn the basics.

"What will you make for dessert? Kyouko-chan likes sweets, you know, though my husband doesn't. Do you like them?" She stares at me expectantly. "Maybe mochi, if it's not too sweet. I'm not a big fan of sweets, but I'm happy to make whatever Kyouko likes." Her face scrunches up again, and she takes my hand, leading me to the candy like a child.

"How can your wife give you valentines chocolates if you don't like sweets? There are several types of chocolates, you should try them all before you decide you don't like them." My stomach churns at the prospect.

"Okami-san?" I look to the side, searching for gelatin.

"Hmm?" She's reading the ingredients on a box of chocolates.

"Do you know how to make wine jelly?"

She beams up at me. "Of course, my husband has a special recipe for the restaurant. We taught it to Kyouko a while ago."

She sets out collecting the ingredients while I find the perfect glass for Kyouko. I'd prefer to special order something custom fit for a princess, but there isn't time for that. Instead, I find a clear set that shimmers blue and purple in the light.

"Is there anything else?" I ask, mostly to distract her as the cashier rings us up. She goes over her list and reads off her coupons, making sure we have everything we need. Satisfied that her list is complete, she pulls her wallet out. "Could you tell me again how to tell which chicken is freshest?" I ask, holding up the package and pretending to examine it. Taking it from me, she begins to explain something about the color.

I pay for the groceries as the Okami-san moves on to the tenderness of different cuts and the subtle differences in the flavors. None of it makes sense to me and I doubt it ever will.

"We'll have to do this again, I'm afraid I still don't understand." I tell her, carrying the bags as we leave the store.

"Oh, let me help you with those." Okami-san offers, but I shake my head.

"This is for you, for helping me." I hand her a bag with two boxes of chocolates. "One is for Kyouko." We walk back to the restaurant to find that the Taisho-san has left already. He has an appointment at a hair salon, which greatly amused his wife.

"That man has been cutting his own hair for decades. I'm surprised he accepted the gift." I paid for him to go to a fancy salon and spa for celebrities. Okami-san seemed a little disappointed until I told her that she would be going this weekend with Kyouko.

"Now we will practice until you can either prep food properly or chop off a finger. Either one will work for my husband." My hands are placed on the large knife that had been left out.

I try not to be afraid of her overly excited smile. Despite her friendliness, she probably wouldn't hesitate to hand me over to her husband if I do something wrong.

"Remember to keep your fingers tucked in. Always use a sharp knife on a stable cutting surface." I do as she instructs, but still end up with uneven results. The kind woman is stern as she forces me to cut onion after onion. I almost miss her husband's silent demeanor. "I thought you said Kyouko taught you how to do this," she mumbles and I sigh, realizing I'm not as helpful in the kitchen as Kyouko lead me to believe.

"I'm afraid this is hopeless." I admit in earnest, setting down the knife.

"Nonsense," Okami-san pulls out some meat before instructing me to properly wash the rice. "I'm sure we'll find something that you can do."

Somehow, I manage to both burn and undercook the rice. The pork is charred black and inedible, and my carrots have turned to mush. Despite following her instructions word for word, everything is impressively disastroys. As I clean up and prepare to begin again, I silently pray that Yashiro-san never accepts a role for me where I have to cook.

By the time the Taisho-san returns with Kyouko, I am slumped over a table wishing for death, leaving Okami-san to finish cooking dinner. Taisho-san glares at me and I swear I could hear him whispering, "I told you so," to his wife. Kyouko kneels at my side, petting my head.

"Aw, Ren you tried to cook for me." She says poking at the one thing on the table I was able to produce. "Well at least the rice is passable." She soothes as she sets down the shamoji and pets my head some more. Yes, only the bottom third of the rice burned and cemented itself to the rice cooker. I'll have to buy them a new one.

I lift up my head and stare at my impossibly sweet girlfriend. How will I ever make myself good enough to deserve her?

I flick the pink bandana wrapped around her neck. "What's that for?"

"Oh…um," she touches the bandana, emblazoned with the Love Me logo. "You see, Taisho-san saw my neck and, well... he thought it was inappropriate, and he was upset by it and it was making him drive erratically and…" I place my hand over her mouth, hoping to stop her from getting more worked up, since that will only make the situation worse.

"Breathe, then speak." She takes a couple of deep breaths before removing the bandana, revealing the kiss mark I left on her neck. "He saw that?" She nods, pressing her lips together. "I have no hope of getting him to like me now, do I?"  
"He hasn't thrown you out yet." Kyouko shrugs, looking worried.

" _Yet_." I say placing my head back on the table.

"If you want to keep it that way, I'd suggest lifting your head off the table. It's not very polite." I think she's bullying me, but I obey anyway. "How did you convince them to close the restaurant early?" She asks, eyeing me suspiciously. "You didn't pay them off, did you?"

"No." Though the thought had crossed my mind. "They said that they were already planning on taking a few days off for a health and safety check. I was treated to a speech about a man needing to take pride in his home."

"Well, thank you for trying. No one has ever tried so hard to do something they are bad at just for me." There's a wicked glint in her eyes and I can tell she's enjoying my utter failure.

"That's because nobody sucks at anything as much as I do at cooking." I mope, fishing for a pity kiss.

"Except your mother, who can't even work a microwave. You can make popcorn and I've seen you make coffee and tea before. Can your mom make tea or coffee?" I shake my head.

"She can't even make toast. I mastered that at age twelve, I mean as long as you don't mind your toast a little burnt around the edges." I think for a moment about the last time I had to endure my mother's cooking. "She can pour juice from a carton."

Kyouko giggles at this as the Okami-san brings out the food she prepared. After I turned the fish into rocks and over seasoned the beef, I was deemed unteachable and banished from the kitchen with my pathetic bowl of rice. Somehow the older woman had salvaged the beef for us to have an actual meal. Her husband grumbles something about men who cannot cook being useless and poor providers.

"Shameless for a guy that age to leave a mark on an innocent young girl." The comment is whispered to his wife but I hear it loud and clear. I cough, trying not to choke on my water.

"They're young." His wife replies wistfully. "I seem to recall my father not being very fond of you." She turns to me as we all fill our plates. "Tsuruga-san, you said your mother can't cook, what about your father?"

"Ren's dad is an excellent cook. We're going to cook together soon." I bite my tongue not wanting to break her heart in front of them. Did I promise her that they would cook together?

"You've met his parents?" Taisho asks shooting me a glare.

"Well, no, not yet." Large honey-colored eyes look at me and I almost confess to her right then. How much longer can I keep denying her access to that part of my life?

"My parents don't live in Japan. My mom stays in America mostly, and dad travels for business a lot. I don't know when they'll be in Japan." I watch her eyes darken the slightest bit as sadness creeps into them.

Okami-san asks no more questions, leaving me to agonize over how to relieve the pain I just caused. We eat in silence, Kyouko keeping her eyes downcast so I can't tell what she's thinking. I can usually guess from her expression what's going through her mind but she keeps her face a careful blank slate. Kyouko eats most of the rice, for my sake. I pick at my food, not hungry as usual, until Taisho-san scolds me.

"No wonder he can't cook, he barely eats. What? Worried you might gain weight? Be a man and eat." He demands, piling my plate full. It's almost as though he's trying to ease the tension.

"Taisho-san, please don't force Ren to eat all that." Kyouko takes food off my plate, placing it on her own and earning a grumble, but I swear I see the faintest smile tug at his lips.

"Oh!" Okami-san jumps up and heads to the kitchen after finishing her meal. She comes back with a tray and I groan, anticipating the worst. Kyouko clears a space on the table for the tray of murky green and orange jelly that was supposed to be a vibrant red.

Lifting a glass in her hand Kyouko examines the jelly. "How much did these glasses cost?" I guess she can't think of anything nice to say about my dessert. Taisho doesn't bother to hide his laugh.

"Oh, you two." Okami-san scolds and Kyouko flinches, smiling sheepishly at me. "I think they set nicely. As for the color, well, I'm not sure how… well, we should taste it at least." She says, picking up her spoon but not daring to take a bite.

They all look at me expectantly.

I guess since I did make it I should be the first to die from it. I dip my spoon into the dessert and bring a small amount to my mouth. With six eyes trained on me, leaning in closer as I place the spoon in my mouth and swallow the dubious looking concoction. I take a moment to recover from the shock of finding that it tastes pretty good. It's nothing compared to Kyouko's of course, but it is at least palatable.

"Well?" Kyouko prods me for a reaction.

"It's not bad." I answer wide eyed, still surprised myself.

Kyouko giggles before turning to her own glass and taking a spoonful. She makes a sound as she mulls over the sweet before continuing to eat it. Okami-san follows suit, but the Taisho-san waits for all of us to be finished before he takes a bite while glaring at me.

"Hmph." He stands up and goes to the kitchen where I hear the water turn on and a low grumble. "At least he isn't Fuwa."

"You hear that, Princess, I'm not Fuwa. That's my only redeeming quality." I say to Kyouko as she examines the glass again.

"Well I thought your dessert was lovely. It tastes more like wine than it's meant to, but some people prefer the alcohol taste to the strawberry jelly." Okami-san says taking the glass out of Kyouko's hand. "You should say thank you, asking how much a gift costs is a little rude. I'll go make us some tea."

Kyouko pouts at being scolded, and I flick the bandana she tied back around her neck.

"As it turns out I am incapable of learning how to cook." I say leaning in close to her. "I guess all you'll get for your birthdays are expensive gifts and something that can be made in the microwave." I kiss behind her ear and whisper. "I don't want food for my birthdays, unless it's served on you."

"Ren!" I cover my laugh as she turns beet red. There's a splash in the kitchen and the Okami-san giggles. "Ren, you behave yourself or Taisho-san will..." the sudden vibration of her phone causes her whole body to shake, interrupting whatever she was about to say. She pulls it out and her face instantly turns violent as she sees the number. I pluck the phone from her hand while she's too busy growling at it to notice.

"Fuwa, what a pleasant surprise. I was just talking to my manager about you." I use my most gentlemanly voice and listen patiently as the boy screams at me about answering Kyouko's phone. "Fuwa, she's changed her number multiple times to avoid calls from you. This is not me controlling who she talks to, this is me taking over dealing with a pest she has expressed the need to be rid of."

"Just put the damn whore on the phone!" He screams and I hear the phone begin to crack in my hands.

"Let me make myself clear Fuwa. Call my girlfriend again and I will break every bone in your worthless body. Come near her again and I will kill you." I hang up on him irritated over his insults. No matter how nice I try to be he has to bark like the disobedient pup he is.

Kyouko is staring at me with that look in her eyes. The one she gets when Kuon has crossed the line, it's something akin to fear.

"I should go help Okami-san with the tea." She stands up but stumbles as she begins to walk on shaky legs.

"Kyouko?" I am beside her ready to catch her, but she holds up her hands and swears that she's fine. "I'll just, I'll…"

"Bring me what's on the table then come help wash dishes." Taisho-san orders before I can sit back down. I had forgotten we weren't alone while I was on the phone. Did he hear me threaten to kill Fuwa? "I hope you know how to clean at least."

"Yes, I can clean." I trudge over to the sink to help the brawny man with the dishes.

He hands me a scrub brush and a plate as he asks, "Fuwa?" I'm not sure what the question is but I know I need to answer before he becomes irritated.

"He's an insect who refuses to be squashed. I won't let him ruin everything she's worked for though." Taisho-san nods.

"I'm not her father." He says after a few long minutes of silence.

"I know."

"You don't need my permission to date her."

"I know." Since when do I have such a limited vocabulary?

"Thank you for wanting it." He hands me another plate and I see the faintest pink hue coloring his cheeks before his eyes narrow. "That doesn't mean that I like you or think you're good enough for her."

"I'm not. No one will ever be good enough to deserve her." We finish the dishes in silence. It isn't exactly comfortable, but it's less tense than before.

"At least you're not Fuwa," Taisho-san concludes, leaving me to finish cleaning the mess I made in the kitchen. I release a sigh of relief knowing that I have at least one thing going for me. "And if I see another one of those things on her neck you're the one who will end up with broken bones!" I nearly drop a knife on my foot. I'd been hoping he wouldn't mention that.

"Honey!" Okami-san admonishes her husband as Kyouko chokes on her tea.

When it's time for me to leave, Okami-san has to drag her husband away by the hand to get him to leave us alone as Kyouko walks me to the door.

"Thank you for the rice and the wine jelly." Kyouko makes no effort to pretend she doesn't find pleasure in being better at cooking than I am.

"You're very welcome, princess." I kiss her forehead, wishing this strange tension between us would go away, or at the very least that one of us would be brave enough to acknowledge it.

"Ren?" I can see her struggle with her words. I don't know what she wants to ask me or if I'll be able to answer. She lowers her head.

"What's wrong." I try to sound calm, like I haven't noticed that she's become more and more afraid of me. She inhales a deep breath, looking me in the eyes.

"What you said to Shoutaro. You wouldn't actually hurt him, would you?" That can't be what's bothering her. Why would she care if I hurt him?

"He's lucky I don't kill him for the things he says about you. Rock stars must live easy lives, it's like he has all this free time to harass you." I really would kill him if she'd let me. That doesn't seem to be the correct response though, and I can't help but be a little jealous that after all he's done she still cares about that jackass. "Don't worry, I can control myself. As long as he keeps himself away from you he's safe."

Kyouko stares at the floor for a moment. "Goodnight Ren." Her kiss is sudden and fleeting against my cheek before she bows and says goodbye.

I pull her into a tight embrace, planting kisses all over her face. "I love you." I whisper in her hair.

"I love you, Ren." I should ask what's bothering her. What about my threatening Fuwa makes her quiver as she breathes my name? I should bring up what I told her about Rick and tell her the whole story. I should tell her about my parents.

"Goodnight, princess." I can't force my tongue to form the words. How could she still love me after she knows the truth of what I've done? When she finds out that her fairy prince is really a monster, how could she ever forgive me? For the time when we were kids, I could explain that I was a child and I only wanted to cheer her up. But what could I say about Guam? It would be obvious that I lied out of guilt and fear, as well as the desire to spend time with her as a friend instead of a sempai.

With a final kiss to her temple, I exit the restaurant. Yukihito is waiting in my car he was dropped off half an hour ago and has been circling the block since. There's no chance the paparazzi will ever find out I spent the evening here. As far as they know, I took the late afternoon off and went home for the remainder of the day. Leaving my car with my manager to take Kyouko to her jobs.

"Did you manage to make anything good to eat?" He teases when I slump into the front seat.

"Shut up." He drops me off and I head to my apartment while listening to a message the president left for me.

"Ren, I need to speak with you right away about J…" I hang up the phone seeing a drunken blond slumped over my door.

"Kyouko! Kyouko I know you're in there!" How the hell did this idiot find out where I live, let alone get passed security? "Kyouko!"

"Go home, Fuwa." I lift him by his shirt collar and fling him away from my door.

"Kyouko?" I enter my apartment and begin to shut the door on the fool. He looks like a pathetic mess with a bottle of beer spilled at his side. What would Kyouko think of me if I left him here and something happened to him? "Where are you hiding Kyouko, you bastard?" He yells at the wall most likely mistaking it for me. "You'll kill me? I'll kill you!" I hear a crack as his fist connects with the wall and I wince in pain just looking at him.

"Fuck." I grab his collar and drag him into the apartment. "Don't vomit on my couch." I warn him before tossing him down not caring if he gets hurt when he lands. "And stay out of the bedrooms. Bathroom is that way, kitchen is through there." He glares up at me with glazed over eyes.

"I'm gonna kick your ass." He slurs taking a swing at the arm of the couch.

"Sure, you do that. I'm going to bed." Even with the door shut I can hear the idiot throw a fit as he fights me in the dark. Eventually he goes quiet, after I hear a couple of crashes and something break. I only hope it wasn't the TV. I need that for movie night with the Love Me girls, Amamiya-san is addicted to those horror movies.

 **A/N: The link to Dramatic Love Album was mostly me being lazy. I needed a name for the photographer for RMandy and I remembered that Nakamura had a previous story about a model and photographer. Anyway thank you for the reviews and everything. I hope you like what's coming next, it gets a little crazy.**


	23. Out Of Control

My mind is stuck on 'he's lucky I don't kill him'. Is that a joke, or would Ren really murder Shoutaro just for insulting me? 'I killed him.'

"I can't take this anymore!" I scream at the empty room. It's been hours since he left and I know the Taisho and Okami-san are asleep. They're used to my frequent outbursts at night by now anyway.

'Why won't Shoutaro just go away? He's lucky I don't kill him.' Would Ren seek him out to take care of the pest before he could harass me again? I pick up my phone needing to call Ren. I dial the number, but quickly hang up. If I can't sleep, why should he? I press redial, but hang up before it starts ringing. He should be up, thinking about what he said. He should be here explaining what he meant. I should have asked him about it when it happened. Now I've waited too long and I'm too afraid to ask.

My phone ringing startles me.

"Moko-san?" I answer, checking the time. She never calls this late.

"Moko-san? Is that all you have to say. Moko-san!" Kanae screams at me over the phone. "You call and hang up twice, and all you can say to me is 'Moko-san'? What the hell Kyouko?"

"What?" I look at the phone to see that I've been calling her instead of Ren. "I'm sorry Moko-san. I must have called you by accident."

"Two times?" She grates out exasperated. Maybe I subconsciously called her. I have been wanting to talk.

"Moko-san, do you think I'm a foolish girl for loving Ren so much?" What if he really did kill his friend? What if he snaps and does something to someone else? It's happened before.

"Yes." Kanae answers bluntly. "I think the two of you are idiots who are way too in love. You've been dating long enough the honey moon phase should be over. Start acting like a normal couple who can't stand each other already."

I smile sadly, knowing that's her way of trying to reassure me. "Do you think he's a bad person?" I've been sitting with this secret for too long. It's gnawing at my brain with a desperate urging for me to ask him to explain. He looked too broken; too much like a child clinging to his last shred of hope. I just can't bring myself to ask.

"No, he's not a bad guy. That's what makes him so annoying. If he could get rid of his bad habit of tricking you, he'd be perfect. He treats you like a princess which makes me want to rip my eyes out and blow out my own eardrums. Though if he didn't treat you this way, I would not permit him to be near you." There is a pause with only the sound of her yawn before she asks, "Did someone say he was a bad guy? If it was Fuwa, you can just ignore everything that guy says."

I shake my head, forgetting that she can't see me. "No, it's just something Ren said. I really think he might hurt anybody who caused me harm. Is that okay? Should I not question his violence if it's only used to protect me?"

"What, like he said he'd hit Fuwa? I might actually start to like him if he beat up that jerk." Kanae gives me a fake laugh, trying to bring some levity into the conversation.

"Yeah, something like that. I'm sorry I disturbed you so late. Please go back to sleep." My voice is flat, and I know she can tell something's wrong.

"Kyouko?"

"Goodnight, Kanae. I'll talk to you later. I need some time to think. I promise I'll tell you what I can later."

"As long as you're ok, I guess I can wait for an explanation. Are you okay?" Her concern brings a smile to my face.

"Yes, I am. Don't worry about me, I have you and Ren to protect me." I hang up and lay my head on the pillow, willing myself to fall asleep.

I take deep breaths pretending that my hand caressing my stomach is Ren's. He does that sometimes when I sleep over. His thumb slips beneath my shirt and draws warm, soothing circles on my abdomen. Or his fingers will skim up my sides to my ribcage and back down. It warms up my insides and lulls me to sleep, as he whispers a story in my ear.

Before long I am asleep and dreaming that I am in his bed, only he isn't there with me. I sit up and open my mouth to call to him, but no sound comes out. Fear grips my heart and I try again to scream for him, desperately looking around. He's here in the dim room, just out of my reach, and he isn't alone.

"Let me see the whore." Shoutaro demands, trying to shove passed Ren. Only, it isn't Ren exactly, but a man closer to Cain or even BJ - more animal than man; untamed like a wild beast. The darkness of his gaze stirs something inside me, and I am not only afraid for Shou, but also anticipating what this wild man will do to me when he's finished with Shou.

There's no emotion in his eyes as his fist connect with Shoutaro's face. Blood splatters across his cheek, smearing along his fists as he drops Shou. His teeth are bared in a murderous grin, and he turns to me, every bit the beast he warned me he was. He glides toward me, pulling me into his bloody embrace, and kisses me hungrily. This is nothing like his gentle loving kisses. It's harsh and forceful and I cannot catch my breath to voice a protest. I've had dreams like this before, but I could always speak in them; had some power to resist if I wanted to. This wild man isn't Ren, he's forceful and cruel. I push against him with all my strength, hoping to shove him off, but he pins me down with his blood-slicked hands. I cry out for Ren to save me from this man who isn't him.

"Remmpf!" I catch my scream in my hands as I wake up. I wince, feeling the pool of warmth clinging to my thighs. What is wrong with me that a dream like that could cause such a reaction? Disgusted, I rush to the bathroom to clean myself.

This is too much for me, and I need answers that I think only Ren can give. Except, how do I ask my adoring boyfriend if he's a murderer? I tiptoe down the stairs to my bike and pull on my shoes as I hop on. In my haste I fall off, luckily only scraping my elbow. Ignoring the sting as the air hits the broken skin, I pedal as quickly as I can to Ren's.

I stop in front of the apartment door, staring at my keycard in my hand. Now what do I do? If I don't do something, the secrets between us will make the strain on our relationship even worse. I imagine that he will start to hear the question forming on the tip of my tongue every time we speak. _Did you murder your friend?_

With no other option, I let myself in, stopping in the doorway and leaning against the door in the dark. I can hear the TV playing an interview of me. Peaking around the corner I see what looks like the scene of a crime. There's glass on the floor and a chair is turned over. A torn jacket and shirt are strewn across the floor and someone's shoes. They look like Shoutaro's things and a vision of Ren covered in blood flashes through my mind.

"Ren!" I stumble through his apartment to his room calling out for him. "Ren!" I hit a solid mass when I enter his room and cling to the warmth, recognizing his smell immediately. "Ren." I sigh, content to find him unharmed, and though slightly disheveled, he isn't covered in blood.

"Wha…" he wraps me in his arms and breathes in my scent. "Sweetheart, what's wrong?"

"What's wrong? Your living room is a wreck. I thought something happened. I thought…" I freeze, not wanting to admit what I thought.

He kisses my hair. "Kyouko, you're shaking." Rubbing my arms, he pulls me into his room. "It's late, let's get you to bed. You have school in a few hours." With gentle concern, he takes the arm I scraped and gently kisses it.

I let him lead me to his bed, forgetting for a moment about the clothes in the living room.

For a moment he leaves me alone, returning with a first aid kit. "What are you even doing here this late?" He asks, sitting me on the bed.

"I was sleeping," I say, swallowing the large lump in my throat as he sanitizes the wound. "Of course, I was sleeping and I was dreaming. I was dreaming. It was just a dream, but there was blood and you, you were covered in blood. I was scared, and I..." I know that I'm not making any sense, but he listens patiently as I rant about the blood and the lion-like violent man.

"Oh, sweetheart, you came over here at this hour because of a bad dream?" He doesn't sound mocking, but sincere and concerned.

That's right, it was only a dream. I overreacted and rushed over here to prove to myself that there was no monster. And what exactly would I have done if I found him covered in blood, and wearing that vicious grin on his face? Just thinking about it strangles the air from my lungs.

"Kyouko, breathe. Look at me." Holding my face in his hands he lowers me to the bed, leaning over me. I see the dream with that beast of a man holding me down. "Hey, where are you in that head of yours?" His fingers skim over my face. "Look at me, there's no blood. I'm not hurt. Everything's alright." Gentle kisses soothe me, once again reminding me that no matter how real the dream felt, that's all it was. Ren would never hurt me. One of his hands trails down my torso and back up, sliding beneath the fabric of my shirt. His thumb rubs calming circles on my stomach, so much more soothing than when I do it.

"I'm really tired, Ren," I confess, wishing that I only meant physically. My brain is too overwrought with worry and fear to rest.

"Sleep, silly girl. I'm here now, and I'll keep you safe. No more nightmares." I stare up at him for a moment. Nightmares? Shoutaro had been in my dream, is that why the jacket and shoes looked like his in the dark?

"Ren, who else is here? Who did that to your apartment?" I ask, sitting up suddenly. Had I imagined that his normally impeccable apartment was trashed?

"Did what?" He follows me out to the living room and sees the mess. "That's what that sound was." He says absentmindedly, picking up a broken piece of glass. "Jackass broke your vase."

"Shoutaro?" My nemesis sits up in a daze. One of his eyes is swollen and bruised. There is blood trailing down his nose, and a cut on his cheek. He waves at me, blood pooling around glass fragments stuck in his skin. "What is this? what did you do?" I ask Ren, worried about what the media will say about him now. His reputation will be ruined because of me. "Oh, Ren, why would you do this?"

"You think I did this?" Ren motions to the room and then to Shoutaro. I can hear the sadness in his voice, knowing that I'd think of him that way.

"I honestly don't know what I think right now. I'm tired. You have secrets and you lie and my mind makes things up. You know I have an active imagination, but you insist on keeping your answers vague and saying terrible things about killing people, and I can't figure out if I want you to do things to me or if I should be afraid of you." I keep rambling, knowing that my brain is overstressed and tired from weeks of saying nothing.

"Kyouko…" Ren reaches for my shaking shoulders.

"You should be afraid of him. Your boyfriend attacked me. I came here to talk things out with him and he started hitting me," Shoutaro sneers, and for a moment I can see that happening. Not the way he claims, of course, he would have showed up screaming and demanding entrance while insulting me. I wouldn't really blame Ren for punching him once or twice.

"Shut up Fuwa. The only time I touched you was to drag your sorry ass off the floor." The two of them hurl insults at each other. I grip Ren's arm to keep him closer to me than Shoutaro.

"I've never met a more violent or deranged man in my life. I'd never forgive myself if I left her with you and she ended up getting hurt." Shou tries to play the valiant knight, as if I would ever believe that.

"Just get out!" Ren's voice startles me and I squeeze his arm, feeling his strong muscles tense like he's ready to beat Shou within an inch of his life if he doesn't leave.

"You see how violent he is, Kyouko. With that kind of temper, he's bound to hurt you." He risks moving closer to me and reaches for my hand. "Come with me."

Ren shoves him away. "Don't touch her."

Shou snorts, "Who you telling not to touch her? Looks like you've done plenty of touching. I guess she isn't the pure maiden she claims." He points to my neck in disgust. "Did you actually let him do that, or does he hold you down and take what he wants. Guys like him are used to getting whatever they want, aren't they? Did he promise you a nice cushy ride to the top if you spread your legs like a good little girl?"

"That's enough. _Get out._ " Though Ren doesn't scream, I know he's close to losing it; I can see the anger boiling beneath his skin. His muscles contract, like a lion ready to attack his prey. Shamefully, I clench my thighs, anticipating the feel of those strong hands pulling my body close to his.

"Kyouko." Shou tries again. Putting away his insults to try to fool me, as though I will somehow forget what he just accused me of. "He's violent, you know he is. It won't take long for him to turn his violence on you. He probably gets all that anger from being such a mediocre, talentless prettyboy, skating by on his looks. I bet he'd had a million little girls like you, Kyouko, and once you're eighteen he'll be done with you. Pass you on to the next guy to be used up and…"

"Shut up Shoutaro." He flinches, seeing me move closer to Ren. "If Ren did hit you, you deserved it, and more."

"Whatever, stay here and play house. Don't call me when he starts beating on you." Shou walks away grabbing his shoes and jacket as he leaves.

"I should go home," I say, after a few minutes of standing still with Ren's eyes boring into me. I make a move for the door, but he seizes my wrist and pulls me to him. "Ren let me go home. I'm tired."

"Which is why you should go to sleep now." He points me towards my bedroom and gives me a light shove.

"I want to go home." I need to get away from him. Somewhere I can think. I can't do that when he's around soothing away all my worries.

"Kyouko, it's three in the morning and you're in pajamas." Were I better rested, I know that I would understand why he wants me to stay.

"So what?" I want to leave. He's a liar and I can't stand it. He'll soothe my nerves and make me forget about all my questions until later when I am at home trying to sleep again.

"I don't have my car to drive you, and I'm not letting you go on your bike at this hour." He places his hands on my shoulders and begins walking me toward my room, as if I'm a child.

"You didn't say anything about Shoutaro going out this late. He doesn't even have a bike." My tired brain is grasping at straws, and I don't even know why I'm fighting him on this.

"He's a big boy, he can take care of himself." Ren grits out through clenched teeth.

"And I can't because I'm a girl?" Why am I so angry?

"I didn't say that." I thought love was supposed to be easy. That when we both felt the same way, everything was supposed to click into place. We're supposed to be happy, like a fairytale. He's supposed to tell me all his secrets and be kind and sweet and... and...

"Then I'm going." I say trying to shove passed him. His arm around my waist lifts me off the floor, and he carries me to my room, throwing me onto the bed and causing my brain to flash with images from my dream.

Ren stares down at me, his expression grim. "It wouldn't matter to me if Fuwa gets mugged, or winds up dead in a ditch somewhere. He can go out at whatever time he wants, dressed however he wants and get himself mobbed by a bunch of overzealous fans. But nothing bad is going to happen to you. I care about you too much to let you go out by yourself dressed like that, at this hour, and especially when you're sleep deprived. There are too many variables; too many things could go wrong."

I release a long, slow sigh. With my head on the pillows it's so much harder to fight him. I'm so tired. I roll onto my side refusing to look at him. He stirs up my insides even when he's glaring at me like that and it's so confusing. Am I mad at him, or do I want him to press me into the mattress and have his way with me? This isn't how love is supposed to be. Every example I have to go on is sweet and the girl is cute and innocent and the man is caring and gentle. I always thought that that was what I wanted. Easy, simple; like Cinderella. I thought I stopped wanting that until this stupid man came along. Now I don't know what I want, but I know I have become something other than innocent and kind and sweet.

Gentle lips press against my temple. "I love you."

"You didn't have to hit Shoutaro to prove it to me," I say, instead of, if you love me so much, then tell me your damned secrets.

"I didn't touch your precious, Prince Shou." He growls in my ear, sending a thrill through me. No, I am anything but innocent.

"You expect me to believe that? You threatened to kill him, and then hours later I walk in to find him bloody and beaten. What is wrong with you? Why are you so violent? First those random guys who hit on Setsu, then Murasame, and now Shou. Should I say Shou again? Last time you were jealous of him it was me who faced your wrath. I'm surprised Hikaru is still alive the way you behave…" Sad eyes silence me.

"Is that what you think of me? That I'm violent and jealous?" He backs away from me, sitting on the edge of the bed. "I suppose I am jealous. You care so much about Fuwa, that's the only reason I even tried to help him." I open my mouth, but the only thing that wants to come out is, _did you kill your friend?_ I can't ask that now. "Am I always going to have to compete with him?"

Say something! The voices in my head scream at me to speak, but I'm just too tired. I roll over, staring away from him.

When I finally get my lips to move, only horrible words come out. "You're a liar. I can't trust anything you say." I hear him sob at my words, and then his weight is lifted from the bed. I don't look to see if he left.

He isn't home when I wake up. It's nearly noon and he had a job early in the morning. I should have apologized for my behavior before falling asleep. My legs quiver at the thought that he might be angry at me, but it isn't fear that I'm feeling. I think part of me wants him to be mad, to be riled up and in that animalistic state from my dreams. What is he waiting for? He's always so in control of his emotions and his secrets, it's as if he doesn't trust me with his deepest self or his body. And if I can't have one, then I want the other. It would only be right for him to give me something.

I sit down to eat the bland eggs I cooked too quickly. If I'm not careful, I'll turn into Ren, I think, spitting out an eggshell.

"I should go to school," I conclude, after twenty minutes of poking at my cold, runny, and unseasoned eggs. My hand doesn't move to stop mushing them around, and I don't move to get dressed and leave.

Everything ended up so crazy last night, especially me, but he remained calm and loving. That man has too much patience. He even tried to cook for me. I laugh, remembering the awful color of his jelly. How did he even do that?

Wait a minute! I jump up, realizing what he said last night.

"His parents live in America!" It makes sense now. That rude shrug of his, and tentakomai. Those jobs he mentioned before his debut must have been over there. That's why the media doesn't know, and his name, it must be English. Greg or Larry, maybe. I cringe, thinking of the most generic American names that I can. That must be why he has a stage name. "I bet it's Phillip or Adam, like a prince. Maybe Eric or Christopher, or Flynn or Eugene."

The front door opens suddenly startling me. I hear a whistle and a worried voice calls my name.

"Yashiro-san, what are you doing here?" I step out of the kitchen to greet my worried manager, who is taking in the sight of the disheveled living room.

"Ren sent me to check on you. You haven't been answering your phone." I press my lips together and look down at my pants where there should be a pocket.

"I left it at home," I shrug. I wonder if Yashiro-san knows that Ren's American.

"Well, Ren was worried about you." I smile, can't he ever just let me be mad at him? "You should use my phone to call him."

Hmph, or I should let him worry. There I go again, wanting to rile him up. "Actually, I should go to school," I decide, walking right past him, and ignoring the phone held out in front of me. "Will you drop me off?" Yashiro-san nods, his face falling.

I couldn't call Ren if I wanted to. All I want is to ask my questions, and I can't do that over the phone. I need to confront him, but also to apologize for my behavior.

I know he didn't hit Shoutaro. If he had, the idiot would've been a lot more beat up. If I'd been less tired and not so plagued by wanton thoughts, I wouldn't have fought with him. I would have gone to bed quietly without protest, or maybe I wouldn't have come over in the first place.

Yashiro-san leaves me at school with my bike. I have no other work today, so I go to the Darumaya and work after school. Taisho-san mentions that he didn't see me leave in the morning, his eyes narrowed in suspicion as he scans my face.

Okami-san giggles, pulling me away from him. "Come Kyouko-chan, we have a new customer." She pulls me over to a private room, and I fear for a moment that it might be Shoutaro.

"President!" I gasp, shocked by the large man seated on the floor and sipping tea.

"Mogami-kun, I like your restaurant." He smiles warmly, before gesturing to his companion. "I have a friend who wishes to meet you. It's best to keep it a secret though."

For a moment, I'm blinded by the beauty of the woman sitting across from him. Sparkling emeralds look up at me from the pale face of an angel. Smooth, blonde waves fall passed the elegant shoulders of her slender figure. With the beauty and grace of a royalty, I think that this must be Corn's mother. But how would the president know the fairy queen?

 ***Bonus* - the hickey**

"If you don't behave yourself I'm going to punish you." Ren warns playfully.

"What did I do?" I have no idea what he's talking about. We were having lunch in L.A. Hearts when a couple of workers came over and asked if I was Natsu. I smiled at them, happy that they seemed to like Natsu even though she's scary. They asked for my autograph and I offered to take my picture with them. They were really nice young men, but Ren didn't seem to like them. It isn't like him to be jealous about not being noticed by fans, so I don't really know what his problem was.

"Just behave yourself." I roll my eyes and stick out my tongue.

"Whatever _Nii-san_." Sometimes I think he brings out the Setsu in me on purpose. He leans over the table, a dangerous gesture in such a public place.

"Careful love, you wouldn't want Cain to show up here. He isn't as conscious of his reputation as I am." In other words, Cain wouldn't hesitate to punish me in public, and Ren will wait until we're alone.

I still don't know what I did. It doesn't matter anyway, I'm used to his punishments now. All he does is whisper in my ear about how pretty he thinks I am, and how much he loves me. It's a little weird and embarrassing, but I wouldn't really call it a punishment.

"I should get going soon."  
"I thought you weren't needed on set for a couple of hours?" Ren asks, pretending he isn't hiding his peas in a napkin under the table. Sometimes he's just like a child.

"Koga-san is filming a big action sequence today that I really want to watch." It's our biggest action scene in the film, and I'm really excited to see how the scene is choreographed. Then of course, Moko-san will elegantly interrupt the fight to protect her love.

"I told you to behave." Ren sighs, turning my smile from thinking of Kanae into a pout. What did I do? "I'll be waiting for you in the Love Me room," he says, cleaning up his food and walking in that direction.

If I make him wait, he'll punish me by complimenting me in front of people. Last time we were speaking with the president, he told me I look exceptionally lovely. The president wouldn't stop gushing about it to everyone who would listen. That lovemon was disappointed the next day, when I told him it meant nothing and that Tsuruga-san is a just a fake gentleman playboy who compliments young ladies all the time. I count to five before following Ren to the Love Me room. It's better to let him have his fun in there, before he starts blurting out praises left and right.

I enter the room and the door closes behind me. I swallow hard when I hear the lock click. A hand slides down my arm, pulling my back to his chest. His nose grazes my neck and he breathes deep.

"That tickles." My giggle turns into a moan, as his tongue presses flat against my skin and he draws it up to my jaw in in a long slow lick. "Ren, I thought you were punishing me." He kisses the shell of my ear, but doesn't whisper his sweet ramblings in it.

"Yes, I am." His arms snake around my waist holding me securely in place as he trails his lips down my neck.

I moan, his lips are warm and wet against my skin. "I like this punishment," I whisper, leaning into him and angling to give him better access.

"You won't," he mutters, increasing the pressure of his kisses almost painfully. I wince when he begins to focus on assaulting one spot over and over. Sucking and nibbling so much on my pulse that it makes me dizzy.

It isn't until he concludes his punishment with a soft kiss over the spot and a self-satisfied grin, that I realize what he's done. I scream his name and rush to my locker to pull out a mirror. Sure enough, he left a large, bright, red kiss mark. I pout at his smug expression, and his smile widens.

"I told you to behave yourself."

 **A/N: I have a couple of issues with Julie which will leak into this story. Don't expect her to play nice. Poor Kuon is going to suffer a little but not in the way I intended at first. Still I like the outline I have for the next couple of chapters.**


	24. In Your Warm Arms

**A/N: Please don't hate me, I cried while writing this.**

"Mogami-kun, this is Hizuri Juliana. Kuu's wife." The president introduces me to his gorgeous companion, and for a second, I'm disappointed to learn she is not Corn's mother. Then, my smile brightens as I realize that this is my father's wife.

"Huzuri-san, hello." I bow to her, barely able to contain my excitement. Will she like me?

"Kyouko-chan! It's so good to meet you. Please call me Mother, won't you?" She's up in a flash, wrapping me in her slim arms, and it's a little bit like being hugged by Ren. She smells nice and her arms make me feel safe. I hug her back, wanting to cry a little.

"Mother, when did you get here? Is father with you?" I ask, doing my best to hold back the happy tears. I see Okami-san exit the room, a sad smile on her face and I'm torn between wanting to go after her and staying in this warm embrace.

"Oh, shh!" My new mother holds a finger over her lips. "Your father must not know that I'm here. I'm forbidden from stepping foot in Japan at the moment, and if he ever found out, I'd be in for a world of trouble."

I nod, eager to please this ethereal creature who is cradling my head close to her chest and petting me. Just like a real mother, one who isn't repulsed by my touch or sickened by my existence.

"Well, tell me everything about yourself! Kuu told me, but that man has a tendency to exaggerate. He said that you were very beautiful though, and that has proven to be true." I am dragged down to sit beside her. She pets me as she speaks, and cradles me so close that I'm practically in her lap. It feels a little odd, but not unpleasant. If I were younger, I think I would love to curl up like this and listen to her talk for hours. "You know he praised your acting skills, saying you were very bright, and that you could cook better than he can. I would like to cook with you someday. I bet we would have fun preparing lots of food for Kuu and Kuon."

"Kuon?" I cock my head, looking up at her confused.

"Your brother silly. Although getting him to show up will be next to impossible, but I hear he's fond of y…" The president clears his throat, interrupting her. She bites her lip, looking worried, but she recovers quickly and launches back into her conversation. "Oh! Well he's always working anyway. Like father, like son, so I guess it'll just be you and me for a while. I'll have to go home at the end of the month, but until then I hope we can get together often. I want to take you shopping of course, and your nice landlady. I have to take her out as a thank you for her generosity in caring for you. Then we will go to a spa, a little mother daughter pampering is a must, and I want to go to Tokyo Disney." I can feel my eyes begin to sparkle at this, and she smiles brighter.

"Can we go to Cinderella's castle?" I ask, wishing we were already there.

"Darling, I would rent out the castle and crown you Cinderella for the day, if it would make you happy. We could go this weekend, and there is a Cinderella suite that I could try to get." She ponders for a moment as Okami-san comes in to set food on the table.

"This weekend?" Okami-san asks in a low voice.

"Yes, it'll be so much fun. We can visit all the princesses and eat lots of sweets. I usually avoid sweets because of work, but I hear that Kyouko dear has such a healthy appetite. I feel it is my duty as a mother to indulge with her." Okami-san flinches a little and I feel bad. That's right, I almost forgot that we already have plans this weekend.

"Mother, it's just that Okami-san and I have an appointment this weekend to go to a salon and spa. We are getting manicures and pedicures, and I'm getting my roots touched up while she gets a haircut. It was a gift, and someone already paid for us to go." For a moment she looks a little annoyed, turning to the president with accusing eyes.

"Did you set up this appointment?" She questions him, and I giggle at the president's expression. He appears to be a little frightened of her.

"No, this is the first I'm hearing of it." He says, looking to me.

"Oh, um..." I can't let on that I'm dating Ren. We both agreed that the president doesn't need to know yet. We don't trust him not to go out of his way to throw some over the top and expensive celebration. Still, I have to say something, mother is staring at me with big expectant eyes. "Well Tsuruga-san gifted it to Okami-san. He liked her food so much that he wanted to do something nice for her. He paid for the Taisho-san to get a haircut too."

Okami-san scrunches her brows at me, but nods. "Yes, Tsuruga-san frequents our restaurant. He was here yesterday for quite some time, and informed me that he wanted to pay for Kyouko-chan and me to have a day at a fancy salon and spa." My mother does not look pleased by this.

"Tsuruga Ren?" She asks, her emerald eyes turning hard as she looks at the president. "I heard he had taken an interest in mentoring you Kyouko-chan, but I had not been informed that the two of you were so _close_ that he would visit your place of residence." The entire time she speaks, she is glaring at the president in an accusing way.

Slightly confused I tell her, "Tsuruga-san is my sempai, and he's extremely," I pause to think of a safe word to use... Something that doesn't suggest that we are anything more than a sempai and kohai. "Considerate of others."

"I bet he is." All traces of her previous good nature have melted from her face, and though she is still very beautiful, she no longer looks like a regal, fairy queen. Her expression is too hard; there is too much tension in her forehead, and I get the image of a gorgeous but spiteful sorcerous, like the one who cursed the beast.

"Yes," Okami-san smiles, seeming to catch onto the sudden shift in Juliana's personality. "I have met with him on more than one occasion, and he was always quite the gentleman."

Juliana turns to me, her eyes narrowed, cold. "A man his age visiting a much younger girl, in her home, does not strike me as gentlemanly behavior. What kind of establishment are you running here, that you would accept such a pricey gift for a simple meal? Or was it something else he hoped to buy?" Her eyes scan up and down my body, making me feel like a filthy creature. "I should take Kyouko away from this place immediately, before that man takes advantage of her naivety."

"Mother, I assure you Tsuruga-san is a gentleman. He is generous and supportive, and has no improper intentions towards me." This seems to be the wrong thing to say.

She scoffs, "You sound as if you're in love with him." I freeze, my mouth hanging open. A soft hand touches my face, closing my mouth. It isn't comforting at all, the way she smiles like a snake. "Oh child, in this industry you have to watch out for men like him. It is always the gentlemen who are the worst. The popular ones are used to getting whatever they want, and doing as they please, without consequence. It would be best if from now on you kept away from him." Her voice is too soft and too sweet; it practically oozes venom.

"Mother, Tsuruga-san is my friend. He would never hurt me." I try to reason with her, looking to the president for help.

"That's right Julie, Ren poses no threat to Mogami-kun. He cares about her." His voice stresses this point, but fails to reassure her. Rather, it seems to have the opposite effect as she grips my chin tightly.

"Of course, he does. She's young and stupid, and what man wouldn't appreciate a girl who speaks highly of him with that sparkle in her eyes? A grown man like him preys on little girls like you, who are easy to manipulate and control. I bet every word he has ever said to you has been a lie, designed to get you into bed."

"I…" I can't speak. It's isn't untrue to say that he lies to me and he has manipulated me in some ways. "I…Tsuruga-san hasn't touched me. I… I'm…" I wipe at the tears, pushing her hand away. Why is she acting like this? "Please mother, I promise you that he isn't a bad person. He's good and kind and he…"

"He cares about you? That's probably because you throw yourself at him." I flinch at her accusation. The president calls to her, telling her to calm down, but she ignores him. "I have been in this industry a long time darling, and I can tell you that men like him never actually want little girls like you. You're just easy for them to use and discard when bored. You are liberal with your praises, and satisfy his need to always be right. You're good for his ego, but so is the other girl he's probably with right now. I know him, he hops from one girl's bed to another whenever he feels like…"

"You don't know anything about him!" I insist, wanting to defend Ren. "Tsuruga-san is a gentleman. He does not hop into girl's beds. He isn't…"

"I don't know him? Who do you think you are? I know him better than anyone, I'm his…"

"Juliana, that is enough!" President Takarada slams his hands on the table, silencing the angry sorcerous. "You came here because you were excited to meet Mogami-kun, remember?"

I peek up at her, hoping that the lovely and kind, motherly woman will return. She sits back on her heels, cold, green eyes glaring at me, and I bite my lip to stop it from quivering.

"You didn't tell me that _he_ was," Juliana doesn't finish her sentence, but the president seems to know what she was going to say.

"That's his business and I can see nothing wrong with it. In fact, to me it seemed a good thing. I saw it as his salvation in a way." He motions to me. "Mogami-kun is a good girl. She's Kuu's second child."

"Kuu and I only have one child." She doesn't yell, but somehow, she is all the more frightening speaking in a controlled tone. I flinch, afraid she might slap me when she leans in close. "Kuon is my son and I will not let a starry-eyed little girl like you have him!"

"Hizuri-san, I think it is time for you to leave," Okami-san interrupts, in an equally stern voice. Her arm wraps around my shoulder, lessoning the impact of being rejected by another mother. I lean into her, hugging her waist for comfort. What is wrong with me? Am I not good enough for a mother's love?

"I won't leave until she understands that ku…"

"Juliana, be quiet before you say something you can't take back." The president pulls her up and practically shoves her out the door. "We're leaving. I am very sorry Mogami-kun." It's surprising to see him behave so roughly with her, but she doesn't protest. She leaves without saying another word to me. "I'm sorry." He says sincerely bowing to Okami-san.

Shaking, I collapse into Okami-san's embrace, unable to stop the tears. Okami-san holds me tight, rubbing soothing circles on my back. I don't understand what I did wrong. Why was it bad for me to say nice things about Ren? Or for him to give us a gift? The more I think about it, the less it makes sense. If she was angry about the impropriety of it, why would she turn on me? Shouldn't a mother want to protect her daughter from that sort of thing? She seemed to be accusing me of seducing Ren, more than him of being improper with a younger girl. It seems insane, but I swear there was jealousy in her voice, and what was that about her son?

Okami-san takes my hand and begins to walk me towards the stairs. My legs feel too weak for the trip, and give out beneath me. Taisho-san startles me when his arms lift me up and cradle me to him. I feel so small, like a child, an unwanted child. He carries me to my room and I am tucked into my futon.

"Would you like me to stay with you?" Okami-san asks, and I am tempted to take her up on the offer. I would very much like to continue to be held and comforted, but I feel like such a nuisance just thinking of asking her to do such a thing. It wouldn't be right for me to cling to her in such a way.

"No, I'm okay. I should help you clean up." It's my job and I need to feel useful. That's probably why Hizuri-san didn't like me. She could see in me all the faults that my mother saw. She looked into my eyes and saw how stupid and useless I am. Her motherly instincts must have told her that I am not the kind of daughter she wants. I'm no good. I'll never be smart or pretty or…

"May I see your cell phone?" Taisho-san asks cutting into my thoughts. I nod, and he takes the phone off my desk, excusing himself from the room.

"Kyouko-chan," Okami-san brushes my hair out of my eyes and wipes at my tears. There is a pain in her eyes that I do not understand. Why does she look as if she's about to cry too? I inhale sharply and try to smile. I must be worrying her. She's such a kind person. "Kyouko-chan please let me know if there is anything you need. Anything at all." I nod, feeling even worse for having caused them distress.

"Can I just be alone for a little while?" I shouldn't be downstairs crying all over the dishes; in this state I would be no help to them at all.

Taisho-san brings my phone back and takes his wife out of the room with him. I bite my lip to keep myself from calling out to them. It would be rude of me to demand more of their time, but my heart squeezes with an unbearable loneliness. I shut the light off and stare at my phone. I want to call Kanae, but I wouldn't know what to say if I did. I can't exactly tell her about Kuu's wife being here. The president and Juliana told me to keep it a secret and I don't want her to hate me even more than she already seems to. If I hadn't picked a fight with Ren, I could call him. I should have called him earlier, when Yashiro-san told me to. Right now, I really need him, but I don't know if he'll be nice or if he's mad.

With a sigh, I curl up on my side and try to find sleep. The only thing that comes to me is more tears, and more questions about what I could have done differently to make Hizuri Juliana not hate me. If I can't make a beautiful, elegant and loving mother like her like me, is there ever going to be any hope that I can make my own mother like me the slightest bit? Maybe I should just accept the fact that I'll never have a mother's love.

"Sshh," Warm hands pull me close to a hard chest. They sink into my hair and rub my back. I think it must be Corn.

"I really wanted a mom." I cry, closing my eyes as I bury my face in his neck and hug him close. I didn't hear him come in, and I don't know how he knew I needed him, but I'm happy to be in his arms.

He kisses my temple and whispers softly into my ear. "I'm here now, you can cry as much as you need to." I take him up on the offer, crying until my head aches and my hands are numb from clinging too tightly to his shirt.

I move my head back to stare into warm brown eyes. "Ren, I thought Corn was here."

"I'm here. Taisho-san called me." He holds my face between his hands. "Did something happen with your mother?"

I rub my head against his hand. "No."

"No?" He kisses my nose and presses his forehead to mine. "What's wrong Kyouko?"

"I just really wanted her to be my mother. She was so elegant and perfect when I first saw her, and she was warm and nice, she even hugged me." A sob shakes through me. "When I was little, I used to try to hug my real mother, but she would slap my hands away. She used to scream at me about how stupid I was, and she was so disgusted by my existence that she couldn't stand to be touched by me." Knowing why she did it doesn't make it hurt any less. I thought that after I confronted her and learned the truth that this pain would go away. I break down again and he pulls me close.

"Oh sweetheart," His lips land on my cheeks, kissing away my tears.

"I don't know what I could have done differently to make her like me." It is unclear to me if I mean Juliana or my real mother. It seems unfair that one hates me for being born, and that the other must be thinking that I'm a wanton woman with loose morals.

"Who?"

My mouth opens before I can stop myself. "Hizuri Juliana." Ren's eyes narrow and his arms around me tense up. "I wasn't supposed to tell anyone. She and the president told me to keep it secret because her husband can't know."

For a second, he looks like he's about to become the Demon Lord, and I wonder what I did now. I must really be no good at all; I can't even keep him happy. His features soften and he's kissing my face again. I sigh, leaning into his soft caress.

"You know, Taisho-san and Okami-san were really worried about you." He says, kissing the shell of my ear. "Taisho-san hates me, but he didn't know who else to call."

"He doesn't hate you." I say, the storm in my heart lifting as I imagine the conversation that must have taken place. Ren answering my phone call, only to hear the Taisho-san's gruff voice demanding that he come fix me. I giggle at the thought.

"He doesn't like me." Ren repeats, poking my nose. "You mean so much to him that he invited a guy he doesn't like into his home, and Okami-san was anxious to find out how you were doing."

"They are the nicest employers, to worry about me like that." I should apologize to them.

"Kyouko," he sighs in my ear. "Don't be so blinded by the elegance of Julie that you miss out on what you already have."

I know what I have. "I know you love me, but I wanted a mother's love. It's different."

"I was talking about Okami-san." My brows furrow together and he flicks my forehead. "Look, I love my mother, but she wasn't exactly the mom I would have chosen for myself, or for you." Why is he talking about his mother?

"Because she couldn't cook?" I ask, not really sure where this is going but it's a nice distraction.

"Well there was that, and her constant lying." I refrain from pointing out the irony in his statement, I don't want to start a fight. "I love her, but until I was five I thought she was going to die, and she had me convinced it would be my fault." He is staring blankly at something behind me, as if he's watching a scene from his past play out. I know that face, it's a child's love for his mother clouded by the hurt of being betrayed by the one person who was supposed to protect and love him most. I used to make that face.

I kiss his nose, focusing his attention back on me, and he returns the kiss, smiling.

"She used to grasp her chest and say that being pregnant with me had made her heart weak. I did everything she told me to, because I was afraid of killing her. To this day, she'll make up an elaborate illness when she wants something, that will kill her in days or minutes, depending on how desperate she is." There are tears in his eyes, and his hands grip my shoulders. It's as if I'm his security blanket, the warm place he runs to when he needs to hide from the pain of the world.

I'm not sure how to comfort this old wound. His mother probably hadn't meant to cause any trauma, though I wonder if it is a form of abuse to manipulate someone on that level, that they would do anything for you. A mother is already someone a child wants to please, and adding the fear of death to that is too cruel.

After a moment of contemplation, Ren groans and runs his hand over his face. "I just realized that I'm a lot more like my mom than I thought. I inherited her looks and her bad personality."

"And her cooking." I try to lighten his mood.

"Hey, I can make popcorn." I can't help but smile. "Did I make you feel better at least?"

"Yes," I say, snuggling closer to him. We lay still for a while, keeping each other warm and safe.

Ren massages me scalp and asks, "Do you want to talk about last night?" I look up at him, shaking my head no. "Alright." Does he want to talk about last night?

"Ren," I close my eyes ashamed that I hurt him. He had every right to be mad at me, but he still came here when Taisho-san said I needed him. "Ren, I know you didn't hit Shoutaro, and I'm sorry if I made you feel for one second like you were competing with that jackass. And I don't think you're vi… well I know you would never hurt me." I really don't want to talk about my sleep deprived insanity. I don't want to have to think about any of that at the moment. Though we will have to eventually talk about it.

"No, I wouldn't hurt you." Kissing my neck, he leans over me and creeps up to my ear. "Go to sleep." He whispers, sending a thrill through me. "Do you want a story?" I nod, letting my eyes flutter closed as he kisses them.

"I want a true story." He grumbles something that sounds like _Of course you do,_ but I could be mistaken. "What was your fist girlfriend like?" The question popped into my head. I hadn't given much thought to his previous girlfriends before. I figure they must have been beautiful and smart.

"Why?" Ren asks, resting his head on my pillow. I wonder if he intends to sleep on top of me, and I'm curious how he manages to keep his weight from crushing me. "I don't really remember her. Meredith or Cyndie or Samantha, I don't know. They all sort of blur together."

"Seriously, you playboy, can't you even remember the first girl you had a crush on? The first time you looked at someone and went, she's cute, or something." How many girls were there that he can't recall the first? Does he even remember when he lost his…? I blush at my thoughts, thankful that it's dark in here.

"My first crush? I remember her." I feel him smile against my neck, his fingers drawing circles on my collar bone. "I was ten and she was adorable. If I close my eyes I can still see her cute little face. She was six and had dark hair that she wore in pigtails."

"You've always had a thing for younger girls then?" I ask, taking his hand to still the distracting caress of his fingers.

"Go to sleep Kyouko." he commands, chuckling against my ear.

"But you didn't tell me what happened with her. Did she like you back?" I squeak, as his tongue flicks out to lick my ear.

"No, she didn't. I wanted to be her prince, but she already had someone to fill that role. In any case, I was only here on vacation and had to go home so it wouldn't have worked out back then."

"Back home? You mean to America?" Will he be angry with me for bringing it up? No, that would be too unreasonable. He can't get mad at me for guessing. I peak one eye open, to see him staring at me with a smile on his face.

"Yes, I went back to the states and she stayed here in Japan." My heart aches for that little girl. I want him to have stayed with her and loved her all her life. But where would that leave me?

"You never saw her after that? You don't know what happened to her."

He laces his fingers with mine and rubs his thumb on the back of my hand. His other hand slips down to my stomach and slowly the warm soothing circles make my eyes grow heavy.

"She grew up and discovered that her prince was a frog. You know better than anyone how that goes." Even in my drowsy state I catch the trace of wistfulness in his voice.

"You sound almost as if you're still in love with her." I mumble, half asleep.

"I am." I think I dream his confession as I fall into unconsciousness.

"Then why aren't you with her?" I'm not certain if I say this out loud.

"I am with you." His words sound so far away, they must be a dream. "You're the only one I've ever loved, Kyouko."

The morning finds us in the kitchen cooking a basic breakfast. I heat up the miso soup from last night and make a fresh batch of rice. Ren brought a new rice cooker with him last night, even though we told him that we have more. He insisted on buying the most expensive one he could find of course, having no idea about the quality.

"Look Kyouko, no shells." I think his problem with cooking is that he gets too excited.

He's like an overactive child, skipping steps and enthusiastically adding seasoning. This man is four years my senior, but I swear he's ten years old when he shows me the bowl of beaten eggs which do not contain a single bit of shell.

"Good job," it only took him six tries, "now we need to cook them." His smile falters as he looks at the heated pan. "Were you planning on eating them raw?" I tease, adding a little salt to the eggs before he gets the chance to over season them.

"I think I'll just set the table now. I don't want to ruin anymore pans." He kisses my cheek, taking the miso, rice, and pickled vegetables with him. "This is my favorite episode," I hear him say to Okami-san. They're watching Box R, and it's embarrassing enough when they watch it alone, but hearing them watch it together makes me want to crawl in a hole and die.

There's an endless barrage of, "Isn't she just adorable?" and "Ooh look, look this is the best part."

I sigh, blocking them out to complete our breakfast before Taisho-san comes down. He wasn't too happy this morning when he and Ren bumped into each other on their way to the bathroom. I don't think he thought Ren was going to stay the whole night.

"I'm glad I made the right choice," Taisho-san announces, entering the kitchen. "I didn't know if I should have called one of your female friends or _him_."

I bow to him. "Thank you, Taisho-san. I appreciate you letting Ren stay the night."

"…" a faint blush tints his cheeks. "He didn't do anything did he? I warned him about taking advantage of you when you're vulnerable."

"He wouldn't do that." I assure him, feeling the need to convince him that I am safe with Ren.

"I know, he's a good boy." I want to laugh at Ren being called a boy so soon after I was thinking of him as a child. "And you," a large hand gently ruffles my hair. "You're a good girl, don't let anyone convince otherwise."

I finish the eggs and we join my fan club at the table. They're watching me torture a poor extra. It's a little creepy how happy they look to see me acting so violent. The television turns off, and Taisho-san sets the remote behind him before filling his plate, signaling the rest of us to do the same.

"What will you two be up to today?" Okami-san asks, placing some vegetables on Ren's plate. I stick out my tongue at him as he tries to hide his dislike for them.

"I have a meeting with the director of my new drama," Ren begins. "I'm not looking forward to filming, since the bulk of it will take me out of Tokyo for three weeks." We've been dreading this new drama, but he signed on for it months ago. There's no backing out of it now, not that he'd quit a job just to stay close to me.

"What do you mean you're not looking forward to it? I think that sounds fun." Okami-san says, but her eyes give me a look that says she knows exactly why he isn't looking forward to it.

We continue to talk about how school is going for me, and my new modeling job. Sitting like this together, I almost feel like we're a family. Maybe that's what Ren meant last night about not being blind to what I already have. The only thing that could make it more complete is if Kanae were here too. Ren catches me staring and leans down to kiss my temple.

"Not while I'm eating." Taisho-san grumbles, and I giggle at the faint smile tugging at his lips.

 **A/N: This chapter was necessary for later. Yes it was mean to do that to Kyouko but she'll be alright. Also I toyed with the idea of the Taisho-san calling Kanae but then she doesn't really seem to know how to handle a crying Kyouko, and this is a Ren/Kyouko fic. I really wish Taisho and Okami-san had names. Thanks for reading.**


	25. Want and Control

This isn't the first time I've watched her like this, but when we're at my apartment I can always escape to my gym or bathroom when I need to. Here, I have nowhere to run to. I am forced to endure her soft moans and watch her twist under the covers as her body searches for something it can't find while sleeping.

I've known that she dreams about me for a while, but I didn't want to embarrass her by bringing it up. It isn't as if I don't dream about her, but I know she'll somehow make herself out to be a bad person for fantasizing about me. I can just hear her berating herself for having wanton thoughts, and blaming herself for my wet dreams, as if she could corrupt me. As far as I'm concerned, it's a good thing for her to explore her sexuality on her own for a while, like a normal teenager.

She suppresses her emotions so much though, that I worry she'll end up torturing herself over them. I'm sure she uses that doll of me to scold herself about being lustful. It's sitting on her table, face molded into a commanding sneer. That girl has such an authority fetish. I shake my head sitting up and scooting away from her; she's squirming too much for me to sleep peacefully.

"Ren," she pants my name and I bite my lip, stopping my hand before it can reach out to her. If she gets too loud, Taisho and Okami-san might hear her.

"Taisho-san is going to kill me before I even get to do anything." I lie down on the floor, a safe distance away from her, intending to fall back asleep and continue pretending that I know nothing about her dreams.

"Ren," Kyouko fidgets in her sleep, her arms spreading out, hands searching the space I vacated for something warm. I can see her thighs press together beneath the cover, and she releases a desperate whine. Actually, I might die of frustration before Taisho-san can kill me.

Sighing, I crawl back over to her and kiss her forehead. My sleeping beauty curls her arms around me and buries her head against my neck. "You're killing me."

Hours later, I'm desperately trying not to think about stripping my girlfriend's clothes off in front of a camera. We're in a meeting room with Fujita-san discussing our next commercial. It will take place in the ballroom of a fancy hotel. I've been to so many nice hotels that it doesn't faze me, but Kyouko is positively giddy about it. She's so happy that she fails to realize that I'll be removing her fancy ballgown.

"It's one of the largest ballrooms in Japan, and the chandeliers were brought in from France." Kyouko informs us.

"Really?" Yukihito looks at the pictures of it with her, and they both have a faraway look in their eyes. One is probably picturing our wedding; the other some sort of Disney fantasy.

"How do you know so much about it?" Fujita-san asks, still ignoring my question.

"I tried getting a job there once, but they said I didn't fit their image. It would have been nice to see all the balls and banquets that go on there up close. All those pretty women in their gorgeous gowns..." I am in danger of spiriting her away to some dark corner and kissing all her insecurities away.

"Now you'll be the belle of the ball with your own gown to dance around in, and those people who thought you weren't good enough for them, will have to cater to you." Yashiro-san says mischievously. "Since we'll be staying overnight there, you could order room service and be super demanding. There's also an indoor pool, and a sauna, but you're not old enough to use it. Ooh, if you want to sneak in I could be the look out. I won't let anyone catch you doing anything naughty."

"We're going to be there for work Yukihito, not to play around." I warn sternly, wanting everyone in the room to focus on the script, so we can go back to discussing changes to make it less raunchy. "Fujita-san, you didn't seem to hear me before, why do you think it's okay to have a seventeen-year-old stripped for a commercial?"

Fujita-san sighs in annoyance, "She won't be naked, and the set will be closed for that scene. I'll have as little crew members as possible. Even Yashiro-san will be out of the room."

"What's wrong with just a ball scene?" I ask, eyeing Kyouko, who has frozen with a wide-eyed expression. "Why do I have to undress her?"

Slowly, Kyouko turns her head in my direction, before dropping it to stare down at the script. She scans though the pages, panic setting in as she reaches the part about me slowly unzipping her dress.

"I have to get naked!" I cringe, hating myself for making her feel self-conscious.

"Like Fujita-san said, it'll be a closed set. And you'll… be covered," I try to soothe her.

"You're going to undress me?" We both blush and quickly look away from each other. My eyes land on Fujita-san, who has a smug grin on her face. I glare at her, she must enjoy tormenting me.

"You'll be fine. I won't let anything happen to you." I offer what little comfort I can.

Nothing will happen to her, except that she'll be pressed against me while I remove her gown. It'll be worse than my most erotic fantasies, because it will be real, but I still won't be able to do anything. Kyouko makes a pitiful noise, and I reach out instinctively, wanting to protect her but, there are other people in this meeting. No one can think my concern is anything more than a sempai worrying about his young kohai, so I let me hand fall back to my side.

"If it were anyone else, I wouldn't dream of filming this scene, but I know she'll be safe with a _gentleman_ like you, Tsuruga-san." Fujita-san irritates me with her fake reassuring tone; she's just trying to push me far enough that I break.

"You'll be alright Mogami-san, I promise not to let anything happen to you." I declare, glaring at our director.

"There you see, everything is settled. The two of you can get changed for your photos, and then we'll go to the hotel Sunday night." She stands up, gathering her papers. "Oh, and Kyouko, don't forget what we talked about. I want to hear all about your weekend with Okami-san. That was a really thoughtful gift for a sempai, Tsuruga-san." The old pervert raises her eyebrows

suggestively. At least she's nice to Kyouko, but as far as I'm concerned, that's her only redeeming quality.

We finish up our photo shoot and head to our private waiting room. I should really request a raise for Yukihito. It seems there is no comfort he can't negotiate for us, except he didn't manage to get us out of that stripping scene. Still, that's more Fujita-san's fault than his. I need to pay the president a visit anyway; I'll sneak in a bonus for Yukihito then. The president will be in a generous mood, thanks to his mistake in introducing that heartless harpy to Kyouko.

"How did your meeting go?" Kyouko asks, twirling in front of a mirror to watch her gown fan out around her ankles. I should buy her some fancy dresses, just to watch her happily dance around in them.

"You were there weren't you? Or was that head of yours in the clouds while we were discussing me stripping you in front of a camera?" She does her best not to blush.

"The meeting for your drama!" Her hands come up to cover her beautifully flushed face and I can't help myself, striding over to her and sweeping her into my arms.

"Ren!" She giggles, wrapping her arms around my neck as I carry her over to the couch.

"That meeting?" I tickle her sides, watching the light sparkle off the tiny rhinestones that start as tight rows on the bodice of the gown and scatter out on the skirt.

"Yes, that one." She laughs, gripping my arms as I continue my assault.

"I promised them that I could be done filming in a week, so there really is no need to spend two extra weeks outside of Tokyo." She stops laughing and stares up at me, preparing to scold me. I laugh, stealing a kiss. "I'm kidding. We have to go to several different locations, and there are the other actors to consider. Even if I worked my hardest, I think I could only shave it down to one and a half weeks, but that isn't accounting for travel time." I pout. "I've never been less excited to film in my whole life. What am I supposed to do without my princess?"

"I think you'll survive. Just remember to eat." She orders, kissing my pouting lips.

"Eating isn't a problem. I'll eat three times a day and have a snack in between every meal, if it pleases you. What will kill me is a severe lack of Kyouko. I need at least five doses each day, and that isn't counting the necessary lectures about the importance of eating. You'll call me before you go to bed, won't you?" She bobs her head up and down, the slightest blush on her cheeks. "Every night, even if it's just to say goodnight."

"Yes, Ren I'll call to say goodnight, every night. And you'll text me every morning, I'm sure, but if you focus on work instead of me, you'll have a lot more fun filming." I shake my head and give her my best wounded puppy look.

"How can I focus on work when you're so far away? I need my princess, or I'll waste away to nothing. I'll always need my princess." She shakes her head at me, an amused smile playing on her lips.

"You shouldn't say things like always, Ren. What if you get sick of me or find someone better than me? If you say always, I might start to believe that we're going to be together forever."

I take her chin between my fingers and lift her face to meet mine. "I will _always_ love you." There is a world of hurt hidden behind the smile she gives me. "Your mother was a fool for leaving you, and Fuwa was an idiot who couldn't see what he had. I'm not them, Kyouko. I've loved you far too long to let you get away from me."

"You say that, yet I don't even know your real name." The words slip out, and she slaps her hands over her mouth, her eyes going wide. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said. I'm sorry." She smacks her head into my chest in her attempt to bow and beg for forgiveness. Old habits die hard, I guess.

"You're adorable," I chuckle, kissing her forehead. "I love you and I promise that I'll tell you everything. I just need some time."

Kyouko nods her head, but I can still see the uncertainty in her eyes. "Is there a reason you don't feel ready? I promise that I wouldn't tell anyone, not even Moko-san."

I almost say something about needing the president's permission, but stop myself. It's time I stopped adding to the lies, she doesn't deserve to be tricked like that.

"I know you'd keep my secret. I trust you, I just worry that," instead of finishing my sentence I lean in closer and kiss her.

What if she hates me? What if my secrets make her cry? She could act like she accepts the truth, while hiding how betrayed she feels about my deception. Eventually that pain will turn into resentment, and she'll leave me. I'm not ready to lose her, but I'll never be ready for that.

If I'm honest, there's more to my unwillingness to share my secrets. For starters, I've never said any of it out loud to anyone, and there's this part of me that's afraid speaking the words will make what happened real. Sometimes it all feels like a horrible nightmare, that I can escape by pretending it never happened. Kuon never existed, and I have always been the perfect, gentlemanly Ren. If I speak the words, and tell this girl what happened to Rick, along with all the things Kuon did, I don't think I could ever avoid my true nature again. Kuon would always be there, reminding me that I am a beast who does not deserve to hold this precious girl in my arms. I haven't been Kuon for five years, and I know I'm him but I'm also Ren, and I don't want Ren to fade away.

I want Kyouko to always see me as Ren, who can be the sort of prince she deserves - kind and loyal and patient. That is perhaps my most important reason for not telling her my secrets. Ren serves as a layer of protection for her. He'd never allow things to go too far with her. No matter how much my need for her grows, I will not touch her before I tell her everything. If she starts calling me Kuon, that barrier would crumble, and I'm afraid of losing my self-control.

"Ren?" Her cheek rests on my shoulder, and I can feel her frown. "I love you."

"I love you, princess. Please don't ever doubt that." I nuzzle her neck. "Just give me some time; I promise I'll tell you everything." How much longer will she let me get away with offering the same promise over and over?

The door to our private room opens. My arms tighten protectively around her, and I glare at the intruder. Yukihito holds his hands up to show me he has no camera.

"Alright you two, we need to get moving. Ren, you have an interview, and Kyouko, you have a photoshoot for some promotional ads for Sacred Lotus.

We go our separate ways, Kyouko with Yukihito in a company car, and me by myself. I feel lonely without them, and my interviewers aren't interested in my acting. They only want to talk about various rumors surrounding Kyouko. On one hand, I like that she's getting so much attention, and on the other, this is highly unprofessional behavior and they shouldn't be fishing for gossip like this.

"Kyouko-chan is a very nice young girl. and I assure you that she isn't interested in our manager or anyone else at the moment. She is dedicated to improving her acting skills, and I admire her for having such a level head at her age." I make sure to blush a little as I speak of her.

"Tsuruga-san, you don't expect us to believe that do you?" One of them asks, as she coyly pets my arm. I want to jerk it away from her, but instead, I pretend to find a more comfortable sitting position, allowing me to angle myself away from her. "Such a vibrant young woman is in the constant presence of two very attractive men, and you want us to believe that neither of you are the slightest bit attracted to her, or she to you. I mean, you are Japan's most wanted male celebrity, are you sure there isn't anything between you two?"

This time I don't have to pretend to blush as I let my mind wander to Kyouko flirting.

"Kyouko-chan isn't the type of girl who cares about looks or celebrity status. On top of that, we are both professionals and can control ourselves." I put emphases on the word professionals. "I consider her to be a dear friend, but I want to focus my time and energy on acting. There is no time to flirt when you're running from job to job and rushing home to get some sleep before work in the morning."

The male interviewer makes a lame joke about office romance, that manages to get a laugh out of the audience. The two speak to each other for a moment, before turning back to me to ask about my upcoming work. Finally behaving like professionals, I answer their questions politely and laugh along at the male's jokes. Once back to my dressing room, I check my phone. Yukihito called me three times, I wonder what that's about.


	26. She Loves Me

I stare at the scene playing out before me. It never occurred to me how much of a bad actress she becomes when she's desperate. Her facial expressions are overexaggerated and her arms flutter about dramatically. Apparently, she is dying right this second, on the floor of the president's office, crying about how I'm going to destroy my life again.

"Are you finished?" I ask, when she pauses to check if I'm paying attention. I can't believe I ever fell for her act. I must have been extremely innocent and trusting as a child, to hear her proclaim she was about to die and believe her every time.

"I'm dying Kuon, and you don't even care." She attempts to pout cutely, to make herself appear innocent, but nothing she does will endear her to me. I know this game too well.

"You're always dying, Julie. Come up with a new lie if you want me to care. Like the time you told me dad would leave us, if I didn't do some stupid photoshoot with you, that was a good lie." Shameful green eyes look up at me, and she slowly rises to her knees, ready to apologize. "I don't want to hear it, Julie. If you want to make me happy, then call Kyouko and tell her you're sorry. Take her to Tokyo Disney and be an overbearing but loving mother to her. If you can't do that, then leave."

"Kuon!" Her hands reach for me, but I pull myself away. "I am your mother. You can't choose that little girl over me. She's a child and she'll ruin your reputation, and possibly your career."

I have never wanted to hit a woman before, but here I am, forcing my fist to unclench as I stare down at her with disgust.

She went behind the president's back to find Kyouko again. It was cruel enough for her to reject her, but this green-eyed snake had to go insult her some more. What right did she have to interrupt my girl while she was working? Thankfully, Yukihito had been with her and firmly squashed all of the verbal abuse Julie spewed at her. I spent the night with Kotonami-san and Amamiya-san, trying to cheer up my sweet Kyouko. This morning she made us breakfast with a smile on her face, but I could see the pain in her eyes.

"You were my mother, but now you're just the bitch who broke the heart of the kindest, most loving person I know. I have forgiven you for a lot over the years, but what you did to her was cruel. Either apologize to Kyouko, or stay the hell away from both of us." Real tears fill her eyes, and I still love her enough to hate myself for hurting her, until I remember Kyouko's tears, and I get a sick sense of satisfaction.

"Kuon…"

"No, Julie. I don't want anything to do with you. I may never want to speak with you again, if you can't give Kyouko the love she deserves. You had no right to mistreat her the way you did, and I will not forgive you until she does." I won't mention that Kyouko isn't angry in the slightest; I won't say that my sweet girl blames herself for Julie's rude behavior.

Julie grabs a letter opener off the president's desk. "Just stab it into my heart Kuon. Then you can run off with your trollop."

"Stop it Julie, you're an adult! Sit down and have a grown-up conversation." I point to the couch across from me. I don't have time to listen to her tantrum, Kyouko and I have a commercial to film, and I still need to pack.

Julie drops the letter opener and saunters over to the couch. Her eye twitches, probably irritated at the thought of being scolded by her own son. She sits down, motioning for the president's weird assistant to pour her tea. I know his name is Ruto, but, thanks to Kyouko, I keep accidentally calling him Sebastian in my head. Somehow, I think he can tell.

"She's a child." Julie begins, sipping her tea and giving off the impression of a villain in a romantic drama. My mother has made herself into the clichéd, evil mother in law.

"She's legal," I shrug, feeling a little gross for saying it. Though it was Kyouko herself who pointed out that it would be legal for us to marry, I doubt she remembers it. I'm sure her mother would even consent to it, just to be rid of her. That woman and the one in front of me could learn a lot about being a mother from Okami-san. "Two years from now, five years, hell in four months, her age won't matter to anyone. No matter what country we go to, she'll be considered an adult. In any case, we're only four years apart. It's not as if I'm in my forties chasing after high school girls. I fell in love with one girl, who happens to be a little younger than I am."

Who am I trying to convince, my mother or myself? December can't come fast enough, and now that I think about it, I need to hurry up and plan her present. Maybe I could give her two roses, and she could make earrings to match princess Rosa.

"Kuon are you listening to me?" Julie asks, slamming her cup down.

"It's Ren and no, I wasn't listening to you. I was thinking about something much more important than whatever fit you're throwing."

"Even if she were eighteen, I wouldn't trust her with you. She's lives in a restaurant. Clearly, she only sees you for the rich bachelor you are. Then, there are her exceedingly plain features, and the tabloids are filled with stories about her connections to other prominent male celebrities. Since the ones I read about you were true, maybe the others are as well." I tune Julie out, thinking about Christmas and Kyouko's birthday. Is she going to throw another grateful party this year?

I could get her a whole bouquet of roses with the queen Rosa roses in the middle. I wonder if I could have them grown in a specific color. Roses come in rainbow colors, but it would probably cost more than she'd want me to spend. She is my girlfriend now, so maybe I could just buy her jewelry, or the supplies she needs to make it. She does seem to enjoy making things. I shiver at the thought of the doll version of me, sitting on the table in her bedroom. I wanted to ask her about it, but decided that she'd been through enough. Still, I wonder if she sleeps with that thing, watching her like that every night. It's a little flattering, but deeply disturbing how realistic it is.

"Kuon!" Julie whines, and I sigh, rolling my eyes as I return my attention to her. "I really am concerned. That girl is out spending your money right now, isn't she? You paid for her spa trip with that homely innkeeper."

"Kuon isn't here Julie. I'm Ren, and Kyouko is an amazing person, who doesn't care about my money or my fame. She doesn't want any of that. You on the other hand are a petty liar, and your jealousy makes you look like an ugly toad." Julie growls, but I don't give her a chance to speak. "Even if all she wanted from me was my money, I wouldn't care. As long as she agrees to be mine, I'd give her everything I have."

"And when she cheats on you, am I supposed to play the loving mother and console you?" I force my fists to unclench and stand up.

"You know absolutely nothing about that girl. I don't want to hear your reasons why I shouldn't be with her, and if you are going to continue to trash talk her, then I honestly think I might start to hate you." I admit, wishing she would just be the loving mother I know she's capable of being. She closes her mouth and looks down, openly crying now.

I've seen her like this before, and the image fills me with disgust and self-hatred. She was speechless after she found out what had happened to Rick, too. I remember how her eyes overflowed with silent tears, and she couldn't bring herself to look at me. The me who was no longer her sweet little boy, but a murderous beast.

We are silent for a moment, neither one of us wanting to be the first to fill the room with more pointless noise. I love my mother, I do, but I can't help but want to blame her for the way Kuon turned out. Had she been less overbearing, maybe he wouldn't have felt like he was suffocating. If she hadn't been so willing to make excuses every time I did something wrong, I wouldn't have thought I could get away with so much. I'm an adult, and I should take responsibility for my own actions now, but I can't help resenting her for teaching me to manipulate and lie through my teeth. How much of my bad personality was influenced by her childish need to always have things her way?

I sigh, wishing for the courage to come clean to Kyouko. I love my mother, but I don't want to be like her. She's lying to my dad right now, just by being here.

The president enters the room, clearing his throat to announce his presence.

"I hate to interrupt, but Mogami-kun called. She says that she wants to try and speak with Juliana again and would like me to set up a meeting." That girl, I shake my head, a smile tugging at my lips. She's too good.

"I have nothing to say to her." Julie crosses her arms over her chest and pouts. I roll my eyes at her. She's the worst kind of spoiled brat.

"Now Julie-san, I've told you that Mogami-kun is a lovely girl, and I think you would like her if you got to know her." Julie glares at him.

"Then go back to America and stay the hell away from her." I don't yell but I want to. I want to yell and scream and cry, begging my mother to be better.

"You're all against me." She stomps her foot and exits the office, shoving a brown wig on her head.

The president stares at me for a moment. He looks as irritated as I feel, and I can guess what he wants to ask me. _"Why didn't you tell me you were dating Kyouko?"_ I can practically hear him whine, but he won't ask. He knows that he fucked up big time by allowing Julie to come here and meet with her.

"Should we leave her running around by herself?" I break the silence. It's difficult not to hurl accusations at him, but Julie wouldn't have listened if he'd said no anyway. Still, I'd feel better if I could be mad at him instead of my mother.

"Ruto is following her. She'll spend the rest of the day trying to escape him, then she'll get tired and go back to her hotel." I wonder how she got to Kyouko the second time, if Ruto is so good at his job. The president must be able to read my thoughts as he begins to apologize. "I am sorry. Mogami-kun didn't deserve to be treated that way, and I honestly didn't know that Juliana would behave so childishly."

"She's always been that way when it comes to me and other women. Jealous and overdramatic. She'll get over it."

"And if she doesn't?" The president pulls out a cigar.

"Then we don't need her in our life." I don't need anyone around who would do that to Kyouko.

"We?" He's leaning forward on the table between us, eager to hear all the details.

"I don't intend to let Kyouko get away from me, and I won't let anyone bully her. That includes you, boss. You're not allowed to pester her for details about our relationship." He pouts, attempting to persuade me with puppy eyes. Luckily, that only works when Kyouko does it. "I need to get to work. Please don't arrange another meeting between those two without telling me first. I want to be prepared with a support group for Kyouko if she needs it. Though knowing that girl, she might give Julie a piece of her mind next time. I'd like to see that."

He pouts but nods his head. I leave him there, without any answers, knowing that my poor manager will get an earful later. I'll give him a heads up after I pick up Kyouko. Her spa day is almost over, and then we have to get to the location for our next commercial shoot.


	27. Tease

This is extremely inappropriate, and I can't believe that Kyouko is letting me do this. It's all Fujita-san's fault, forcing us to shoot this scene over and over. I can't bring myself to unzip her dress in front of all these people, doing it alone would be bad enough. At this point, I don't even care about my pride as an actor. I cannot follow the directions in the script.

"Honestly Tsuruga-san, I expected to have some trouble, but not at this level. She is wearing a swim suit underneath." Fujita-san crosses her arms over her chest. "Kyouko-chan is a professional, and everyone in the room is showing her the utmost respect, except for you."

"I don't see the point of this scene, other than your amusement at toying with us," I seethe, wishing I could wrap Kyouko in my arms to protect her from all the prying eyes in the room.

"I didn't write the scene, Tsuruga-san. The company wants this CM to be more provocative, not me. All you need to do is unzip her dress, give the fabric a push, and let Kyouko-chan take over."

I gulp, remembering the script, and how I'm supposed to submit to her fevered kisses. Her character has already been thoroughly seduced by mine, and is now eager to partake in the carnal pleasure he's offered her. At least, that's what the CM is meant to be convey.

"Let's try this again, shall we?" I nod, unwilling to admit defeat.

It really isn't as bad as I'm making it. I just have to remove the gown, to give the illusion of nudity. It's not like I haven't seen racier commercials. I'll just take off her gown, and then we'll kiss and fall onto the bed. This scene, and the ballroom scene we still have to film, will be edited together to give the impression that her perfume seduced me into her bed. It's all about selling the product, nothing more. We are on set and I am a professional. I grip the zipper, and Fujita-san barks at us to start. Nothing can happen between us in front of all these people.

My girlfriend gazes up at me, trust shining in her big, honey-colored eyes. I slip my hands beneath the gown, touching her smooth back and begin to slip the dress down. She shouldn't trust me so much. I swallow hard fighting the urge to run my hands down her back to grip her firm… I shake the thought out of my head and my fingers grip her dress, so it won't fall to the floor.

"Cut!" Fujita-san shouts at us for possibly the hundredth time. "Tsuruga-san, why is it so difficult for you to undress the girl?"

I have no answer for her, because I cannot say that I am uncomfortable undressing my girlfriend on camera, when she isn't supposed to be my girlfriend. It may be something our director alludes to, but it can't be something I confirm by acting overprotective. I can't say that I'm afraid I might push her down on the bed and ravish her in front of everyone. I can't admit that my already tenuous self-control might just crumble tonight. I need to take a few deep breaths to clear my head and gain some control over my emotions.

"She has a bikini underneath; how many times do I have to tell you that?" A flesh toned, strapless bikini isn't going to make the situation any better. I've already explained that to Fujita-san, but she scoffed at me and told me to deal with my frustrations later.

"She's seventeen." That is the only defense I have, and it irritates me to recall my mother saying she was a child. I'm doing the same thing, aren't I?

"If she were any other actress we would have been done filming two hours ago," Fujita-san sighs with annoyance. "You know what, we'll come back to it. Let's do the ballroom scenes first, then we can all sleep on it and come back to this scene in the morning. We're lucky I figured on one of you love fools giving me trouble and planned ahead." She glares at my hands zipping up Kyouko's gown. "We'll break for dinner, then meet in the ballroom."

I release a breath I hadn't realized I'd been holding, relieved to have put the scene off. Maybe if it continues to be an issue, she'll drop it all together. I cringe at my own unprofessionalism. Fujita-san was right, any other actress and I would have had no problem completing the scene. A scene like this means nothing to me, until it involves Kyouko.

"Tsuruga-san?" Kyouko catches the lapel of my suit jacket, drawing my attention to her face. Until now, I've been staring at the dress in horror, not even seeing the beautiful body it conceals.

"Yes, Mogami-san?" There are still crew members around, so we have to maintain formality. It's not worth the risk of someone spreading rumors.

"Maybe it would help if we practiced the scene." My heart stops. What is this girl saying?

"Yes! Brilliant idea, Kyouko-chan." Fujita-san excitedly cuts off my reply. "New plan! We'll film the ballroom scene now, then the two of you will go to your room and practice until morning. Tomorrow you'll be able to complete the scene no problem." The pushy director shoves me hastily out of the room. Why is this woman so obsessed with our sex life? It makes me wonder if she's friends with our lovemon president. "Stop glowering at me Tsuruga-san."

"It'll be alright, Ren. We can get through this scene together. We're professionals." She trusts me way too much.

I should put an end to this, demand the scene be changed or taken out completely. However, Yashiro pointed out to me the other day that she will be getting more adult roles eventually. He's already turned down several offers because of her schedule. It's better if her first time is with me instead of some stranger. Of course, the thought puts images in my head, even if that isn't what I meant. We won't go off script, I reprimand myself, as we are lead to our places on opposite ends of the large ballroom. I don't know why this CM needs a bedroom scene when it has a grand ballroom scene. Fujita-san claims she had nothing to do with it, but I find it really hard to believe her.

"Alright, everything is set up. It's a very simple scene Tsuruga," Fujita-san shoots me a pointed look. "Kyouko-chan." She coos at Kyouko like a doting older sister. "All you have to do is use your eyes to seduce your _non-boyfriend_. Then he'll stride over to you, enthralled, and the two of you will dance. Remember, Kyouko has to lead this time, the only show of dominance Tsuruga-san will display is removing the dress." She stresses the last line to really drive home that I still have to do the scene.

Kyouko doesn't have to do much to seduce me. She is standing in a ballroom surrounded by pretty girls in glamorous dresses, but she's the only one my eyes care to see. There are three people close to her, that she pretends to converse with, as her eyes drift to mine. They seem to beckon me to her, promising mischief and pleasure. I excuse myself from the group I am meant to be friends with, and walk over to ask her to dance. She almost falters, I can see the giddiness lying just beneath the surface of her seductive mask. She's enjoying the fantasy of the ball, beyond her character. My princess is probably imagining that I am the prince and she is Cinderella, whose only dream was to have a night off from her life of chores. I smile and lean my forehead against hers, as I let her lead me in our dance.

Julie was a fool to not fall in love the instant she laid eyes on this girl.

"You look rather regal in blue." I am mindful of the cameras, as I whisper in her ear. "Regal and elegantly sexy. I think everyone here must be envious of me getting to dance with the only angel at the party." To her credit she doesn't blush. She continues to dance me around the floor, her lips coming up to graze my jaw to tempt me. I fall for it, moving closer, but she turns her head, coyly avoiding the kiss. Playing with her like this, I could forget all about filming and just dance forever with her.

"Those girls in my friend group were gushing about how handsome you are." She brings a hand to my chin forcing me to bend down a bit closer to her. "They wondered if you would sneak into the pool with them tonight."

"Oh? And you didn't claw their eyes out? I have to say I'm disappointed." I mock being wounded. "At least pretend to be jealous."

"Why would I be jealous? I know where you'll be tonight." I can feel my face flush. Sometimes I wonder if she wants me to act on my urges. She certainly teases me enough. "Sempai, kiss me."

I willingly obey her command. Swooping down to capture her lips only, for her to pull away from me completely.

"Cut!" Fujita-san yells, then she turns to the cameraman, so they can inspect what we filmed more closely. "Good… Yes…" The cameraman isn't speaking loud enough for me to hear, but the director practically shouts her approval. "We'll use that! I know, look at his face!"

"Tsuruga-san, would you mind if we danced some more?" Kyouko peeks up at me through her lashes.

I bow to her and offer my hand. They'll watch that scene at least three times more, before Fujita-san returns to ordering us around, and I can let Kyouko play out her fantasies until then. The other ball attendees follow our lead and continue to dance. It's much livelier than when we were filming, with the background actors chatting enthusiastically as they admire the splendor of the room. It speaks to my upbringing as a spoiled rich boy, that I barely noticed the opulence around me. I've been in bigger rooms with gaudier decorations. Seeing the delight on Kyouko's face forces me to examine everything, from the marble pillars to the exquisite chandelier, more closely. The way her eyes sparkle in the light makes me wish even more that I could be the prince she deserves.

"It's late." Fujita-san says, looking down at her watch. Kyouko sighs and leans against my chest. We've been reshooting the scene to get the best angle for hours now, and her feet must be throbbing. "We'll stop for supper and resume the ballroom scene first thing after breakfast. You two can take supper in Tsuruga-san's room so you can practice for tomorrow. We only have until eight tomorrow night to film this, and there's no room in the budget to delay. Be a professional Tsuruga, and film the scene as it's written."

Fujita-san dismisses everyone and Kyouko lifts herself off me.

"Are you alright?" She asks, placing a careful distance between us as extras and crew members wish us a goodnight as they pass by.

"I'm the one causing issues and you're asking me if I'm alright?" I shake my head, fighting the urge to wrap her in my arms. She's too cute.

"That's why I'm asking if you're alright. It isn't like you to have so much difficulty completing a scene, and I know you tend to beat yourself up when it comes to acting. It wasn't fair of Fujita-san to call you unprofessional."

"I'm not concerned with what she thinks of me. Come on, let's go get you something to eat." I start walking, expecting her to follow. "Mogami-san?" I ask, when I notice that she isn't moving.

"We should practice the scene." She says firmly.

"Ok, let's eat first." She glowers at me, knowing me too well to believe I actually want to eat. Of course Fujita-san was _nice_ enough to book adjoining rooms for us, and I'm terrified of going back there alone with her. Everyone else from the crew is separated from us by an entire floor.

"Sure, we'll eat first. Then you'll say you want dessert, and after that you'll need to shower and get ready for bed. And since you're ready for bed, you'll be too tired to practice. We can't remain stuck on this scene Tsuruga-san." How can this girl know me so well, yet still think having me undress her in private would be a good idea?

"It's late Kyouko, I don't want to fight with you about this. We don't need to practice the scene because we're not going to film the scene. It's just a ploy for Fujita-san to mess with us. The old pervert just wants to watch us make out."

"Tsuruga-san don't use my name so informally…"

"Why, it's not like we're fooling anyone?" I turn to a group of extras. "Are we fooling you?" They shake their heads no, a couple of the women blushing. "Right and do you care about that?"

"Not at all." A younger boy says. "I'm a fan of both of you and I think it's cute."

"Kyouko-chan is such a lovely girl; I think it would be strange for Tsuruga-san not to like her." An older woman says smiling at Kyouko. "Thank you for the help the other day."

"Oh, you're welcome Hina-san." I stop Kyouko before she can fully bow.

"See, only Fujita-san cares," I affirm, taking her hand and bidding the group goodnight.

"But your fans care." Kyouko yanks her hand away, glaring at me with watering eyes. I don't want to fight with her, especially not in front of strangers.

"I'm sorry. Let's go eat okay; I promise that we'll work on the scene after that." She must have the wrong idea, like I don't want to do the scene because I have a problem with her body. Even if I told her the opposite is true, she wouldn't believe me. "I wouldn't break a promise to you, you know that."

Finally, she nods, bidding our audience goodnight.

 **A/N: It's been a while, sorry the chapter isn't longer. I started to write a chapter about the spa day actually but it was too sappy and sweet, it was embarrassing. Okami-san and Kyouko had a nice day together bonding and I couldn't stand it. I need angst and drama and smut. I still might finish that and add it as an extra but it isn't my top priority at the moment. Sorry.**


	28. Hush Now Baby

This is extremely inappropriate, and I can't believe I'm letting him do it. No, worse than agree to this, I suggested it. I asked my boyfriend to undress me. What kind of wanton woman does that? His hands shake as he touches the smooth fabric of the gown. I can't help but feel a bit excited at the thought of him removing my clothes.

He inhales deeply, gripping the tiny metal zipper on my back.

"I can't do this." He says, removing his hands.

I cross my arms. He doesn't have to look so sick about having to practice. We wouldn't have to do this if he'd been able to complete the scene for the CM. Not that I wanted to have an audience my first time. My cheeks grow hot. I didn't mean it like that! We're not doing _that!_ This is just practice for the scene. Practice, Kyouko! It isn't something he would willingly do. He can't even bring himself to do it for work.

Though, I'm actually relieved he couldn't do it. After he removes my dress I'm supposed to dominate him, and I haven't the first clue how to do that.

"You promised that we would rehearse this."

"We don't need to rehearse it. The scene is unnecessary, and I don't want to do it." Why is he fighting this so much? It's not as if he's never seen me in a bikini. Or is it that he thinks I can't do it? I'll make him rehearse the scene. "Stop thinking whatever negative thoughts you're thinking." He says lifting my face to look at him. "And don't make that face."

"What face?" I avert my eyes from his, afraid that he can read my thoughts.

"Kyouko," he sighs, hugging me and pressing his forehead to mine. "Do you honestly want to film this scene?"

I don't. Well maybe there is a small part of me that does. "I want to prove that I can do it." I can do this scene without letting my inexperience get in the way. I did the other commercials didn't I?

"You don't need to prove anything to anyone. I know you're a brilliant actress and perfectly capable of seducing me." He kisses my cheek and draws me closer.

"I want to prove it to myself," I admit, though I am determined to lead him in an act too. He looks as though he's about to refuse me again. I pout and say, "Please Ren. I need to do this to help myself grow as an actress."

He strokes my cheek with the back of his hand. "Damn it Kyouko, are you trying to kill me?" I glimpse the emperor in his smile, but he holds himself back. "I can't practice this with you in private. It's hard enough for me to keep my hands off you when you're fully clothed."

My heart skips, but I find it difficult to fully believe him. Love doesn't suddenly make someone have sex appeal. I clench my jaw, irritated at my own insecurity. No matter what I do there's still a voice in my head telling me I am plain and boring. My body will never measure up to the supermodels Ren must be used to.

"Kyouko?" Gentle fingers smooth the scowl from my face.

"Sorry, I'm just a little frustrated." Sometimes in my dreams Ren loses all his self-control and does things to my body that make me forget how unattractive I am. In reality he couldn't remove my dress even when the script called for it.

"You are a phenomenal actress." Slow and gentle, he presses his lips to mine. "You're beautiful." Another lingering kiss clouds my mind. "And sexy." A tender smile plays on his lips as he cradles my face in his hands. "I wish you would believe me when I say that."

"You're a playboy and a liar. It's impossible to believe a word you say since I know you have an ulterior motive." I turn away from him, my cheeks burning. I know what he's doing. He's playing with my head again, trying to make me forget about the scene.

"What motive?"

"The scene, Ren. You don't want to practice." It irks me that he of all people would avoid work just because it's a little uncomfortable. Doesn't he know that I need to practice this more than he does? I need to mentally prepare myself for being undressed and being the aggressor.

"I told you, there's no need to practice. We won't be filming the scene." This conversation is going in circles.

"If you would just get over removing my dress, we could film the scene in one take and be done with it." I sigh, agitated by his refusal. Fujita-san isn't backing down on this scene.

"Get over it? How the hell do you expect me to do that?" I wince, feeling his arms tighten too much around me. "I would like nothing more than to rip this dress off you and throw you down on this bed. I'd love to ravish your body and have you screaming my name all night." He inhales sharply, loosening his grip. " _My_ name." The words seem to be a spell that calms him.

I'm left disappointed again. He says he wants to do those kinds of wanton things with me, but he's always the one who stops us. How am I supposed to believe he finds me sexually appealing when all he has are words? The most frustrating thing is I don't even know if I want him to act on those words. What if he brings my fantasies to life but I fail to fulfill his?

"You promised." I blink back involuntary tears. Does _he_ think I won't live up to his desires?

"Oh, fuck me."

"What!"

I am crushed to him in a hard kiss. His hands glide smoothly up my back to the zipper. Wait! I'm not ready. The zipper makes a sound of protest as he slowly pulls it down and I whimper into his mouth. I can't help the shiver that courses through me as the dress loosens around my breast. His hands are the only reason the dress is staying up and as they travel down to my hips the gown also slips down slowly. Why had I wanted this again? The silk tickles my skin as it glides over my stomach. His hands are touching me through the fabric. Heating me up despite the rush of cool air hitting my naked flesh.

Rough hands grip my bare thighs and I am hoisted up. Instinctively my legs wrap around his waist. He grunts falling back onto the bed. With a hand in my hair he holds my head in place as he ravishes my mouth.

I hear a nervous shudder above me and break out of my fantasy. After a brief stretch of silence, I dare to peak up at him. Ren has his eyes closed and his cheeks are a cute shade of red. When had reality meshed with my fantasy? I cringe, realizing that I am indeed alone with Ren and he just took my dress off, but we're still just standing near the bed, not making out on it. Still, there is nothing covering me except a bikini that is so close to my skin color I would appear naked to anyone who walked in. But who would walk in on us? After escorting us to Ren's room, Yashiro-san said he would leave us alone for a while and the rest of the crew is having a late supper. We could do anything, and no one would know.

My heart pounds so loud I can barely hear myself think. What should I do now?

According to the script I'm supposed to kiss him. I should grip the jacket of his tux and yank his mouth down to mine. Then I have to shove him down on the bed and climb over him.

"This was a bad idea." Ren's husky whisper draws my attention to his eyes. Now open and trailing down my body.

I know he must find my body lacking in sex appeal. Who wouldn't? _Shut up!_ I scream at the voice in my head as I grip his jacket and pull him down to me. Caught off guard, Ren stumbles forward and we nearly fall to the floor. He surrenders easily parting his lips for my tongue to explore his mouth. I press myself against him and sink my hands beneath his jacket slowly pushing it off his shoulders. He lets me guide the fabric off his arms and I expect to wake up at any moment. I drop the jacket to the floor, waiting for the illusion to fade. My lips still against his and I withdraw my tongue from his mouth. Lust clouded eyes glare down at me. Our breath mingles in the space between us and for the life of me I can't figure out why my daydream isn't being interrupted. Has Ren simply grown used to my tendency to escape into fantasy? Oh god he doesn't know what I fantasize about does he? I need to wake up now!

A hand sinks into my hair catching me off guard, and I squeak in surprise as lips crash into mine. He squeezes me close to him, lifting me off the floor. I surrender to his assault not knowing what else to do, and fearing I'd finally broken his restraint. I hear a low almost anguished moan as my breasts press into his chest with only the thin dress shirt and swim top separating my hardening nipples from his smooth skin. The tiny pebbles pressing into him is altogether embarrassing and arousing, sending shocks of pleasure to the pit of my stomach and below.

There are no cameras and no best friends to interrupt us. It also seems like the gentleman Tsuruga Ren has left this body and only the emperor remains. This fantasy isn't likely to end any time soon, so I might as well enjoy it. Throwing caution to the wind, I let my hands travel between us to unbutton his shirt. One by one the buttons reveal his smooth, warm skin until my hands collide with the top of his pants. The shirt is tucked in tight and I hesitate.

I should feel embarrassed because I am no longer so sure that this is a fantasy. I couldn't possibly imagine the way it feels for hard nipples to rub against a smooth naked chest. I've never felt that before, I'm not even sure my nipples have ever been hard before. Then again Ren wouldn't let things get this far, especially not with me barely dressed as I am. If this is real than I am sure any minute now he will flick my forehead and tell me to behave myself. Challenging myself, I drop my fingers to the button on his pants. This is when Ren would realize what we're doing and stop us from going further. It irritates me when he stops us, though I am not sure if I want to keep going.

I think it might be good if he stopped me now. The hand in my hair grips my head tighter and angles me up more to gain better access to my mouth. The button snaps open and I daringly dip my fingers into his waistband to grip the hem of his shirt. Ren groans and I can feel something long and hard twitch near my hand. Without breaking our kiss, he throws us onto the bed, seizing both of my hands in one of his to pin above my head.

His other hand grips my butt and though it scares me I do not protest. Instead of attempting to stop him as my brain screams at me to do, I lift a leg up to wrap around his waist. He groans approvingly and bites my lip as his groin thrusts against my core. Panting, he ends our kiss to allow both of us a moment to breath. I cannot catch my breath though, not with that hard-throbbing length rubbing against my center.

If this really isn't a dream, I expect him to stop this now. He will chuckle against my lips and nuzzle my nose. Normally he would say something cute and exhaustingly romantic, before announcing that he's going to get ready for bed.

His hand releases mine and nimble fingers slide down my body to my thighs. I gasp as he grips my thighs and spreads them wider to accommodate his hips. I open my eyes to stare into his. My breath hitches at the sight of the emperor, hungry and in full control of my boyfriend.

"You're failing." He whispers wickedly, as his hips grind downward, eliciting a moan from me.

"What?" My voice is breathy, and I buck my hips up against the appendage that is practically begging to be released.

"You're supposed to be the dominant one." He says with a grin, before capturing my lips again in a demanding kiss.

Is that a challenge? I shove his shirt off him and drag my nails down his back. There is nothing in my brain besides how good this feels and winning. I have to prove that I can do this scene; that I can take control and force him to submit to me. Gripping his shoulders, I shove him down to the mattress and straddle him. He looks amused by my show of dominance. That pisses me off. I dive down capturing his bottom lip with my teeth and eliciting a long groan as his hips buck.

"Careful princess, you don't want to wake the beast." He hisses into my ear.

"You started it." I accuse, but then I recall that I had kissed him.

He smirks up at me then with a swift move of his hands he seizes my wrists and holds my lips prisoner again. Even on top I can't control him. I growl into the kiss, wondering how to get my boyfriend to submit. How can I overpower someone so big? He releases my wrists with a chuckle and grips my thighs.

He leaves my lips, making a trail of hot kisses down my neck to the swell of my barely covered breast. I feel the fabric of the bikini top being pushed down by eager lips. His hands on my thighs tighten the closer he gets to one of my oversensitive nipples. I'm losing, and I don't even care.

"Ren!" I pant, clawing at him.

Cold air rushes over me, and I find myself very unexpectedly alone on the bed. I sit up, tears springing to my eyes as I wonder what I did to disappoint him. His back is to me, and I can see pink marks trailing down to where his pants hang low on his hips. I look at my nails feeling guilty for hurting him. I hadn't meant to hurt him.

"I'm sorry." I murmur weakly as I sit up and gently touch the scratches. He stiffens at my touch and I recoil.

"No, I'm sorry." He says after taking deep, calming breaths. " _That,_ shouldn't have happened. _I_ should never have let things get that far."

"Oh." I look down, understanding now. He must have realized how inadequate I am. I showed my inexperience and he is disgusted with himself for touching someone so immature.

"Oh?" A hand comes up to cradle my face, but I flinch away not wanting him to see the tears that have welled up in my eyes. It's frustrating how easily this man can manipulate my emotions. "I am sorry, Kyouko."

I look up immediately at the sound of that helpless voice. He's staring down at his hands in disgust. I know that look in his eyes. It's the one that screams, _I'm a monster! A beast! Don't love me._

"Ren?" He flinches, and I can't help but wonder if he has a problem being called that. It isn't my fault he won't tell me his real name.

What should I do now? I look down and to my horror I find myself disheveled in the worst possible way. The bikini top is hanging low nearly revealing my breasts to him. My bottoms are uncomfortably wet. I squirm, embarrassed to admit that I miss the feeling of our bodies rubbing together.

"I should control myself better." He falls to his knees, still staring at his shaking hands. "I shouldn't have touched you like that."

I take his hands in mine and try to pull him up. He refuses to budge. How did we go from doing embarrassing but pleasurable things to crying on the floor in self-loathing? This is all too much, and I've had enough of running around in circles with him.

"Why do you fight this so much? Is it because if my age or my body? Is there some other reason?" The words make me nauseous with anticipation. I don't know what I'm expecting to happen, but I'm afraid it could change our relationship forever.

"I'm just not ready." He tries to avoid my question, trying to pull his hands from mine.

"Tell me." I demand, sounding more in control than I am. What if he says that I'm just not good enough? That not even his love for me can enable him to look past my plain face and flat body. My grip on his hands becomes tighter.

"I'm not ready… to have…" he blushes, stumbling over his words. "With you."

"Because I'm too plain?" But I felt his reaction. Can that happen to a man even if he doesn't find his partner attractive. "You're used to models who fill out their bikinis."

"Plain? Kyouko you do realize that you would be considered a model, right? You were sought out for this job by someone whose job it is to select the most attractive person who suits the brand." That's only because I'm a good actress and I'm only good because I was taught by him and LME. "We're back to this again." He sighs, and then he does something that I think shocks both of us. "This wouldn't happen if I didn't find you irresistibly sexy." I am frozen by the feeling of his manhood beneath my hand, still pulsing from before. He sets my hand over him then moves his away allowing me to do as I wish.

"This…?" I caress him, eliciting a moan. "Does it feel good?"

"Yes." Ren purrs and slumps forward, nuzzling my belly. "Fuck Kyouko, you're too damn tempting. That's the problem."

"Why? If you want me and I'm willing, why is that a problem?" He takes my hand away from him and brings it to his lips.

"You're willing to lose your virginity? Right here? Right now? To a man who you barely know?"

"I know you." It hurts that he would accuse me of not knowing him.

"What's my name?" I almost call him Ren but that would just prove to him that he's right. "Is February tenth my real birthday? What city was I born in? What state? What are my parents' names, and where do they live?"

"That isn't fair. You're the one who refuses to talk about any of that." Why is he picking a fight?

"Because I'm not ready!"

"Why! It isn't your first time. You know what you're doing, and you'll be good at it. I'll be the one fumbling around like an idiot, hoping you won't laugh at me or realize you made a mistake dating me." Ren sighs and I can feel tears running down my stomach.

"You deserve so much more than me, Kyouko." I cradle his head against me and cry silently with him. We remain that way for what feels like hours. My legs start to twitch, unused to being stagnant for so long. I hug him tighter to myself, refusing to move until he does.

Hot air blows against me and I look down to see a lost little boy staring up at me. His mouth opens and closes, as though he is speaking but can't bear to put sound to his words. I lean down and kiss his forehead.

"You are everything I want."

 **A/N: So that happened.**


	29. Bittersweet Sacrifice

I can't believe we almost had sex. What the hell was I thinking! I can't believe he almost didn't stop. My head hits the headboard and I remember that I'm still in the presence of the man who wasn't going to stop. He really was going to keep going if I hadn't said the wrong name. I glare down at him and he smiles sweetly.

"Morning." He says, lifting his head from my chest. Creeping up my body, he leaves a trail of tender kisses all the way to my lips.

"Don't think that I've forgiven you." I say into his kiss.

"For what?" I'm not really sure why, but I know I'm upset. Either because he stopped or because he wasn't going to, or because he still doesn't trust me enough to tell me his name.

"Everything." I decide as I sit up, shoving him off me.

A low chuckle vibrates against my back as he pulls me to him. He plants a kiss on my forehead and whispers, "Thank you."

"For what?" I am aware that I've fallen into his trap again, but I can't bring myself to mind it too much. Slowly he's revealing his past to me, and I can see that even this pace is difficult for him.

"Everything." We sit for a few moments in peaceful silence. Ren presses his nose to my neck and breathes deeply, releasing a contented hum. I lean into him, sighing and wishing we could prolong this moment.

Eventually we have to get up though and start our torturous day of shooting. Fujita-san questions me about needing a new bikini bottom but I can't bring myself to tell her why. She's no doubt come to her own conclusions, but no matter how much I want to set her straight, that conversation would be too embarrassing.

"Places you two!" She shouts at us as we prepare to film the scene again. "This should be a piece of cake now that you've _practiced_."

"Ready?" Ren whispers, and I'm not sure if it's a question for me or himself. I nod anyway and place my hands on his shoulders.

We've already gone over the ballroom scene again. Filming things that Fujita-san wanted a different angle for. This is all we have left to do, and I want to get it over with. My only hope is that we don't lose control of ourselves on camera.

"Ready?" Fujita-san asks with a hint of amusement in her voice. "Start!"

Releasing a slow breath Ren eases the zipper down my back. Our noses brush as the gown slips down my body. He lures me into a slow, gentle kiss and we stay like that long enough to hear Fujita-san's exasperated sigh. Before she can yell cut I grip his tie, pulling him closer and transforming our kiss into a battle for dominance. I take his bottom lip between mine and bite down softly. He growls, hugging me tighter against his hard body. Thankfully, Ren doesn't play any of his games and submits easily. I give him a weak shove and he falls back onto the bed. I climb over him, flashing him a wicked smile before yanking him up by his tie for another kiss.

I waste no time divesting him of his suit jacket but take my time with his shirt. It drives him crazy as I trail my lips down his jaw to his neck. I can feel how much he enjoys it as I lay a kiss against the flesh beneath every button I undo. It occurs to me that I have to leave his shirt on to avoid questions about the marks on his back. I fight the blush warming my face at the thought of other people seeing what I've done. Once I have him unbuttoned, I kiss my way back up, but deny him when he tries to kiss me. He reaches for my face, to pull my lips to his, but I clamp my hands around his wrists and hold them down. I know if he wanted to, he could reverse our positions and overpower me in a heartbeat. Instead he pouts up at me, begging for a kiss. I guide his hands to my hips before taking hold of his face and forcing his lips to meet mine.

"Cut!" I freeze in the middle of sucking on his bottom lip. "Did you forget about us?" Fujita-san hits me in the head with a rolled-up script.

"No." I say too quickly and Fujita-san laughs. If I had truly forgotten though, I would have had his shirt off already.

"Liar. That was fine, let's get some different angles now." I groan and drop my head to Ren's chest. This woman really is too cruel.

"Cut!" Finally, my sore lips can rest. Making out for the camera isn't as fun as when we do it in private. There are too many logistics and Fujita-san never stops with her crude remarks. "I've arranged a little after party in the ballroom. Now that these two have finally managed to produce a good scene, let's go celebrate a little. Kyouko-chan, can I speak with you for a moment?"

I nod, hopping off the bed and collecting my gown to cover myself. I leave Ren alone to pout about me being able to escape so easily. He says he needs a minute before he can feel comfortable standing up. Fujita-san leads me away from the rest of the crew before turning to me with a wicked glint in her eyes.

"So how was last night? Was he gentle with you?" Despite expecting her questions, I let out a small scandalized gasp.

"I have no clue what you mean. Last night we practiced our scene and went to our own beds early. As it turns out, all we needed was a good night's rest." Fujita-san purses her lips. "I'm telling the truth."

"Fine, don't tell me. I hope you talk to someone about it though. He was good to you, right? I like you and I think you deserve his best." She hands me another folder like the one that had been filled with dirty pictures. I had managed to ditch in the spa garbage. Though I was racked with nervous guilt it had to be done. "It's important that you know these things. I never had anyone to teach me, and the result of that wasn't," she stares behind me as if seeing something there. "Anyway, that won't happen to you. Go find your not boyfriend and have some fun before you have to leave for your next job."

I want to ask if she's okay, but she shushes me and pushes me away. With the folder in hand I trudge back to Ren. How will I get rid of this one now?

"What's that?" Ren points at the folder.

I don't want to answer. "Why do you need a minute before? You still had clothes on, it isn't as if anyone would have seen anything." I fight the blush that my own question brings up. I know exactly why he needed to stay seated, but I need to change the subject.

"We have some time before either of us has to be anywhere. Would you like to attend the party for a bit?" Ren sidesteps my question and I let it go, relieved that he has forgotten about the folder.

"Yes, just let me go change." What I really want to do is find a place to stash the folder.

Maybe I could sneak it into the trash in my room. I couldn't throw it away in Ren's room because he'd find it. Would Fujita-san somehow find out if I threw it away in my room though? In the end, I hide the folder in my suitcase. I spend the first half hour at the party fretting over made up scenarios of Ren finding it, until Yashiro-san informs us that he has packed everything in the car. I realize it isn't Ren I'll have to worry about. Yashiro-san is too efficient to let his stars handle the luggage. I spend the rest of the party and our return trip to LME thinking up excuses as to why I have to take my suitcase with me. I can think of nothing and I panic as Ren escorts me to the Love Me section.

"Wait my suitcase!" Ren scowls in confusion.

"Did you forget something in it?" I bite my tongue before I can blurt out that I need the folder out of it. That would only make him ask about it again. "I can go grab whatever you need."

"No!" I grip his arm and draw several gazes with my scream. I'm pretty sure most LME employees know about us, but I let go and put some distance between us just in case. "I can get it later, just have Yashiro-san-san leave the suitcase in the car."

"I'm sure he'd be happy to bring you what you need out of it later." I shake my head making an effort to smile calmly.

"I'd prefer to grab it myself. It's kind of personal." Think of something to say. Think! "It has to do with feminine hygiene. Please don't let Yashiro-san go in my suitcase."

"Alright." To his credit he doesn't seem embarrassed by my lie. I always thought that men were disgusted by the mere mention of feminine hygiene products. Ren continues walking me to the Love Me room then immediately pulls me into a hug once we're alone. "I'll miss you." He says kissing my forehead.

"We'll see each other tonight. Unless you want to be alone to pack." He holds me tighter, shaking his head no.

"I leave tomorrow, and I won't be able to see you before that because you have work. Doesn't it make you sad that we won't be able to say goodbye at the airport?" I shrug, causing his pout to deepen. "You can be so cruel sometimes. Won't you miss me?"

"Yes, but we can say goodbye in the morning. Besides we wouldn't be able to say goodbye at the airport even if I wasn't working." Has he forgotten that his fans know nothing about us and if they found out I would be hunted down by them?

"True, I'd never be able to leave if you were there." To emphasize his point, he pulls me into a kiss, running his hands slowly down my back to my hips. He squeezes my hips, groaning as he pulls them closer to his.

"Stop that right now!" My blood runs cold as I am wrenched away from Ren and thrown down. The cold, green eyes of Hizuri Juliana meet mine. "How could my husband have been so wrong about you? Doing such disgusting things in this filthy little room, you're despicable!"

"Hey, don't talk to my girlfriend like that." Ren rushes to me and lifts me off the floor. "Are you alright?" He asks, inspecting my face for any sign of harm.

"And you, what kind of man are you? Touching this ugly little girl in this godawful locker room." I growl, how dare she speak to Ren with such disrespect? "You really are a horrible man. I am appalled by your behavior, Ren." The way she says his name with such familiarity causes my jaw to clench. "Here I was ready to have a heart to heart with Kyouko, only to find you mauling her. You are a lewd little boy and I am ashamed of you."

Curiously, Ren's face contorts in pain. He faces away from her and stares distantly over my head. I've seen him cry before and ready to shatter, and this woman's words seem to be sending him to his dark place. I worry that if she continues with her verbal abuse, I won't be able to pull him out of it this time. I touch his cheek but get no response.

"Can't you see how wrong this relationship is? Forget about the age difference," Juliana waves her hand flippantly. "Think about what you did." Ren flinches as if she slapped him. "Think about what you're doing now. Corrupting that girl with your filthy sou…" a loud smacking sound echoes through the room, and I am left staring down at my own hand in disbelief.

Juliana falls back in shock and lands with a loud grunt on the floor. She stares up at me, holding her red cheek. I hit father's wife! I can't believe I did that. What were you thinking Kyouko? I'm going to be in so much trouble. I panic for a moment, but then I clench my teeth and point a finger at the gorgeous woman.

"Don't you ever speak to him like that again." I force my voice to sound confident and threatening. "You have no right to talk down to him in such a way or try to convince him to leave me." I crouch down and lean closer to her. "He. Is. Mine."

There's a strange look in her eyes. She almost seems impressed by my actions, but then she scowls.

"Really? Why don't you ask your beloved murderer about my son? I bet he's never mentioned that." She stands in one fluid motion, collecting her dignity. "Yours," she laughs mockingly. "You don't know the first thing about that murderer."

I turn to ask Ren what she means, only to find him sitting on the floor frozen. Was Kuon the friend whose death Ren blames himself for?

"Ren!" I reach out to hold him and find that his skin is cold. "You need to leave." I say to Juliana and pay her no more mind. I am too busy lifting my boyfriend off the floor to care if she obeys my words or not. I call for Yashiro-san. When he arrives, he scrunches his brows together looking behind me but says nothing about Juliana as he helps me get Ren to the car.

 **A/N: About Juliana and my spelling of her name. I took four years of Russian and from what I remember Juliana would be the correct spelling when translating from Russian to English. It could be different when going from Russian to Japanese to English but I prefer Juliana anyway. I am having some issues in real life right now and the next chapter might be a bit depressing, but it will be necessary.**


	30. In Your Room

"Ren, is it because of what happened to your friend? Ren?" Warmth envelops me, and I open my eyes to see the sweetest face marred by concern. "Tell me what happened."

I reach up to wipe the tears from her eyes. How long have I been out? I release my breath, trying to conjure the courage to speak. I close my eyes and see my mother's face. My overbearing mother, who loved me to the point of suffocation, couldn't even stand to look at me. If I tell Kyouko will she turn away from me too?

"What time is it?" I ask, trying to escape her imploring eyes. If I stare into them too long, I'll tell her everything. I make an attempt to get up from the bed, which I don't recall getting into. How had she gotten me into my pajamas?

"Ren." Her hands cup my face and she pushes me down. I'm startled by her sudden weight on my chest as she straddles me, forcing my eyes to meet hers. "Tell me."

I inhale deeply and curl up to hug her close and breathe in her sweet scent. I knew this moment would come eventually, but I still can't help cursing Julie for forcing it prematurely.

"Can I give you something first?" I ask, eyeing the top drawer of my nightstand.

She pushes lightly on my arms, backing away from me. "No, I don't want any more gifts, and no sweettalking your way out of telling me either."

"I'll tell you." My voice quivers as I promise to reveal all of my darkest secrets to her.

"You won't try to trick me or distract me?" She asks, inching closer. "You'll talk?" I nod my head taking her hands and kissing her fingers.

"If you promise to listen until the end, then I will tell you everything. After I'm done, even if you hate me, I hope you won't speak the words. Please take pity on me and stay until morning. You won't have to see me for three weeks, or ever again if you don't want to." No matter how much she denies it, I know she'll hate me once I tell her the truth.

"Ren, I love you. I'm not going anywhere no matter...mmpff…" I put two fingers to her slips to stop her. It wouldn't be fair to let her finish when she has no idea what she's promising.

I open my mouth and stare up at her. So small and yet she is the strongest and bravest person I have ever met. If anyone can stare into the darkness that is my soul and not turn away in disgust and horror, it's her. Though, I don't know what would be worse, I tell her, and she hates me, or I tell her and she still loves me. If she hates me, I don't know if I'll survive without her. If she still loves me, then I'll deserve her even less than I already do.

"Ren," I press my fingers to her lips.

"I'm not full Japanese, and I was bullied for that when I was younger." My arms tighten around her and I focus on breathing. I want nothing more than to be Ren for her, a perfect gentleman she can depend on. I look into her eyes and she brings her lips to mine in a chaste kiss. It gives me the courage to speak. "As I got older I started to fight back." I explain, clinging tightly to her. "Once I was with my friend and his girlfriend, when I was confronted. Instead of walking away like they wanted, I stayed and fought."

I can see them all, their bruised faces forever etched into my memory. Their blood spills out, overflowing into the street. I am drowning in the sticky, red liquid.

"I beat them bloody until they couldn't get up, but that didn't make me stop. I just kept hitting them over and over. I was a beast, violent and savage, I hurt them, and I enjoyed it."

I pull myself away from her, staring at my hands and seeing the blood that forever stains them. These hands shouldn't be allowed to touch something as precious as her. All these hands deserve is to be cut off, as penance for my sins.

"Then what happened?" Kyouko slips her hands into mine and pulls them to her lips.

I open my dry mouth and force the words out. "One of them escaped. He started to run, and I chased after him. I," my throat restricts but I continue on despite the strain in my voice. "I can still hear the screech of the tires and the sickening thump of his body. Tina screaming so loudly, but I'm frozen in place."

I tremble as a cold wave a dread rushes up my spine. I can see Tina as clear as day. She's cradling Rick close to her chest. His blood is everywhere. I am drenched in it and she has branded me a murderer. Her eyes they are vibrant green like my mother's and filled with rage.

"I killed my best friend. I… I killed him…I…" I can't breathe. I can't see anything except Rick's broken body in the middle of the street. Had I not existed he would still be alive.

"Hey." Warm hands hold my face and I stare into those amber pools that I adore. I don't deserve the comfort, but I want it too badly to pull away. She pulls me to her, guiding my head to her chest and I lay on top of her crying like a baby. "Shhh, you're not. You're not a murderer." Her hands massage my scalp as she silences me from repeatedly declaring that I am. "Shhh, my love." I don't deserve this woman.

"Kyouko," maybe she won't hate me if I tell her the rest. How could concealing my name be any worse than causing Rick to die? "You are too good for me." I breathe in her scent, allowing it to calm my nerves. She really is too good. "Kyouko, I…" I begin to tell her, but my mother's disgusted face steals my words.

I rest my head back on her chest and new tears begin to fall. I've lied to her so much it would be impossible for even her to forgive me. She takes my face between her hands and lifts it to look into my eyes.

"You are a good person Ren. You've been punishing yourself for something that wasn't your fault. It was an accident." Her lips skim softly over my forehead and down my nose. "I wish you could see yourself the way I do."

I reach up and wipe a stray tear from her cheek. "I made you cry." I sit up, realizing where we are. "I made you miss work."

"Yashiro-san must be busy covering for us." She comments, placing a hand over mine. It's comforting, and I want nothing more than to lie back down and cuddle with her all day. "Ren?"

"Yes, princess?" I lace my fingers with hers and pull her closer.

"Why," her brows knit together, and she goes quiet.

"What?" I ask, cupping her chin.

Hesitant, she asks in a hushed tone. "Why does Hizuri Juliana affect you so much?"

My heart pounds in my head and though I try to be honest and brave, the words die in my throat.

"We should call Yukihito." I say, standing up to find my phone. "We have to get back to work."

"Ren, was your friend Kuon?" Kyouko takes the phone from me before I can press the call button.

"I missed a very important meeting and…"

"Ren, you were just opening up to me, why are you avoiding the subject now? Did I say something wrong? I'm sorry if I hurt you somehow." Shit, I've made her sad again and after she was so good and comforted me. "Ren talk to me please."

"I am Kuon." The words are barely a whisper, but I can tell she heard them. Her eyes cloud with confusion and her brows scrunch together. Then she pouts in annoyance and shoves my hand away.

"If you don't want to talk about it anymore just say so. When you lie like that it makes me feel like you're mocking me." She stands up from the bed in a huff and stomps over to the kitchen. "Since you're feeling well enough to pick on me and lie, then you must be well enough to eat and get back to work. We still have half the day left."

I am left dumbfounded by her reaction. Is this what all my lying has come to, a girlfriend who doesn't believe me when I'm telling her the truth?

"Kyouko, I'm not lying or mocking you. I really am Kuon." She snorts, pulling a block of tofu from the fridge. I scrunch my nose in disgust. "Princess, please don't make me eat. I'm still not in the best emotional state."

"You just spent nearly four hours crying, you need to eat something." She places a bottle of water on the counter. How did she know my throat was dry? My head kind of aches, too. I wonder where the aspirin… Kyouko interrupts my thoughts by placing two pills in my hands. "I won't press you for your name anymore. It's clearly not something you're comfortable sharing with me yet."

"My name is Kuon." This is crazy, she can't just not believe me.

"Kuon has blond hair like his mother. Furthermore, father and you would have greeted each other as father and son, not strangers. Neither of you is cold enough to successfully pretend to not be related and he wouldn't lie to me like you." She pauses to push my hand with the pills towards my mouth. "Don't be a baby, take your medicine." I comply like a good boy and down the pills, along with half of the bottle of water, before speaking.

"Why don't we call father then and he can tell you himself that I am Kuon?" My polite and mature Japanese girlfriend rolls her eyes and scoffs at me like a spoiled American teenager.

"Fine, you're Kuon," she concedes, but under her breath she adds, "a brown haired, brown eyed, very much alive Kuon."

"Kyouko," maybe if I remove my contacts she'll believe me.

"Look Ren, I don't want to fight about it. Can you please just stop lying for now and set the table, because if I listen to your lies anymore I'll cry." I bite my tongue. It might be better for me to drop the topic until I get back, but I can't leave her thinking that I'm mocking her.

"Can I just say something?" I ask, catching her hand and pulling her towards me. She looks up at me expectantly. "I need you to take me seriously because I'm going to be completely honest with you now." She nods, signaling me to continue. "If you started calling me by my real name, I don't think I could control myself anymore. That is the only reason, well there's another much more complicated reason, but it is for the most part my way of keeping you safe around me."

"Ren," she sighs sadly and takes my face in her hands again. "I am safe with you. You're not a murderer." I smile at her misunderstanding. "Even if you were, you wouldn't hurt me, right?"

"No princess, I won't hurt you. I'd rather die than cause you an ounce of pain. That isn't what I meant though." She cocks her head curiously. "If you start calling me Kuon, then I'll have no excuse to hold back when we lose ourselves making out. I can't have our first time be a spur of the moment, lust fueled fuck."

"Ren!" She pushes away from me, turning a gorgeous shade of red.

"It'll be my first time making love, and I kind of want that to be special. By the way, it's Kuon."

Kyouko scowls at me, "Liar! I know you're not a virgin, and there is no way you could be Kuon. I won't believe you."

"Yes," I flick her forehead. "I am Kuon. I'm not a virgin. I am more experienced in emotionally empty sex than I care to admit, but I've never loved anyone other than you. I've never made love to anyone, because my heart has always been yours. And I think, somewhere in that fairytale clouded mind of yours, you already know what I mean by always." I flick her forehead again and her scowl deepens. Feeling mischievous I lean into her ear and whisper. "Our first time making love will be slow and deliberate. I will take my time worshipping every inch of you. I'll draw you a scented bath and massage your entire body before I lay you on a bed of rose petals and…"

"Stop!" Kyouko whines cutely.

I kiss her cheek. "Thank you, my princess. I feel better." My heart is still too heavy for me to consider myself happy, but I am relieved. She still loves me. She thinks I'm a giant liar and probably an asshole, though she'd never say that, but she loves me nonetheless. That is a kind of happiness. Her love will never bring Rick back and I don't think I could ever truly forgive myself, but the loneliness doesn't bear down on my soul anymore.

"Do you?" she asks, touching my face. Actually, I'm kind of tired but I don't want her to worry about that. "Hey," She grabs my face in her hands forcing me to look into her eyes. "No matter what your name is, and no matter what you've done in the past, you are mine. You promised to be mine forever, and I've decided that I'll never allow you to break that promise. You are mine now and there's nothing you could say that will change that. I love you."

I release a heavy breath. "I'm Corn." Kyouko blinks up at me for a moment then drops her hands and returns to cooking. "Kyo…" Her hand raises, silencing me. I wait to see if she will say anything, but she's too busy making clear soup for me to eat. "Kyouko, please."

"Here, it isn't much, but I want you to eat something at least." She sets a bowl down for me on the table. "You probably prefer less anyway. I'm going to call Yashiro-san to inform him that you've suffered some sort of mental break and developed multiple personalities or something. Maybe he knows a discreet therapist we can call."

"I have not had a mental break and I do not have multi…well that isn't the point. The point is I am not lying, I am Kuon and also your childhood friend, Corn." She's shaking her head and walking over to my phone. "I'm telling the truth."

"No, you're either messing with me or you've actually convinced yourself you're a fairy prince. I could believe that you have some fairy blood, but you are not Corn, okay? I would know if you were a fairy and you're not. You don't have that strong of a magic aura. In fact, your aura is kind of demonic sometimes." She's babbling quickly and stumbling over her words. "Plus, I saw Corn recently and he was nothing like you. You're nothing alike. For starters, Corn is honest, and he can fly! You are a stupid liar who makes up stupid things when you don't want to admit you're jealous."

"I'm sorry Kyouko, I know that this was not the right time or way to tell you all this, but I assure you that it's all true. I am Kuon and I am Corn." I watch her violently shake her head and take a couple steps back away from me. "Kyouko, please listen to me."

"Please shut up, because if you keep insisting that you're Corn I might start to believe you. And if you are Corn that would mean that my first kiss happened under false pretenses. I can't believe that you would be that cruel to sully one of my most treasured memories by telling me it was all a lie." I open my mouth to say more, but her unshed tears silence me. I move forward, reaching out to her. "No!" She takes another step back and my knees buckle beneath me. That one word is worse than anything my mother could ever say to me.

"Kyouko." It pains me to see her stiffen at the sound of my voice.

"Ren can be a jerk when he wants to be, and a pervert. He's also very kind and thoughtful, and when he tells me he loves me, I feel electricity in my stomach and my veins. He makes me think that there just might be something pretty about my features, and when I'm with him I think I can achieve anything." She takes more steps away from me. "I love Ren." Her voice cracks.

"I love you too, sweetheart." I open my arms, wanting to feel her heart beat against mine.

"The problem is, I have no idea if Ren is a real person or just some character you play. Just like when you acted out the role of fairy prince. I suspect when we were kids it was to get me to stop crying, and you probably thought it was a harmless lie to a girl you'd never see again. In Guam though…you should have told me then, or how about the first time you recognized that damn rock!"

"Kyouko!" I jump up and rush after her as she runs for the door. "Kyouko, please."

"Don't touch me!"

I hold the door closed with one hand while reaching out for her with the other but let them both drop before backing away. If she wants to leave, I have no right to stop her.

"You have lied to me and manipulated me. You tricked me into trusting you. You made me love you. Why didn't you just tell me everything in Guam? Why couldn't you have just been honest for once? You turned my first kiss into a lie." She levels me with a calm, hardened stare. "You were right all along. You are a monster, just not the kind you were afraid of being. Whoever you are, I don't think you could ever hope to measure up to the illusion of perfection that is Tsuruga Ren."

"I know and I'm sorry, but nothing I ever did or said was meant to hurt you. I only ever wanted to make you happy." I close my eyes, releasing silent tears. I wouldn't be able to survive the sight of her leaving. She'll probably never want to see me again now. I can tell that I broke her heart, and for that I must never be forgiven.

A gentle tug on my arm makes me jump.

"I know that." The words make my heart skip. "Some time apart will do us good I think, but I don't want it to be forever." I raise my eyes to search hers. "I told you, you're mine. Go on your trip. I'll be here and when you come back we'll talk. Then you will never lie to me or keep anything from me again." Her tone leaves me no room to argue.

"I promise that no matter what, I will tell you everything from now on. We won't keep secrets from each other anymore." She bites her lip, then pulls me down and kisses my cheek.

"Goodbye, Ren." Is that goodbye forever or for three weeks?

"I love you." I let her go, my heart aching to keep her here. I want to cancel the trip. They could always find a replacement actor, but I will never find another Kyouko. Staying here would only make her angrier though. That wouldn't fit with Ren's image, and it's Ren she wants. I crumple to the floor, letting go of my tears as the sobbing overtakes me. I can be Ren for the rest of my life if it means I can keep her. I'll do anything for her love. Still, some selfish and greedy part of me had hoped deep down, that she had grown to love Kuon as well. What a fool I was to think anyone could ever learn to love that monster.

 **A/N: I struggled really hard with not going to a dark place with this. When I started this story I meant it to be short and fluffy but it's become a lot longer than I ever intended. Also I feel like everyone does the Kyouko finds out his name and leaves utterly furious or she handles it calmly and is even happy. If it's unclear in this she's still doesn't completely believe him and she's annoyed and confused.**


	31. You're Not Here

"Kyouko-chan? Kyouko-Chan?" Yashiro-san tip toes over to me with his phone in a gloved hand. "I was wondering if you wanted to call," he pauses when I look up at his pouting face. "Never mind." My manager sulks as he slips his new phone back into his pocket.

I grit my teeth to keep myself from lashing out at him. It isn't his fault Ren is a liar. He probably doesn't even know about Kuon and is even less likely to know anything about Corn. When he first brought up Ren's extended absence he'd only been teasing, but I had shamefully exploded and ranted about not needing that idiot. It was so rude of me to react that way to my manager, especially considering that he knows nothing of Ren's, no Kuon's, treachery. What was even more discourteous of me was when he had handed me his phone with Ren on the line and I threw it into a nearby fish tank. I've become such a disgraceful girl.

I bow my head, trying to keep myself from apologizing again. He scolded me last time I prostrated myself before him, to repeatedly beg for forgiveness while crying. I wasn't crying out of fear or guilt, but out of annoyance over missing Ren. He's a liar and he's always picking on me, and I really miss his stupid, handsome face. Yashiro-san nods to himself before leaving me with Bo to get ready.

You know you could just call him to scold him. That would be more productive than ignoring him for three weeks. Bo advises as I step into the chicken suit. Even the voices in my head are against me. I laugh at myself and pull on my head.

"Kyouko-chan!" Yuusei-san calls to me after we finish the show. "Come eat with us." I see Shinichi-san waiting with handfuls of greasy food. I want to decline but I can think of no excuse to give them.

"Yea Kyouko-chan, come have dinner!" Shinichi-san waves to me and I follow them to their room.

"Where's Hikaru-san?" I ask taking a seat on their sofa.

"He's mad at us." Shinichi-san replies with a wave of his hand as he takes a seat across from me. "We heard about your fight with your boyfriend. We were eavesdropping on Hikaru's phone call with him." Yuusei-san explains. "I think it's awful, whatever he did, it was a horrible thing."

I want to get up and excuse myself from them. Whatever Ren told Hikaru-san it wasn't the full truth and I can't listen to these two bash Ren without knowing everything. I wouldn't even want to hear it if they did know the whole truth.

"What did he do anyway? All Hikaru would let us know is that you're not speaking to Ren, and Ren is worried." Shinichi-san looks worried himself for a moment. His eyes sweep over me in an appraising manner. "He didn't hurt you, did he?"

"Tsuruga-san would never hurt me. You really shouldn't be calling him Ren by the way. It's not proper unless he gave you permission."

Shinichi-san shrugs, "He said he didn't care. Did you catch him flirting with another girl? Guys like him are used to getting away with that sort of behavior." I shake my head wishing he would stop making Ren out to be some sort of womanizing playboy. "Did you find his porn stash, because I'll have to tell you it's perfectly normal for a man or even woman to have that. He doesn't have some weird fetish, does he? He isn't a sadist or one of those people who wants you to dress in a full cat outfit? What's it called, furry? Or maybe he..."

I close my eyes and cover my ears with my hands, not wanting to hear him as he lists off different fetishes he's heard of.

"There you are! What are you doing to Kyouko-chan now?" I've never seen Hikaru-san angry, it's kind of scary. It isn't demon lord level, but it does send a shiver of fear down my spine. "I told you to leave her alone."

"Come on man we're just trying to help her out. What if your buddy Tsuruga-san," Shinichi-san throws me a pointed look, "did something to Kyouko-chan? She won't say anything because she's too nice."

"He didn't do anything to me." I say crossing my arms. "Even if he had it's my business not yours."

"Kyouko-chan," Yuusei-san speaks up. "If he didn't do anything, then why aren't you speaking to him? He sounded pretty convinced that he was losing you. We've had to talk him out of coming back to Tokyo several times already, and he hasn't even been gone a whole week yet."

I glare at Yuusei-san, not sure if he's on my side or Shinichi-san's. "I just don't feel like talking to him."

Shinichi-san sucks in his breath and feigns pain in his chest. "Ouch Kyouko-chan, even I think that's too mean. Treating someone so coldly isn't like you. Maybe she's been replaced by an alien or a robot." He sounds excited by the possibility.

"None of this is any of your business." I say flatly, wishing they would just drop it.

"I mean Ren is a nonsensical pretty boy with an unnatural obsession with you, but ignoring him for no reason is cruel. Don't you think, Hikaru?" Shinichi-san continues to talk, ignoring me.

"He is not a nonsensical pretty boy." I take an angry bite out of the food they supplied.

"I heard that his current co-star is Risa-san. You've heard of her right? She has a reputation for being a shameless flirt. She brags about it when she beds her co-stars. I wouldn't ignore Ren much longer if I were you. Even a loyal man can break if he's feeling unloved." Shinichi-san flinches when he looks into my eyes. "I'm kidding. Risa-san is a very pretty woman but most of her co-stars turn her down because of her shameless bragging. She's all about the scandal, and there's usually no truth to her words."

"Even if there were any truth to her previous scandals, Tsuruga-san wouldn't do anything with anyone other than me." I growl, crossing my arms. What kind of guy do they think Ren is?

"Let me get this straight, you still think he's a great guy?" I nod to Yuusei-san's question. "He's still handsome as hell? Has loads of money which he uses to treat you like a princess, and he is not a nonsensical pretty boy in your opinion?" I agree with all his questions. "You also have faith in him that he won't cheat on you." Again I nod, knowing Ren too well to ever believe he'd do that to me. "So, is it his obsession with you that's driving you away?"

I glare at him. "He isn't obsessed with me." Maybe he is a little obsessive and he can sometimes behave like a clingy, spoiled child, but that isn't any of their business.

"Then why won't you talk to him?" Hikaru-san asks, and I feel betrayed. I thought he was on my side.

Of course, no one understands that I just don't want to listen to his lies anymore. They all see him as the perfect gentleman Tsuruga Ren. Nobody knows the perverted, lying playboy who stole my first kiss by pretending to be a fairy. That manipulative, lying creep just wanted a kiss. Who knows how much further he would have taken that lie if he had the chance.

"Hey, I have an idea." Shinichi-san jumps up from his seat startling me. "Go out on a date with me, Kyouko-chan."

"No." I reply too quickly, and he makes a face like I actually hurt his feelings.

"Shinichi!" Yuusei-san smacks him on the back of the head.

"Ow! I only meant that Kyouko-chan has never really dated anyone else. It might be good for her to experience a date with someone other than the suave and oh so handsome Tsuruga Ren." Shinichi-san sulks and I can't help but smile. He's a little childish, like Ren.

"Oh, that actually sounds reasonable." Yuusei-san smiles. "Let's go on a date Kyouko-chan. We can go to karaoke and we'll buy you a real meal." He snatches the food from my hands. "The three of us will treat you like a princess. It'll be fun."

"You two." Hikaru-san shakes his head and rubs his temples.

"Come on, filming is over and it's time for dinner. Please leader, please." Shinichi-san and Yuusei-san beg Hikaru-san who nods his assent, and the three of them turn to me.

"Kyouko-chan, will you go out with us?" I really don't want to go out with them and listen to them bash Ren, but if they promise to behave, a night out could be a nice distraction.

"Only if you guys promise not to talk about Ren anymore. I want a night off from thinking about him." Shinichi-san rolls his eyes.

"As if you could make it a whole night. You're unnaturally obsessed with him too; you'll bring him into the conversation all on your own." Shinichi-san says and the other two nod their heads in agreement.

"I'll let Yashiro-san know that we're going out. He'll want to escort us and keep the cameras away." I say, taking my phone out.

"We should let our manager-san know too. Maybe the two of them can hang out with us. Wow Kyouko-chan, it'll be like you're dating five guys at once. Let me know which one you choose at the end of the night." Yuusei-san jokes, wrapping an arm around me. "I hope you pick me. I'd love to have such a cute girlfriend."

"I'm not picking any of you. Maybe I'll just be single again." The thought causes my heart to throb painfully.

Yashiro-san agrees to drive us to a karaoke bar, though he doesn't seem pleased about it. He spends the entire drive glaring at me in the rearview mirror. I chose to sit in back with Yuusei-san, and Shinichi-san is riding in the front. They didn't want to ride with their manager and Hikaru-san. I suspect because they want to be near me if I slip up and mention Ren.

"Kyouko-chan can you sing?" Shinichi-san asks as we head into the bar.

I shrug, having only Shoutaro's opinion to go on. He always said my voice was better than most but nothing to brag about. Whenever we watch a musical Ren always charms me into singing along with him, but I think that's just for fun. I doubt he actually thinks I can sing.

"Haven't you ever gone to karaoke with anyone?" Hikaru-san asks. "That is a pretty standard date, isn't it?"

"We don't usually go out to places like this." I blush, thinking of our special place. Who would want to go to a karaoke bar and pay for entertainment to distract them? Ren always says he prefers to spend the precious little alone time we get together without a lot of distractions.

"WE?" Yuusei-san is suddenly in my face. "We who?"

"What! No one," I push his face away from mine before Yashiro-san has a heart attack. My poor manager does not look like he appreciates the other man's proximity to me.

Shinichi-san snickers. "You sure you weren't just thinking about someone? Perhaps a monstrously tall someone?"

"He's not a monster!" Five sets of eyes stare at me, surprised by my outburst. "I mean, I wasn't thinking about anyone. Are we here to sing or what?"

"Yeah let's sing!" Shinichi-san enthuses, and he turns to the counter. "One standard room for six please." A petite girl with bubblegum pink hair smiles at him from behind the counter. Her blue eyes briefly scan over us before she inputs something into her computer. Her finger pauses for a moment and with a gasp she looks up with wide eyes.

"Natsu-san!" A manicured finger points at me.

"Um…" Usually people don't recognize me. "Yes, that's me."

A high pitched, girlish squeal penetrates my ears, causing me to wince. "I have to get my manager, stay here!" She dashes through a door and we hear a loud whisper and someone else's muffled voice coming from behind it. "No, it's her. Yes, I'm sure. No, he isn't with her. Some other men, they look like celebrities too. It's their vibe. I don't know! Like a pretty people with lots of talent and money vibe. She's really cute in person. Can we do that?" There's a long pause until the girl reappears, beaming at us. A man, I assume to be her manager, follows her out with his hands behind his back.

"Welcome Natsu-san and," he eyes the Ishibashi brothers, "friends. I was wondering, if it would be too much of a bother to ask for a photograph of you?" He sheepishly pulls a camera from behind his back. "To hang on our wall as proof."

"I'm sorry I can't allow that." Yashiro-san shoots him down before I can say anything.

The man's face falls and I bite my lip. "Yashiro-san, I wouldn't mind one picture. Do you mind?" I ask Hikaru-san knowing that Yuusei-san and Shinichi-san will agree if he does.

"Not at all, but I think he just wants one with you." Hikaru-san says with a wink.

"Really?" The man and his worker lean closer to me with their camera poised to take a close up.

"That's close enough." Yashiro-san slips in between them and me. "One picture and I get to see it before it's hung up anywhere."

"Thank you!" The manager motions for me to stand at the front desk with his worker. "I'd get in it myself but you two look better on camera than an old man like me." He takes a picture of me, then one with the brothers. Yashiro-san pulls on a pair of gloves, startling everyone except me, and snatches the camera from the man.

"I set you up in our nicest room. It's equipped with a fully stocked bar, candy machines, costumes, and you'll have your own personal chef." Is that a thing at a karaoke bar, or is this another perk of being a celebrity? "All free of charge of course." It doesn't make sense for them to not make us pay just because we appear on tv. "We hope that Natsu-san will return to us in the future with her friends." The way she says it makes me think she wants me to bring one friend in particular.

"Please, there's no need for all that. We really just want a standard room and we'll pay for it." I try to reason with her, but she shakes her head.

"My manager insists on comping you, Natsu-san. Don't worry about anything, the boss is going to love this."

"It isn't Natsu-san," Yuusei-san gripes before I can insist on paying again. "It's Kyouko-chan and she's done a lot more than play a pretty bully on a drama. She was also…"

"Oh, right I forgot to ask." The pink haired girl whips out a glossy magazine and a marker. "If it isn't too much trouble could you please sign this for me? Please!"

There is an embarrassing photo of me pulling Ren down by his tie on the inside front cover of the magazine. His shirt is open, and his pants are hanging around his hips. I remember taking the picture and how that inappropriate man accidentally fell forward and kissed me. Fujita-san thought it was funny but now that I think about it, he was being annoyingly unprofessional. I take the marker and scrawl my name across Ren's chest.

"Yay, thank you!" She hugs the magazine to herself as she motions for us to follow her up a set of stairs and into a large white and blue room. "Here is your candy bar, there's also popcorn. Bowls are up here." She opens a cabinet stocked with different colored bowls. Ren would love that, all the popcorn he can eat. He once tried to convince me that it isn't junk food since it's made from corn and corn is good for you. "Here is our food menu, you just push this button on the table and speak into it to order. We have dessert and drink menus as well. And over here is the main attraction." She aims a remote at a large screen, pulling up the music menu. "I'll leave this with you. Let me know if there is anything else you need, and I will get it for you."

A slightly mischievous voice inside me wonders if she would run to the store to get something if they don't already have it here. That's something Ren would joke about. He'd never be so cruel to a stranger, but he'd wonder what he could request to get them to run around town for him. He says it's important not to tell people you'd do anything, in case they take advantage of you not setting boundaries.

"I'll go first!" Yuusei-san snatches the remote and runs through the songs. "I wonder if they have one of our songs."

"What fun would that be?" Shinichi-san screws up his face, stealing the remote from Yuusei-san.

"Kyouko-chan, you should pick something to eat." Yashiro-san holds the menu up. "I'll order for you."

My phone begins to vibrate in my purse and I hide behind the menu while checking the text message. It's a very brief message explaining that he is almost done for the day and will call me before bedtime. As always it ends with, I love you, please reply.

"Is there something good?" Hikaru-san asks, causing me to jump and hide my phone behind my back. "Must be something really good on the menu to make you smile like that." He looks over my shoulder at the pictures of impressive looking meals.

"Kyouko-chan, look they have ice cream." Yashiro-san grasps my wrist and yanks me forward a little harshly. His eyes glare behind me at Hikaru-san. "See they have all different flavors."

Somehow, I feel like a child with an overprotective father. Biting my lip, I stand up and walk over to Yuusei-san and Shinichi-san, suggesting that we sing a song together. Ren would laugh at Yashiro-san's face right now. I frown at the thought. Why can't I just forget about him for five minutes?

"Here, let's sing this." Yuusei-san brings up a song called 'I think We'd Feel Good Together'. "You and Shinichi can sing something else together." He grabs my hand, simultaneously shoving Shinichi-san away on his way to the small stage.

The song turns out to be less of a cute duet and more of a raunchy song about wanting to feel good with someone. I can't believe Yuusei-san would embarrass me like this. The only person who seems more displeased than I am is Yashiro-san, who glares at me the entire time Yuusei-san serenades me. By the time he's done singing, I am crouched on the stage hugging my bright, red legs. Shinichi-san steps up next to me laughing.

"You lose Yuusei, you're being too forward for her." Shinichi-san jokes, taking my hand and pulling me to my feet. "I want to hear Kyouko-chan sing. You're good at English, so I picked a nice, old, English song." He hands me the microphone. "Gentleman I give you Kyouko-chan singing us a lovely little ballad, 'Dream A Little Dream'."

The music starts, and I stare wide eyed at Shinichi-san, who motions for me to start.

"Come on, leave her alone guys. She doesn't have to sing if she doesn't want to." Hikaru-san says, trying to take the remote from Shinichi-san.

"She agreed to do karaoke with us." Yuusei-san pouts.

"Well maybe she doesn't want to sing a ballad. Here try this one." Hikaru-san changes the song to a familiar tune. I giggle, it's a song from the Disney version of Hercules.

"Aw damn, Hikaru-san wins." I hear Shinichi-san say as I can't help myself and sing along to the song.

"That was fun." I enthuse, as Hikaru-san walks me to the door. Yashiro-san had protested Hikaru-san walking me to the door, but Yuusei-san and Shinichi-san insisted that Hikaru-san had won and therefore had a right to finish the date properly.

"Yea? As fun as when you're with Ren-san?" I stop walking. Why did he have to bring up the liar? "I only ask because you've been thinking about him all night. It's completely obvious that you can't help but relate the most trivial things to him. You won't answer the phone for him, but your face lights up when you see a message or missed call. I lost count of how many times I caught you checking your phone tonight."

"I'm sorry Hikaru-san. I hadn't realized I was checking my phone so often. You should have scolded me for being so rude." Ren would have scolded me or sulked about being ignored. His face would form that adorable scowl and he would say… I shake my head, casting out the obsessive, adoring thoughts of that stupid liar. "I'm despicable and pathetic."

"A little bit, yeah, but I forgive you." Hikaru-san teases with a gentle smile. "The question I have is, if you miss him so much why not talk to him? Even if you can't forgive him yet, it might do you some good to listen to him explain himself or apologize to you."

I worry my lip, not convinced that listening to Ren would be the best choice. He's too good at manipulating me. I'll only end up blindly believing whatever he says, and that feels too much like becoming a doormat again.

Soft lips press to my cheek and I jump back startled. "It never would have worked out between us Kyouko-chan. You have a fetish for authority, and a need to take care of people that I could never fulfil. I certainly would never change my eating habits to please you or continue to call you after being ignored for almost a week."

"I do not have an authority fetish." I pout. Why does everybody think that?

"You enjoy it when he scolds you." Hikaru-san states simply and I blush, unable to deny it. "You also like scolding him. And even if you don't want to admit it, you like being spoiled like a princess. The two of you have this strange dominance play, and that's okay if it's what you're into, but I don't think I would enjoy it."

"In other words, Hikaru-san, you're afraid of me?" Hikaru-san blushes, scratching the back of his head.

"Terrified." He nods, a gentle smile playing on his face. "I think you'd eat me alive, but a man like Ren would take your bite marks in stride and buy you a present for berating him." I blush, thinking about bite marks. Of course, Hikaru-san is speaking figuratively because he has no way of knowing about Cain and Setsu.

We say our goodbyes and I head inside to get ready for bed. Ren hasn't called me to say goodnight yet. He's called me every night around ten, so that he knows I won't already be asleep or still working. It's almost eleven, and I haven't felt my phone vibrate since we left the karaoke bar. Is this some trick to get me to call him? Maybe he's finally given up on me. What if Shinichi-san was right about Risa-san? No, Ren would never do that. Then again, I didn't think he was capable of keeping such a big lie. Being Kuon is one thing, but pretending to be Corn over and over again? I should have known the real Corn wouldn't be so perverted as to make me kiss him. I don't want to accept the truth, but he said it himself, didn't he? He's been in love with me since he was ten. That means Corn was never real. A tear escapes me, the real Corn was nothing more than a cruel trick Kuon played on me.

A sudden rush of anger overcomes me, and I reach into my purse for my phone. I'll call the liar and let him know how much it hurts. I'll give him a good scolding for stealing my first kiss under false pretenses and I'll… my hands come up with nothing. Where did I leave my phone? Damn it, I must have left it at the karaoke bar. Hoping to catch Yashiro-san I run back outside but he's already gone. I bite my lip, thinking of what I should do. I really want to talk to Ren now. It's really late though, the bar will be closing soon so I can't call for a ride and wait. I don't even know who I would c'all.

"I forgot something. I'm going to take the bike and go get it." Okami-san looks up worried.

"Couldn't you call Yashiro-san to get it? I don't like the idea of you being out so late all alone."

"I'll be fine!" I call to her as I jump on the bike.

"Kyouko-chan wait it's supposed to…!" I set off towards the karaoke bar, making a mental note to apologize to her later. I speed all the way there and manage to startle the manager just as he's closing up.

"Oh, it's Natsu-san. You startled me." His hand clutches his heart. "Did you forget something here?"

"Uh, my cell phone." Suddenly I'm not too sure this was a good idea. It's late and I think he's the only one still here. What if he tries something? No, I shake my hand. He's a harmless old man and he seems nice enough.

"Go right in then and get it. I'll wait right here for you." He holds the door open for me and I take a nervous step into the bar. I release a breath when he doesn't follow me in, then I make my way to the room we'd been in. It's locked.

I sigh and turn to head back downstairs only to find him behind me. I jump startled. If it comes down to it I think I can take him. He holds up a set of keycards.

"I forgot to give you the keycard." He walks past me and swipes the card. "There you go."

"Thank you." My skin crawls staring into the dark room, and I think of that damned beagle. What if this old man is him in disguise? Could I fight him off like last time?

"Excuse me miss?" A gentle hand on my shoulder startles me. "I don't mean to be rude, but it's supposed to start raining soon." He motions for me to enter the room. "Here." He flips a switch just inside the door and the room lights up. "Please find your phone. I'll go wait by your bike, so it doesn't get stolen."

"Thank you," He heads back down the stairs and I find my phone between the couch cushions.

"Thank you." When we are outside I bow to him. A few drops of rain land in my hair.

"Listen it's late and the rain might get bad would you like a ride home?" He suggests pointing to his car.

"That won't be necessary. I don't live that far away. Please don't worry about me." Hesitantly he nods, before heading over to his car. Maybe I will force Ren to come here to take a picture. He would hate that type of cheesy publicity, but he might be grateful to the man for helping me.

I hop on the bike feeling heavier raindrops begin to fall. I try to head in the direction of the Darumaya, but the rain becomes so heavy that I can hardly see five inches in front of my face. Maybe I should have taken the ride from the manager-san. The bike slips, forcing me to jump off or fall with it. If I continue to ride it in this rain I could hurt myself. I decide to walk the bike along the sidewalk. It'll be much slower getting to Darumaya, but I'll get there in one piece.

"Hey!" A car pulls up beside me, and for a moment I imagine my liar has come to get me out of the rain. I turn to find a stranger in a limo. "Do you need a ride?"

"No thank you, I'm almost there." I'm pretty sure Kanae and Ren would scold me severely if they ever learned I took a ride from some random stranger. The manager-san would have been a better option.

"My boss insists on getting you out of the rain." The driver stops his limo and exits with an umbrella. "Please, miss it's cold out here and my mistress would like to speak to you."

"Mistress?" I stop walking to eye the back window of the limo. No getting close to that car would not be a smart idea. I shake my head and continue to walk.

"Kyouko!" A familiar voice calls out to me. It isn't female though and it makes my heart jump. "Kyouko you get in this limo and out of the rain this instant." A tall, blond man exits the car, becoming drenched in the process. "As your father, I will not allow you to walk around in the rain like this."

"Father!" I dash forward and jump into his waiting arms.

Mini Bonus: Kuu

I walk into our home to the sound of deep, heartbroken sobs. Startled I rush over to my wife checking for any signs of harm. In her hands is a photo of our son smiling beside my little Kyouko. They look happy.

"Sweetheart what is it?" My love looks up at me. Her face is a mess with tears.

"He's going to hate me forever." Her voice cracks as she collapses against my chest. "I shouldn't have said anything, but I really don't think he would have ever told her the truth without being pushed into it."

"What are you talking about?" What kind of scenario has this woman been imaging now?

"Kuon, I had to be cruel to force the truth out of him. I had to sacrifice his love for me. I couldn't think of any other way to get that idiot to be honest with her. It pained me deeply, and I want nothing more than to hate that little...urgh! Damn her for being so goddamned likable!"

"You went to visit Kuon?" She recoils from me, realizing she's in trouble. "After he specifically asked you to stay away, Julie you were warned."

"I didn't go to see him." She pouts, crossing her arms like a petulant child. "I wanted to meet that little girl you both love so much."

"Who?" Little girl? Could she mean Maria-chan?

"What do you mean who? Kuon only has one girlfriend. At least we can say we raised him right. As far as I know, he's never cheated on anyone."

"Kuon has a girlfriend?" I sit back and think if there were any girls around him when I visited. I recall he had a fondness for a certain pink clad Love Me member, but even if he did like her he'd never do anything with her, would he? I shake my head at my own question. That's preposterous, Kyouko's too young for a relationship. She should be focused on school and work.

Julie smiles mischievously at me, evidently forgetting her earlier grief. "Kidnapper-san didn't tell you?"

 **A/N: Sorry for the wait and the filler-ish chapter. All I really wanna do right now is write smut but thanks to a certain spoiler I saw I feel sick every time I think of Ren. It's actually perfect for this story because Kyouko feels a confusing mix of betrayal and happiness thinking of him and that is exactly what I feel that makes me sick. If the worst case scenario happens and that insufferable cowardly liar does what I have seen men do in that situation than I will hate him forever and give up Skip Beat. Keeping my fingers crossed that something good happens next chapter. Funny enough it was meant to be him picking her up at the end but that changed because now I want him to suffer.**


	32. Loved

"The kitchen is this way," I say to my curious father. His eyes survey the apartment as I show him where to set down the groceries. "We have a bar in the living room, but I'm not allowed to use it. Nii-san says I'm not old enough." I giggle at father's aghast expression when I call Ren Nii-san. It's strange, but I feel very close to Setsu with father being here. He is after all Kuon's real dad and my surrogate father. Does that make our relationship forbidden? I shiver slightly at the thought.

"He had better not be supplying you with alcohol. That little brat corrupting my daughter while I wasn't looking. I trusted him to look after you too." Father sulks as he pulls out ingredients to make me what he calls a super special treat. Even though I think he's just making Nikujaga.

"Don't be like that father, Kuon is a good boy. He really is good to me." father's eyes narrow at my words.

"I do that with your mother too, make excuses and reason away the lies. It isn't healthy." He admits, looking around the kitchen. "Where's the cutting board?"

"Up there," I say, pointing to the top cabinets. "He likes to help in the kitchen, so he hides most things up there. There's a smaller one down below that I use when he isn't here. You," I glare at his long legs, "won't have any problem reaching anything though." Why is everyone in this family tall except me? I throw a glance back at Juliana who is standing just outside the kitchen, looking thoroughly ashamed.

"You know what though, this incident is the first time in years she's been able to successfully lie to me. I'm a little impressed, but it's never going to happen again. Right honey?" Juliana flinches. "Now she's going to sulk and act like I gave her some severe punishment. It's her own brain that's making her feel that way."

"You didn't punish her?" I ask, picking out the biggest potatoes to wash.

"For what, lying?" He shrugs. "She lied about visiting her children, it's not like she hid her real identity from me. I know how to pick my battles." I balk at his words and he smiles wickedly at me. "You know my name wasn't Kuu when I met Julie. I was Shuuhei Hozu for the first year of our relationship."

"You didn't tell her the truth even after you started dating?" I'm shocked. It seems that Juliana isn't the only parent who is good at lying.

"Why would I? We didn't start out as a serious couple. We were both too busy for anything serious, and Julie wasn't even stationed in Japan. It was a friendly relationship with the possibility of becoming more when we were both ready. Besides, I had been Shuuhei for so long that sometimes I forgot it wasn't my real name. The name had a personality of its own and I became Shuuhei Hozu." I wonder if Ren feels confused about who he really is?

"But a relationship built on lies," I stop myself from saying that it can't last.

"Everybody lies, Kyouko." Father says sternly. "You lie all the time. In fact, you lied to me when we last spoke on the phone and you said everything was going well. You did not mention that Julie was here, and you never said anything to me about what's going on between you and Ren. Gaw!" He scratches his head furiously. "My children are in a taboo relationship! Why did I just think that they make a cute couple?"

"Um," Julie speaks up. "Dear don't you think the two of you should dry yourselves off? It can't be comfortable in those wet clothes." I turn and glare at her, causing her to flinch back. Maybe she's afraid I'll slap her again.

"Kyouko, your mother is right. You should go change and dry your hair." Juliana cowers away from me when I walk passed her to go to my room. When I am finished I open the door and almost step on her blonde head bowed against the floor. Does she think I'll forgive her if she begs?

"I have been the absolute worst kind of mother. I do not expect you to forgive me Kyouko-chan, but I want you to know that I understand why he loves you." How can she understand that when _I_ don't even get it? I'm plain, I have no sex appeal, I'm completely gullible and naïve, and even my own best friend thinks I'm odd and embarrassing in public.

"I need to go help father in the kitchen." I say, stepping over her.

"You have impressed me Kyouko," Julie says making me scoff. Maybe I wanted to impress her before, but now I only want her to leave. I don't know what father sees in her. "I don't care if you hate me. I don't even mind him hating me. Someday I hope you understand the sacrifice I have made for him."

"What are you talking about?" All she did was insult us and hurt Ren.

"He has trouble telling the truth. I know he gets that from me. That's why I also know that he would've put off telling you the truth for as long as he could. It was pure selfishness on my part. You see, I've waited so long for my son to be happy, and he's never going to find happiness if he can't truly accept himself."

"Let me guess, I'm supposed to help him accept himself?" She looks up at me with those green eyes. Corn's eyes. How did I not see it before? They could almost be twins. "You're both too cruel." People shouldn't be allowed to be that beautiful, especially if it allows them to lie and manipulate so easily.

"Kuon was a lot of things, but he was never cruel." Her eyes narrow at me.

"He's always been cruel to me. Lying to me and tricking me into doing exactly what he wanted, and manipulating my feelings. He knew everything that I've been through. He preyed on my naivete and willingness to take care of the people I love." I watch her rise to her knees in confusion. What did she expect me to say? That her son was the best man ever and he never did anything wrong?

"I'll admit that he has always liked to tell stories." I snort at her words.

"Oh yeah, he loves his stories. He can spin an effortless web of lies to get himself out of any situation." She opens her mouth to protest, but I cut her off. "You know what the sick thing is? He learned how to lie as a way of gaining affection. You taught him that." She flinches away, her green eyes filling with guilt. "He is insecure and unhappy because you taught him that the only way anyone could love him was if he became the most extreme and ideal version of himself. Tsuruga Ren isn't even remotely realistic. He's a charming, good looking, rich actor, who is always nice and never has a mean thing to say about anyone. Kuon, the real, vulnerable, little boy who ran away from your oppressive love is short-tempered, scary jealous, and possessive"

"I'm sorry," she says after a long moment of silence. "I am truly sorry, Kyouko-chan."

"I don't care." I hear myself saying. "I told you before, he is mine. You taught him how to lie to get what he wants. I taught him how to love and I'll show him how to keep that love." I begin to walk away. "I want you to know that I forgive you, but neither of us needs you. If you ever hurt him again, it will be the last time you are ever permitted to be near him."

Her shining green eyes brim with tears, but she blinks them away. "I'm glad you feel that way." I don't show my confusion at her beaming face. Why does my threatening to cut all ties between her and Ren make her happy?

"Hey, you two, if you want to eat, get in here and help me cook." Father calls us back to the kitchen. "Julie, set the table." He places a hand on my head. "Please try to get along with your mother. She really does have a lot of great qualities." I smile at him, hoping that I won't have to disappoint him. "Good luck breaking that boy of his lying, I've been trying with this one for years. The only thing that's changed is my proficiency at sniffing the lies out."

We cook a nice meal together, though father ends up eating over half of it by himself. Julie keeps her head bowed at the table, injecting a few scattered comments but remaining mostly silent. I feel a little bad for chastising her, especially since she seems to be berating herself enough for both of us. Does Ren do that? How can these two gorgeous individuals be so self-conscious and insecure?

"You can stay in my room tonight." I offer, seeing father yawn.

"Nonsense, we won't put you out. We'll stay in Kuon's room." I frown at this and block his way before he can start walking that way.

"No! Ren's room is a mess. I couldn't let you stay in there. He leaves his clothes all over the floor, and I think he sneaks snacks in there. There's wrappers everywhere. There's also ummm… the bathroom is closer to my room and…"

"That doesn't sound like Kuon." Father scratches his head. "He was never a messy boy, and he wouldn't willingly eat anything let alone sneak food in his room. Isn't there a bathroom attached to his room?" He flicks my head. "You're not turning into a liar too are you? That boy is teaching you terrible things."

"Kuu darling, isn't it that aside from Kuon, Kyouko-chan is the only other person who has slept in his bed?" I hear Julie whisper to him and I look away embarrassed.

"Oh." Father frowns and narrows his eyes at me. "So, your room is nothing more than a lie too isn't it? You trick people into believing your relationship is chaste and sweet but really, you're, you, with that man. I'm going to kill him!"

"Kuu!"

"My little girl, doing this and that! I think I'm having a heart attack. My children are incestuous. Why can't I stop thinking that they're too adorable not to be together? Maybe I raised them too close. Was that it Kyouko? Did I praise him too much in front of you? No other man will ever come as close to perfection as your brother, and of course he's smart enough to see that you are flawless." I quiet his meltdown by wrapping my arms around his waist and kissing his cheek.

"Goodnight father." He hugs me back, kissing the top of my head lovingly.

"Goodnight sweetheart. I'll make you a western breakfast in the morning." He and Julie head towards my room.

"Julie." My mouth says her name without my consent. I am the most startled of the three of us when I close the space between us and give her a somewhat awkward hug. "Goodnight mom." I don't know why saying those words makes me cry.

"Goodnight, Kyouko-chan." Julie pets my hair and kisses my forehead. I don't know if we've begun to repair our relationship, or if this is just a show to make father happy. Could this be considered a lie if I don't know the truth myself?

My phone begins to ring non-stop around four in the morning. Groggy and annoyed I answer it without looking.

"Hello."

"You're alive." An annoyed voice comes through the receiver.

"Tsuruga-san, it's way too early to deal with your obsessive nature, I'm going back to sleep." I'm being rude I know, but he pisses me off when he goes overboard with his clinginess.

"Call Kotonami-san and the couple at Darumaya first." He says in a commanding tone. I would protest this order, but it confuses me.

"Why?"

"Because they've been trying to get a hold of you since you ran off in the rain last night. Where are you anyway? I'll call Yukihito and tell him you're alright." I cringe and look at my phone to see that I've missed countless texts and calls from Okami-san, Kanae, and Yashiro-san. "Kyouko, now is not the time to give me the silent treatment. Where are you? You are safe, aren't you?" Despite his attempt to sound angered by my silence, his concern oozes from his voice.

"I'm fine." I say sitting up. "I'm at home in your bed. I missed you."

"I miss you too princess." I can hear the hope welling up inside him. "But right now there are some very concerned people who need to hear your voice. If I call you tomorrow…"

"I probably won't answer." I interrupt him, imagining his puppy dog eyes as he whines into the phone. "But you should try anyway."

"I will. Bright and early, before you go to school, I'll call. I'll try again around lunch time."

"I'll be waiting to hear your messages." I tease him a little, though I really don't think I'll answer for him. I'm not quite ready to forgive him yet.

"Goodnight, Kyouko."

"Ren." I call to him before he can hang up.

"Yes!" He asks a little too excited.

"I love you."

 **A/N: I was avoiding homework when I wrote this. So about a month ago I ordered myself two new Ball Jointed Dolls and yesterday I finished paying for them. I'm so excited because I'm going to attempt to make my own Ren and Kyouko dolls. Yay! Hopefully I get them soon and I'll post pictures somewhere. I'm not very good with social media or anything like instagram so we'll see how that goes.**


	33. Lonely

Five days, just five more days and he'll be here. Then he can deal with his overbearing parents and I can rest. No more early morning feasts, no more shopping trips where we buy out the entire store, and no more being excessively praised at the drop of a hat. I love them, but I don't know how much more I can take of their love.

"It's suffocating me! They're worse than Ren."

Kanae rolls her eyes at me before she turns so I can zip her dress. She's been glowering at Julie since they met. She isn't convinced by the overly loving act. We exit the dressing room and Kanae continues to peruse the racks of clothes.

I'm not sure if I'm convinced Julie likes me now either, but it makes father happy, so it couldn't hurt to play along. Kanae thinks that I'll get too caught up in the act and end up getting hurt. I'm not too worried though, as long as she doesn't cause Ren any more pain. Besides, Julie has apologized multiple times and I don't want to hold a grudge against Ren's mother. Not that I can tell Kanae about that part. She just thinks Julie is father's wife and that she was a little jealous of me when we first met.

"Why do you two insist on shopping clearance?" Julie asks, holding up a simple dress, which she's learned is what I like, that I still could probably never afford. "Kuon likes you in skirts, doesn't he?" Her words are posed as a question, but I suspect she already knows the answer. That pervert likes dresses and skirts and shorts on me. He even confessed that my school uniform excites him. "You have nice legs." She sounds like her perverted son.

"Who's Kuon?" Kanae asks, and Julie smiles sheepishly.

"Moko-san look matching best friend outfits!" I yank her over to the display of two mannequins dressed in the same outfit in different colors. "We should get these."

"No." Kanae turns me down flat, pulling her arm out of my grasp. She walks back over to the clearance section, grumbling about excessively priced clothes, and I shoot a glare at Julie.

"Sorry." She whispers, holding up another dress. "You look good in blue."

"What are you his clone?" I push the dress away. "I already have a closet full of dresses. More than I need, and I don't think he's going to stop buying them, so can we please go do something else?" I should be kinder to her, well at the very least I shouldn't be so volatile. It is her own fault in a way, though. She was mean to Ren and I just can't trust her. Still, I want to be her friend.

Julie pouts and I think I'm going to be in trouble. Will she tell father that I was mean to her? It's not like she can punish me in any other way. Father is the only leverage she has. I don't want to hurt his feelings.

"Fine." She turns suddenly, placing the clothes on the return rack. She really has been trying to be nice to me. I think all the absurdly loving parent stuff is driving me crazy. With a smile plastered onto her face, she turns back to me and asks, "what would you like to do?"

What I would like to do is go home, or even to LME for Love Me work. Anything would be better than spending the day with Julie and her fake motherly smile. I hate it when she does that; she's just like Ren. Neither one of them can be honest when someone has hurt their feelings or made them upset.

I sigh, trying to think of a compromise.

"Can we go get ice cream?" Both Julie and Kanae balk at my suggestion and I shrink sheepishly, having forgotten for a moment that they count calories. Though her husband is a bottomless pit, Julie is pickier about what she eats.

"Not everyone is naturally small Kyouko," Kanae says, jabbing me in the stomach.

"Your father wouldn't like it if I spoiled your dinner." Julie lies, accepting the clothes Kanae has picked out and taking them to the counter to purchase. We both know that father's only complaint would be that he didn't get any ice cream. She's just afraid she won't be able to resist eating two cones again. The woman loves sweets, and that is just about the one thing I've found that she doesn't have in common with her son.

"Kyouko, your phone is ringing," Kanae says and Julie eyes me suspiciously.

My phone has been ringing all day. It's just Ren calling to flirt again. I don't know what to do about him. He'll be back in five days and I still don't know if I can forgive him. I do miss him, however, and I'm afraid that when I see him I'll turn stupid and give into his charm. I press decline, ignoring the gazes of my best friend and my boyfriend's mother. Neither of them knows the whole truth, so they can't judge me. Nobody knows the truth and I feel really lonely. Who can I talk to about this? A text comes through and I read it.

 _I miss you._

"Julie-san, do you think we could go home now? I'm a little tired." Her eye twitches, annoyed by my lack of enthusiasm.

Julie has tried very hard to act like the mother I have always dreamed of. Trouble is I can tell that some of it is an act. She's good at it, so I can sometimes forget that she must hate me, but her initial behavior was proof enough for me. I am not someone a mother can love. Am I being unreasonable to wish she would just go back to America and leave me alone? I know the only reason she has stayed this long and tried so hard to please me is to see her son.

With a sigh that genuinely sounds sad, she nods her head. "Yes, I'll call the car to come to pick us up and have you dropped off. Would you like to go to the Darumaya or the apartment?"

"We'll go to my place," Kanae says, and Julie's frown deepens.

"Alright." A fake smile is plastered onto her face as she lifts her phone to her ear. Should I feel bad for hurting her feelings? Is she faking it again?

Ren would probably know. I wonder if she'll finally leave once he gets here. The thought is awful, but I don't want her to take away from my time with him. I sigh, realizing again how much I miss him.

Kanae takes my arm and the three of us walk in awkward silence to the limo, already waiting outside. Julie's driver is a really nice guy. He dropped me off at work one morning and confessed that he was proud his young master finally found a nice girl. The guy doesn't look very old, but he said he's been working for father since before he married Julie. I think he must have been the manager of Shuuhei Hozu. Will Yashiro-san still be with us when we have a family? The thought causes my cheeks to burn as I realize I'm assuming we'll get married. Do I even want to get married?

"Kyouko?" Kanae scrunches her face curiously at me.

"Nothing!" I enter the limo and turn my focus to the scenery, which begins to fly by out the window.

The image of myself dressed all in white doesn't bring the anxiety it once had. Instead, there is a warm feeling in the pit of my stomach as I envision Ren, with blond hair and green eyes, falling down on one knee and holding a gorgeous velvet box out to me. I bite my lip, attempting to fight the smile from spreading across my face. I wish he were here.

Wait! I'm supposed to be mad at him still. I promised to scold him when he got home, and he said he'd accept any form of punishment I deemed fit. He pleaded with me to stop the silent treatment because it's more than he can bear. Whenever I do answer the phone for him, I smile and say nothing as he begs and pleads. A litany of praise heats up my ear through the phone and he'll supply me with the worst suggestions for punishments. He'd prefer being flogged and chained up, or forced to eat a five-course meal, to me not talking to him. I bite my lip as we slow down close to Kanae's apartment. Would he expect me to allow him to punish me like that? In one of my drawers at his place, there is a stash of animal ears and tails. He told me it's for when I misbehave, and I was too embarrassed to inquire further about them. At the time I thought it'd been a joke, but could Ren be into that sort of thing? Would I be into that sort of thing?

"Wake up space cadet we're here," Kanae growls, yanking on my arm.

"Kyouko," Julie calls to me as the three of us exit the car.

I blush, embarrassed to be thinking of such things while with his mother. If she could read thoughts, she would accuse me of being a horribly perverse and wanton girl. Her arms open to me and there is a genuine smile on her face. I regret thinking so many bad things about her as her warm arms close around me. There is so much of Ren in her that I can't help wanting her love to be real.

"Goodnight my love." She says, kissing my forehead. "Your father will call you before he goes to bed. We'll be leaving soon, and he wants to set up a day to spend with you and Ren before we go."

"Go?" I've spent the past few weeks wishing she would leave, but hearing her say those words makes me sad. Where will they go?

"Yes, we have to go home, sweetie. We have work waiting for us and pets who must miss us. My personal assistant is waiting to see pictures of you two." Julie pats my head. "I'm sorry we started out so poorly, but I want you to know that you are a beautiful girl. I couldn't have raised a better daughter if I tried. In fact, I probably would have ruined you if I had tried." There is a sadness in her eyes that I don't quite understand.

"Thank you," I say, not sure how else to respond. She kisses my cheek before getting back into her limo, leaving me with Kanae.

We walk up to her apartment and put the clothes Julie bought her away. I can tell she wants to ask me something, but I don't think I'll want to answer.

"I'll start dinner," I tell her, heading to her kitchen.

"Kyouko, what did Ren do?" She asks, touching my hand.

"I told you, he's a liar," I say, closing my eyes so I won't have to look into hers.

"What did he lie about? You swear he didn't cheat on you or do anything to purposely hurt you, but you won't give me any details." I pull my hand away, wanting to tell her everything. "Tell me."

"There's nothing to tell. Ren lies. I don't think he can help it, but I'm just sick of hearing his stories." I want to talk to her about Corn and Guam but at the same time, I don't. I don't really want anyone else to know about our secret time as children or the magic kiss. I couldn't tell her if I wanted to anyway. If I did, I'd have to figure out a way around telling her about Kuon.

"What did he lie about?" She asks again.

I shrug, and she makes a noise of disgust.

"Why can't you just talk to me about it? I'm your best friend, Kyouko, you're supposed to tell me everything." My jaw clenches. She grips my shoulders, forcing me to turn around. "Why won't you talk to him?"

"I don't want to talk to him. He'll only lie to me again."

"Well, then why don't you just dump him? If you are so sure that he won't stop lying to you then end it."

"I don't want to end it!" I shove her off, angry at the suggestion.

"Then talk to him!"

I squeeze my eyes tight to hold in the tears. She doesn't know the whole story, so I can't be mad at her.

"I know you mean well but I can't tell you everything. There is so much you don't know, and I just can't tell you." I walk right past her and storm out of the apartment.

I have nowhere to go and no one to talk to. I would make up a hypothetical situation to tell Kanae, but that feels too much like lying. I can't be mad at Ren, then turn around and do the exact same thing. The ringing in my ear startles me and I look at my hand to see that I called Ren unconsciously. He's the only person who knows what he did. I sigh, waiting for him to answer.

The answering machine picks up and I hold the phone out to glare at it. "All day you've been calling me and when I call back you don't answer. What the hell, Ren?"

"Kyouko?" Kanae touches my shoulder. "Come back inside. We can order something to eat and I promise not to ask any more questions."

My phone rings and Kanae sighs, heading back up to the apartment without me. I look down and a strange surge of disappointment curls in my stomach.

"Father, hi," I answer the phone as cheerfully as I can manage, and whether Kuu notices I'm faking or not he doesn't comment on it.

"How's my girl?" He asks, around what I assume is a mouthful of junk food.

"I'm great, mother took us shopping. She said you would call to set up a meeting with Tsuruga-san and me, but I don't think that's possible." I really don't want to be in the same room as all three of those overbearing people. They would smother me with praises and try to outdo each other with gifts.

"Nonsense, I've already arranged it with the boss and Yashiro-san. They have it all planned out; I just wanted to call and let you know. I have some choice words for that boy you've chosen to date." The way he says it almost makes me fear for Ren's life. Father wouldn't hurt his own son, would he?

"I really don't want to have dinner with you bullying Ren. That would be too weird."

"Good, because we're not having dinner, we're having lunch. In any case, you have no choice. I've already spoken to the lovely couple from the Darumaya and that boyfriend of yours. We're all going to get together for a pleasant afternoon to discuss this relationship of yours."

I open my mouth to protest. This sounds too much like they think they can dictate what Ren and I are allowed to do together.

"That's all I called to say, goodnight honey," Father says, and I reply in kind without thinking.

I walk back up to Kanae's apartment, annoyed by the conversation.

"Five more days. Just five more days, and then hopefully he'll be able to talk some sense into them." I grumble to a slightly confused Kanae.

We watch a talk show while we eat, and chat about work. Kanae does everything I always wanted a best friend to do, so why am I so miserable? I'm such an ungrateful brat. I can't even be happy when it seems I'm finally getting everything I've always dreamed of. I have a best friend to gossip with late into the night. I have loving, albeit overbearing, parents now. That isn't enough for me though. No, I have to be a complete love fool and want that stupid liar.

I can't sleep, not even with Kanae sharing her bed with me. I stare at her pretty face and wish for strong arms to whisk me away back to his bed. Warmth rises to my cheeks and ears as I imagine all the things I've let him get away with in his bed. His hands always steal sneaky touches and his lips find the least appropriate places to kiss while remaining modest. Worst of all are those smoldering eyes of his that make me feel naked. I sit up, regretting my thoughts as they've created a familiar wetness between my thighs.

"You are a pervert Kyouko." I berate myself as I tiptoe my way to the bathroom to clean myself up. "With Moko-san there too. You really are the worst."

I retrieve my phone and call Ren. Maybe if he tells me one of his stories I'll be able to sleep. Those lies of his are good for at least that much. The phone goes straight to voicemail without ringing. I listen to the answering machine clenching my jaw. Has he finally given up on me? I didn't mean to make him mad. Sighing, I write a note for Kanae and sneak out. Stupid fool that I am, I catch the last train to Ren's place and snuggle under his blankets. His bed is warm, and it smells like him. With any luck, it'll lull me to sleep.

I inhale deeply and press myself into the bed. Closing my eyes, I think about the last time he was here with me. I can still feel his hands rubbing my stomach as his lips press into my neck. At the time, I wondered what it would feel like if he dipped his hands further down into the waist of my shorts. My fingers play with the waistband of the pants I'm wearing. I imagine his large hands slipping just beneath the fabric. He'd smile against my neck as I'd grip his wrist and bring it back to my stomach.

"Ren," I sigh snaking my hand down. I bet it would feel nice if he touched me. "Ah!"

I lick my lips feeling the wetness between my thighs. It isn't my fingers though, it's his fingers slipping over my warmth. I picture his face as I roll onto my back. He's looking down at me with a surprised smile on his face. Our lips meet and one of his fingers fills me up. I gasp at the intrusion.

"What am I doing!" I pull my hand away and sit up. The empty room brings a frown to my face. Why couldn't he have just appeared suddenly? I shake my head, that is a dangerous thought. I don't want him to catch me doing such a reprehensible thing in his bed. What would happen if he did?

I reach for my phone only to see that there are no new missed calls. Why hasn't he called me back yet?

"I should have stayed at Moko-san's. If I have to feel this lonely I would rather have her around." I slump back down to my pillow and breath in the familiar scent of my liar. "Only five more days." If he would come home right now I might forgive him.

I roll onto my side and will the bedroom door to open. I close my eyes and imagine him arriving home early. He'll walk in and spot me on the bed. The smile on his face will send shivers through me. My heart will skip as he slowly makes his way over to me. I can feel his hands cupping my face and sliding down over my neck to my shoulders. I sigh pretending my small hands are his large ones skimming over my breasts.

What is wrong with me? I feel so frustrated and confused. My body only seems to want Ren, but my heart keeps screaming at me that he'll hurt me again.

"That's sexy." A husky voice startles me out of my fantasy and I bolt upright, raising my hands up in a show of innocence. "Hi." The voice says, sounding thoroughly amused.

Green eyes stare at me when I turn on the bedside lamp.

"Corn?"


	34. I Love You

"What?" I ask hiding my annoyance at finding her glaring at me. She's been doing that all day. I want to point out how rude it is but that would only get me into more trouble.

Admittedly I should have knocked before entering the bedroom. I expected her to be asleep though, not doing _that._ My only intention was to kiss her cheek and steal a pillow, so I could sleep on the couch. Instead, I found myself mesmerized by the most erotic scene I've ever laid my eyes on. Her hands were descending down her body in a way I have only dreamed of doing. How many times has she done that in my bed? Why did I have to open my big mouth before she got to the good part?

Following the exclamation _Corn_ , a pillow smacked me in the face and she screamed at me to get out. I had planned to sleep on the couch anyway, in case she was still too angry to share a bed with me. Somehow being ordered out of my own room had irritated me though. Because I'm an asshole and an idiot I refused breakfast this morning to get back at her. Now I'm driving her home in silence as she continues to glare daggers at me.

"I'm sorry." I don't even know what I'm apologizing for now.

Maybe I shouldn't have worked so hard to make it home early. I only wanted to see her and with any luck, hear her voice. Should I have not said anything in the first place? If she never knew about my lies, she would have no reason not to speak to me. If I could, I would pretend to be Ren for her forever. I don't care if that's wrong, not if it makes Kyouko happy. I'd give up Kuon forever to make her happy. She deserves someone more like Ren anyway.

"We need to stop at the store for groceries. I'm not going to that overpriced store in your apartment." I eye her quizzically as I stop at a red light.

"I didn't know you were coming over tonight. Does that mean you've forgiven me?" I bite my lip like a nervous teenager. My hands tighten around the steering wheel, attempting to quell the hope welling up inside.

"Is there some reason you don't want me to come over."

Like the fool that I am, I reach over to take her hand and bring it to my lips. She yanks it away with an annoyed snarl. I should stop hoping for forgiveness, especially since I know I don't deserve it.

"I'm not sure I want to have you over when you're pissed at me." I say, feigning annoyance to mask the pain of her rejection.

I should take her to the Darumaya, but I'm too much of a masochist not to turn towards the closest grocery store. I insist on paying for everything since Kyouko can't find her wallet. Probably because it's in my pocket, but she doesn't need to know that yet.

"What are you making?" I ask, once we have everything put away. She sighs and my heart twists, expecting more silence.

"Curry rice." Her voice startles me and that ever-present twinge of hope squeezes my chest. I guess I never learn. "You can peel the potatoes and carrots."

I do as I'm told and work beside her in an odd sort of silence. There is a tenseness coming from her that doesn't feel like anger. She won't look at me, and if I get too close to her she jumps away. Curious, I tap her shoulder. Suddenly she's across the kitchen and I'm the only one cooking.

"Excuse me." She bows to me before leaving the room, hiding her face in her hands.

Frustrated, I shut off the stove and follow her. Before she can make it to her bedroom I catch her arm. She whimpers and tries to pull away.

"Kyouko, I'm sorry." All of my desperation and guilt boils to the surface and I lose my grip on her. "Please talk to me."

She turns around, eyes brimming with tears and red as a tomato from her neck to her hairline.

"I'm sorry." Her voice is barely audible, and she takes a deep shaking breath. "I'm sorry." She says again, and I stop her before she can bow.

"You said that." I say, taking her hands in mine. "Why don't you say what you really want to say? Scream at me, call me a lying asshole, and punish me, come on. I won't object to any punishment." Thinking for a minute, I add, "except the silent treatment. I can't handle this silence anymore."

She shakes her head. "I'm sorry for kicking you out of your own room last night. I was embarrassed. I wasn't expecting you to come back so soon and I certainly never wanted you to see that. I mean, I don't normally do that in your bed. That is, I've never done that especially not in your bed. That was disrespectful of me and I promise to never do it again."

Momentarily confused, my mouth hangs open. Today's silent treatment was because I caught her masturbating, and not my lies? She shifts nervously from foot to foot as the quiet stretches between us.

"Don't say never." I tease, earning a shocked expression. Our eyes meet briefly before she clamps hers shut.

"I'm sorry too. For not telling you sooner." I'll apologize for that until she says I'm forgiven, and probably even after.

Kyouko shakes her head. "I didn't make it easy for you, did I? You tried to hint to me that you liked me, and I acted as though I never noticed how you treated me. I constantly put up a barrier between us, and though I don't condone what you did in Guam, I understand why you did it. You wanted to spend time with me without my walls."

"Still, I shouldn't have manipulated a kiss out of you or stolen the second one. I'm sorry."

"Don't lie." I flinch at the hard edge in her voice. "You're not sorry you kissed me, so don't say you are. I'll have no more lies between us," she pauses until I look her in the eyes. "Kuon, do you understand? We do not lie to each other. The rest of the world can have their perfect gentleman, and I'll have you."

I gulp hard as she advances toward me. Suddenly over her embarrassment, she wraps her arms around my neck and pulls me down so that my lips hover over hers.

"I'm not sorry you kissed me in Guam. I'm not sorry that you told stories to a sad, little girl to cheer her up. I'm not sorry that I ran away from my dull, nothing life, and I'm not sorry I walked in on Fuwa being an asshole. I'm not sorry I chose LME, and I'm not sorry that I met the most irritating, fake gentleman in show business. I'm not sorry that my pretend gentleman turned out to be my fairy prince. I'm not sorry, Ren, that I love you no matter who you are." She releases a heavy sigh and tears spill from her eyes. "I am sorry that I haven't been speaking to you, because I missed you. The only person I was punishing was myself."

I take her face between my hands and press my forehead to hers.

"Don't cry, princess," I say wiping her tears. "Shh." I bring her to my chest and cradle her head against my heart. "Don't cry." I whisper softly as my own tears fall into her hair.

"I'm not angry, but you hurt me. You didn't trust me with the truth and that hurts." I hold her tight, my tears freely flowing.

I'm not sure how long we cry in each other's arms, or how we end up lying on the couch. She asks me to tell her a story, and I tell her my favorite one about the day I met the most beautiful princess disguised as a normal girl. Eventually, we get up and finish dinner.

"I'm a little disappointed." I admit, as I finish washing the dishes. "You didn't even put up much of a fight when I paid for the groceries. I expected you to at least demand your wallet back by now."

She shrugs. "Sometimes playing along with a child's nonsense is the best course of action. He'll throw fewer tantrums that way."

I scoff and feign offense, taking the dish she just dried from her, so I can put it in the high cupboard. Her laughter catches in her throat as her wallet thumps against her face.

"That hurt." She whines, but the blank expression on her face says she's more annoyed than in pain.

"I'm sorry, princess." I place a tender kiss on her head, followed by another and another.

"Ren!" She's giggling as my lips reach her neck. "That tickles."

Deliberately, I pass over her lips several times. Her mouth follows mine, but I don't let her catch me. I smile down at her. She scowls and reaches up to grasp my hair and pull me down.

I chuckle between kisses. "I've missed you so much." I declare in perfect English before planting another kiss on her lips. "If you kept up the silent treatment I would have died."

She scrunches her brows, then in deliberately formal Japanese she says, "don't be so dramatic. You look perfectly healthy to me."

"On the outside maybe, but I was dying in here." Smiling mischievously, I place her hand over my heart. "And you were here all alone growing more frustrated by the minute." My hands fall to her thighs and squeeze. She gives a cute squeal.

"Ren!" Hands still gripping her thighs, I lift her over my shoulder and carry her to my bedroom.

"As your boyfriend, it is my duty to help you with your frustrations." She gasps as I deposit her onto the bed. I place my hands on her thighs and hold her gaze in mine.

"Ren!" Shaking hands grasp mine and stop me from moving further up.

"Relax." I whisper, leaning forward to kiss her forehead. "I hurt you and for that I deserve to be punished." Before she can interrupt me, I add. "It's ok if you don't want to, but I think that I owe you." I reach into my pocket and pull out a velvet box.

"Ren, I," wide-eyed and confused she touches the box. A surprised squeak escapes her as I lift the lid to reveal my grandmother's engagement ring.

"Don't make that face." I flick her forehead. "It isn't what you think."

I can see the wheels in her head calculating the price of the diamond ring.

"It didn't cost me anything," I confess, knowing that this knowledge will ease her concerns at least a bit. "It was my grandma's ring and she wanted you to have it."

"Me?" she questions, touching the stone as if she fears it might break. I nod, pulling on the small chain it's attached to and holding it out to her. "I've never even met your grandmother."

"Nor will you. She died when I was ten, shortly after I met you." I still remember racing to her house to tell her about the little girl I met in the woods.

"I don't think I can accept it." She tries to pull away, but I take her hand and close her fingers around the ring.

"The day we met, I ran to her to tell her all about you. She teased me about being in love. When she gave me the ring she told me to give it to the one person I loved with all my heart." I brush the hair out of her face. "I carried it around everywhere with me until the day I left Japan. I never could bring myself to give it to you, but I wanted to leave you with something, so I gave you the corn stone."

I kiss her lips, wishing I could tell my grandma that I finally got my princess.

"Kyouko, this ring has always been yours. I love you." I say, pulling her to my chest.

"I love you too," she pauses to look up at me, then says my name, "Corn." Well as close to my name as I think she's comfortable with.

It feels good not wearing the brown contacts around her. I thought about going blond again and wearing the Ren wig while in public. That could prove to be too much of a risk however, and I'd rather avoid accidental exposure. I already almost forgot to put my contacts in before meeting up with Yukihito this morning.

"We should get you to bed." I say, remembering that she has work in the morning. Kyouko yawns and nods her head. I know I don't deserve her, but I hope we're really ok now.

 **A/N: I don't really know what to say. These two just do whatever they want and I don't know how else to explain it besides to say that I'm crazy and I let fictional character run my life.**


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